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Topic: A warning against cheating and lending to a trusted friend (Read 285 times)

legendary
Activity: 3122
Merit: 1032
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I would feel very disappointed in my friend if they never paid me back. It means that my friend is willing to turn away the years of friendship and values money more. I would also feel mad for allowing myself to be taken advantage of by someone I value and trust like family not just as a friend.

Also, would feel betrayed because I do not think that money holds more value then the years and experiences invested in a friendship. I would be so mad if I try to reach out to my friend by text or phone and do not get any type of response especially If I am trying to get ahold of them to find a solution to pay me back that I lent them.

If they decide no never to pay me back the money I lent to my friend when they needed help, I think I would also no longer speak to them afterward. I think the best way to avoid this type of situation is to help your friend with a reasonable small amount that you are willing to help with.

This way you are not risking losing a lot of money even with it feels like a gamble when you lent it out and your intention will feel good because you're able to help even in a small way.
sr. member
Activity: 2618
Merit: 439
Isn't there a record of transaction?  If it is transferred through bank or paid in cryptocurrency, there should be a record. $800 can't be paid in person and got forgotten.  It is either the friend don't want to pay at all or your cousin had forgotten it.

He should ask more information on when and how he was paid.  It is quite hard to jump into conclusion and believe what @OP just wrote.  Instead, it only conveys a message that in every money transaction, make sure that there is a proof of transaction either by writing that the person received the amount and should be signed.  This way confusion will be avoided.  
actually even if they have record and even how they wanted to seek for legal action , still they cannot because Bitcoin is banned in their country and letting the authority about the issue will only reflect against them .
and that is the reason why I believe that borrower is confident to deny His loan money because he knew that there is no other way to ask him to pay unless there is a physical action to deal with.
newbie
Activity: 391
Merit: 0
Shakespeare said in his Hamlet play, lend money to no one, borrow money from no one, if you, you will lose both money and friends. This is what I always try to follow.
jr. member
Activity: 80
Merit: 3
I think your cousin should try to forgive his friend and move on with his life. Forgiving does not mean forgetting or condoning what his friend did. It means letting go of the anger and resentment that are hurting him more than his friend. It means accepting what happened and learning from it. It means focusing on the positive aspects of his life and the people who truly care about him.

I think your cousin should also try to see the bright side of this situation. He may have lost 800 dollars, but he gained a valuable lesson. He may have lost a friend, but he found out who his real friends are. He may have been cheated, but he still has his integrity and dignity.
hero member
Activity: 1022
Merit: 667
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Ops you better learn from the experience pf your cousin and never make same mistake in your life,  borrowing people money is not a good financial practice unless you are rendering a lending service that comes with interests, but personal lending without any form of documentation is a bad practices and like i always said never borrow friends and family money that you can lose, because 90% pf them never pay back such loans and if care is not taken this can creat enmity between you and such individual.

I hard similar experience from a friend who hard some financial problems and run to me for help, the amount in question was not that much but he borrowed it from me any ways, and he even gace me pay back date but when the date elapsed my friend refused to pick my calls and refused to pay back, so since then I already leaned my lesson never to trust anyone with money, and if anyone is looking for were to loan money, they can approach the banks or other lending platforms if they have the collateral.

So ops you cousin have to man up and move on because such is life, and we all need to learn from the experience of others to avoid becoming victims in some things like this.
hero member
Activity: 574
Merit: 554
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Most times people refuse to render help to others because of past experiences. When you are treated wrongly by people you trust, trusting people becomes a problem. This victim will never give a loan to anybody again because of this ugly experience. Lending money is risky which is why it is important to seek collateral before the funds are issued. If you think you are close to the person that asking for collateral might be improper, then let there be a witness or guarantor. To limit such ugly occurrences, give out only what you can afford to lose.

