Guys! I am really keen on stories about living in different countries and in what, how do you imagine the life in Russia ? 8)Its a real talk!
Bear with me since I am not Russian nor do I associate with Russians so this is pure conjecture.
The life in Russia I, as the patriarch of a household of 2 children (one daughter in her teens and one adult son) and my wife would arise early in the morning; let's say around 7am. While I prepare the coffee, my wife will make some eggs or porridge, maybe some bread with sausage or cheese on it or possibly kefir that I will wash down with a stiff shot of vodka (which I need because my son of 21 years old does not have a job or attend school). My wife will wake our young daughter and try to get her ready for school. She of course will refuse any breakfast since she is overly concerned about her weight and wants to be a supermodel like Irina Shayk or a world-class tennis player like Ana Kournikova. Perhaps she will have a cup of juice or a spoonful of yogurt and then spend the next half hour applying her make-up and choosing her clothing. My son, of course will still be sleeping since he was up all night trying to mine Bitcoin or some shitcoin thinking he will be rich one day while driving up my electricity bill which he can't help to pay since he has no job - I take another shot of vodka; likely Stolichnaya.
After we get breakfast out of the way, I will walk my wife to the Metro station. My daughter no longer wants to walk with us as she is embarrassed to admit we are her parents. I suppose she doesn't want potential suitors to know what she will eventually look like as she ages. We talk about our son and what to do about his lack of regular employment, desire for higher education and his general overall lackadaisical outlook on life - I take a hit on the hip flask my son gave me for New Year's day (I'm pretty sure it was used but hey, it still works). We kiss goodbye and go our separate ways to work. By the way, my wife is a school teacher and I am a scientist. She tells me the children are generally well behaved and studious in school but the clothing they wear looks rather old and ragged but that's the style these days. In my day, we would have had to wear a school uniform and there was no heat in the classrooms you really wanted to make sure you didn't have any holes in your clothing. Fortunately, my daughter likes to dress fairly well.
Here are pictures of my kids:
Our daughter
Our son
We haven't been able to get a decent picture of our son since he was 16. We just can't stay up late enough to catch him awake - I take another hit on my hip flask.
Before I board the Metro, I stop to realize that I have forgotten to take the dog out to do his business. I call my wife hoping that she might have remembered; she had not so I call home hoping to find our daughter still there but to no avail for she has undoubtedly left for school by now. I let it ring 10 times but there is no answer; my son has probably disconnected the phone lines again so as not to disturb his beauty rest. I trudge home and take the dog for a quick walk in a nearby park taking care to scoop up after him and deposit it in the proper waste container. For some time now, there are plastic scoops and paper bags to collect dog waste for disposal. The parks were becoming a minefield of dog turds so I'm happy to do this. I return home with our dog, which is a French Bulldog, pretty much all the dogs in Moscow are French Bulldogs these days - likely because they don't smile very often just like their masters.
I head back to the Metro station and decide to stop on the way to get a coffee. I have to be quick as I am almost late for work so I pay with my Unionpay tap and go card and promise to leave a good tip tomorrow. The server usually likes to get a tip but will understand if you don't have some how-u-say
moneda? handy to leave with them. I take a seat on the Metro which is rare since it is generally packed in the early morning rush-hour but my unexpected foray home to take the dog out has delayed my departure... I consider making this a regular habit. It's nice having a seat to myself. I sip my coffee and... Chto?! Koritsa!! I asked them not to put cinnamon in it!!!! Shit. I take another hit on my hip flask.
Well that's my stop. I have to go to work now but just so you know, I'll probably have some soup for lunch - possibly schi or uha - or maybe pelmeni and then I will have to call my son to make sure he is awake and going to look for a job. By noon I will stop drinking alcohol because I don't want to perpetuate the myth of the stereotypical alcoholic Russian.
Do svidaniya!
