Topic: Do you have this practice of gambling during one's wake (Read 647 times)

Actually, some people have done this illegally before. But, they will make it look legal in a hardcore way. How? They will take advantage of the less fortunate (poor) families of the deceased to extend the wake they will bite this kind of trick because they need the donation to pay the bills for the burial grounds and other payments.
Others are actually renting dead people so that they continue their gambling activities and there is news that these schemes are being raided by the police because there's really no permit for it although it looks legal outside.
I've lived in the streets and I knew a place before where the gambling game "Sakla" happens every day although it's been a week or more. Most of the time the dead should only be there for a week, but there are times that it takes months and the gamblers are still going there.
Sad but true. Those in these types of businesses are taking advantage of it just because it will look legal and the police would not even look for permits until maybe someone tells them what is happening.

This is well known in some countries in Southeast Asia part, Gambling is legal in our country and much legal if there's a funeral because some baranggay officials allowed them to do that especially if the funeral is held inside the house only, unlike private funeral houses where only limited people can go and there is no place for people who want to gamble. Believe it or not, it's normal to do it here in our area, because having gamblers at a funeral also helps because when they win, they donate their winnings to the dead, that's what's called "tong" and that money will help the family of the deceased, it can be used for burial or additional expenses for reading or praying.

I don't know such a tradition exists, in my country, gambling is extremely free and you'll only hear advises like gamble responsibly and others. Its interesting hearing of the practice in your own country, but I'm sure people play with VPN because there are no country without active gamblers, only that they do it undercover.

In my country, you can engage in offline and online gambling without any restrictions that people even go to the extent of taking it as their full time job. No matter how hard you try to convince those addicts to gamble responsibly, it doesn't yield fruit because they're stuck in it. I wish some of them existed in your country, maybe the story would've been different

This kind of culture isn't a thing where I'm from - Based on my knowledge, I haven't seen or heard of such a culture; this is actually my first time. haha. Even though gambling is accepted and legal in my country,  I think you might even get sanctioned by the community if you do such as it would seem very disrespectful to the dead and probably, the culture. Except they (the deceased), family or culture requested it, it's a no-no.  But since it is a culture elsewhere, I can't condemn it although I am quite fascinated that such things like these are available elsewhere in people's culture.  

Gambling is not legal in my country so most of the gambling activities in my country are online based. However, those gamblers who participate in offline gambling mainly participate in gambling activities under the cover of social laws and police systems. So it is not possible to practice gambling even if there is an absolute desire. Certainly not more likely in my case because I don't really participate in any other item outside of Sportsbetting so I usually don't need to prepare or practice for Sportsbetting.

Haven't heard of this as it's my first time and it's sounds interesting going by the motive of the organization of such gambling games under the wake. I hope people don't get too excited to wish for more of these wake's because the more the wakes the more loved ones that are lost to death.

On the bright side, the initiative acts as a succor of relief to some of the financial burden surrounding burial rites and it also  while under the wake help reduce the grieve of the bereaves as they have people around to play with and forget their sorrows with some euphoria that's lifting from the shock of the loss.

Very strange, and maybe this is the first time I've heard of a ritual like this. I consider this unusual, but each region has different characteristics, and socio-cultural, so I don't blame this, especially since this is related to traditions passed down from generation to generation. So we as lay people need to respect all these differences.

However, because some regions and many communities have a bad view of gambling, the general public may think that rituals like this are unusual and quite contrary to existing norms.
And will such rituals continue? Yes, I think that when this has been done for generations, of course this uniqueness will always be maintained from generation to generation, this will continue but will only develop in that scope. Because of this, with many people having bad views about gambling, it will be quite difficult for traditions or culture like this to be accepted by the outside community. And if the reason is "because there is a family who needs to cover the costs of the remaining family" I think this is an illogical reason, because when someone sympathizes and cares enough about the family left behind, then he will immediately give the money he has without additionally you have to play gambling first.

I just heard this because maybe I currently live where gambling is still a taboo, even for some reason in some areas it is still limited and even prohibited so that for gambling licenses with family it will definitely be very difficult to happen because of what exists. This will actually create new problems for those of us who really want to gamble.

However, for some games such as card games still occur and can be done as long as there is no bet in it because it is only used for fun and strengthening the relationship so that there is no element of gambling in it, but this is also not done every day because there are several situations and conditions that sometimes do not allow it and can only be used when there is time to relax and gather with the extended family, maybe something like this can happen.

Most of the cultures have different rituals and traditions during or after someone's wake. To the other nations, that's a disrespectful thing to do when you're going to ask the relatives to have some table there to play poker cards and have some bets. I think it will be understandable if it's just for fun and there are no bets at all. But if it's going to be done in the form of real gambling during someone's wake, the family might feel disrespected about it. Otherwise, if the dead is a known gambler then they would allow that to pass on his legacy and remember him like what he's done and hobbies when he's still alive.

You are absolutely right, these things tend to be very expensive, now there are many plans that I have seen on TV where insurance is paid for this type of event, where they basically offer the entire funeral service, so in view of these things we can draw the conclusion that things have to be previously planned, the person when  is die is over for that person everything , but the problem that the family faces, not only the pain, but the spend that comes at them, is a strong point, but You have to face it as you say, I remember that when the covid pandemic was going on, it wasn't even worth it to bury the dead, but rather burn them, of course it's something else, but it affects it in the same way.

