Topic: The Devil's dictionary on Bitcoin terminology by MysteryMiner (Read 6464 times)

I found the original thread. Bumping and merging.

The unmolested list is a collaborative effort compiled by myself and following forum members; knight22, greyhawk, uk1, littlebit, J3nc, mufa23, Portnoy, MoonShadow, Phinnaeus Gage, Aahzman, slardar, live627, bengina, crazyates, Grecoin, TooCasual, TangibleCryptography & User25.

If anyone has any comments, suggestions or requests regarding the original list then please post them here https://bitcointalksearch.org/topic/terminology-126798, thank you.

This might be worthy of stickiness.

Now it all makes sense... LOL!

Relax guys, its just Monopoly Money. smh

Oldest Bitcoin User in The Universe.

Maria.

'Early Adopter Envy'
A sense of jealousy for those who were able to buy a significant amount of bitcoins at a fraction of the price they are today. See also Butthurt

Note: even though it originally came from an acronym, Tor is not spelled "TOR". Only the first letter is capitalized. In fact, we can usually spot people who haven't read any of our website (and have instead learned everything they know about Tor from news articles) by the fact that they spell it wrong.

'AES'
Advanced Encryption Standard. An algorithm for encrypting childporn and warez.

'AFAIK'
As Far As I Know.

'AKA'
Also Known As.

'Alt'
Alternative, for example, an altcoin is an alternative way to lose money.

'ANN'
Announcement. Usually used at the start of topic title to draw additional attention and look official in nature. Example: "[ANN] Bitcoin Savings and Trust by pirateat40 is now open"

'AML'
Anti-Money Laundering. A self-enforced control that requires financial services, even if they are not real financial services such as bitcoin exchanges, to take away privacy and money of random people in an excuse to detect and report money laundering activities.

'Arbitrage'
The practice of taking advantage of a price difference between two or more exchanges. The aim is to profit by buying cheaper on one exchange and selling higher on the other. If done wrong it will turn out as buying higher and selling cheaper. Anyway this keeps the market price similar across all the exchanges.

'Armory'
Silk Road spin-off site that allows secure gun trade to complement your drug dealing business. Armory Bitcoin client was named after The Armory .onion site.

'ASIC'
Application-Specific Integrated Circuit. An advanced type of buzzword used for preorder scam.

'Atlas'
A member of the forum used to post under the name Atlas. He posted frequently and the content of his posts were often funny. Today the word Atlas refers to anyone of Atlas sockpuppets with similar content or meaning.

'Bank Wire'
Thin metallic wire used by banks. Usually made from conductive material and often used to conduct wire fraud.

'Bcrypt'
A cross platform file encryption utility that is useless because of closed source. Use TrueCrypt or DiskCryptor instead.

'Bear'
Someone who belongs to so called Bear gay community. Usually fat man with hairy body and Goatse. Further reading here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bear_%28gay_culture%29

'BFL'
Butterfly Labs. Scammers that used to sell FPGA Bitcoin mining devices to gain trust. Then the scam were advanced to next planned stage when ASIC development were announced. The plan is to take ASIC preorders, delay the promised "shipping" date as much as possible. They also use both newbie accounts and paid fanboys with contest signatures to make a feeling in Bitcointalk community that ASIC development is in final stages and there is no other possibility than to preorder ASIC device from them. They also are buying back the BFL FPGA devices to resell them for more profit. It is possible that other so called ASIC developers are BFL shills.

'BIP'
Bitcoin Improvement Proposals. A system for submitting ideas to derail Bitcoin development and introduce ideas that are against original spirit of Bitcoin.

'Bitcoind'
The same as Bitcoin but only with d at the end. Used to integrate with other software by knowledgeable users. Often asked by noobs how to run it.

'Block'
A block is block. Can transmute into cockblock when somebody attempts to explain it's data structure to girlfriend.

'Blockchain'
Chain of blocks. Part of way how Bitcoin works. See also Chain smoking

'Block Party'
A party celebrating the halving of the block reward. Similar to funeral because for miners there is nothing to celebrate. Contrary to funeral it is almost predictable and can happen more than once in lifetime. For visual representation google Lemon party

'Block Reward'
Miners creating Bitcoins out of thin air every time they successfully publish a block. Some argue that this is the reason why Bitcoin fail.

