Topic: Can you disguise on your real gambling lifestyle just to help a friend/relative? (Read 628 times)

That's because they had the bad experienced before in gambling and they knows how to prevents that so that will not happens again to them. People who can recovers from the addiction will share how they did that to other people who needed, especially other people is closer to them. They already lose much before and will not wants to repeat the bad experienced. But most people who often playing gambling without any limits can gets addiction easily.

It will be a lucky for people who doesn't gets addicted to gambling because they have a chance to protect themselves from the addiction. But they must learn how to manage their money and time, including learning about self control because without that, they will difficult to use gambling properly and will gets addicted to gambling soon.

You said it with right because only a few people who can limits themselves playing gambling and realizes about the risks of playing gambling. They knows the consequences of losing the money in gambling so they will always avoids the big lose when they playing gambling. They will not share everything they knows about gambling to many people but they will share it to their closer relatives or friends who needed. They will also helps them who wants to cure their addiction in gambling because they knows what will happens to those people and their family if they addicted to gambling. Even if they are not addicted to gambling, they already have much experiences and learn from other people experiences. That's why if we wants to keeps playing gambling occasionally, we must have self control to avoids any problem that can occurs later.

You are human, and not a robot so it's normal to make mistakes, and the most important thing is to recover from your mistakes before it results to real damages which I see you were able to achieve, Kudos to you.

Being around gambling addicts affects the person with good intentions negatively as such person is prone to join in the bad habit, so its enough righteousness not to join their campaign, and advising them positively will give you some kind of respect and prestige in their presence especially when they don't see you make the same obvious mistakes they are making, you should also strive more to be like what you preach because one bad step from you the preacher would invalidate all your many years of being a role model and make your friends see you as a double face instead of a real person.


Any hidden thing would definitely come out to light one day, the key is striving to be like what you preach so you don't look fake and without integrity when your real bad habits surfaces. If you must tell someone that he or she is wrong in what they are doing, you must make sure you are not a culprit of the same crime.

On the contrary, I am a person who has a problem with gambling. especially, when it was still young and at that time online casinos were not as popular as they are today. Generally, I bet in physical casinos or betting shops. Well, that's precisely what made me now have experience related to gambling. It's not uncommon for me to get lost during betting sessions, for some people this is something that they often experience. Please understand, at that time I didn't really have much understanding about gambling. and if someone like you frequently refers to other people's experiences, especially as you take the time to watch interviews related to gambling and addiction. it may be able to give you an overview, understanding, essence based on the experience of the source and most importantly, what we get from the points that you think can be applied and useful.

for me because I have a long experience with gambling, especially when I was still in the addiction phase. reviewing personal experience is more than enough, the rest we can examine what is wrong with the gambling we do so that it becomes addictive and wastes a lot of time and of course money. Over time, that experience also gave us a lot of understanding regarding gambling. The point is, as a result of experience, I am no longer too ambitious to make a lot of money in one night. I changed all my gambling methods to involve experience, knowledge, responsibility and understanding. that's why, I limit myself and it's important to know the limits that only I can afford. choose the ideal bet, for me football. Anyway, getting rid of addiction is not as easy as we say. because, there are phases that must be implemented. moreover, it requires knowledge and involves self-control. and the importance, determination and intention. unfortunately, not everyone who gets addicted does so easily.

It's rare today to have people like that, the ones who know their limitations in the things they do and know what they should and shouldn't do because they are aware of the possible consequences if they are not careful with the actions they do. . He doesn't need to announce the effect of gambling on a person because we all have different experiences when it comes to gambling stuffs and it seems that there is no need to say that because everyone is aware of what it causes, it's just not Only other people can adapt the advice given to them or they will not learn by listening to other people's advice, not unless they themselves have experienced it.

Most of the gambling addiction story from influencers usually experienced the worst before they recover from it. They recover from this addiction they already loss most of his many that makes him incapable to gamble anymore or in short his addiction was naturally cured because he can’t gamble anymore.

People that already can share their experience usually overcome this addiction completely. It’s very hard to snap from addiction without losing most of your money because you can only realize that you are badly addicted if most of your money already loss.

He really lucky can realizes about his addiction and knows how to solved his problems. Not many people like him that can cured his addiction and now he tells to many people about the dangerous of the gambling addiction. Most people will not knows about their addiction and will thinks that they still okay playing gambling so they will not stops their gambling activity. If many more people like him and can gives his story about addiction and can inspired many people, maybe many people can realizes that they are addicted to gambling and wants to search for the way to cure their addiction. What people with addicted to gambling must do trying to open their minds and accept the reality that they are addicted to gambling and needs to solve the problem before they gets the worst things in their lives.

I've never had problems with gambling addiction, but I watched a video on the Internet about a guy who was a former problem gambler.
He gave a great interview where he talked about how he realized his addiction and defeated it, and now he wants to tell everyone how very dangerous gambling can be. And this guy was really very addicted - during the interview there were inserts from his streams when he was still a gambler.
And it was a completely different personality!

I think this is a great example of getting rid of addiction.

As an individual, if you're giving advise to people and not living up to your advise then that's a waste of time cause you should be living by example, gambling is not bad but if an individual who gambles is to advise people concerning gambling then the individual must be a responsible gambler and not someone who's addicted to it and think any friend of the OP would emulate him if they're sensible.

 Yes cause from his statement it shows that he's not a reckless gambler, he gambles responsibly and such person who be a good example to the society that gambling as an act is not a bad idea but reckless gambling is and like I said earlier any responsible friend that wants to change their irresponsible habit would emulate his ways to help themselves from being addicted.

Yeah, that's like someone telling you you should stop smoking because it is injurious to your health but has a cigarette in his mouth himself. How would the words of such a person make any impact? I would never stop doing something if someone asked me to stop while that person is doing that thing himself and I can clearly see it.

This is why they say we should practice what we preach. Other people will only adapt to a change you are suggesting to them if they see that change in you and your personality should have some influence on them to make them accept what you are offering them.

Your words have no value for others if you don't give any value to your words yourself.

Most of the gamblers that are addicted know the damage of how addiction can be and they preach to others not to get addicted, I think this is a normal thing in life. Their are some bad habits that we exhibit that will let people know not to emulate, it is not that one is Saint bit the truth is that one understand that the effect of the lifestyle and wouldn't want some one to fall victim because how difficult it can be to come out from it.  