That is why it is striking that in some countries they see poker tournaments as a way to raise funds to cover funeral expenses, it is not a bad idea.

actually I've only very difficult to understand exactly what you are saying but what I want to tell you is that dumbbelling is different than and you cannot compare it with what you see but is not involving so therefore I believe that you have to know that's gambling is different if from your explanation but let me not go into this again what you give is explanation of another thing that does not relate with the gambling naturally but only accepted the fact of your theory

In third world countries things work the same way, anyone who is a government employee has their salary deducted for death expenses, in the private sector they also deduct their salary for death expenses, now when people are not government employees or from a private company but there is some business so these people must go to health, death and other insurance companies and pay the death insurance, that way when the person dies the insurance will be activated and all death expenses will be paid . Unfortunately, there are many people who do not have a job and do not have businesses, so these people do not pay for this insurance

and when they die, relatives and friends contribute money and pay bills related to death expenses. It's a very sad scenario and this is something that more than 50% of people from third world countries have suffered and I very much doubt this situation will be resolved anytime soon, because with the corrupt and incompetent governments that third world countries like mine has been, the level of development is very slow, unemployment has only increased a lot. In the places where the ceremonies to say goodbye to the deceased are held, people's sad faces are very visible. In my country, it's like that, in places where the dead are, there is no joy and rightly so, why would anyone go and play when someone died? does not make sense

Even as small as €2000 seems, it is still quite a large amount or sum of money here in my country, most especially when converted to our local currency, Its more than enough to condult a moderate burial ceremony, I can tell you for sure that when my dad died, we did not spend up to $1000 for the burial (note I used dollars here not euro, and also note that euro is more expensive than the dollar here in my country).

So, I honestly don't know for sure how other parts of the world go about burial ceremonies of their loved ones, but then, this whole idea of gambling to raise money for burial ceremony still sounds weirld as f**k to me.

Yeah, I've never known gambling to be something or an activity someone who is morning the death of their loved one will want to engage in, gambling is an activity that ordinarily should make people merry, that is; happy, not an activity suitable for a gathering of a death of someone.

But then again, Ive never been out of my country, I don't know how other nations around the world consider or treat the death of a person.

I am not used to such a gambling practice as i have not seen it before happen in my country, but i believe In this kind of gambling practice, there are still chances that the family might lose or raise very small amount of money which still still renders the effort made fruitless. In my country,  people rather raise funds for the family by conducting a fundraising on the day of the funeral or maybe few days to the funeral where friends and well wishers raise money for the bereaved family.

Organising some kind of gambling  during the wake of a funeral will be necessary if it is seen as a means of entertaining the people and create an exciting atmosphere even in the midst of sorrow. Aside this, there are lots of ways to raise funds for a bereaved family without necessarily raising them through gambling.

I guess that's the problem in third world countries because I've been living in a few European countries and you get these expenses covered by social security. There's a special fund that if the person had paid their social security, will pay out a certain amount of money, usually close to 2k EUR. It may not cover the whole cost, but it will help you with the most important things like cost of cremation or coffin, transport and preparation of the body and all that.

I've never heard of that. None of the people I know gamble to raise money for funeral and gambling is not something we do when a person dies. Gambling is treated like meeting with people to play video games, you don't do that to commemorate someone, but rather to laugh and have fun.

I dont know if this one is already that offered on some countries but there's already having those life plans or something that connects out about when you die there's already that having funeral plans or in correlation
to this on which you would really be having no problems when it comes to funeral arrangement or something which the family of the affected ones wont really be having that kind of hardship on expense.
Talking about practically on which the thing you've said is really that actually true on which it is really that indeed too costly i must say. From coffin until those burial then it wont really be that coming cheap.
This is why it would really be understandable that to those families who are sitting on those middle standard or status to poor would be struggling into this situation.

No one really knows on when to die and this is where these kind of plans would really be relevant. It might sound that too bad in our ears but talking practically then this one is really
that something that you could really be able to prepare on.

Funeral costs are very high almost like in all countries, sometimes people do not have enough money to pay these expenses, that is why it has become very fashionable to do so-called cremations, which are generally somewhat cheaper, but it is not It is bad to do certain activities if you want to raise funds for these expenses, generally where I live some people resort to holding "raffles", whether for cars, motorcycles, many things, the truth is I had not considered it. Poker tournaments could be organized, it is something new where I live, because generally things with gambling where I live have not expressed that taste, although they are very exciting things, but it would be a matter of seeing if it gives good results, then it doesn't matter, that can work, the idea is to be able to have enough funds to Covering those expenses is not bad.

Gambling will always attract the attention of many people, but if you organize something like this you have to be very careful, even in the event that a problem arises, as money is very delicate, fights can occur.

On the other hand, there is indeed a chance to get a win or a big win, which is called a jackpot, but of course this will not happen as we expect. Moreover, we must be aware that gambling will not completely end in victory, if we gamble often, what will happen more often is defeat, not victory, because of course the superiority factor of the host is certain, they will be difficult to beat because they It is the host who created all this and they have also arranged it in such a way that what they plan can produce profits including winning.
We should gamble with the money we can afford, don't gamble beyond our financial capabilities. forcing yourself into gambling is also not recommended, because most likely it will only ruin your life financially. It's true what you said, we have to be able to control ourselves so we don't gamble excessively, because excessive gambling will only make us miserable.

I think the so-called tong won't be enough to support the family who are left by those who died if he is a husband or father who only works in the family but they can be good already to buy a snack that will be offered to those who play gambling during the mourn. You said those who does this already seek permission from the authorities?

So, definitely it's also legal if done in other countries but I think not all countries are doing this, especially the richer ones as they can already afford the snack and other expenses when they have a family member who have died. When there is a tong involved, the games must be true and not for fun only but playing during these events are no doubt more fun because relatives from from far places are gathering and we can as well see lots of different faces in the area.

This is such an interesting cultural rite! I think it's wonderful that there is a means to assist families during such a tough time. It appears to be a financial assistance for the family as well as a sense of community and connection during an agonizing time. And the fact that there are friendly games involved appears to be a welcome distraction during a sad period.