My cousin is very broken mentally and can't share this with any of his family. He can't take any legal action because Bitcoin is not legal. My cousin keeps saying one thing my best friend cheated on me then I told her a lot that what happened happened don't worry about it anymore.
OP since Bitcoin is illegal in your country don't you think it is risky to keep using it? I know in some countries using Bitcoin is a serious offence that can lead to fines and even imprisonment. Now your friend will lose that money because he can't seek legal action. It will be better to obey the law than to become a victim of the law.
hero member
Activity: 630
Merit: 611
Your cousin should ask his friend for proof of payment. To prove whether he really has paid or not. This is why it is very important for us to always make all loan and repayment agreements accompanied by proof. be it physical or digital receipts. So that the track record can be evidence for us to make sure everything can't be fooled. I understand your cousin is feeling disappointed and maybe a little mentally battered for not even thinking that a friend could be a traitor and a shameless liar. Well this is a unique world. Sometimes enemies can be more trusted than friends. then it's better to make things that have passed as a lesson to be more careful in the future.
full member
Activity: 2170
Merit: 182
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I have been thinking for some time now to discuss some of our personal matters with all of you. I myself have been involved with Bitcoin for a long time and my cousin knows quite a bit about Bitcoin. Whenever I have any problem I discuss it with him and he gives me a lot of helpful words. I will discuss some personal matters of my cousin with you all. My cousin and his friend are studying in the same college. His best friend said to him what are you doing.  He said I have been involved in Bitcoin for a long time and his friend knew he traded in Bitcoin. Bitcoin He works hard and because of this hard work he is a successful trader. Seeing his success, his best friend requested him a lot and finally he agreed. The problem is that he had no capital. He borrowed about 800 dollars from my cousin. My cousin did not share this with anyone. His best friend worked hard enough in Bitcoin and now he is successful. So my cousin said friend pay me the 800 dollars you took from me. As soon as my cousin spoke, his best friend said, "Dude, I paid you 800 dollars long ago. He could not understand what to say as if he was losing his language after hearing this. My cousin just keeps saying one thing and if he doesn't pay me back the 800 dollars I won't have much financial loss but I can't trust anyone else who did this to me I will never forget it. My cousin is very broken mentally and can't share this with any of his family. He can't take any legal action because Bitcoin is not legal. My cousin keeps saying one thing my best friend cheated on me then I told her a lot that what happened happened don't worry about it anymore.
Your cousin is your adviser  , but ending that he is stupid enough to lend a money to a So called best friend in which about crypto and it was illegal to your country, so this is the result of being stupid enough trusting people with money that has no collateral or no record at all.
sad to hear but your cousin is at the wrong decision here.
best not to fall from same trap again mate, goodluck to you and your cousin.
hero member
Activity: 1498
Merit: 711
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Despite that it took me long time to understand your narrative after reading consecutively to understand you. At last part of the story that the friend of your cousin said that it has paid your cousin long time ago" did you ask your cousin if it was owning the friend long time ago before your cousin borrowed the friend 800$" because someone you helped in business or in a trade to became successful and the person don't want to refund a money you gave to he or her to start up same business you are into, that means their is already issues that is happening between both which one person might be gotten, with the narration of this story that means that the friend of your cousin is ungrateful, but never conclude until you get information from your cousin friend before you conclude. What i will advice you is to render help to whom you are pleased to.
sr. member
Activity: 1386
Merit: 406
Always follow certain safety and precautions in providing loan and then loan should be granted. No matter how much you lend to someone close to you, you must keep a document before the loan so that you can show that document later if he refuses to repay the loan. What happened here was that a friend gave a loan to another friend to help him and had enough faith and trust in him but later when the lender friend asked for his loan back the borrower friend refused to repay the loan. In this case, if the person who took the loan refuses, the person who gave the loan will have nothing to do because the person who gave the loan has not kept any kind of document regarding the loan. So no matter how much you give loan to your close people as it is financial matter always take security and then give loan.
legendary
Activity: 1666
Merit: 1037
The old saying goes; "Don't mix your friends with your money".

Unfortunately for the lender to a friend, lending is business and an additional good deed to help a friend. Unfortunately, it does not always reciprocate. In bad friendships, friends take this privilege unappreciated, like they are entitled to it, and most of the time will never pay it back. If the friend is appreciative and immediately works to repay the amount so that they are no longer indebted to the friend, maybe there are better chances.