I don't think it is pretending to be better but being open to let people understand and to think about what they are about going to. Me as a gambler i will always advice people that are close to me because you never can tell, if they go into it can be worse for them because it is not everybody that have good understanding to know what is not good for them.

First of all, we don't owe any explanation for our gambling habits as long as it doesn't affect any of our surroundings because after all it considers us only and nobody else.
I think what you are trying to do to your friends is actually a good thing, trying not to influence them and help them takes some steps back of their actions while gambling.  It true that some actions are very influencable, they might see you gamble irresponsibly and think what they are doing isn't wrong and might find comfort doing that knowing they are not the only ones who do it, so it is actually good to spread good gambling behaviour and let them learn from it.

Sometimes when I screw up in my bets or figure out I did something wrong I tell my fellow gambler friend to not fall into the same mistakes I do too.
But why don't you actually do like you tell your friend you do? I mean you deeply know it is the right way to gamble but you still secretly drive into a bad action, I am not judging you though we all Sometimes do stupid things while gambling.

A good listner will always gain a lot from others even if you are not doing anything wrong still something that comes from other end can help us in our life at some point but who really have such kind of attitude in this era. Self criticizing is important too if both the person involved in the gambling and one who gives guidance should be following it before advising someone to follow it or else it has no use at all.

Well, individual opinions should be accorded but I can tell you that there is no leadership trust of a blind man leading other blinds.
So, there is absolutely no way your advice would have effects to that gambler when obviously the irresponsible gambler is aware that you too is also an irresponsible gambier.
Definitely the gambler would expect you to fix the negative gambling side of yourself up firstly before you can fix him up if actually you know what is right is worth doing and what is wrong is not worth it.

At some points, we have to be self-sacrifice to achieve a goal if cares to help the gambler out because you will have to play that disguise role but if you don't care, then the choice would always be left for the gambler to decide his fate.

If you disguise for the good of others it's all good because it helps others how to be a responsible gambler just by seeing you got the best plans and limits which I think is very helpful but sometimes we ourselves is a victim to our own disguise. 😅 The thing is that most gamblers sucks on budgetting I mean sometimes when we feel "greedy" we spend more than the money we have which is the stepping stone for being an irresponsible gambler.

There is this saying that you must walk the talk.

It can be quite challenging to give someone an advice about on particular act in which you do not follow personally. For example, if you are an avid gambler and you want to disguise your habits by helping others, you can give advice but it may not be as efficient compared to others. Also, if you cannot associate yourself on the advice that you are giving, then there is that tendency that the person you are helping with may not be affected at all.

Though I do understand that you truly want to help to the point that you want to disguise your habits, I think it would be better if you could also apply what you are saying to others to yourself at first.

In conclusion, it is difficult to tell people what to do if you, yourself, do not follow it. Practice what you preach and you will see the difference first-hand that will enable you to share with others with certainty.

Just be honest with them, I don't get it why you need to lie about it? What would you get by doing it?
You have been around them for a long time and they have been honest to you the whole time, you just wants them to look up to you, but you know that it was all just a lie to make yourself better than them.

If you are not comfortable to share something about your gambling habit since you are afraid to get bad judgement towards the action you do then hide it sometimes it good to tell white lies or hide something so that there's something on our lifestyle will not get bothered by someone. Especially if there's no need to tell so decide according to where you are comfortable since your peace of mind is more important that anything else. Also if you are not really ready to be called anything  what make you feels bad then maybe its time for you to think something if its still really worth to gamble since if you are bothered on how your friends or relatives call you then think about setting aside this activity and live a normal life without participating on any gambling activities.

I actually curious about your statement here "
I have been around my gambling friends and I have always acted to be 100% sticking to my gambling budgets such as how many times, a specific time and how much to spend on my gambling.
Once awhile I actually breaks that budget but though it does not affect my daily life and my bankrolls."

If I were you Im gonna stick with the budget, tho you said is not affect your daily life and your bankrools at least today, stay inline with a budget is part of money management and you didn't now what is going happen in future, what I was scared is you keep out of your budget and this become a routine and that is going to be dangerous 

I wont be surprised because i have seen people who disguise themselves into a bad situation with the aim of saving a friend, siblings or relative that has been in there for long. But one thing is certain, it is a risky decision to make because you are putting you life at stake during these processes. Two things will be certain, you may see reason on why your friend choses to do those things and join him or you will save him from such habit gradually. What you need now is the power of conviction, if you can be able to convince your friend in that situation and make him understand that what the both of you are doing doesn't help or benefit yo guys in anyway. Then suggest that you both quit if not it will be too late very soon.

IMHO, i would say its a bad idea to join your friend on the gambling lifestyle he is living, if you fail to change him things could possibly go wrong because there wont be anyone left to change the both of you. Avoid his lifestyle and show him your progress with the lifestyle you are living he would change.

First of all I don't actually believe that people are ignorant about making money by doing gambling but they still choose to do for some reasons that could be anything, getting addicted is extreme consequences but let's not get into that. Telling them about approaching bets is good but if I am saying stop then the person may start hating me even if I tried to good for them and I don't really want me to put into that situation.

Every gambler must have experienced a time when they can't control themselves, maybe because they are a new gambler or because they are single person so that their income will belong to them completely unlike gamblers who already have a family to support, or maybe as a gambler, they have a large income and don't think about investing so that even if they play more than they can afford by going into debt later they will still be able to pay their debts because they have a large income.
So far I've never told anyone about my gambling activities, does that help my friend? I don't know, I just feel sorry for some people who think of gambling as a way to earn money and when they win they think they will continue to be able to earn the same thing.

It is okay to give advice to friends but it is not okay to disguise the idea of gambling to help someone. We all know that gambling is high risk and there is no exact guarantee of winning how can gambling help your relative. Rather the gambler will incur more losses that may lead him to worse. You have to come out of this negative side and keep yourself under control and help your friends and relatives in other ways other than gambling so that you don't have to suffer. Maintain discipline and give them proper advice.