I believe that the sense of connection and connection that this custom provides can be quite beneficial to those who are grieving. Losing a loved one can be extremely isolating, making it difficult to know how to seek assistance. Having a structured event like this could provide an opportunity for people to come together and share their grief, which could be really healing. And the friendly games could provide a sense of normalcy and distraction from the pain of loss.

If many gamblers know about that and consider gambling is just for having fun and not the main source of income, they will not try to playing gambling too hard because that will not makes them have a chance to win much money. If they can do that, they will just having fun and not thinks about win or lose because they knows that gambling is not gives the opportunity to makes money. Many people already experiences big losses so we must prevents that happens to us by always limits our gambling activity and knowing how much money we must used. If we can takes care ourselves when playing gambling, we will gets the fun of playing gambling and not thinking about making money from gambling. The house will takes the biggest profit from the gamblers because that's their business and they can gets the profit easily than the gamblers. It is why we must used self-control to prevent the big losses and still have a chance to having fun from playing gambling.

When it comes to this kind of approach on where making some gambling cards game or having that tong for the sake of increasing it for the benefit of the bereaved family then it would really be that
a nice idea but just like been said by others that if you are really that tending to make some donation then it would be made out directly and this is something on which it would really be
possible if  you are really that tending to make donations for the affected family. As for personal approach then it would be better that you should be that having that kind of consideration in speaking
if you are really that tending to help. When it comes to culture then each country does have that different culture. I dont see these things on other countries.

I'm sure the person who died was the head of the family who has the main role as the person who earns a living to support all his family, but this method or practice seems a bit strange. How can we really make money in gambling to help support the family that has been left behind while the outcome of gambling is always about uncertainty and in addition there is the risk of losing your money at any time without you expecting it.

Honestly I've only heard of this tradition because in my place it's really unheard of when someone dies, and usually the situation is full of grief which makes us have to really maintain manners and ethics to others especially the family left behind when in a sad situation like that, in our place gambling has a pretty negative viewpoint overall and it makes it impossible for me to do things that tend to lead to gambling activities when in a sad situation, but yes every country or place has its own traditions and customs and we have to respect them.

I agree with you, indeed gambling is something that is just for fun, now if gambling is made the main source of income then what will happen is a big problem. where finances will become a mess and it can destroy our lives. Some people who experience big losses are likely people who gamble with the aim of making money, so that when they win they are not only happy, but they are also more confident in gambling which can provide bigger wins.
I think it is almost impossible for gambling to be used as a means of raising funds, but I don't know exactly how, that's just my own opinion. because as far as I know, those who own casinos also aim to make profits and gains for themselves or to develop their gambling to make it even bigger.

i never heard of this practice before, but with the way of explanation on how this is being played and intended for, its a game that is good and at least have a possible ideal way of helping the family of the bereaved left behind, but i don't know if the process in playing the card colours has anything to do with winning or not in other for the family to receive the benefits and
 to play such, also if any random relative or friends can join in playing such, or only the family are permitted to play such

Yeah, this is part of our tradition already in our country and it is to help the family raised money to help in the expense. Not sure if this is just unique for Filipinos or when it did start. And the usual card games, to keep us awake and I think this is my early exposure to gambling itself as anyone can watch the games even if you are still very young.

@Crypt0Gore - we don't view it that way, perhaps it's just a way to what the OP said, the winner of let's say lucky 9 (a form of baccarat that is well known in our country and usually one of the games that we played in the wake), will give part of his winnings we call it tong) to the families to help cover the burial expenses or anything.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Philippines/comments/2tu4nf/why_does_the_funerals_here_at_the_philippines/

I believe this is from the Philippines. The gambling part is not really necessary, it’s just a way of people being sympathetic to the deceased by entertaining themselves in the form of gambling then give the commission every game to the family.

But anyone can give financial support directly to the deceased family without doing any gambling. Since wake is done here during night until dawn, people want something to wake them while they are still the deceased. This way the deceased family feels support from many people for being there until morning.

This is something completely new to me and I have never heard of this tradition before. Every country or region has different cultures and traditions for anything they do, in the region where I live, we don't do such things but it is just that friends and relatives of the family come and stay with them for a few days and take care of expenses and stuff while the family is mourning just to give them some relief from other tensions while they are already in extreme grief.

I'm hearing for the first time that to support the family of the deceased, the friends and families or people that come to the wake gamble while they are together to collect gambling fees to support the family, sounds very kind and sympathetic to me.

Wake keeping should be a silent moment filled with prayers to send off the deceased to a better place but traditions can't be the same, some prefer to make noises and dancing, but for some it's a mourning moment where families and friends gathered to talk about the good things that the deceased have done in his life.

Gambling doesn't make sense to me on such days, I feel like it's wrong, since the day that I was born I have never heard about this before, maybe some countries are doing this? I would like to know.

For my people this feels very wrong, I've never seen such happen and it will never happen because all the tribes in my country don't do such thing, it doesn't give value to the deceased, in short it looks like a lack of respect for the dead, maybe I am wrong, what is wrong in a country can be right in another.

This one is very familiar to me because here in my country, especially in province. when there's a burial, automatically there is also a place called "Saklaan", wherein there is a tent area outside the house and all the gamblers are stationed there, people often do this to help the financial needs of the families of the deceased and so that the family can use something for the the deceased burial. This has become a tradition in our country, especially when the deceased person is at home and it is legal that's why many people come to gamble, even young people play there and they really make the most of the day when there is something like this.

Of course, those are the two main reasons that make it alien to you but if you peradventure visited a place where you were able to witness such, you will most certainly do it to encourage the bereaved, well, at least me. But when you are not in the same country, you may not see such, and even if you are in the same country, the locality/community you are in matters. Just like in my country, the division is many because we have over 170 tribes in just a country. So, what they are doing in the North and East of the country could be so strange to me, but in my place, we do not have any unusual practices that can be strange to them.

