I assume you mean a 3% exchange fee?
That's up to you and the bitcoin provider to negotiate. It can be confusing to talk in terms of "dollars of bitcoin" since bitcoin is a currency of it's own. It's a bit like trying to talk about howm any dollars of euros you have. Also, since the exchange rate can change quickly, an amount of bitcoins can vary quite a bit in its dollar value. It would be much better to simply agree to a specific amount of bitcoins (such as 4.04 BTC) exchanged for a specific amount of pokerstars dollars.
That's up to you and the bitcoin provider to negotiate and agree to. I've engaged in transactions where the other party wanted to lock the exchange rate at the tie of negotiation even though payment wouldn't occur for a few hours. I've also engaged in transactions where the other party wanted to lock the exchange rate at the time the bitcoin transaction was sent. I've also engaged in transactions where the other party wanted to lock the exchange rate at the weighted 24 hour average.
Sure. The transaction is between the two of you. You can agree to whatever you both want to agree to. Nobody else is going to force you to use a different exchange rate.
I typically look at BitStamp, Coinbase, Bitfinex, preev, Google, and Localbitcoins to get an idea what bitcoins are worth. Then I make an offer at a rate that I'm willing to pay.
That's up to you and the bitcoin provider to decide and agree on.
Sure, if that's what you both agree to. If possible, you should make sure that it is very clear exactly how much bitcoins you expect to receive (not how much dollars worth of bitcoins) before you send the payment to the bitcoin provider. That way there won't be any confusion later about how much should have been sent.
I typically use 5 decimal places when working with bitcoin. That's enough to account for the transaction fee and enough that when expressed in dollar value can be easily rounded to the nearest penny.
Or perhaps it means that you would have to give them $1040 for their $1000 in bitcoin? It is best to make sure ahead of time that both you and the other party understand exactly how much dollars they should expect to receive and how many bitcoins you expect to receive.
Yes, if you are both willing to lock the exchange rate at the time of the negotiation, then that's all.
That will depend on when you lock the rate, how long it takes for you to send the payment, whether or not you are using an escrow provider, how many confirmations your wallet (or you) require on the transaction, and how long it is until you spend the bitcoins.
I've been involved in transactions that took 3 days. I've been involved in transactions that took 30 seconds. It really depends on who you are dealing with. Typically, I'd say it takes between 10 minutes and 3 hours for someone to verify that they've received a payment from me and to send the bitcoins to me.