We'll it's a necessity that you should be truthful in your dealings cause you may not know who's watching you from a distance,yes advising a friend not to gamble whereas you are and at same time hiding it is not a good idea but rather it's better of they are being told of that negative thing your into so as to know how to go about it,but you advising and still on it will give them doubt and no room of regarding you as anything cause they might be like your doing it too so why the advice,so literally you don't have to disguise yourself tell them how it is.

I feels about that because sometimes what we tells to them is difficult to be accepted by them. After all, they don't have the same minds as us. We can still tells them or suggesting or guiding them but if they don't wants to listens, we can't forces them to follows. They are adult and could thinks about what they wants so we should lets them decide by themselves. Maybe they will needs to see the consequences and gets the effects so they can see the reality about what they are doing and can thinks that they needs to listen to other people. Sometimes they needs to gets the bad experience first before they wants to listen to the suggestion so they can learns something from what they do. If they can thinks about the mistakes, they will learns that they needs to change themselves and try to listen the others.

I have friends too who gamble and they try as much as listening to me when I advise them. I do not disguise myself just to please anybody. I am real and they know me for the that. Whenever I advise them they listen and hid to my advice because of how disciplined I am.  Some times you just do not do things to convince your friends but rather you just have to be who you are and not to please them always so that they would really rely on you for advice or backup whenever such arises.
Do not be two faced because that alone would make you lose value were they are. They might not trust your judgement d would be sceptical of whatever that comes out of your mouth. If this happens them your integrity is at stake.

I learned from my past experiences (as a gambler without control, spending all my salary in gambling) I was so hooked to the point I forgot my responsibilities. That experience is an eye opener for me to not repeat the same mistakes again. It became my example to people I know (that are also into gambling) to always have discipline.

Because it's hard to overcome the addiction if you are already there. If keeping my real status as a gambler can help someone then why not? But in my case there's nothing to hide since i'm already done as a gambler without control.

you give good advice and comfort them by giving examples from your own experience but you yourself can't apply the things you tell them to yourself, you just pretend that you are in a good state when you face them but deep inside you are facing problems and you are not always okay. I've never experienced what you did but the only advice I can give to you OP, maybe it's better not to give advice to other people even if you improve your self image in their eyes, it's better to choose and help yourself first before other people.

I know for sure that inside me there lives a terrible gambler who can place bets and lose absolutely everything that I can bet, there will be no limit on this. But the thing is that I never show this hidden part of my madness to my friends or anyone else, because they simply won’t recognize me if I start doing such things. Of course, if my true friend needs help, then I will be ready to do a lot to help him with this, even show my crazy part. It depends on the complexity of my friend’s situation, if it’s not difficult, then maybe I won’t be able to show it, in general, I’ll have to understand each specific situation as a whole.

I don't understand the essence of what you are asking in this thread, but for the words you explain above, I have a principle that I adhere to. Well, let's just say that every gambling we do is based on self-control and responsibility. then we hope or want, some of our friends imitate what we do as an "EXAMPLE". Well, this example point is actually irrelevant to what we are discussing. I mean, subconsciously we have claimed that we are good and responsible gamblers. even though in reality, this is a one-sided claim according to psychology. To be an "EXAMPLE", it's actually not something that's easy. Even if you really claim to be responsible for the gambling budget and the rules you apply, it may not necessarily be viewed favorably by other gamblers.

OK, allow me to assume from my personal point of view. If I were you, and I had a discussion with my friend regarding how to gamble well. I mean, more precisely so that they don't gamble excessively. At that point, my job as a friend is finished to tell or share experiences. the rest is up to them and how they approach their gambling. because in essence it is awareness that inspires someone to make changes, and this applies not only to gambling. I don't need to be a good example to imitate, because this claim is too heavy for me. just by discussing, giving appropriate advice, that is more than enough. the rest, it all depends on them with their gambling.

Talking about the negative side, basically or unconsciously we have this talent from birth. So, there is no one who does not have a negative side. "in the broadest sense".
Regarding hiding the gambling life that we do, everything is the right of every gambler. well, for me it's something like that.

While I understand your desire to set a positive example for your gambling friends and help them regain control of their emotions, it is important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. Gambling can be a complex and personal matter, and each individual may have different experiences and challenges associated with it.

It is commendable that you strive to stick to your gambling budgets and maintain a level of control over your bankroll. However, it is crucial to recognize that not everyone may possess the same level of self-discipline or emotional control when it comes to gambling. While you can offer support and guidance to your friends, it is important to remember that each person's journey towards responsible gambling is unique.

As for your question about negative sides to gambling habits, it is essential to acknowledge that gambling can have adverse effects on individuals if not approached responsibly. Some individuals may struggle with addiction, financial difficulties, or emotional distress due to excessive gambling. It is crucial to encourage responsible gambling practices and promote awareness of the potential risks associated with gambling.

When it comes to helping an astray gambling friend or relative, it is important to strike a balance between offering support and respecting their privacy. It is not necessary to hide your own experiences or disreputable gambling habits if they exist, but it is equally important to approach the situation with sensitivity and understanding. Encouraging open and honest conversations about gambling habits can foster a supportive environment where individuals feel comfortable seeking help if needed.

Remember, the goal should be to promote responsible gambling practices, offer support, and encourage individuals to seek professional help if their gambling habits become problematic.

Yes, it's not our business to stop someone from gambling but we as loved ones can try our best to guide them about gambling responsibility. We should also guide them that gambling isn't for making money but a way to entertain ourselves, and we should never consider it as a way to earn so much money as that's not possible for everyone.

If still they don't listen our words and ignore us by saying that we are not aware of it, or it allows them to earn money then we should stop saying anything else to such people. It's not worth it to spend your energy and stamina to guide whose who don't listen, and I believe we should try our best to distance ourselves from such people.

I'm not even your family member, friend, or close person, etc... but I'm also proud of you. This is because it's not easy to do for a normal individual and we can only wish we are on the same boat as you, so that we will never experience the negative side of gambling, ever again but even on that simply words you said there, we can still learn from it or use that as a motivation to improve our selves as well.

For those who think they have a problem in gambling, it is still commendable if they can act that they don't have it, only to encourage others to stop gambling or help them to get out of the same problem and maybe this can help them to apply it on their own too, later on.