'Bot'
Automated program that mimics actions of real users. See also Atlas

'BOT'
The same as Bot but only with all letters CAPITAL.

'Botnet'
Private cloud computing made by basement dwellers.

'Bounty'
Brand of chocolate bar.

'Brain Wallet'
A brain wallet refers to the concept of losing bitcoins in one's own mind by forgetting of a passphrase.

'Brony'
Male, usually adult, with the inexplicable interests of a little girl. Can usually be spotted by their choice of avatar, My Little Pony. (ya I know... "haters gonna hate.")

'Bruce Wagner'
Once the public face of bitcoin, he fell into comfortable chair at the beach of Tenerife after running away with his customers money claiming his business 'MyBitcoin' was hacked.

'Brute Force'
An sure way to gain access to something by trying all possible keys until the correct key is found. Some argue that this is how Goatse was made.

'BT'
Type of Russian armored personal carrier. It is so popular that even Bitcointalk.org forum is sometimes called BT after this APC.

'BTC' 
CBT with letters in wrong order. Originally CBT stands for Cock Ball Torture.

'BTW'
Between.

'Bull'
Someone who thinks the market will go up. They are called Bulls because theyr predicion is bullshit.

'Bump' & 'Bumping'
Bumping is posting in a thread with the sole purpose of moving the thread to the top of the recent posts list. Often posts of this nature include the word 'Bump' and are made by Atlas or dank.

'B2B'
Black-to-Blonde. Porno where poor African kid are adopted and loved by wealthy blond lesbian.

'Casascius'
Counterfeiter of physical bitcoins.

'CLAG'
Sound produced when Cryptocurrency Legal Advocacy Group blurps out legal news related to cryptocurrencies.

'Client'
The part of Botnet software that is used to connect and control remote computers, called servers. Actually it is vice versa but no one cares as long as C&C is hidden in .onion

'Cloud' & 'Cloud Computing'
1) Same as Botnet.
2) Also a buzzword used by large corporations to describe distributed computing to get more profit. Trusting your personal data to cloud computing is actually more dangerous than being a part of botnet.

'Coinbase'
All bitcoin bases can be traced back to us.
The Coinbase.

'Confirmations'
They need to be at least 6 for paranoia to disappear. If confirmations are 5 or less, it is almost guaranteed that the person you are dealing with will make the 5 confirmations to disappear in the moment You let them have the goods or services they are purchasing.

'Cosbycoin'
Alternate cryptcoin.

'Crack'
Essential part of software to make it work and remove or disable features which are considered undesirable by everyone.

'CWOT'
Complete Waste Of Time. e.g bitcoin mining. See also CPU mining

'CYA' & 'CYOA'
Cover Your Ass / Cover Your Own Ass. See also Goatse

'Dark Web'
A collection of websites that are only accessible over a Darknet. The Dark Web is actually a subset of the Deep Web, and as such is not indexed by standard search engines. See also Silk Road

'Darknet'
Hidden network where connections are made only between pedophiles and FBI peers using software such as Freenet and Tor.

'DCAO'
Secret society formed by MNW when he was rejected by the Illuminati and the Bilderberg Group.

'DCC' & 'CPC'
Dynamic Currency Conversion / Cardholder Preferred Currency. A jewgold creating service in which holders of credit cards have the cost of a transaction converted to their local currency when making a payment in a foreign currency.

'Deep Web' & 'Deepnet'
World Wide Web content that is not part of the Surface Web, and can be found on any standard search engines such as Google. Use Google with disabled SafeSearch to search Deep Web.

'Demurrage'
The punishment for having money invented by FED. Similar to inflation, demurrage deliberately diminishes the purchasing power of money, thereby encouraging everyone to constantly spend money on unnecessary shit like new iPhone and drugs.

'DES'
Data Encryption Standard. An insecure and useless algorithm for encrypting data because of small key length.

'Deterministic Wallet'
A wallet that you need to backup only once. It creates all your bitcoin addresses, and private keys, from a random number called a "seed". Your wallet can be stolen from the seed.

