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Topic: Choosing and enforcing careers on others should be discouraged (Read 135 times)

hero member
Activity: 966
Merit: 620
 I agree with the @boss for wetin him tok and that nah true. I remember when I tell my parents wetin I like to do and the question wey come my way na "is that marketable?" I weak becos nah beta question be that but then again because of ay we wan dey "marketable" our parents dey force us to take those ones wey dem feel say dey reputable but dey usually forget say wetin work for A no go work for B. Sometimes e dey bad say them go regard am as rebellion if we no do the one them want and something I don see for this life nah sometimes that one wey dem want the child to do no be the one wey dem go use survive.
sr. member
Activity: 476
Merit: 276
Choosing careers is one of things people in this part of the world normally do for their children, the truth is that most parents would prefer there child to study what they wish for him and even when the child is not okay with it they will force him, so that's why a child that's being forced to study what he doesn't have passion for could hardly do well while studying the course, we no that every parents wants the best for there children but they should give them the chance or privilege to choose what they feel is more better or suitable for them, during my school days I had someone like that whom was forced to study mechanical engineering when his passion was management so it was very difficult for him to cope were as the calculations he was always scared of has found him with even more dipper calculations so he couldn't meet up and had to drop out.
legendary
Activity: 2408
Merit: 4282
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The only pain I had after my encounter with him was that he told me all these in high confidence and pleaded that I don't tell the father about his business. He stated that his parents are unrepentant dictators which pushed him into doing what was his passion secretly. He stressed that they wouldn't waste time in closing down his business if aware of it.

The number one problem with our parents na say dem dey use old days eye look us, dey want what's best for us genuinely but dem dey do am in a wrong way. Time dun pass wey parents supposed dey force their children to do what they want for them because dey believe that it'll give them a good future, now dem suppose dey allow us walk our own path but they should be there to guide us not force us to fulfill their own dreams. Wetin you narrate here na wetin many people dey surfer so. E dey like me I like entertainment from the beginning but I no get the opportunity to do am because course wey I go study na wetin my papa dey work and na wetin my papa dey do him say him son go do or anything wey relate to am. I regretted studying within I graduated with and na same story for many Nigerians.

Quote
  • should I let the father know about his business?
  • should I keep pushing this boy in the line of tech as requested by his father?
  • would this boy ever find happiness again if telling his father validated his fears and his business closed?
  • what its the best solution to this issue that will reconcile the boy's passion and his fathers decision?

Yes, let the father know, but allow the guy to follow him dream, no follow among those wey dey kill young boys dreams by discouraging him. He'll change the world when he's doing something he has interest in and love then when he's doing it for only money which is why his father is trying to force him to go into tech because we know say money dey that side.

No, allow the boy to choose his own path, everybody no go make am for teach, he might just become a better business man and make billions from there, money can be made from different interest and not just the interest that's trending now or seem to be outdated.

Speak with the father, enlightened him, show am example of people wey dun follow their dreams and make am. Show am people wey dey the business area wey the guy wan go. Make the father see reasons say no be every tech guy dey make money and no be every business man dey sell for mile something market (make am see say you fit do business and become successful).
member
Activity: 96
Merit: 13
It quite logical that in life, anything that is being force on someone, you can't get the best out of him or her even though the person is good, do you know that there are days you will be tired and you will feel like not getting out of bed, in such situation it's only when you are doing what you love you will feel motivated to get up, but if it not your passion, you wouldn't get up.

So it very wrong to force a career on someone, no matter how that person try, he wouldn't be altra good as something that comes within.
sr. member
Activity: 336
Merit: 365
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It's no longer a thing that is common in our society children now take their future to their own hands. I guess back then, parents forced their children into studying what they think would be the best for their future. As we all know, in Nigeria there are just few course in universities one can study to have a chance of employment in the country.
If as a considerate parent, your child has a field he loves so much. You should care more about his own interests and not yours. Forcing them to study a course they don't like would reduce their chance of good performance in the future. I have also heard of some kids that were forced by their parents and managed to graduate on that field of study. because of their dream course they actually go bad to further gain a degree in their interested field line.

As regards your question bro,
I still think you should alert his father about his son's decision or rather request the boy to tell his father so blames won't come falling back at you when things goes wrong. He father won't kill him of course but may dislike his decision. It now up to the boy to prove to his dad that making that choice wasn't a mistake.
sr. member
Activity: 420
Merit: 253
Well choosing a career or course for people is not really a good idea as they might find it difficult to adapt in the field contrary to what they wanna study.

Although if it is a case of applying for a course and you given another course to study I will advise you should accept it and find a way to cope with it and as time goes on you will adapt to it. I applied for a course in UNIPORT 2011 and I was given another course to study I just pick up the course and started studying and I graduated with the course and still went back to study my dream course.

But choosing a course for someone is not a good Idea at all as any challenge they encounter while trying to be familiarize with the course will have you to be blamed so it is advisable to allow them chose what they wanna study except is someone that don't know a course to study but you can only suggest for them not to persuade them
sr. member
Activity: 490
Merit: 346
Let love lead
I had this student whom was learning data analysis. He started very well, but along the line, his interest started dwindling gradually and as time went on it was very obvious. I contacted him on regular basis noting his sudden lack of seriousness, but to no avail. This disintegrated more to him not attending classes and losing interest totally. He was constantly making excuses that he was attending to some family issues and or taking Care of his father's business. This continued until we contacted his father and laid a complaint to him. The father  sought records to ascertain his son's level of involvement and progress and to his disappointment, there wasn't much progress to show. He also denied engaging the boy in any business activity. I took special interest in the case and fixed a meeting with the boy. It was only then that l learned that the boy was more interested in being a businessman than a tech guy. He told me that he was coerced into learning tech and that his passion was not aligning with the whole tech thing. I was surprised to learn that he already had his own business which he was setting up and nurturing at the same time he was being absent in tech classes.
Honestly, I was partially impressed and at the same time, not fully convinced in his story and I rescheduled another meeting with him to hear more details. On the meeting day, I queried him why he didn't pull out of the training early enough and ended up wasting valuable resources invested in his training. He blamed it on his  parents not seeking his opinion before registering him for the course and that he was forced into the whole thing. I inquired more about his business. Lo and behold!, this boy swept me off my feet with his vast knowledge in the business of automobiles spare parts. I couldn't help it but turn my anger towards him to admiration as he spoke effortlessly describing all the processes of acquiring the goods. How to know quality goods, assembling them, transporting them, arranging and even  selling them as well as the profits from each unit of sales. This boy practically schooled me in the business he has passion for.
The only pain I had after my encounter with him was that he told me all these in high confidence and pleaded that I don't tell the father about his business. He stated that his parents are unrepentant dictators which pushed him into doing what was his passion secretly. He stressed that they wouldn't waste time in closing down his business if aware of it.
I wept silently because his parents were blinded by autocracy and failed to discover the genius that lay in this very boy. I strongly believe that parents should refrain from choosing careers for their children talkless of enforcing it without first studying their wards passion and abilities. They should support them in being the very best in their career of choice because passion drives excellence.
Now the big questions are:
  • should I let the father know about his business?
  • should I keep pushing this boy in the line of tech as requested by his father?
  • would this boy ever find happiness again if telling his father validated his fears and his business closed?
  • what its the best solution to this issue that will reconcile the boy's passion and his fathers decision?
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