Exactly, it's none of our business no matter even if the person is your blood relative, of course we have the responsibility to guide them but in gambling, I don't think so, I may give a few tries if the person is really close to me and if they don't care then why should I care?

They are adults just like me so they should know what they are supposed to do and not, and if they violate it then they have to face the consequences too.

I have this attitude back in the time that i chase my losses , i remember that my one whole week paycheck had to spend all the way because i choose to chase my losses instead of giving up?

for me this is the attitude that don't wanna be to others because now i know that we need to let it go when luck isn't our friend that time because there is always next time to deal with our losses.

recovering our spending can take several time before finally won .

I agree with you, people generally don't like to listen to other people's advice, everyone has their own way of thinking. It can be said that we are all like that and only when something bad happens to us do we learn from it. For sure we all have "bad sides" and "bad things" that happen to us from time to time, and we alone learn how to deal with them... with more experience, we know how to avoid them or in some cases how to hide them from others. Self-control is something we get along the way.

I am generally not good at disguising, I will say what's on my mind, if not I will turn around and walk away. It's not smart to talk with everyone, no matter how we say it, some people will misunderstand us. So sometimes it's better to keep quiet and mind our own business.

At least what you say to your friend can change the way your friend plays gambling a little. Whether it happens to you or not, sometimes we can give advice but we can't consistently implement it for ourselves.
That's natural, but as much as possible when you say or suggest something to your friend, it should also or better apply to advising yourself as well.
If you have good intentions, the results you get will definitely be good.

But the thing is, you are not showing your true self. I mean, yes, OP maybe is not affected by his gambling, even though sometimes he is going overboard with his budget or limit in terms of funds in gambling. But the thing is, you are still negating your limit, which is not a good indication because at some point you will feel the effect of excessive gambling, and sometimes you are overextending your budget, which means it can accumulate and you will feel its effect eventually. I get the intention of OP to make his friend follow his disguised attitude towards gambling, but the question for yourself is, do you think you are worthy of that? advising them and educating them not to do excessive gambling while you are breaking your limit? I get that not all are perfect, but the fact that you know yourself and that you sometimes break your limit means you are also subject to becoming what you are teaching them not to do.

If i am actually required to put on such a pretence attitude in such a way that I can help a friend get free of their hurtful behavior in gambling, I can do it. I am good in acting and I will practically act righteous in his presence so he can learn from my example but when he is not around, I will go back to my normal gambling style.

I don't have any negative gambling habit, people that have such habits lacks self control.

Just like sometimes you don't feel proud to say you had a huge loss, you can reduce the loss when you are asked. Or sometimes you also want to increase your profit when actually it was not up to that.

Advise is people should not always follow what they read or see because that may not represent the reality. Do what you feel will be right for your self.


I'm not even surprised at your story and fear with your friends, you are not the only one in that shoe much as many other people are doing that. It is not easy to keep the emotions away from gambling which is why you see the loses. Many would advise the proper thing to do but they can't keep up to it. It is difficult to control your emotion when you are losing

Addiction is enough to be considered as negative side of gambling which is Common to every gambler. Though some people don't see  addiction as problem but surely it is. The only only advice I can give to a friend is not to gamble what he can't afford to lose or stop chasing after loses because all this put together is the actual cause of addiction.

There is no point hiding your disreputable gambling life. It is good to explain your predicament for people to learn from your previous mistakes and make a correction. Even though I know most people may still not change after you may have explained to them. Because such habit is a self determination to conquer. But you should play your part atleast to save yourself from guit.

I don't give advice to anyone not just gambling but anything cause no one really gives attention to what we say until they learn the lesson by themselves, so stop wasting time by doing things which is not going to make any change. I do have a bad side so does everyone, once in a while it may go out of control but as long as it doesn't affect me or anyone that I care then it is completely fine.

The question is this... If you have to hide your gambling habits from the friend you are trying to help, are you actually helping that person?

What does it say about you, when you have to lie to a friend? You should just open up to that person and be honest about your problem and then seek some proffesional help for both of you. This way, you can support eachother and find ways to control the urge to gamble.

The gambling problem start out with small increases in your gambling budget and it gathers momentum like a snow ball running down a hill.. so you should give attention to it, whilst it is still under your control.   

I find this to be common not only when gambling but almost in any other aspect of our lives, after all I have known nutritionists that keep advising people to eat healthy food and watch their weight, and yet they had some of the most unhealthy habits when it came to their own diet.

So as long as what you are experimenting is not that bad, I do not see a problem with it, as we are bound to make mistakes once in a while, and losing a little bit of extra money while gambling is not really that big of a deal.

Dude, every person lies at some point in their life, I'm sure that you did too so I don't get the moral crisis that you're getting at though? If the only sin is lying and being a traitor or hypocrite to the principle that you pretend to stick too and there's really no person out there that would be pained or hurt emotionally or physically of your white lies then why be afraid of that, you're helping them understand that you can be an example for them to follow and it's not like you've got a bad intention from lying to them, think of it this way, if the lie continues to be more benefit to them then go for it but the moment that it starts to hurt someone, you're probably going to need to start doing something about it.

If you're in a plane hijacked by a terrorist group and the only way to get out of that situation is to lie, would you do it? Pretty sure that you would do it, my point is that you can lie to save yourself and there's times and places that are good for it, not tolerating the lying part though, again, I don't tolerate lies with malicious intent, that's different.

Just as said that two wrongs can not make a right, that is how it is when you advices a friend or relative to stop gambling excessively because it would affect their financial lives even to their personal lives and loved ones when obviously you too are on the same track with them.
It feels that you do not want them to succeeded because you would be expected to had also quit from it if you knew about it would be backfired.

So to navigate on this so that your friends can put your words in considerations to quit from their addictions, you have to live them with examples by keeping yours negative side hidden.

And you too personally with your endivoirs to understand your are also not on the good track should effortlessly consist on making changes because it is foolish on oneself to disregard yourself and embraces to encourage others from their bad deeds.

There's no need to hide it if both of you are on the same level. But I would go to the extent of talking to the person who has the same problem as me and use our experiences to change our bad habits.