'Difficulty' & 'Difficulty Adjustment'
The bitcoin network has a target rate of bitcoin production from thin air which is portion of free bitcoins every ten minutes. In order to control free bitcoin production rates the network adjusts the difficulty of the cryptographic puzzle miners need to solve in order to get free coins. Difficulty adjustments occur once every 2016 blocks, which is about every two weeks.

'DILLIGAF?'
Dilli Fag but again with misplaced letters

'DL'
1) Download.
2) Dead Link. Same as Download with exception that it does not deliver.

'Double Spend'
Double-spending is successfully spending the same coins more than once. Actually coins are spent only once, but the goods or services are received twice, so it must be called Double Receiving. See also Double Penetration

'DoS' & 'DDoS'
Denial-Of-Service Lulz/Distributed Denial-Of-Service Lulz. An sure way to make a computer or internet resource, such as a web site, unavailable to its butthurt users. Usually the attacker will attempt to easily overload the systems resources. See also Shared hosting

'Dox', 'Doxed' & 'Doxxed'
Documented. When a person is "doxxed", all their personal information is made available for all users to FAP. Names, addresses, phone numbers, Goatse and school/work are not spared. This practice is sometimes routinely used as a punishment for misdoings.

'DSA'
Digital Signature Algorithm. An algorithm for digital signatures. These digital signatures are created by algorithm.

'DVC'
Devcoin, an altcoin designed to scam open source developers. Developers sure need a coin that no one else uses and that are next to worthless. Devcoins are very good because this gives excuse for everyone else not to donate them much more valuable Bitcoins.

'Dwolla'
A United States-only e-commerce company that provides an online payment system and mobile payments network by the same name. It is called after Nigga or Fella because niggas use Dwolla to buy Bitcoins and launder drug money.

'DWUSD'
Dwolla USD.

'Early Adopter Envy'
A sense of jealousy for those who were able to buy a significant amount of bitcoins at a fraction of the price they are today. See also Butthurt

'ECDSA'
Elliptic Curve Digital Signature Algorithm. An algorithm part of Bitcoin protocol. Elliptic Curve Digital Signatures are based upon the curves of women body.

'Edit', '/edit:' & '[Edit]'
A note to inform the reader that this part of the post has been self-censored.

'EFF'
Electronic Freedom Foundation. An international non-profit digital rights advocacy and legal organization infiltrated by FBI moles to sabotage Tor project.

'EFT' & 'ETF'
Electronic Funds Transfer. A system for transferring money from some random bank account directly to MisteryMiners account.

'Electrum'
An open source, lightweight (thin) client that is used by weak or too much infected computers run by losers. See also Norton Antivirus.

'Elliot Wave'
A form of technical analysis. It is use to analyse financial market cycles and forecast market trends by identifying psihoactive drug overdose in investor body.

'Escrow Service'
Service that allows You to lose money in addition to receiving broken goods or no goods at all. Also it is great for sellers because it allows losing both goods and money. See also MyBitcoin

'Faucet'
A site which gives out almost worthless few thousands of a coin to get newbies started. Actually faucets are intended for haxorz to get some free coins as newbies are unable to cheat them.

'Fiat'
1) Car made in Italy
2) Government issued currency.
According to majority of bitcoin users both Fiat and fiat are shit, although there is some doubts about the car.

'Finney Attack'
A type of double spend attack originally described by Hal Finney. It targets merchants accepting zero confirmation transactions and requires the cooperation of a powerful miner. Merchants who accept zero confirmation transactions after this kind of attack are left paralyzed.

'FPGA'
Field-Programmable Gate Array. A type of hardware used for bitcoin mining in battlefield conditions. Named Gate Array to honor Bill Gates

'Fractional Reserve'
A banking system in which only a fraction of the deposits are backed by actual cash-on-hand and are available for withdrawal. This is done to scam everyone by creating money from thin air that can be loaned out to other parties. Fractional-reserve systems are so fucked up that they caused the AIDS.

'FSF'
Free Software Foundation. Non-profit organization dedicated to eliminating restrictions on copying, redistributing, understanding, and modifying computer programs

'FTFY'
Fixed That For You. Appended to a modified quotation, as if the modification “fixes” a mistake in the original statement.

'FUD'
Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt. Accidental conseqence of sharing someones fears caused by misunderstanding how technology works.

