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Topic: Am i bad to this friend if i refuse to loan him some money in bad economy - page 2. (Read 977 times)

hero member
Activity: 1652
Merit: 723
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What I will advise anyone who is into cryptocurrency investment especially Bitcoin investment is that when investing your money in Bitcoin we should do know that investment is all about determination and it might go negatively or positively during the investment so what we have to do is to conscious to understand they can of investment that will give us a profit, I did not tell you not to invest but that's what I've been thinking that you have to have before you invest it don't not necessarily mean that at any point in time you have to use your funds to invest always,  I dispute such.
member
Activity: 210
Merit: 36
Basically in this bad economy, things has really gotten so hard for everyone, most people are so hard right now, it’s really difficult for most people to lend a money to anyone at this time. You may even be doing a favor of saving your friendship, because sometimes paying back can really be difficult, matters might escalate and at some case leads to violence. So you don’t have to be hard on yourself for not lending. You have all the right to say no, it’s your choice to want to help. For me they are some of my friends I wouldn’t hesitate to help if I’m capable of helping out at any given time, I just feel like it depends on the kind of relationship that you have going on. I can’t go about lending money to all my friends, also it depends on the situation the person is asking the money for, if it’s a critical situation I wouldn’t mind giving them my help and if my mind tells me to help I will help.
 Don’t feel bad for not helping your friend, you had your reason you can’t break your bank just for someone. If I didn’t help you at a point of need, it’s either I don’t have or I’m also in need of money or going through something bigger than yours, so it’s not really compulsory to please a friend just to displease yourself. Be considerate but then put your self first in every situation. You should be able to tell your friends how to make better decisions instead of trying to impress.


You're absolutely right man, this topic reminds me about what happened the previous day.my elder brother took a loan form, and he ask me to sign as the guarantor, mean while he has not been of help to me and both the family as well, whenever time I seek for help from him, he always turn me down,considering this whole thing I regretted signing as his guarantor in the first place. however there's this saying that don't allow your past to affect your future,so haven't known this and he really need the money to clear some bills, so in this case I'm the only person who is in the right position to help him,then I decided to sign for him as the guarantor regardless to what happened in the past.
sr. member
Activity: 182
Merit: 120
In my opinion, I think you should lend he/her the money but you also should be wise when loaning someone money mostly when it has to do with friendship, money can ruin a friendship so it's best you think twice first before making any decision, secondly from my thought the money should not affect your bitcoin accumulation, or if you're talking the money from your bitcoin investment is wrong, actually I don't like the idea taking out your money from your investment. If the issue is so critical you can recommend a loan app.
hero member
Activity: 2366
Merit: 793
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One of my primary principle is never collide relationship with money that will always end up bad which I learned from life experiences so I will make myself clear if I don't want to help whoever it is because it can affect me financially then it's okay but basically I don't help in the name of loan, if I am giving money to anyone who is in real need then I really consider it as charity and I never expected that to be returned.
jr. member
Activity: 252
Merit: 1
He needs to Apply for a Credit Card or something.
sr. member
Activity: 798
Merit: 364
Hey my fellow forum members, so I encountered a situation with a friend recently which taught me a lot of lessons, and also made a great reminder for me to keep holding Bitcoin rather than buying unnecessary items that don't have interest and value and depreciate.

This whole event taught me a great lesson that, instead of eating and spending your money as a newbie, there is a better chance of holding Bitcoin,  because in the future you have financial freedom.

What are your thoughts let learn together.

This thing can not work for everyone. Majority you are seeing out there really want to invest too but I also don't subscribe to idea of investing when you are struggling of what to eat. Don't starve yourself simply because you are thinking about the future because the future itself belongs to those who are healthy. Take good care of yourself by eating well and dress nicely before thinking of investing. I understand you don't need to be absolutely balanced before investing but at least, you shouldn't be suffering too much. Again, investment doesn't keep you immune to financial challenges. In fact, sometimes it will consume your investment and savings and you'll have to seek for help too.