I will be using my smoking habit as an example. I used to smoke half a pack of cigarettes per day but now I am clean for 5 years or maybe more. I forgot when I stopped. Now, I still have friends who smoke while some switched to vaping. What I use are the good effects of being clean with it. Better taste, I can taste the food much better now. Better breathing, because the lungs are clean I could breathe well. Better smell of anything unlike when I was smoking where everything smells like nothing.

I think we should be using our experiences in gambling, the bad ones especially to share it and maybe someone will learn from those mistakes and change their habit when it comes to gambling. I like people who are brave enough to do that because it ain't easy to tell but it might help another so they they will still pull the courage to do so.

Well, I don't have a negative side of gambling in me, however, I do tell people who gamble to practice responsible gambling because that is the only way to avoid excessive losses. I often see people spending a lot of money on gambling, and what's worse is that they sometimes manage to win some money initially, but because they don't have patience and can't control the urge, they gamble again only to increase their winnings and eventually lose what they have won along with their bankroll.

So, what I tell them all the time is that they should stop when the time is right which means that if they have already won something on top of their deposited amount, they should stop and withdraw the money, and even if they see they are losing constantly, they should stop as well.

It's not bad to lie if it's for the good of others and that kind of lying doesn't have a huge effect on you in general. Consider it more like a promoting a good habit or good example for them, I do have some gambling habits and of course I do share them to my friends and I just gave them an insight why it's not a good idea. For example spending my whole week budget in one day of gambling instead of setting a lose threshold per day this is just some simple bad habits that I do before and shared to my friends to avoid it.

Have I ever found myself in this position before? Maybe only if I am trying to advice someone about gambling, especially the younglings, my advice to them is to avoid gambling, they are still young, and young people tend to be very hooked to something they want to do or plan to do.

Apart from this I have nothing to hide, although I don't have friends who are into gambling, they could be gambling behind my back but none of us have opened up about engaging in gambling activities.

I gamble in my dark room for a reason, I don't want anyone to know about it, this is my little dark secret, I only know how to control myself when it comes to gambling doubt that others can do the same thing, I will always encourage against gambling, unless the person is much older.

Everyone has a negative side to their gambling habits but they don't show it to others. It's a normal thing to do because we don't want other people to know the negative side. It's better for us to keep the negative side to ourselves and always try to reduce that negative side.

I don't need to hide my gambling life just to help a friend. Playing gambling requires individual responsibility so we must be able to do it correctly. If our friends cannot be responsible with their gambling, we can give them advice.

They don't need to make us a good example because it depends on them. They can start reducing their gambling activities if they feel they are starting to overdo it. We must be able to limit our gambling and that is what we must tell our friends and relatives.

I have none because I am always a better example to my family and friends when in terms of
gambling because I know how to manage and control each time I gamble things that they love how
i am doing such when they cannot even stand in table when they are dealing in gambling any
game that they are into.

I think in gambling there is always a negative side and sometimes it becomes a habit even though I always don't want to show the negative side habits but let me alone know it others don't need to know except fellow gamblers but it won't be loose in telling it.

I hide gambling because there is a strong reason that close relatives should not know about me, I am afraid that they will become addicted as a result of seeing me play gambling so it is better to hide and they do not need to know about gambling.

Gambling is almost known among many people even if he does not play but knows how to play it can be considered bad behavior so I never show it.

Sometimes if someone is experiencing bad luck in their gambling, they don't want to see other people also feel what they feel, therefore you advise your friends to control themselves and not get emotional easily if they lose money in their gambling. This is something that usually happens to among gamblers we also can't win sure and gambling is full of risks, the most important thing is that you can still realize that you sometimes go beyond your limits but it still doesn't affect your life or your daily finances and you can still advise other people even though you yourself also experience what is happening experience your friends.

Gamblers can always advise other people while they have difficulty advising and managing themselves, your mind and heart seem to disagree, maybe your left brain thinks you want to be careful about gambling and limit your gambling, but your right brain seems to think that we can find a little more luck by continuing try it so this is what makes a person uncontrollable and leads to addiction, we must be able to advise ourselves first before advising others so that other people also believe that we are truly safe from gambling and they can follow our example.

Definitely if your habit or fake lifestyle can really influence any people or help a friend or relative, then it’s definitely not an issue I guess. I know it’s very hard to control while you gamble. Still if you pretend that you are following the rule, not gambling over the budget for your friends or relative, then it’s completely fine according to me. They learn from you, hence it’s good to pretend about this. We need to control as much as possible to not go pass beyond the boundaries which might harm money or lifestyle due to gambling.

It's more like passing the lesson i've learned from my gambling mistakes. I'm always down to tell a friend the stuff I know about gambling and pass on what I know so they don't go through the same mistakes.

I don't see the need to hide my gambling activities only to help someone, it's still mainly up to them to fix their gambling issues. I'd rather tell them about my gambling activities and make them understand that it's common for gamblers to fall for these countless mistakes.

Dunno really. In the past maybe. But nowadays? I'm sticking to using 5% of my salary on gambling and only that, never exceeding it. I even use any leftovers from my past session so sometimes that 5% can even go lower. As for friends, well, most of my gambling friends went the same way as me, bad habits turned good after a couple of years.

Some outliers may be for some of my new friends but I've always tried to advocate how bad it can go for them so they should start turning back and changing now. It's pretty hard to prove though since the sense of money now is rather different compared to back then when I still had my bad habits which was around the end of high school to college. $20 looked pretty big back then.

If you're a person that needs to hide your gambling activities because of the reputation that your family has, you will hide it no matter what not to conceal what you are up.

But it is not to take any longer when you're going to be vulgar about it because you can't take it anymore that your lifestyle includes gambling.

In the end, you have to be true to yourself so that you're able to move freely whether you gamble or does any other things that you want and you have nothing to worry about being known to be a gambler.

Totally depends on what kind of person are you whether you are an honest one or something that you would really be in state of denial and acting out more cool in front of other people.
Yes, its understandable that there are individuals who would really be that trying out to hide their flaws and acting cool but deep inside they are still in loses but the good thing on here
is that you've been giving out some good advises that people should really be avoiding this and that so that they would really be able to end up on having those loses and since
you are someone who do have that kind of situation then you are really that relatable on such condition or situation on which it would be wise that you should be giving out some advises
on other people on which at least they will really be able to avoid those potential conditions too because of the advises that you have said.