Even in the East and North, many communities still have their strange practices that their fellow Easterners would not just know of, that's how deep it is. The world is large, and we should expect strange traditions like this when we are far from home.

Immediately I first saw this post last month, I knew it would be done in the Asian part of the world, and when people replied to my first post, they stated that the tradition "Tong" is commonly practised in the Philippines, which made my suspicions right. Strangest practices are happening in the Asian part of the world, so brace yourself when you visit such a place.

It would be something that will be beneficial indeed and for those people who do tend to do gambling just to have that tong becomes bigger then it wont really be that a huge problem
but if you are really that not a gambler then you could just simply just give out money to the said family that had been affected on which it is more viable rather than on making yourself
pushed through on playing gambling even if you dont know on how to gamble but if you are someone who do love to enjoy at the same time you are helping
the family then it would be your choice.

Wake keeping in some places is a time of morning regardless of the age of the deceased,  and for that games which is a fun activities will not be entertained in such a situation and such no one will bring such idea of playing games at all,  and that is why,  this kind of games are not popular in most of the world,  and since gambling is fundamentally for fun and not money generation,  so whatever the aim may be either to raise funds to support or go along with a particular situation it doesn't matter it won't be entertained.


So for that,  there are other ways that they will employ according to the peculiarity of their environment and situations,  so for that, I haven't seen such a situation where gambling is organized as a fundraising means since this practice is not available in my country,  although gambling is legal though.

You're absolutely right,there are some other games that you can use to keep up with friends and not gambling, gambling during wake keeping doesn't make any sense to me either.unlike as you Said that even without the game, that they will still supply the family of the bereaved in other ways, I think you make a good point there. However even the church can support them, that's if the family do go to church, unlike as we do in my church.

The overall idea may not be far from that, raising money to support the bereaved family and that is why it close friends that come together to organise such games or events, this is some form of age-mate meeting and even without the games,  they will still supply the family of the bereaved in other ways.

In this part of the world, that kind of game is not popular but we still have some other activities that are done in the form of such games but not betting anyways,  in in form of friends coming together to raise funds to support the bereaved friend and family.

Although it seems like a good idea to help the family of someone who has passed away by participating in gambling events where the money will be directed towards them, one should always remember that gambling involves a substantial amount of financial risk. Even though you may think it’s an opportunity to contribute something or remember the deceased, the potential negative consequences must not be overlooked.

Moreover, when choosing a place or an event that is not appropriate for this kind of activity, ethical concerns may also be at stake. Participation in gambling can aid and abet injurious or illicit actions in any unlicensed and improperly selected places. Otherwise, many other means exist through which to support such families without involving gambling as the only viable option, including direct donation or moral and psychological help.

While it may be true that you have good intentions, it is equally essential to think about the potential outcome of taking part in gambling activities, and also to try other means of helping bereaved families rather than risking financial or moral jeopardy.

They say that the proceeds of the said gambling activity will go towards the family of the dead, so I try and play with other people even though I believe that such a venue is not appropriate for the said activity. I don't overdo it though. I never really stayed there gambling for hours. Perhaps just doing it out of respect to the dead is enough, or just to help them raise money and that's it. It's a weird tradition that legalizes even the illegal forms of gambling during a wake, but if it helps the family then I'm okay with it.

Rather in some other countries, what is done is to donate to the family or do a contribution to help the family take care of the finance of the burial. Some people buy drinks and other preparatory things, some give cash gift. I have not witnessed gambling at the funeral ground for the sake of generating funds for the bereaved family. Well tradition and culture really differ from region to region.

We are in the same country and one more information about this,

This is legal, however, there are some who abuse and use this tong as their reason to gamble. That's why a lot of people are using this gambling during wake to execute illegal gambling. They set up a fake funeral and play card games, running like a mini-casino where a lot of players are playing different card games at different tables.

Usually it is on Asian countries Ex. Philippines.

In the Philippines, gambling isn’t just a past time, but a way to honor the dead. Betting games, mah jong, and card tables are often set up at Filipino wakes, or paglalamay, where the tradition is to keep a 24-hour vigil over the deceased until the burial.
Source link

Different countries does have that different culture and it is indeed shocking into those who arent aware of this kind of practice
but well it do happens.

This is exactly the same practice in most of the rural communities in Nigeria.... It nothing really different because I think I've experienced this before; the only difference would be that the tong wasn't organized to support the bereaved family... Different people just pulled up with their stands to organize a make-shift gambling kiosk.
Seems you don't even understand what OP meant... WTF is when you wake up? Hahahaha

Sandra 🧑‍🦰

OP, you must be from Asia. Gambling is a part of life in Asian countries much more than it is in other parts of the world. We don't have anything like that here in Europe. All we do is stay close with the family, help them by being there, praying, bringing flowers, sometimes sharing a meal. We don't give them money or gamble to raise money. Mourning is associated with respect and having fun playing games is not really the definition of respect. If you did that they'd say that you don't care and choose to have some fun instead.


It's not about gambling when you wake up A wake is when you mourn after you lose someone close to you. Do you guys even read the post, or just write some random shit based on the way you understand the title? Does your campaign manager really pay you for this pile of crap?

Wow. This is a pretty interesting practice. I haven't heard of it before. If it is comfortable with you, what country is it. I would like to know more about it.

In my country, wake are always quite solemn depending on the age of the person who has passed on. What happens there is more of a religious ceremony where there is a priest, a sermon, and singing of hymns. There are no games, just some good music and dance to celebrate the life of the deceased but his depends on the age of the person who passed on.

Gambling activity during a wake also serves as a way to provide the family with some financial assistance regardless if the family doesn't ask for it. Yes, these people can just give money to the family through donations without doing gambling but when there's an active gambling activity in a wake, it likely can invite other random people to be involved.

