however if this would mean i can live a month even without thinking about money to pay bills with i'm happy
i'm not the only one here on forum searching for a loan so maybe life isn't so easy after all huh ?
Umm. You would still have to think about money because you'd have to pay the loan back. I suppose this comment goes to show that repayment was certainly your intention if you were (by some miracle) able to get a loan.