A friend exploiting another out of some Bitcoin just because Bitcoin matters can not be handled in court should not mean that there are no consequences. If the supposed friend is not paying on purpose and out of greed (and this is 100% confirmed), why not just confront them for the money and see how much resistance they show to pay it back? Your cousin and yourself are entitled to do that if the supposed friend really is showing no signs of respecting the agreement.
full member
Activity: 952
Merit: 232
The case is complicated in that it can't even be resolved in a court of law for the sake that BTC is not recognized as legal tender.
I have been hearing a lot of money issues lately, that it seems like am the only person who has been more than careful in avoiding such loss.
Friends are only much good when there's no money lending, nor borrowing nor doing a business together. Money changes people and you would be shocked the meager amount that might server a long friendship bond.

Your cousin acted matured by letting the issue slide, but I can assure you that the said friend would loose more than the $800 soon, and he won't even understand how it happened.
legendary
Activity: 2422
Merit: 1083
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Not a very clear story though , but I supposed the confusion lies in the OPs inability make use of good English, maybe he is not from an English speaking region, then that's quite understandable..

Anyways, from what I understand, I would say that some people are like that, we cant completely trust people to keep to their words, most especially if they sometime had nothing, but after some time and help from maybe a friend, things turn around for good for them, it is important to expect some changes in their attitude and character , @op, for your cousin, I don't think there is anything he would have done even if bitcoin was legal in your country, he cant possibly arrest his own friend, where is the evidence that the friend is owing him?, even if he decided to drag the friend to court, there was never a written agreement between between the two, so there is also no evidence to nail him, he should just forget about it and move on, and also learn a lesson from it.
hero member
Activity: 1918
Merit: 564
Isn't there a record of transaction?  If it is transferred through bank or paid in cryptocurrency, there should be a record. $800 can't be paid in person and got forgotten.  It is either the friend don't want to pay at all or your cousin had forgotten it.

He should ask more information on when and how he was paid.  It is quite hard to jump into conclusion and believe what @OP just wrote.  Instead, it only conveys a message that in every money transaction, make sure that there is a proof of transaction either by writing that the person received the amount and should be signed.  This way confusion will be avoided.  
sr. member
Activity: 602
Merit: 442
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I’m quite confused on your narrative. So you are telling that your cousin lend his best friend his money and his friend becomes successful trader. You didn’t mention how long did his friend borrowed the money and you just concluded in the end that your cousin ask his best friend for a payback now that he is successful.

Then what happened?

What happened  next is that his brother will never trust any other of his friends neither will he ever lend out money to others but whatever the case might be, it is always very hard for friends and families payback debts because at the end of the day, you wouldn't want to take any very drastic actions against them but rather turn to be at their mercie.

If I understand correctly, your cousin's friend lacked the capital to invest in Bitcoin, and your friend assisted him by providing $800 for the investment. However, when your cousin requested the borrowed amount to be returned, the friend denied owing anything and falsely claimed to have already repaid your cousin. If this account is accurate, it is indeed disheartening. It highlights the difficulty in trusting others with financial matters. This incident is not specifically related to Bitcoin; rather, it reflects the importance of basic human decency in repaying borrowed funds. It serves as a valuable lesson for both you and your cousin to exercise caution when entrusting anyone with your money.
Exactly  and I solely do agree with you but I think despite the fact that bitcoin  isn't accepted in your country, I think there are other ways he can get his money back but the first step is to open up to family and friends and possibly  going to his friend's family so he can come with prove of repayment at least a receipt of transfer is prove enough.
hero member
Activity: 2044
Merit: 784
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Very confusing story, but what I got from this is that your cousin should be more careful with who he considers to be his best friend, as a friend would never cheat on us. If he doesn't have money to pay back, he will find a way to not prejudice us, because a friend would never want to see us in trouble, as it will hurt him as well to know he put someone he cares in a bad situation.

I fear this money is already lost, as no formal agreements were made on the lending operation. Your cousin was scammed and has to move on now. If you are going yo lend money any time soon, make sure to have a collateral as guarantee.
hero member
Activity: 812
Merit: 560
The problem is that he had no capital. He borrowed about 800 dollars from my cousin.