More people doing gambling = more chances of money flow for the family

These "other people" who were being lured into gambling at that wake don't even know who's the one being at the wake. They are just there to gamble.

What I think is that each country has its culture and that is something that is respected, in my country the culture is different, if there is a wake, what they do is pray and pray so that the soul of the dead can rest in peace and managed to cleanse oneself well of the sins that the person committed, it is more than all a religious custom, and it is something that is very delicate, I know that in countries like Mexico there is the day of the dead where that is a holiday, But given the situation that is now so difficult and things are so expensive, it is not a bad idea to do something like this to help raise funds for the family. I say this from my own experience, because some time ago my grandfather died and the Funeral expenses were very high, they paid it to his son and I think one of them still owes money.

What surprises me is that they treat a vloroio as almost a celebration, it is difficult to do something like that when there is the pain of a loved one, but it is a matter of seeing things differently, maybe it is better to cope with things like this in the middle of pain.

But part of death is part of life too, we don't know what lies beyond or what will happen to us, so for those who are left, what do they have to bear with the expenses and thus be able to get ahead , but it is a very tradition different, it is very interesting.

This tradition has long been held here in our country the Philippines, there is a crackdown on illegal gambling by the police authorities here in our country, but since it is a tradition, the authorities eventually allow it provided that they only allocate one table for their gambling activity.


This tradition is very popular in the provinces because our provinces are divided by seas it will take days before the arrival of the family to pay their last respect to their departed relatives, it's a past time to keep vigil and to strengthen the ties between relatives who just met during the wake, part of the proceeds will be given to the family as a form of donation.

I don't do the practice when I wake up, and I tend to avoid it. For me, it's unusual, maybe because we have different countries and traditions, and maybe if I were in your country, I would definitely like to do it.

Sometimes, gambling at wakes actually helps out the family financially, like a small safety net during a tough time. Plus, it can bring folks together, like a shared activity that helps them connect and maybe even forget the sadness for a bit. It's like a cultural thing, you know, traditions can be weird like that sometimes.

Of course, there's a flip side. Some folks see it as disrespectful to the deceased or even a way to exploit people who might be struggling with gambling. And hey, different cultures have different views on gambling altogether, so it can be a moral minefield.

So, what's the verdict? It's not a clear-cut good or bad. It's more like a complex situation where you gotta consider different perspectives and find a way to make it work, if at all. Maybe the family agrees to it, everyone plays responsibly, and it becomes a way to both mourn and support each other. But hey, if it feels off, or someone's not comfortable, then maybe it's best to skip the poker chips during the wake.

In my country there is no tradition like this because gambling is prohibited in Indonesia.
But when you know that gambling after waking up has become a tradition in some countries,
it becomes a unique tradition, even if it is not just about gambling, but gathering at the same table with family.

Especially to make donations to families who are grieving financially from the results of gambling done after waking up.

I was surprised by this kind of tradition because it never existed in my country.
And regarding doing gambling with full responsibility, it must be done, this is to avoid the negative effects that will be caused.

I personally do not join or engage during wakes but we have the common tradition and I think we are in the same country. Fees or tongs is collected from gambling are donated to the bereaved family financially to help cover funeral expenses or support them. Regardless of the legality, it's still important to gamble responsibly, set budget andavoid excessive gambling

Yeah, it is a tradition and it will be more supported if the dead has been engaged in gambling and knows by the community as a gambler. There's a belief that his soul might even be happier if he/she people gambling on their wake.

But for me, I don't do that on anyone's wake. I am there to chit and chat and have sometime with the bereaved family to discuss matters or just wanna catch up. It is just my way of showing respect to the dead person, I am not against gambling on the wake.

If it's allowed, that's allowed and no one can stop that. As I've said, that's just me and my way of paying respect not just to the dead but also to the family.

I think it's a exellent idea, because there are a lot of countries with very poor people. I see they play "Tong" in the Philippines and it is very popular there.

I did not know that it is played during a "Wake" or "funeral" ... which is good, because it helps the family financially.

Different countries have differents cultures, so the world should accept other people's cultures and respect them.

In my country gambling is legal and there's no further restrictions to how it's been carried out, so if you choose a certain pattern with which you could gamble if it causes no harm to anyone or the society at Large then it's definitely not a problem and you bare at liberty to go ahead to gamble the way you whish, in cases or situation as this, you bare at liberty to give to the bereaved family whatever it is you wish to probably from your gambling proceeds in oder to support the family and there's no restrictions or regulations to that.

Card games are not considered illegal in my country but it shouldn't be a reason why there will be any form of breaking the law or causing disorder which also includes when any bereaved family is involved but if it's a way of reconnecting and keeping family and friends together then there's absolutely nothing wrong with it in my country.

Well, yeah in my country in some places they doesn't allow street gambling unless you will ask for permission to the local authority, for example  there is an event in in the barangay, or city before you can host an gambling games you should ask for permission because if not then it will be considered as illegal, the country I'm residing in doesn't have strict rules about gambling, you just need to comply and ask for permission in order to maintain order in that place and also if anything happens then there should be a person that is responsible for that, it is also implemented so that to avoid those illegal gambling host that can have bad intent to those customers, in short to avoid scammers that could take advantage to those people who will gamble in their hosted gambling. I agree with authorities implementing rules that should be followed to avoid anomalous transactions.