I believe you will also help your friends/relatives by being true to yourself. The reality is no gambler can really be strict to himself and follow all the rules you want to implement to yourself. I think if you tell that to your friends, I believe they are not 100% sure if you are telling the truth because as a gambler, you know the emotions involved. Even occasional gamblers know that at some point you are going beyond your limits, but so long you go back to your senses and not follow your emotions, it means, you still have self-awareness of what's going on. So I guess, they will just say yes in front of you, but deep inside they have doubts about your genuineness.

I think the only way to help your friend or relative when it comes to gambling is to be more genuine on your gambling habit, and show him what gambling is certainly all about. No need to hide something that you don’t want other gamblers to see or experience, because every gambler will certainly experience the same struggles of a gambler, it’s up to the gambler itself how he will respond to certain situations.

Not hitting the betting plan is actually normal, but what is not normal is that if you pretend to someone that everything will work in gambling, but in reality we all know that gambling can be so annoying and destructive, most especially if you easily fall into gambling addiction.

I don't have any bad habits. I'm not a gambling addict so I can't think about what it would be like to be a gambling addict. The only thing I did was I hid my gambling habit from my friends or anyone. Firstly, I don't like being known by people. Second, I want to help my friends who are lost in gambling. I always say what will happen if someone is addicted to gambling so that they can be wiser in deciding what is best for themselves. I don't like inviting someone to gamble if I know he has a selfish nature and can't control his emotions.

Hiding the real life of gambling, with assistance to help those who have problems with gambling is not a good enough solution, because it cannot help them to overcome the core problems they experience.

Means offering moral support, practical advice, or directing and guiding them to get the right treatment from a professional. I think this is the best solution to help those who have problems with gambling. This is the right step that can help them recover. This can help them regain control over their bad gambling habits.

You may have quite good experience in managing a gambling activity. But it is important to have empathy for those caught in the cycle of irresponsible and impulsive gambling. So, take a little of our time to just listen, give advice, support and assistance, which are quite good steps compared to hiding the truth or giving examples that may not be appropriate to the conditions and situations they are experiencing.

I can relate with this situation typical of a gambler like myself. I have never falling into gambling addiction net before since I started gamble, yet, I do give strong warning to people close to me that are contemplating on starting gambling. I discourage them from even thinking about it, as I believe that not everyone is emotionally strong to uphold a character of self discipline in gamble.

It only takes those that have had the experience of what and how intoxicating gambling really can be to discourage those outside with the intend of coming in, mostly especially for the gambler that have experience gambling addiction and survived, they know better, and will even be advising their fellow gamblers to gamble with caution.

The fact is that all gamblers know the disadvantages of gambling but it can be controlled based on the mindset in which you have whenever you are gambling. Some people know that chasing their losses will only incur more losses but they prefer to play more believing that the more they play, the more their chances of winning is high, amd before you know it, they will become addicted that it is only to win that is in their mind.

Am addict cannot pretend or hide his addictive lifestyle from anyone, because he cannot control himself. It is only those that are responsible gamblers that can consider a friend who is going astray with gambling, in order to see how he can help his friend out from going astray.

No, before I show and advise them to gamble, of course I will first show them the negative side, so that they understand the risks of gambling, by showing the negative side if they continue automatically I will not be blamed if defeats and losses occur, understanding the negative side of gambling is important so as not to get frustrated.

Can't afford it, I don't hide anything in gambling, towards friends and relatives, they have to know how I gamble and vice versa, there is no transparent cover for me more calm.

Fortunately I have never had a problem with gambling addiction, and none of my relatives or friends have it either, as far as I know at least. But I like cryptos which are another way of gambling to some extent, and I feel the same as you related: even if I hold them, I tell my friends to be cautious and I don't encourage them to put their money there. So, even if I gambled more, my answer would be the same.

With Bitcoin is a little bit different, but I focus my explanations in the underlying philosophy, and not in the money they could eventually win (because who knows).

Joining every gambling conversation on the internet. Following to influencers who give odds and do giveaway. Tweeting, reposting, and giving likes to any gambling and sports betting giveaway on the internet. This was my negative side or bad habit. Since I used a different alias, my friends couldn't identify that it was their friend. And what I did was exactly what I advised them against. Well, I changed. I dissociated myself from the social media account by deleting it and starting afresh. This time avoiding gambling related conversations there.

I've done it so many times I tried to control my urge to play more which that was allocated whenever I'm with friends, especially if your friends are new to gambling and do not know the facts about gambling, you should show them how to play responsibly even if you're not a perfect example because you don't want them to be astray and lose a lot of money and get depressed like what I'm experiencing when I'm losing a lot of money.

When you know and have seen how addiction to gambling is bad you don't want any of your friends or relatives to lose themselves and become addicted to gambling so you will do what is necessary to discourage them not to take too much gambling.

Many threads have already been created in this section, but I believe you are the first to ask these questions


In my case I don't have any negative side when it comes to gambling, from an early age when I got into gambling and had many defeats I learned to set myself many limits of which I always look at them and say to myself that it was an excellent decision, for example I only place sports bets on games in the major European leagues. But I have been following games from other leagues, but I don't place bets. As a result, I spend little time in casinos, I put little money into playing and when the games from the big European leagues end, I also take a sports betting holiday, I just watch games from other leagues, such as the games from the European leagues. Brazil


I don't hide, I don't see any reason to hide when I play or hide what I play. I don't have problems with gambling, I'm of legal age and I know that I'm gambling very responsibly, that's why I don't hide when I play, when someone else asks me for more information about gambling, I promptly tell them. everything I know and including I give you a big warning that you cannot play with the intention of making a profit, because I saw many of my friends and relatives asking me if the game made money and I told them that it didn't and that the aim of the games was to have fun and didn't like this answer

If the other person is really close to us then we would never want him to lose money and get stressed.
I guess every person would do the same and won't let the other lose their control over gambling while they themselves are losing it.
Although it hasn't happened to me in gambling but it has happened to me while trading.
I had placed few orders few months back and the portfolio was going down but suggested my friends not to invest in those assets.

