Here is finally a response from a stupid ass university filled with illiterate morons who have absolutely no place in a decent society. This letter demonstrates a complete lack of competency and decency at the City University of New York. I doubt that other institutions have much more competency, so when you start shitting literal dicks after your doctor prescribed you the wrong medicine, you can probably blame the university that trained that doctor. And BSL-4 laboratories at such unprofessional universities are going to fuck shit up and people are going to fucking die, but all those who perish can't say I did not fucking warn them. This letter is gold and quite revealing about all the senseless bullshit that goes on at universities. Face it. Your degree is probably worthless. Oh. And New York City is a fucking shithole. New Jersey (the garbage state) also smells like ass.
Dear Mr. Van Name:
This is in response to your letter written to Governor Hochul dated April 15. 2023, stating that
you were a professor at the City University of New York ("CUNY™) and that during your time on
campus, you reported two separate incidents alleging student misconduct. We understand that
you last taught at The City College of New York (CCNY) in December 2020 and that both of
these incident reports were filed during your employment at City College.
CCNY has conducted a search of our records and we have not found any records of a student
engaging in violence against you. We do have two reports, handled by our Public Safety and
Student Affairs Offices. that we show as closed. One case is specific to a student who, as
someone with English as their second language, misinterpreted the First Amendment and Second
Amendment during a discussion with you. The second incident report shows that your complaint
was submitted to the Chief Diversity Office at City College and that a resolution was provided to
both you and the student in question, with the student dropping your class and confirming
they would not register for any classes you were teaching at the time.
As stated in the CUNY Workplace Violence Policy and Procedures, CUNY has a longstanding
commitment to promoting a safe and secure academic and work environment, and all students.
faculty and staff are expected to maintain a working and learning environment free from
violence. Threats of violence should be reported to Campus Public Safety. If you wish to provide
additional information regarding the incident, you may contact Kisha Shrouder. Executive
Director of Human Resources at CCNY at
[email protected].
Sincerely,
Holy fucking shit. Did chatGPT write this letter or was it written by GPT2 or something? There are so many fucking factual inaccuracies in this letter that some language models probably took a few records about when I taught and how many incidents there were that were reported and produced a bullshit letter out of this.
Factual inaccuracies: 0. I have a Ph.D., so you might want to call me Dr Van Name. But whatever, I am also a mister, and there is nothing wrong with referring to me as a male human being who may or may not have a Ph.D. It is cool so far. But let's go on.
1. There were two incidents. One was a fucking sexual harassment incident because everyone likes to sexually harass me because humans are disgusting pieces of shit. But that is not the incident that I am referring to. I am referring to the incident where a student threatened me with violence and probably was ready to show up with a gun and shoot me dead. I say probably because I was not given too much information about the nature of this threat. I only heard about it from the public safety office.
1. I did not teach at CCNY after the incident at all. I was promptly removed from class and made to grade abstract algebra homework. Yes. When a student is threatening a professor, the university is stupid enough to think that the professor is the problem and that the professor should be removed from class. None of the other students thought that this was a good idea, but nobody asked them what they think. They just removed me out of hatred and revenge. I cancelled class for one fucking period, but because of this I was permanently removed. The reason for this is probably that universities want me to teach a class where a student wants to fucking murder me because universities are filled with bloodthirsty evil people who will get tortured by Satan for all eternity in HELL.
2. "misinterpreted the First Amendment and Second Amendment during a discussion with you."-Holy fucking shit. Nobody brought up the first or second amendment in class or anywhere else. In case you did not know, the second amendment states that “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.” This does not give anyone the right to shoot me, but this does give everyone the right to take that piece of paper that says 'University of Left Toronto has conferred upon Donaldo Trumpez the degree of master of farts' and to blow a couple of holes in it as long as the noise does not disturb the neighbors when they are trying to fucking sleep. The student probably misinterpreted the second amendment and thought it meant that the constitution guarantees everyone the right to blow a hole in my head and shoot me dead. That is fucking disturbing. Holy fucking shit.
3. No. CUNY does not have a commitment to anyone's safety. This is a factual inaccuracy. What they should have said was "CUNY promotes violence, but CUNY is working on it. We sincerely apologize because we are horrible people who will probably go to Hell."
4. I last taught at another CUNY institution in May of 2020. I did not teach at CCNY for a while because they only want people who subject themselves to violence to teach there. Fucking shit.
5. Um. I was called into the public safety office to discuss threats of violence. Of course, these threats probably went away after they decided that I am better off fucking dead.
PUNS FOR THE ENTIRE IVY LEAGUE!!!
Yale-Jail
Princeton-Prison
U Penn-The Penitentiary
Harvard-Hamas University (Thanks Claudine Gay for helping us with this one. Harvard hates Jews.)
Cornell-Porn Hell
Columbia-Renamed from CUNY because everyone misspelt it as CUNT. Oh wait. CUNT is an accurate description. Or maybe Columbia was renamed from City College after everyone kept on calling it Shitty College.
Brown-The color of shit.
Dartmouth-Fartmouth.
Fuck,shit,9@#$@,cunt,ass,bitch,mierda. There. I said it. Are you happy now?
-Joseph Van Name Ph.D.
P.S. College girls pay for college my making porn because college girls are disgusting pieces of shit. BRING BACK DEBTOR'S PRISONS FOR PEOPLE WITH STUDENT LOAN DEBT.
P.P.S. I still know how to prevent those BSL-4 labs from fucking shit up, but I won't prevent this because I don't give a fuck about you or anyone else anymore.
P.P.P.S. Hmm. CCNY's neighbor Columbia university is also having problems. Well, I just visited Columbia University in the middle of the protest with my 600 lb pig. We ate a lot of bacon together. And nobody messed with us because nobody wanted to mess with a 600 lb pig. Haha.
-Joseph Van Name Ph.D.