Concerning lending your friend money, it's at your own discretion to either borrow him or not but one thing is that you called him a friend and we don't know how solid your friendship is but regardless of your closeness, our ability to make things easier for people we call our own when we have the means is what make us human. Borrowing him the money if you wish will certainly pass a message to him about the importance of investing. The lesson has been learned already and you can easily school him about investing and why it's necessary.
legendary
Activity: 2716
Merit: 1225
Once a man, twice a child!
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... but what's so hard about just saying, I still can't pay it at the moment. I think words like that are enough for me to hear. and friendships that have been built for a long time will not be destroyed just because of unresolved debts.
Yes, money isn't everything but it's a critical part of man's life. Again, not speaking out or relating to one's creditors can make the creditors conjure up any thinkable. A man who is in debt isn't free with his expressions because whatever he says or does will always be misinterpreted by his creditor(s). If only debtors know that the integrity test is heavier on them to prove themselves honourable than it's on creditors not to act brashly. I get your point though and I believe debtors should maintain the same humility they implored asking for loan when paying back or explaining their inability to pay pack as and when due.
newbie
Activity: 3
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As a trader u don't need to put your money in a place that won't bring profit never the less investing in Bitcoin is one of best ideas as a trader. As a friend spending with out investment should not make you feel bad when your friends decline borrowing you money Because u waisted money all by yourself with out thought of investing..
hero member
Activity: 1428
Merit: 653
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You should look from your charity account and send to him I know it's very hard but those who aren't belong to this world would never know how to invest money rather they thinks about savings and savings doesn't yield money to our bank account rather we keep tempering our savings making it to lose value. The main point is your friend never understand the power of investment rather he only knew how to spend and then rely on his salaries.
full member
Activity: 322
Merit: 211
 Basically in this bad economy, things has really gotten so hard for everyone, most people are so hard right now, it’s really difficult for most people to lend a money to anyone at this time. You may even be doing a favor of saving your friendship, because sometimes paying back can really be difficult, matters might escalate and at some case leads to violence. So you don’t have to be hard on yourself for not lending. You have all the right to say no, it’s your choice to want to help. For me they are some of my friends I wouldn’t hesitate to help if I’m capable of helping out at any given time, I just feel like it depends on the kind of relationship that you have going on. I can’t go about lending money to all my friends, also it depends on the situation the person is asking the money for, if it’s a critical situation I wouldn’t mind giving them my help and if my mind tells me to help I will help.
 Don’t feel bad for not helping your friend, you had your reason you can’t break your bank just for someone. If I didn’t help you at a point of need, it’s either I don’t have or I’m also in need of money or going through something bigger than yours, so it’s not really compulsory to please a friend just to displease yourself. Be considerate but then put your self first in every situation. You should be able to tell your friends how to make better decisions instead of trying to impress.
sr. member
Activity: 742
Merit: 275
What are your thoughts let learn together.


There are several stories of friendship that have been broken apart due to loans that haven’t been repaid. You’re not a bad friend if you refuse to loan him the money. Irrespective of the fact that the reasons for the loan is not life threatening, it’s your money and up to you to decide whether to loan him the money or not.
You’ve got a goal. Anything that would want to hinder your plans from attaining your goal would be frowned upon and would not be welcomed.

It’s your money and no one should pressure you in guise of friendship to part with money you don’t want to. Nevertheless, sacrifices are required in true friendship.
sr. member
Activity: 952
Merit: 275
If it's not an emergency then do a part, you don't have to give him the exact amount he is asking for, and sometimes it's smart to say no, just to see some reactions, I've promised someone some money, he came, and ask for my help, and when the time was up, I make up some excuse that something new came up and I won't be able to help.

He took the news very well, and he said we humans make a plan and heaven either accepts or rejects it, this got me, and a few days later I told him I had the money all along, I just wanted to see his reaction.

If he is a bad fella he would probably react for not keeping my promise, this day I am not ready to break my sweat for ungrateful people, this world is full of them.
sr. member
Activity: 770
Merit: 445
Someone must know that you're capable of giving them a loan before they'll approach you for it,
Whenever some people notice you are living fine, maybe because they notice you have at least what an average person is suppose to have, then they will decide to approach you to ask for a loan, they don’t even care about how you are surviving. Some people don’t have much money, but they are satisfied with the little which they have, and they don’t go around begging people for money or other things.

Since the loan is not to save a life or make payment for an important emergency situation
If the loan is for emergency sake, then i don’t care selling my bitcoin investment just to help the person, but if what the person will be using the money for is not necessary, then I will apologize to the person that I don’t also have anything with me, I won’t even tell the person that I have invested my money, it doesn’t need any explanation, because after explaining, the person will still see me as bad person.
hero member
Activity: 2408
Merit: 584
Those who made the big decision to invest their money in Bitcoin last year will now have seen the value of their investment double in Bitcoin.
History never lies and we have seen how Bitcoin's 4 year halving cycle makes the price of Bitcoin soar quickly, and from OP's story, if only your friend had bought Bitcoin instead of buying expensive shoes or other luxury goods, his money would have doubled by now and he can buy more things, investing in bitcoin is really profitable, you have to be smart in managing your money, don't let momentary desires make you prioritize buying luxury goods rather than investing in bitcoin.
A lot of people don't know these things and they need guidance and understanding, however, they should be referred to places where they can learn more about Bitcoin and how it has been performing from the last decade and a half so that they can see how much potential it has and then maybe they will understand that instead of unnecessary shopping and buying branded cloths, shoes, and other stuff, they should invest some money in Bitcoin.

So, I don't blame them if they spend their money on such things because they don't know yet. However, if it's someone who knows about Bitcoin and is still doing that, then you can blame them for being careless and not taking a wise decision with their money and finances.
legendary
Activity: 2576
Merit: 1043
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Now I am profiting from my Bitcoin investments then and one of my colleagues is now in dear need of financial help, he needs some help, not life-threatening but money, and now I am not ready to loan him any money as long as it affects my overall Bitcoin holdings.
You're not bad. It's just that, you don't want to use your investment to give it to your friend as a loan. If I'm in that situation, I'll do the same as well.

