If you own the domain then you should have the credentials to access the domain DNS and other stuffs of the domain and hosting. If you do not know what to do then contact with the actual domain company (goDadday, hostgator etc not sure in your case who they are) they will be able to help you to resolve your issue.
As far as I can tell, they didnt register the account on the domain, so sending a recovery email to "the account holder" isn't working. I did a catch-all but I'm gonna give it another go today now that I've actually slept for the first time in 3 days. Also, I'm all self-hosted on the domain side. Hosting accounts are shared reseller for the first 100 accounts, then I've got a stack that I'll be setting in a tier3 DC. Basically, I hate hostgator, godaddy, and bluehost so am rolling out a service that's still cheap but not as cheap/shitty and hoping for the best. We'll see if people like it or not.