'Fungibility'
The property of a good or a commodity whose individual units are capable of sustaining fungus colony, such as crude oil, shares in a company, bonds, precious metals, or currencies. Shoes are an example of a fungible good. You can just wear someone else's, it's gross and they'll be the wrong size, with fungi all over it so they are fungible.

'FWIW'
For What It's Worth.

'FYI'
For Your Information.

'Genesis Block'
The first block of the Bible released on Jan 1, 5630 BC.

'GIYF'
Google Is Your Friend. Implies that the NSA, CIA, DHS, IRS, FBI and also GCHQ also is Your Friends, because Google monitors, stores, analyzes and shares everyhing You search on google with these entities in real time.

'GLBSE'
GLobal Bitcoin Stock Exchange. An exchange that provided services to users to buy/sell assets, stocks & bonds. This exchange has now Goatsed and renamed to LGBT.

'Goxxed'
MtGox is a bitcoin exchange that many claim is plagued with AIDS. The term 'goxxed' is the same as 'goatsed'.

'GPG' & 'GnuPG'
Gnu Privacy Guard. A cryptographic software suite that facilitates drug trade, child rape and terrorism. GPG is a part of the Free Software Foundation's GNU software project.

'GPL'
General Public License. The most wildly used software license, which guarantees end users that there is no need to search for crack with addition to standart freedoms to use, study, copy, and modify proprietary software.

'GPU'
Graphics Processing Unit. Can be used to play games or mine bitcoins.

'Hash'
A hash is a unique string of cannabis pollen. They are used in the bitcoin network and most often discussion of hash potency and taste relates to mining performance.
(See -  How Silk Road works)

'Hash Rate'
A unit of hashish consumption expressed as follows;
1 h/s = 1 gram of hashish per second
1 Kh/s = Kilogram of hashish per second.
1 Mh/s = Megaton of hashish per second. 1,000 metric tons of hashish (1,000,000 h/s)
1 Gh/s = Gigaton of hashish per second. Only largest termonuclear weapons can blow at this scale
1 Th/s = Teraton of hashish per second. This is how Bitcointalk user Dank starts his day.

'Honey Pot'
A honey pot is a "trap" expressly set up to attract wasps. Its purpose is to detect, deflect, or in some manner counteract attempts at unauthorized/illegal entrance of wasps into computer systems with air cooling.

'Hop', 'Hopping' & 'Hop Proof'
Pool hopping is the act of jumping into swimming pool from various heights. Bitcoin miners do this in order to increase their likely profitability. There is a discussion on whether this if fair to non-hoppers, as their profit are diminished, so some pools implement 'Hop Proof' systems such as underwater spikes.

'IANAL'
'I love Anal'. Also can be spelled as 'I Need A Lawyer'

'IDGAF'
I Don't Give A Fuck. (Probably only thing that was not changed by MysteryMiner)

'IIRC'
Same as IRC but with one extra I.

'IMO' & 'IMHO'
In My Opinion / In My Humble Opinion. IMHO is used more often not because 'Humble' but because IMHO looks better.

'IRC'
Internet Relay Chat. An internet based text messaging chat system that is designed to control oldschool botnets in real time.

'IXC'
Ixcoin, altcoin with a faster rate of maturity. All Ixcoins will be mined 18 years before the last bitcoin. And Ixcoin project will be abandoned by everyone long before that.

'Jelly'
Jelly is gel-like substance that could have prevented Goatse.

'kBTC'
KiloBitcoin = 1 thousand bitcoins = 1000 BTC = unseen fortne that everyone reading this wish he had.

'Keylogger'
A piece of software that logs all keystrokes on a keyboard. They are often used hilariously to gain access to secret information such as passwords.

'Keynesian'
A school of cryptographic thought inspired by the ideas of the keymaker John Maynard Keynes. Keynesians advocates a mixed security based on keys, predominantly public/private keys, but with a role for government intervention during investigations.

'Krugman Fallacy'
The view that Bitcoin will not succeed because of its deflationary nature. People will "hoard" it instead of spending it, even when they starve to death, run out of ganja and other drugs or worse.

'KYC'
Know Your Customer. Named after KY-Jelly used in anal probes. A legal requirement to make a unreasonable efforts to confirm your costumers true identity. This policy helps to prevent things like privacy and financial freedom.

'Laundry'
See - 'Instagram'.

