When were you informed about the fork, after or before it became a hard fork (that means +6 confirmations, right?)?
No, hard fork means that the new rules are more lax than the old rules.
So, if the max block size was increased, that is a hard fork, since it allows blocks that were previously disallowed.
A soft fork bans something that was previously allowed. So, if the max block size was decreased that would be a soft fork.
The difference is how very old clients are handled.
Hard forkOld clients: Old rules only
New clients: New rules and old rules
This means that if the majority of the hashing power is creating blocks under the new rules, you get a split.
The new clients follow the new chain, since it has higher POW and the old clients follow the old chain since the new chain has illegal (under the old rules) blocks.
Soft forkOld clients: New rules and old rules
New clients: New rules only
This means that if the majority of the hashing power is creating blocks under the new rules, you won't get a split.
Sometimes miners using the old software would create blocks that are illegal under the new rules. The new clients won't build on them. Since they have the majority of the hashing power, they will cause the new block to be orphaned.
Old clients would just follow the chain as normal and see a larger orphan rate.
This means that if you propose a soft fork, you can make the change by convincing the majority of the hashing power to accept that change. All clients can follow the new chain. Only miners need to update.
The
pay to script change was a soft fork. It had a voting system built in. If > 55% of miners agreed, the change activated. This was probably a little low for the majority. If support subsequently dropped to 45%, then it could cause a fully fledged fork.