There is no such law in our country but playing cards is considered gambling and has strict restrictions. It's fine if someone plays secretly but if they find out, the police will come. Once here in our house some people were playing cards when the police came in civil dress and arrested them. Bereaved families must find other ways to support. In countries where card playing is allowed, it will be easier to help bereaved friends and relatives

Each country does have their own traditions but i do see this to be somewhat that common or could be seen on other countries as well not only just on Philippines but having this kind of
set up on where there would really be some sort of fee accumulation or thats been called tong or whatever it its, then it would be somewhat be beneficial into the family that had been affected.
Its not bad on applying out such thing because it is really just that for the c=good cause. Gambling or playing cards into these kind of wakes is really that common.
People would really be needing to be aware of such time and doing some gambling thing would really be that common.

Here in our country then this is something that do happens too but not really that much if we do speak into our own family or relatives on which there's no such thing
about having that pot fee or something. The money that been saved or accumulate do comes from to those relatives who do give out such donation or something
like that.

No, in my country it is not allowed to play cards for money. In my country, if there is a wedding parties that lasts for 3 days and 3 nights, usually late at night we play cards until morning while guarding the party location. In the past, things like this were often used as gambling practices and at that time the police were not firm and allowed it, but now it is completely prohibited.

Apart from wedding parties, we also often play cards during night patrols carried out by residents of the housing complex in turn, usually we play cards at the patrol post until the morning. However, we are prohibited from using money, but we often use money secretly

Philippines that's where this tradition is very common.  "Tong" if i'm not mistaken is just a slang word for a small fee when a gambler wins the pot. this fee will generate funds for the wake to keep running til the day of burial.  i'm not really aware of the history of the word but its just what's been called since the time i was aware of it.

when my grandpa died, it took a week of wake that his basement was like a betting house. drinks were served including cervesa and coffee and cookies which these are funded by the "tong".

Tong? I'm afraid it's not practised in my country. This is even the first time I am reading a practice like that. I'm curious though, it would be nice if you could add the name of your country to the OP so that we can at least know where such is being practised. Or better still, the continent you are to have a clue if you do not want to add the name of your country. This practice is worth doing, it's a very good means to cater for the bereaved, at least for a while until they find firm feet again. Of course, in my thought, the rich might go against it, but for those who are poor, it will go a long way to help them.

How I wish I could introduce this in my community as well, but the issue is that I live far from my ancestral home, and to do this in an urban area will take a lot of orientation and resources which I do not have. Well, I wish those who are doing it well. Perhaps one day, the NGOs that have the needed resources can spread it across, being a way to help.

Nonetheless, in my country, we do not just leave the bereaved like that, we drop cash envelopes for them depending on the closeness. This, I believe is similar to "tong. " Though playing games could motivate one to play more against an opponent which could be more money for the bereaved.

I like this tradition because it could at least assist the family in raising small funds that could assist them in covering some expenses. In my country, the wake keep is usually used to share memories about the deceased. It is also a time to sing and dance solemn tones to comfort the family. But the family is also burdened with the responsibility of entertaining the people with food and drinks. But this culture is good because the family will also get some support.

Such cultural events in burials is not targeted at celebrating someone's death, that wil be very unacceptable. But it is a tradition that helps to encourage and make mourners feel less grief. Yes it is meant to be a solemn gathering but it is also a time to meet with relatives and friends and such traditional events makes the place lively. We are mourning doesn't mean that there will be no form of entertainment. In my location burials attract singers and dancers especially if the deceased is old or influential. Like I said before, OP stated that the gambling event I also support the grieving family financially.

This is being practiced in the Philipines and it is a tradition, a way to gather all your friends the best way to do is to play games or gamble for fun they need to have something to do during the wake the whole night, outside of the house there is gambling going on its for the benefit of the family the winner take a share of his winning and share it with the family and they donate it to the family to help shoulder the expenses.
It may look weird to some who do not understand how these things can be possible but every country has its ways of doing things so we should respect the tradition and how they carried it.

Well basically in some places, it's common to play games during funerals to support the grieving family. People contribute a fee to help cover expenses. Whether it's legal depends on local rules and traditions so it's good to keep things in line with what's accepted in your area. In my country, playing games during wakes and pitching in is a common thing and it's called sugalan. It's like a community way to help out the grieving family with expenses

For sure we are living on the same country or not since this kind of approach is something that been traditional mostly on southeast asian countries or i dont know if this one does exist on other countries as well but having this kind of culture on having that "tong" isnt really that bad. Actually when it comes to wake then i do really play out in together with some other relatives and friends. I dont mind much about on how much amount would be pooled as long this one could really be helping out into those family who do have such situation or problem considering that even burial expenses and other correlated things would really be something that would be talking about money. Unless if the said family is rich then they might not really have those tongs or whatsoever in those mourn moments.

Actually its not really that a bad thing to have on which we know that not all families are really that good status when it comes to money on which on the time that they would really be having this kind of conditions then they do take up some loan specially on burial expenses and other things. It might really not that big or depending on how many had been playing but at least those amounts would cover up something when it comes to those small expenses.If you are someone whose really that going into those wake and having that kind of consideration then you could always opt on giving
out directly on the affected family.

You are correct that this is a Spanish term about Head/tail but in the local game they uses 3 same coin so the flipping will be harder as you need to produce 3 same outcome(head/tails) in which sometimes taking long time before the result comes.

And correct maybe this is different from  your culture but in Asia specially in the Philippines ? this mostly taking place specially in poorer community/family that they need to gather extra funds(as it is expensive when someone passes away) so the tip from gamblers are very important in each mourning.

So strange to my knowledge. Is it that the gambling commission or the gambling sites accumulates your lost of stake while gambling and give it back to the gamblers families in returns? Or is it that the gambling extracts someone little funds out from your gambling funded wallet as a form of pension for expanded coverage during your Financial difficulties?
How is this considered being realistic? Although I am not in doubt but curious on the Possibilities.