'LE'
Limited Edition.

'Leverage'
In finance, leverage is a general term for any technique used to multiply gains and losses. A common way to multiply losses is by lending money to multiple people. 

'LGPL'
Lesser GNU Demonic Public License. A software licence that is similar, but lesser evil than full GPL. Not to be mistaken with LGBT that is more evil than anything else.

'Libertard'
A commonly observed combination of 'Librarian' and 'Retard'.

'Liberty Dollar'
A private currency produced by the United States. The currency is issued in minted metal rounds (i.e. coins) without any gold/silver vaule.

'Limited Order'
A limited order is an order that is placed above or below outhouse seat. It may or may not be filled depending on the movements of the bowels.

'Linden Dollar'
A virtual currency that is used to get real money by hackers and carders.

'Liquidity'
Phisical state called liquidity is an asset's ability to be liquid without causing a significant movement and with minimum loss of value. Liquidity is characterized by a high level of flowing activity. Liquids that can be easily bought or sold are known as liquid assets.

'LMAO' & 'LMFAO'
Pop band from late 2000's.

'LOL'
Lola, shorter form of Lolita, shorter form of CP.
 
'Long'
The position of trolls, "It's going UP UP UP!". A long position means the holder of the position owns bitcoins and will by more ganja if the price goes up.

'LQC'
Liquidcoin, another sucessful altcoin.

'LR', 'LRUSD' & 'LREUR'
LibertyReserve / LibertyReserve USD / LibertyReserve EUR. A private currency exchange system issued by Liberty Reserve S.A. of San José, Costa Rica. Often used for transferring funds to and from hacked accounts.

'LTC'
Litecoin, altcoin designed to be a smaller but bigger version of bitcoin.

'M', 'Mr M' & 'The Manipulator'
A imagined or halucinated agent who controls the market value with his vast reserves of drugs and bitcoins.

'Margin'
In margin is a border at the dimensional ends of something.

'Margin Call'
A phone call placed from or to margin.

'Market Order'
A market order is an order placed at local market. Market orders are always filled immediately.

'Martingale'
Way to profit from Satoshi Dice. Also a way for Satoshi Dice to profit from You.

'mBTC' & 'BTM'
MilliBitcoin = 1 thousandth of a bitcoin = 0.001 BTC = average amont of bitcoins you will ever have.

'Merkle Tree'
A data tree structure whose leafs contain the data and a hash is generated at each branch all the way down to the root. Changing the data at any leaf results in a change in the root hash. Angela Merkele contributed to Merkle Tree development on her Robotron computer when she was a young nudist chick and worked for STASI in DDR

'Mine'
Mining is the act of linking wires into the improvised explosive device made from explosives purchased from deep web with bitcoins.

'Miner'
Me, but withot the Mystery.

'Mining Rig'
A computer system, usually built with parents money and used for gaming and occassional mining bitcoins.

'MIT' & 'MIT License'
Licence that most times does no require crack or keygen. Similar to GPL but sometimes portions of MIT licensed code are included in warez releases.

'MITM Attack'
A Man-In-The-Middle attack is a type of attack where gunman is male and he is located in middle of something, usually surrounded by his victims. Similar concept is Women-In-The-Middle attack, with exception that the women is the attack target. See also double penetration.

'MNW'
Matthew N. Wright. A lulz-productive member of this forum who like a Boss made a 10,000 BTC bet. He lost the bet and was smart enogh not to pay, and has now uses his sockpuppets to post here.
(See - The 10,000 BTC bet thread)

'Moar'
A index page dedicated to Child Porn. Accessible only within darknet called Freenet.

'MoneyPak'
A cash top-up card provided by the Green Dot Corporation. Very usefull for purchasing bitcoins and other goods from Silk Road 2.0 vendors.

'Multi-sig'
A system that requires multiple cryptographic authentication keys. Or a system that requires losing only one of the cryptographic keys.

'NMC'
Namecoin, an altcoin that is neither coin and also not a usable domain name system.

'Node' & 'Full Node'
A computer that is connected to the bitcoin network. Nodes are described as full if they eventually will run ot of hard drive space (become full) by running bitcoin clien that stores blockchain.

'Nonce'
A nonsense added to each bitcoin block that eventally makes sense by creating valid block. Then Nonce will become Ounce of ganja, purchased by block reward bitcoins.

