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Topic: Seeking $2M USD VC Funding for Genius Cryptocurrency Mining Machines (Read 839 times)

vip
Activity: 1428
Merit: 1145
Is there a line to wait in for these devices?Huh?



Yes, and once the Edison Miners are readied for delivery, we'll be shipping them out using our fair 1/3:1/3:1/3 plan. Our unique queuing process is known throughout the universal continuum.
sr. member
Activity: 266
Merit: 250
Wtf....great constructive posts, just think i wouldn't have to buy lights for christmas every year after i'm done with them..  no but really   good job!!
BG4
legendary
Activity: 1006
Merit: 1024
PaperSafe
Is there a line to wait in for these devices?Huh?
vip
Activity: 1428
Merit: 1145
But will these machines allow me to retire in my 20s? Will they be able to automatically adjust to mine whatever new revolutionary clone of Bitcoin with a different block-time altcoin that appears in the Alternate Cryptocurrency section? And more importantly, will they be able to mine the incoming 200mb blocks?? I don't know man, I might just look into buying another Jalapeno 5GH/s miner from BFL...

Yes, to all your questions.

Feel free to stop by our offices located in a Section 8 housing complex above a Mediterranean restaurant of which a trusted Bitcoiner works in an office directly across the street and runs a mining pool of which we're destined to purchase from him after we make him our COO-cum-VP depending on which the wind is blowin' on any given day.

Regarding your tentative Jalapeno purchase, bear in mind that with a light bulb attached to it, it'll make an excellent chicken brooder apparatus.


Brooder with our patented Edison Miner keeping the young chicks warm, also doubles as a coffee cup warmer.
legendary
Activity: 1134
Merit: 1118
But will these machines allow me to retire in my 20s? Will they be able to automatically adjust to mine whatever new revolutionary clone of Bitcoin with a different block-time altcoin that appears in the Alternate Cryptocurrency section? And more importantly, will they be able to mine the incoming 200mb blocks?? I don't know man, I might just look into buying another Jalapeno 5GH/s miner from BFL...
vip
Activity: 1428
Merit: 1145
Here's my idea with hopes that nobody steals it.

We, at Edison Miners Corp LLC Inc., propose purchasing the most efficient crypto miners, regardless the protocol used to mine whatever coinage, and hook up a switch to the power input that runs off and powers a light bulb of...wait for it...any wattage, any brand bulb, any type of lighting, including Christmas tree lights. Upgrades include the ability to power multiple light bulbs. Here's the beauty of the genius idea: Once the miner is no longer profitable to use as a miner, one would still have the ability to power light bulbs with it. Further, ALL obsolete miners could easily be converted to powering light bulbs with our affixed devises.



To prove that we are a real entity, the above depicts the unique engineering we'll be incorporating in all our Edison Miners.

FAQ:

Q: How is the light turned off?
A: Until a specific piece of hardware is develop, simply unplug the miner and the light goes off.

Q: Will Edison Miners mine Gavincoins?
A: Yes, albeit there'll be two alternate flashing red lights with this particular model once it becomes available in ~Q2, 2016.

Q: So that we're not taken for a ride, who exactly is behind this brainchild?
A: BFL and Capital One have joined a partnership to bring the idea to market.

Q: Wait, why does Capital One need $2M USD?
A: You are a troll! Quit posting in our thread or I will get a protection order on your ass because you are scaring me and my family.
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