Currently, I don't have any, it was long ago my habit of gambling was bad, and I do feel ashamed of telling my friends about my gambling lifestyle because if I do, they will insult the hell out of me due to the fact I am an addicted gambler who spends the whole of his days in a gambling house, looking for wins, whereby ended up losing.

Ever since there have been changes in my gambling habits for years now, I talk to my friends boldly and I try to advise those who are not gambling right to minimize their engagement in gambling because the losses in gambling are way more than the wins. Is not what a gambler should take as a source of income.

I do the same thing 'coz it is not something to brag about or for other people to know of. No one's perfect and it would be much better to serve as a good example for them than to learn things the hard way. White lies as I like to call it because it is for them to be warned and to just be disciplined with their gambling habits. Risk is too big with gambling and that's never a hidden fact. Whwt are the odds of them to do the same thing if they'd know you are exceeding or crossing your limit with your bets? Huge; they might even try it for themselves to prove something. Prevention is always better than cure. Never wait for anyone to experience it as well, and if you're also guilty of this, put the lesson into your life as well.

It is with the idea of maintaining a certain image. There's nothing wrong with it if your purpose is for other people to be doing your wrong doings. Some are hiding the idea because they're ashame of it which also means they know it's wrong and that should be enough for them to not do it again, as they should.

Whether our gambling is good or bad depends on a person's maturity, and even if we still have negative or bad gambling, and if they are close friends and open to each other, it is a good thing.
And we can differentiate between maturity and gambling, and even though we like to gamble. We must have maturity so that sometimes we fellow gamblers must be able to exchange ideas and also find solutions to each other and give good advice so that all negative things that happen can be corrected, but this is only for close friends.
And if that happens then it will be a fun chat, because when I gather there are also people who like to gamble and tell each other stories and if something goes wrong then the others will fix it and provide solutions and so on. Because no gambler is perfect.

I think it has become a thing that is most likely bound to happen, I once cornered my friend when he lost a lot of money from gambling, with him saying no problem with the large amount of money he had lost, but there I kept saying "you must be upset" just like that until he was upset himself, actually my intention like that was just to joke, but indeed I think losing a lot of money in gambling must be upsetting, there is no way everything will be fine.
Or like you said, we ourselves sometimes lose control of gambling excessively, but we ourselves can advise friends or other people not to gamble excessively. That's hypocritical but not unusual, and I don't think it's just in gambling, but in other things as well.

That is just it, it is good to be honest. One thing that the OP is experiencing that I noticed is that he is losing more than winning and that is enough to tell friends also to know that they should be careful while gambling and that they should have discipline for them not to lose too much while gambling. There should be no reason to lie and thinking you are helping when you are losing which is a lesson.

Sometimes this type of behavior is often seen where someone presents himself as not being an addicted gambler and is a fairly prudent gambler. But his character is not real. I don't understand the point of doing such a thing but I can assume that the gambler can identify himself as a responsible gambler to his friends. It can be done to show him that he can control any situation. But I didn't do any behavior where I had to pretend to be good. But I don't blame those who act like this to help their friends, because they are trying to bring others back. Because some gamblers are so addicted to gambling that it is difficult to get them back from that position. If such behavior can improve a gambler from gambling it is no less.

Sure. I avoid talking with them about betting opportunities, or big wins. I might mention losses to encourage them. Just like with a friend who is sober, i don't invite them to bars if they don't want to, i won't offer them a loan if they need it for beer, and i don't talk how fun we had last night. I only talk about hangovers and lost money, if i need to talk about that subject. Because i know quitting anything you are addicted to is hard. When i quitted smoking i avoided bars for a year. And few times when i went into them during that year, i felt isolated and alone when everyone went for smoke.

No one wants to feel seperate and left alone in a conversation, especially when they are struggling to avoid the thing.
Eventually you can go back to talking about gambling, but only after someone is clearly changed their routines, have their financial issues in control and are not tempted anymore. When they can handle it, it can actually make them stronger, when they know they can handle it.

Isn't that how masking and lying to your friends is? It's trying to show that you don't trust them that they can control themselves. We all know the problems that gambling causes like addiction, depression, and financial issues. It's going to be a task that everyone should accept.

You must be honest with yourself so that the people around you are honest too. Don't let yourselves get tempted and ensure you are taking note of your achievements.

I don't have any bad gambling habits that I wouldn't want anyone to copy, and even if I do, the best reason I'm fighting that demon is to advise others not to get involved in them.
 
So what you did to hide your bad gambling behaviour is the right thing to do. It's better to show them you are not into it than for you to show them your weak part, which they can take as discouragement. Like, what's the point of trying to fight my gambling habit when there is someone like us who is not even bothered?

I used to gamble with money that I couldn't afford to lose I used to chase my losses and I used to take a loan just to gamble these are the traits that you don't want your friends or relatives to experience and you can effectively advise them if it's coming from your experience, so its better to be honest and transparent.

Why would you hold out when it's already in the past and since we experienced how it feels, it's just ok to share your experiences and your bad times in gambling so they will avoid these pitfalls.

Your parents principles are gold. That was them instilling in you moral uprightness from childhood. There are many different variants of this principle that you were taught. The lesson is empathy. If you put yourself in their shoes, you will not want to them to "celebrate" while you are feeling bad from your loss.

My respect for my friends will increase if they are honest and open with me instead of acting like the Messiah. So also should he do. Sharing these experiences helps because the more they are bottled in the more damage it does and it will grow worse.

I think everyone addicted to gambling today has the level or degree of their gambling as well as their level of self-control which mostly works with the psychological stamina of the person together with the environmental effects. The degree at which someone gets more or less addicted to gambling and the level at which they are able to control it can be as a result of their psychological stamina and environmental factors. You probably have been able to stick more to your gambling schedules, budgets and plans because of your level of psychological stamina which could be stronger than your friends who cannot control themselves. Despite your control level, you still have periods where you don't meet up with your plans and go against your boundaries, this could be as a result of the environment you are. Now, if you can introspect about all of these two characteristics by exercising your mental stamina as well as changing your environment, you could be able to tackle the addiction almost completely if not all. This is the same approach you should take towards advising your friends and relatives who have gone astray in their gambling lifestyles.