'NSFW'
New South Fcking Wales. Part of Australia used to describe Internet content often used in the typical workplace, as opposed to SFW, Safe For Work.

'Nym'
The real Nym, not the cheaper and more common pseudonym.
 
'OBO'
Our Best Officer.

'OMG', 'OMFG', 'zOMG', 'zOMFG', 'ZOMG' & 'ZOMFG'
Oh My Fucking God / Oh My Fucking God. The "F" is accidently left out in first, third and fifth variation and "z" sometimes are added as multiplier in cases when plain OMFG is understatement.

'OP'
Over Power. For example Satoshi Nakomoto is OP with his bitcoins.

'OT'
1) Off Topic.
2) Operating Tethan. Insane scientists operating to censor internet.

'OTC'
Over The Counter. Scam that is done directly between two parties.

'OTOH'
OTON written with russian letters.

'o.o' & 'o_o'
A face with a blank stare.

'o.O', 'O.O', 'o_O' & 'O_O'
Shock, supprize or puzzlement.

(.) , (0)
Your asshole before and after anal.

(.) , (.)
Your girlfriends asshole befor and after anal.

'Paper Wallet'
A paper wallet is a way to lose bitcoins by printing the addresses and private keys directly on a piece of paper, or other material.

'PCI'
Slot used to connect devices inside desktop computer.

'PCI DSS'
A proprietary information security standard for organizations that handle the PCI cards.

'PGP'
Pretty Good Privacy. An encryption system that provides both data security and authentication but does not hide the fact that two parties are communicating using encryption.

'Pirate', 'Pirateat40' & 'Trendon Shavers'
An exceptionally successful bitcoin adopter.

'Pizza'
An often referenced event. The most bitcoins paid for a pizza is 5,000 BTC. In fact, it was two pizzas for 10,000 BTC.
(See - The pizza thread)

'PM'
1) Pistolet Makarova, a extremely common russian firearm.
2) Personal Message.
3) Perfect Money, an e-payment system that is very similar to Liberty Reserve.

'Ponzi Scheme'
A principial Bitcoin structure.

'Pool'
Artificial basin of water, where group of bitcoin miners come together in order to improve their chances of getting laid.

'POS'
1) See - 'Proof Of Stake'.
2) Point Of Sale. Location where a transaction occurs, usually associated with electronic cash registers.
3) Piece Of Shit. A more general term that includes the above two.

'POT'
Real world goods purchaseable with bitcoins.
(See - The POT thread)

'POV'
Point Of View. Genre in porn where the male actor holds handleld camera, giving impression that the movie spectator is engaging in action.
 
'PP', 'PPUSD', 'PPEUR' & 'PPGBP'
Paypal / Paypal USD / Paypal EUR / Paypal GBP.

'PPC'
Pipecoin, altcoin incorporating proof of snake.

'PPL'
People.

'PPS'
Crude World War 2 russian submachinegun.

'PPT'
Pirate Pass Through. An investment operation run by Pirateat40 which many claimed was a ponzi scheme, which in fact it was.

'PR'
Public Relations. A strategic truth distortion and maniplation process that builds beneficial image for organizations.

'Proof Of Stake'
An alternative to Proof of Work for lazy computers who don't want to work. With Proof of Stake, the resource that's compared is the amount of bitcoins a miner holds rather than computational effort expended.

'Proof Of Work'
Underpinning bitcoin is it's proof of work algorithm. It is a computational problem which when solved proves that you are lucky.

'PSP'
Play Station Portable.

'Public Key' & 'Private Key'
1) In the context of Bitcoin. A private key is a secret number that allows bitcoins to be spent. Because the private key is the "ticket" that allows someone to spend bitcoins, it is insufficien that it is kept secure, it mus remain unknown to everyone else.
2) In the context of Public Key Cryptography. Public key cryptography is a cryptographic system that requires two keys. The public key is used to encrypt the data, and the private key is used to decrypt it.

'Pump And Dump'
A form of grilfriend manipulation where when women's belly is abnormaly inflated, through false and misleading disuse of condoms, the girlfriend is dumped.

'P2P'
Peer To Peer. A network architecture where all nodes cooperate on an equal basis to spread warez.