Not familiar with this, never heard of it before I guess it's my first time and most people from Nigeria too.

here in my country there other cultural activities that happens during the wake but gambling is not one of them. although its peculiar to your country that is why culture is dynamic, but for my country we have different ethnic groups and different activities are conducted in each ethic. I can remember something I noticed while I was very much younger, where after about 4 days after the deceased has been buried the family will gather of a night and kinda stay up all night but I don't know what it is that we really do but I know we just stay discussing and somehow mere till next day.

Perhaps, it's common in some areas or countries but in the other countries, that is uncommon practical or don't have that traditions. I don't know if that is existed here but so far, i never met that traditions. Oh, perhaps I knew something that similar with the story. When someone died, many people comes and not sleep all night long just to sympathize with the family. Usually, they only sit and talk with each others remembering the old days with the person who died. But young people, perhaps 20+ will playing gambling just to pass the time. They do that to show their respect to the family and guard them until the ceremony is finish.

The word "Tong" is familiar to me, do you mean by "our country" here is Indonesia? If the answer is "Yes", I'm Indonesian too and this is the first time I have heard of this tradition, does this have anything to do with a particular religion or tribe?

It makes me confused because in our country gambling is completely prohibited, especially when gambling is done in the real life.

We have something similar to this in my traditions and is lega, but the timing differs from what you explained, in your own case, the game is organized during the mourning time, but mine is an organized game and there used to be time interval from when the bereaved family members approve for the game to be played.


In my region, only close friends of the deceased person will play the game to honor the departure of the friend and sometimes those friends are those in the age grade of the dead person, all bets and wins go to the family and the family has the responsibility to entertain the friend with foods and drinks during the game period of the game, its more or less a game festival for them

Talking about covering of expenses, is it that the wake keep game or gambling is meant to raise money for the bereaved family to sort their bills or what is it for?

This kind of gambling is still new to me and what I know about wake keep and burial is that the family take care of the expenses and the running cost till the days of the burial is over and what support given by friends and well wishers are not mandatory but an act of benevolence, solidarity and conscience.

This is the first time I've heard that there are people who participate in gambling at funerals. Here in my country I don't know if they do this kind of thing because I only went to one funeral, and at the funeral I went to I didn't see this kind of thing, but reading this thread and now that I know that this kind of thing exists , I'm wondering how people can concentrate when they play at a wake, because normally at wakes people are very sad, other people are crying, so I can't see this very sad scenario as being a good scenario to play, I wonder how people people react when they lose, because I really doubt that when they lose they celebrate defeat, so I suppose that when they lose they are sad because they lost money and that sadness of theirs will be seen by other people and as a consequence the sadness will spread

Many people who go to the wake cannot understand what is really happening during the wake, this is because those people who are attending the wake are not the ones who lost someone, which is why they do not understand the pain that is being felt that day. Even if they said that the money collected would be given for the funeral, honestly wouldn't it be easier for people, instead of playing, to take the money and donate it to the family that lost someone? because it seems to me that this would be a better option than people playing games at the wake, because there's no point in laughing during the wake and then crying. Sometimes the best way to solve a problem is to face the problem head on and not hide. If the person is sad, wants to cry at the funeral, then that person should cry and not laugh to pretend that they are fine when they are not fine

Well that's my first time hearing about such thing in the world of gambling. I'm still doing my research about it and from the little I could gather, I really haven't heard of it in my country. If it were that popular, maybe it would be common amongst people in my country. Though it sounds like a nice Initiative to help the bereaved and provide them with little you can through gambling.

But not all countries will accept such practice. If an individual wishes to give money out to the bereaved then he should do it willingly and not through gambling.

I am from the Philippines but my family believes in a peaceful wake. So, my grandfather's wake was held in a chapel where relatives could go and just talk about things, chat, and have some little food.
But I do know about the gambling practices during one's wake which is most of the time held in the streets.
I played both card games and the "sakla" which is one of my favorite games although it's difficult to win because of the broad number of picks. I just love the way the dealer presents the card where there is almost like a drum roll every time he shows the next card. But, I have never seen a color game in a wake, most of the time only those two games, cards and "Sakla" or sometimes they play bingo especially if there are lots of women in the place.
It's understandable especially if the death was a surprise and the family was not prepared for whoever died, it's like a donation but in terms of people gambling in their place. This was a tradition so it will be difficult to just remove it, especially with lots of poor families here in our country.

I am basically familiar with playing cards and I love to play it. Although in our society it is illegal but more preferred to play cards through money in night shelter. I've lost a lot of money getting addicted, but now it's widely known. Generally gambling is a game that gamblers will definitely love to play and has various attractive offers.

This is also very common in my area. You will know eventually that there’s a wake when you see a long table outside the house that is used for gambling. I don’t know actually if the family of the deceased will still ask permission before allowing gambling, because I think gambling is already part of the tradition everytime there is a funeral reception. With that, the family will no longer mind who will watch over the body of the deceased since those close family and friends will be present from night to morning while gambling. I don’t know if other countries adapt the same tradition but if all countries will adapt this, the family of the deceased will be very thankful because the more gamblers will come, the bigger the tong will be which is a very big help already to the family of the wake.

Over here in Greece gambling is considered a serious sin by the church and given that mourning the dead is closely associated with religious practices, there is no tradition to gamble in mourning.

However there is also different cultures for different people. Not everyone is religious, but the issue here is if the deceased person also liked something, then his friends could create an event recreating a schene in his memory to pay respects. I have seen this quite frequently in African American culture for instance.

sorry to assume we have a similar tradition about death. i was just comparing cultures since our countries were under Spanish for centuries and we adopted some of theirs. while we also associate death with sadness and despair, we gamble in the wake for the people who attend the wake will last til morning and at the same time it generates funds for the family.

we do sympathize with the family of the dead. by attending his wake, is enough of a message that a person remembers when he was still alive.