First wrong move, they used to say two cannot be wrong, which means two wrongs cannot make right, he made a mistake without knowing by asking for loan from your cousin while your own cousin made the worst mistake to crown it all by granting him the request, here he may thought he helped him but at the end it's not what he will ever be grateful for, bitcoin should be earned or exchanged for something valuable, he would have learnt about bitcoin and wait to have enough resources to use for holding bitcoin.

So my cousin said friend pay me the 800 dollars you took from me. As soon as my cousin spoke, his best friend said, "Dude, I paid you 800 dollars long ago.

Since there's no surety or third party to witness the transaction that wet between the two of them, we cannot blame anyone because it's possible he had paid but his friend has forgotten, but if he knew he never paid but insisted to have paid, your cousin shouldn't worry, law of karma will soon bounce back on him, your cousin aleo have learnt the best learning of his life not to lend out what he can't afford to loose.
legendary
Activity: 2408
Merit: 2226
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If I understand correctly, your cousin's friend lacked the capital to invest in Bitcoin, and your friend assisted him by providing $800 for the investment. However, when your cousin requested the borrowed amount to be returned, the friend denied owing anything and falsely claimed to have already repaid your cousin. If this account is accurate, it is indeed disheartening. It highlights the difficulty in trusting others with financial matters. This incident is not specifically related to Bitcoin; rather, it reflects the importance of basic human decency in repaying borrowed funds. It serves as a valuable lesson for both you and your cousin to exercise caution when entrusting anyone with your money.
sr. member
Activity: 1008
Merit: 366
Money destroys relationships. I still believe this and act based on this. You are good as long as you are providing them with money. The moment you ask for the money or refuse to give them the money in the first place, you are bad to them. I have faced this many times and I am someone who will not ask for that money back. For this, I have suffered a lot. People still owe me money, I never ask that back. Now I just make up an excuse to not give them any.

People are just so much ungrateful and greedy these days. Your cousin made a mistake. Now all he/she can do is just leave that and move on. That friend who took that money will lose double the amount one day. this is how the world works. Nature loves balance and that will be achieved one day. Take good care of your cousin and seek mental help if necessary. Depression is not a light thing. It could ruin life. So make sure your cousin does not walk that path. Also, tell him/her to avoid such people in the future.
hero member
Activity: 784
Merit: 672
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I have been thinking for some time now to discuss some of our personal matters with all of you. I myself have been involved with Bitcoin for a long time and my cousin knows quite a bit about Bitcoin. Whenever I have any problem I discuss it with him and he gives me a lot of helpful words. I will discuss some personal matters of my cousin with you all. My cousin and his friend are studying in the same college. His best friend said to him what are you doing.  He said I have been involved in Bitcoin for a long time and his friend knew he traded in Bitcoin. Bitcoin He works hard and because of this hard work he is a successful trader. Seeing his success, his best friend requested him a lot and finally he agreed. The problem is that he had no capital. He borrowed about 800 dollars from my cousin. My cousin did not share this with anyone. His best friend worked hard enough in Bitcoin and now he is successful. So my cousin said friend pay me the 800 dollars you took from me. As soon as my cousin spoke, his best friend said, "Dude, I paid you 800 dollars long ago. He could not understand what to say as if he was losing his language after hearing this. My cousin just keeps saying one thing and if he doesn't pay me back the 800 dollars I won't have much financial loss but I can't trust anyone else who did this to me I will never forget it. My cousin is very broken mentally and can't share this with any of his family. He can't take any legal action because Bitcoin is not legal. My cousin keeps saying one thing my best friend cheated on me then I told her a lot that what happened happened don't worry about it anymore.

I think such people are always there to teach us some lessons that everyone in this world can't be trusted and your cousin's friend also did something that only a scammer would do. He took money from your cousin when he needed money, and now when he is financially stable, he just take U-turns and falsely says that he had already paid him that $800 dollar which he borrowed when needed.

You should tell you cousin that there are always such kind of people who take advantage of one's generosity and take U-turns by say false words and lies to convince other that they have already done them a favor when they needed it, or totally ignore the people who favored them. I think those people really don't have any morals because they can sell their soul for money, and they don't really care about someone's goodness, or about someone's emotions that they hurt with their behavior.

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