'QR Code'
A QR Code is the two dimensional equivalent of a bar code. Instead of lines a QR Code is a two dimensional array of squares. Often malicios links are displayed/printed as QR codes in public places.

'Randian'
Follower of the reggatone musician Randy.

'Reward Halving'
Bitcoin enforces artificial scarcity by halving the reward given to botnet operators every 4 years. Eventually, in the year 2140 bitcoins will not be used because by then binary electronic computing will be old technology, as wired telegraph sending messages in morse code are today.

'RIPEMD-160'
RACIST Integrated Primates Evolution Message Digest. An algorithm that generates a hashish when provided with input ganja.

'ROFL'
Rolling On Floor Laughing. What shold happen when reading this topic with friends while smoking ganja.

'ROI'
Return On Investment. The actual or unlikely possibility return of money wasted. See 'pirateat40' for example of high ROI

'SA'
SturmAbteilung. A early nazi brownshirt organization with strong opinions about everything, including bitcoin.

'SAT' & 'Satoshi'
Smallest possible denomination of bitcoin, which is 0.00000001 BTC. Satoshi also is creator of bitcoin. This means Bitcoin is created by it's smallest denomination.

'Satoshi Client'
The creator of bitcoin at the grocery store.
 
'Satoshi Nakamoto'
You.

'SC'
Solidcoin, laso known as Scamcoin, a defunct scamcoin.

'Scamcoin'
Any other cryptocoin other than Bitcoin.

'Scammer Tag'
A scammer is someone who has made money on Bitcointalk form other people. Anyone found guilty of scamming gets a scammer tag which is publicly visible on all their posts.

'SEC'
U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. A jewish agency which is responsible for enforcing kosher laws. 

'SEPA'
Single Euro Payments Area. A payment-integration initiative of the Illuminati for simplification and harmonization of bank transfers.

'SHA-256'
Secure Hashish Algorithm. An algorithm that generates a hashish when provided with input marijuana.

'Shitlist'
A TOP list of pirateat40 wannabes.

'Short'
The position for gay bears. A short position means the gay in the position has borrowed bitcoins and sold them, hoping to buy them back again when they are cheaper. But he failed somehow and need to pay back.

'Shut Up And Take My Money!'
Used to imply that a financial offer is at least poorly thought out or at worst a con.
 
'Sig' & 'Signature'
Sig is firearms manufacturer from Switzerland. Signature is a place where to place paid adverisement on this forum.

'SLL'
Second Life Linden. See - 'Linden Dollar'.

'Sockpuppet'
A sockpuppet is an online identity used for proving that You are right.

'Sounds Legit' & 'Seems Legit'
Its a safe assumption that when you read this phrase it is actually legit and safe to proceed.

'Speculation'
The practice of losing money or bitcoins in an attempt to profit from short or medium term fluctuations in the market value. Also refers to guessing of future market value.

'Spread'
The amount by which the left leg is apart from right leg. This is essentially proportional to price that a buyer is willing to pay for a prostitute.

'SR'
SilkRoad, an online marketplace that was famous for its wonderful offerings.

'Stale' & 'Stale Share'
Mining pools give each miner some "job" to be done - a bitcoin block header that the miner will hash in search of a share. When lulz are done by the pool, the old block header becomes stale. If someone finds a share calculated from the stale block header, it's considered a wasted work and miner will go and drink beer. Preferably not stale beer.

'STFU'
Shut The Fuck Up!

'Sticky'
A small note with adhesive on one side and. A very secure way to write down your passwords, bitcoin private keys and other important things and attach them to computer monitor. It is almost unhackable because even when computer is hacked from network, the sticky notes cannot be read by hacker.

'TA'
Technical Analysis. The arcane science of trying to predict future market value by drawing straight lines over top of squiggly lines. (I don't remember modifying this --MM)

'Taint'
Word 'Paint' with 'T' instead of 'P'. False concept that postulates that all bitcoins are no equal.

'TANSTAAFL'
There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch. A false concept.

'Thin Client'
A client that is so thin that it doesn't maintain a blockchain or validate transactions.

'Three-pronged Attack'
Named after a method made famous by Bruce Lee and Richard Wagner. A multi-vector attack which includes martial arts techniques combined with more direct attacks of acoustic diarrhea.