We are not a gambler if we do not experience negative traits, and we don't want to experience these negative traits, so it's just ok to share advice on these negative traits that your friends don't want to experience.

It's ok to be honest it's your friend and your friend or relative will be glad that you shared your experience so they will not get astray, sharing is caring especially for people you care for.

Such method works but requires lots of time to heal the addicts, because they won't notice your strategies immediately. Although it works, because, have been around addicted people, not gambling, I tend not to discuss or do those things relating to their addiction in their presence. Because, it could make them feel like I'm in same boat with them, such things I've noticed doesn't work rapidly fast. Sticking to this method shouldn't be the only approach towards helping this people. Having effective conversations with them while exhibiting this attitude is quite very helpful.

But you'll have to exercise patience while they adjust towards your own gambling lifestyle. The whole thing depends on the person's will power, how able he is to change his behavior. Other than that whatever we do on their behalf is to be a good example. When the addict thinks of us he could ask himself why be can't behave like his friend. The changes begins the moment be begin to seek for help, on how he could limit his gambling lifestyle and behave like you. It's a good thing, but make sure it doesn't affect you in the process, because as you said it's a disguise that means in their absence you gamble differently.

Parents will always claim to be saints before their children because they don't want the children to exhibit any negative behavior they engage in. Mentors will also want to showcase themselves as superhumans because they want their mentees to always believe them. It is common to lie because it looks like the best way to advise or motivate somebody.

I try as much as possible not to lie to people because I want to look superior. I tell people about my struggle and show them the steps I am taking to overcome it. I can hide some negative behavior from a child but pretending before fellow gamblers that I am not having problems with my gambling budget, when it is a lie is self deception and I wouldn't consider it. You might even get help from others if you expose your own problems. One can help someone who has having gambling disorder without exhibiting a Superman personality.

There's this principle I learned from my parents; they used to tell me that if someone is winning in any form of competition, it's not right to praise or announce your success when your friends are not part of the success. For example, if Mr. P places a bet with his friends and his friends end up losing their bets while Mr. P's is successful, it's not wise for Mr. P to start announcing his huge win in the presence of his friends, who are still feeling unhappy about their loss. 

I have been in a situation where my friend felt so bad for the amount of money they lost, but my own prediction was successful, and I won a little significant amount, so I felt bad for my friend's loss, and I could not share my own successful story with them because they would have felt so unhappy and perhaps disheartened toward my win. 

If that friend or family relative has gone to far I am glad to hide my real identity and to advice them to stop,in fact it has been long enough I only gamble online and except my wife no one knows I gamble,so in the eyes of the world I am a clean regular guy who happen to go to do his job and go to church on Sundays.I would think that when someone really goes ashtray in such a way because of gambling and it looks like they are having difficulties coming back I would definitely love to help them and bring them real advice from my experience without telling them that I gamble but telling them that I worked in a casino before,in fact many years ago I worked in a small lotto club that had some slots and there I learned gambling,so as I said I am definitely pro helping.

I mean, you could do whatever you link, bring out advices to people when you think they need them and all that shit, but you have to remember that the only person you're really fooling in this situation is yourself. You know for a fact that you go overboard and that you are in no way "a responsible gambler", and yet you go out there thinking you're the perfect example to your friends of how you should really gamble.

Nothing wrong about it if your friends end up switching their lifestyles and going for a healthier approach at gambling, but at the end of the day you better be ready for the consequences and the ensuing distrust and clowning once they find out you're not really who you're painting yourself to be. Perhaps a good change of approach is actively assist them in how to achieve a more responsible gambling attitude, so you don't end up looking like the fraud you are to these people and you're also learning how to be responsible as a gambler yourself. Hitting two birds with one stone so to speak.

If you need information and resources on how to do so this forum is a treasure trove of that. Just pick which ones work for your situation and you should be good to go.

on average, gamblers are hypocritical people, because usually what they say is sometimes the opposite of what actually happens, because i have also been like that where i have gambled beyond my means but i advised my friends not to gamble excessively. but even so, sometimes there are words that we need to sweeten to be able to give advice to others, even though it seems like hypocrisy, but they are the most appropriate words at that time and we don't need to think too much about it because of that just ordinary advice.

I don't have, I don't advice that I don't do and not happening on me. But if it's a situational talk, probably it's a good thing to advise to our friends that are in danger or bad situation that they're going that far with their gambling addiction. In my opinion, all of us have this side that we tend to be good talkers and advisers but then deep inside, we've got something that others don't know about us.
So, if you're that type of person that hides things towards other people about your gambling mentality. Is it a big deal? I don't think so, there's no need to be guilty about it and if you're just trying to help other people with your experiences and advises, it doesn't matter but if that person you're advicing starts to ask you if you're also a follower of your advice, then you have to be honest on them whether you or not.
Because there is this bias from other people that they only listen to people that are reputable and true to their words not just an all talk and cheap talk guy or gambler but does things on their own and can prove that they're following their advises to the other people.

It is totally normal to have times when you don't stick with your plan. We are humans and not some programmed robots. You should not feel bad about it. Tell your friends the reality of your struggles. We struggle with it too but it is the daily discipline and self control that sets us apart.

My own is that, sometimes I once a week or twice in a month, I bet more than more than I can afford to lose. On some days it favors me while on some weeks , the house wins.

When I was so addicted, I still tell my friends to be very careful and not waste money. But they know that I was losing money to gambling, especially the friends that are very close to me.

I did not hide it but it would be good if you hide it and tell your friend to gamble responsibly. You also need to stop even as it is not affecting you financially. Set a gambling budget and make sure you do not spend more than it.

I beg a pardon if a thread like this has existed here.

I have been around my gambling friends and I have always acted to be 100% sticking to my gambling budgets such as how many times, a specific time and how much to spend on my gambling.
Once awhile I actually breaks that budget but though it does not affect my daily life and my bankrolls.
I literally claim this righteousness on my friends who are running out of their emotional control from gambling and psychologically I expects them to have me as an example whom they should emulate from in other to be recalled and take back control of their emotions while gambling.

Does any of you guys have any negative side of gambling habit in you which literally you advices anyone not to exhibit it?
Or can you afford to hide your real disreputable gambling life just to help an astray gambling friend or relative?