We share same culture probably we are in same country. The only time I participate on this kind of gambling games is on game called “tirimbi” or a version roulette like game but doesn’t have a roulette but rather winner is drawn using piece of paper rolled in the box. The payout system and betting type is just like roulette that’s why I compared it to that game despite without the real roulette involved. This game is played by many at the same time which is why I can place some bet for fun because my identity of betting is not that exposed.

Gambling in our country is not that widely accepted that’s why I never play card games in public like wake of relatives since I will receive criticism from my family or close relatives.

Well, I don't know the part of the world you are from but I think this is the freakiest thing I've read on the internet today.
Now, don't misunderstand or misquote me, I absolutely and completely respect your tradition, but then, also understand that such thing as gambling in a dead person's wake-keeping when the family of such person are morning their lost loved one, would for sure; appear or sound really inhuman for some of us who are not used to such tradition and possibly learning about this for the first time.

And I still find something confusing which I wanna ask, you said this games are played as a way to assist the bereaved family with some the expenses involved with laying their dead to rest, how is this done exactly, is it that the players of this games donate every of their winnings to the bereaved family as a way of supporting them?
Sorry if my question sounds too lame, I completely didn't get that part you said the game are meant to support the morning family, so, I am honestly trying to understand how this is done.

Yeah I just happened to pass by on one's wake with people doing cards, it's pretty normal in our country it's a way to stay awake and bear with the family throughout the whole night and since gambling is legal in my country they do this and part of the profit go to the family, its family tradition, majority of the family have done this and the authorities do not forbid or restrict this tradition.
Although gambling and its legal people are not here to make money but to condole with the family it's part of the tradition that will linger on as long as no law forbids this tradition.

It depends on the culture and the tradition this is normal for us I have stated in this thread that we do this to sympathize and to be with the family for the whole night, it's not like a fiesta celebration we do the gambling outside of the house while the family and those who want to sympathize are are inside the house, we usually have a tent outside of the house this is where people gamble and talks or just want to be in the premises.
But on the day of the burial, everything is solemn and full of sadness and sympathy for the family.
I guess we all have traditions that are very different from other countries when it comes to gambling and how they do it.

I live in Latin America, and it's not a common practice in the country where I live. Actually, I didn't even know people do this kind of thing, so it sounded really strange and uncommon to me, as something inappropriate for a situation where everyone adopts a formal stance towards each other, where people don't joke around, neither speak too loud, express joy or laugh. Wakes are very introspective occasions, where it seems each person reserves their time to reflect deeply and pay tribute silently to the person who has left us. In our culture, and western cultures in general, I think the least thing someone would think in a moment like that would be to gamble.

Death is a taboo in western cultures: a moment of sadness and despair in many cases, while gambling is related to joyness, excitement, leisure and pleasure. Therefore, people don't mix both.

¿Cara y/o Cruz? Are you talking about Spain or Latin America? As I understand, this practice during the wake seems to be more common in Filipinas, Indonesia... but the name of the game you mentioned is in Spanish (isn't it "head or tails", or simply coin flip in English?), so I'm curious where are you writing for.

At least in Spain I have never heard about similar practice during the mourn (I have to confess that, fortunately, I have never been in one) so, as you all said, it seems something more cultural from certain regions than a general practice in different countries.

not sure also whether we have a similar culture with other countries regarding this but probably the Latinos or the Hawaiians.

it's the easiest to learn when you are just 15 years old. a friend died of an overdose, his family owns a pharmacy.
i remember my first table card game at a friend's wake where a crowd surrounds the table while gamblers watch over my cards. those guys are going to look at how good you are at arranging cards in a game called "chikicha". 3 cards as head, then 5 cards as the body, and 5 below. i'm not sure what others call this game though.

Sounds very quaint and traditional, I like the idea of a poker game with all the friends and relatives of the dead as a bonding thing.  Better then most wakes in the west where its always too formal.

I would like to adopt such a tradition or specify it in a will.    The license part is specific to a country we don't have that here but it could be done informally and/or by honor code especially across friends; anything similar here would be charity based or via the Church in some way which has a charity status legally.    This has been done many times but in this case the organization is via community and independent of any one family so quite different I suppose.

This is so familiar to me and I think we are on the same country as well. Common way to gamble during a wake is cara y cruz, card games, mahjong, chess and bingo here in my place. This actually varies from place to place depending on the availability of the games and or the bankers who will initiate the gambling but yeah this is legal in our country.

I don't personally participate with gambling activities during a wake. The practice in my family is to use the moment to have talks with the relatives who are most of the time away. But there are indeed different practices. I even witnessed some families who are having kareoke or singing activities during a wake and for them it is just to make things lively, as their way of reminiscing the one who passed away. But I agree, gambling activities could be a part of a family practice or culture, it just depends on how it will be done or the purpose behind it. Gambling in the first place is an activity for entertainment and the involvement of money just adds intensity and thrill with the outcomes. And with negative impressions, it depends with gambler's intention.  As long as it is legal to what country it is being performed then things would be fine. If gamblers who will practice such activities in any ocassions would be doing it with sense of responsibility, it will be acceptable morally and socially.

I am familiar with this tradition and when I was a kid I do really thought that it is a bad thing and that people should focus more with the mourn and not with activities involving money or gambling to be more specific. As I grow up and learned that it is helping the family in the wake, and yes financially. It also adds "bond" to people who attended the wake in some ways. But there are people who are not having the intention to mourn; they're only visiting the wake because of these activities. Is it a bad thing? Morally, yes however no matter how we look at it, it is indeed legal and with approval from the family of the wake.

Gambling activities are often card games such as poker and a game 'bingo' if others are familiar with it. In my perspective, such activities also help to have people awake over the night to have things on watch, which is just one of the benefit of it. People may view it negatively but culture is behind this.

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.