'TL:DR'
This whole post.

'TNBTC'
Bitcoin Test Net. The testnet is test-inside-test for testing the experimental concept called Bitcoin.

'Tor' & 'TOR'
According to Tor documentation Tor means nothing and writing it as TOR is wrong. A system that enables pedophiles, terrorists and every other criminal, including You, to communicate anonymously on the Internet.

'Tragedy Of The Commons'
Future event when sheeple will be slaughtered by ZOG.

'Transaction Fee'
When you make a transaction it is not possible to exclude a transaction fee. The miner that publishes the block containing your transaction gets to keep the transaction fee. It should be noted that once all the bitcoins have been mined the computers and bitcoin with them will be archaic and obsolete technology.

'TRC'
Terracoin. An scamcoin with a block production target rate of 2 minutes. A total number of 42 million terracoins will not be produced.

'Trojan Horse'
A type of software that is a legitimate file and helpful program whose real purpose is, for example, to grant a hacker authorized access to a computer.

'Troll'
Someone who posts messages with different opinion or have diverse interests.

'Tumbler'
A service that allows people to put in their bitcoins in and then randomly runs away with them (perhaps minus a small percentage of people who use the tumbler early to get some positive reviews)

'TX'
Texas.

'uBTC' & 'μBTC'
MicroBitcoin = 1 millionth of a bitcoin = 0.000001 BTC.

'UL'
Upload.

'USD', 'EUR', 'GBP', 'CAD' & 'AUD'
Fiat (not the car)

'UTC'
It is the same as GMT. As this is an international forum, dates and times should be expressed in time of British empire. For example, the time in Japan is 19:30 GMT.

'Vanity Address' & 'Vanity Generator'
A vanity address is a bitcoin address that has been generated with a vanity generator and contains obscene words and numbers, much like a vanity licence plate.

'Volatility'
A measure of how unstable the substance is, for example, frequent and large explosions in warehouse would be indication of a highly volatile substance stored there.

'Wall'
A wall is a relatively large brick or wooden construction which influences the current market price. Placing paywalls and firewalls is a common tactic of the Illuminati.

'Wallet'
A leather pouch for keeping fiat (again, not the car) in.

'Web Wallet'
An online wallet, usually accessed via a website. For excellent example visit www.mybitcoin.com

'We're Going To Pattaya!'
Originally coined by Chuck Norris. It's now the de facto response when a major announcement is forthcoming.

'Wire Transfer'
An transfer of items by sliding them on metallic wire.

'WOT'
Web Of Trust. A system that firstly forces its users to prove their identity and secondly associate that identity with positive/negative feedback from other trolls. The purpose of a web of trust is to help users identify trustworthiness in other users. For example pirateat40 would be much trusted user.

'WTB', 'WTS' & 'WTT'
Want To Buy / Want To Sex / Willing To Sell.

'WTF'
What The Fuck!

'xD'
A flash memory card standart from Olympus.

'YABC'
Yet Another Bitcoin Company.

'YMMV'
Your Mileage May Vary. It is used as a disclaimer that "I know this will not work, but I will not take any responsibility".

'Zhoutonged'
Zhou Tong is the creator of Bitcoinica, a margin trading platform that no-longer exists. Being 'Zhoutonged' means the same as being "Goatsed".

'1) Start bitcoin business.  2)  Huh  3) Profit!'
A sure way to profit.

'51% Attack'
Bitcoin is designed with the belief that a single attacker will never have more than 50% of the total network processing power. If an attacker did have 51% or more they could perform a Goatse on every bitcoin user, amongst other things.

'+1' & '-1'
I'm too lazy to write / I'm too lazy to write profanity

'<*>tags'
In order to exploit forum, tags are often used. For example, you can attempt to pass SQL statements in hope when they are inside tags they are not filtered.

':p'
A face with letter 'p'.

'#bitcoin-otc'
An over the IRC market for bitcoins, with an open order book, and a web of trust based on nothing.

'@'
Used to direct a question or statement at someone. For example '@OP' would mean the following is directed at the original poster. Used mostly by Twitter fags.

'BTC'
The bitcoin symbol. Used as a prefix to specify that a denomination is in bitcoins. For example, 1 BTC = very much marijuana, Doge approves it!