You also said that it isn't a life-threatening problem, so I guess he can do something with that. He can just ask a loan on the bank, or on other people that he knows. I will not give any of my relatives any loan as well if that involves my overall holdings whether it is my crypto or stock holdings. Of course, it will be a different decision if it's life-threatening because there's a chance that I might liquidate all of my assets if that's the last option. You're not bad if you didn't gave your friend a loan. You're just aware that the bull market is coming, and you don't want to liquidate your holdings because you might miss those profits.

This whole event taught me a great lesson that, instead of eating and spending your money as a newbie, there is a better chance of holding Bitcoin,  because in the future you have financial freedom.

What are your thoughts let learn together.
It depends.

I mean you can eat outside, and spend your money into something that you want as long as you are not spending "ALL" of it on that. If you are spending all of your money into something that you don't really need then there's a problem with you. You can still eat outside or spend on things you want as long as you keep a portion of your money for investing whether it's on Bitcoin or whatever asset class it is. Don't deprive yourself too much just because you want to have money to invest with, and at least balance it. Smiley
sr. member
Activity: 686
Merit: 286
If a relationship is about money, or if a relationship ends because of money, think it was never meant for you. Money never builds relationships, and those built through money soon end. If your friend asks you to borrow money, it is entirely up to you whether or not to lend it. If you can't lend him money and if your friend breaks up with you because of it, you should express your satisfaction for him because you know him because of money. But if your friend is in extra danger and if you have enough money you can help him because if you stand by him during the danger he will remember your favor for the rest of his life. But this should be done only in case of emergency, if your friend asks you to borrow money for no reason then I think you should refrain from lending money to him.
full member
Activity: 784
Merit: 212
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At least say that you still can't pay back the loan money. because in reality I also didn't charge and wanted the money back because I saw that he was my good friend. but somehow he walked away and never had any contact with me again. Even when they meet on the street, they don't seem to know me.
There's a popular saying in my locality that the mannerism of asking for a loan isn't the same as when it's due to be paid back. It's that simple. The borrower goes to the lender and asks for a loan in a tone that makes them appear humble and dying 😅 but when they're asked for the repayment, the stupid ones among them will ask the lender why they're bothering them as if there aren't people who owe others. Some even would tell you that after all countries owe, let alone individuals like them. Some of these responses would leave one wondering why one helped out in the first place. I've had my share of this. It pains me that some people neglect the essence of friendship once money issues come up.
That's right, even countries are in debt, let alone only the people who live in a country.
But as a friend, of course you won't be too concerned about the debt, which is actually not much compared to actual friendship. Maybe because he was embarrassed because he still couldn't pay back the loan money at that time. but what's so hard about just saying, I still can't pay it at the moment. I think words like that are enough for me to hear. and friendships that have been built for a long time will not be destroyed just because of unresolved debts.
Not venting here, but rather it's better to maintain friendship than money which isn't everything.
legendary
Activity: 2716
Merit: 1225
Once a man, twice a child!
~
At least say that you still can't pay back the loan money. because in reality I also didn't charge and wanted the money back because I saw that he was my good friend. but somehow he walked away and never had any contact with me again. Even when they meet on the street, they don't seem to know me.
There's a popular saying in my locality that the mannerism of asking for a loan isn't the same as when it's due to be paid back. It's that simple. The borrower goes to the lender and asks for a loan in a tone that makes them appear humble and dying 😅 but when they're asked for the repayment, the stupid ones among them will ask the lender why they're bothering them as if there aren't people who owe others. Some even would tell you that after all countries owe, let alone individuals like them. Some of these responses would leave one wondering why one helped out in the first place. I've had my share of this. It pains me that some people neglect the essence of friendship once money issues come up.
hero member
Activity: 3024
Merit: 680
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This is a hot topic on every community even in the working folks community. It's not that urgen that we give loan to anybody.

We shouldn't be forced and sacrifice our needs if ever someone is going to loan money from us. Just tell them that we're no bank and we have our own needs to cater.

It's simple as that and with that reason, that person won't ever approached you whether they'll take a loan or not and that's fine.
hero member
Activity: 546
Merit: 516
Back to the story:
I made a thread here on the board on how my end-of-the-year Christmas bonus payment was used to buy Bitcoin instead of spending to buy new clothes as my friends and colleagues did back then.


Now I am profiting from my Bitcoin investments then and one of my colleagues is now in dear need of financial help, he needs some help, not life-threatening but money, and now I am not ready to loan him any money as long as it affects my overall Bitcoin holdings.
Assuming you use the money to buy a house, will he ask you to sell your house and loan him the money? I guess he will not and that shows he has no regards for Bitcoin as an investment. You must stand your ground and treat your Bitcoin investment as though they are physical asset that will not be sold easily but held for a long time. This way you will be able to manage and protect it properly. I had once sold part of my Bitcoin to borrow money to a friend who even struggle to pay back after much quarrels and arguments and I ended up not putting the money back into Bitcoin. I'm not saying that helping friends is bad but it should not be at the expense of your own investment which you made for the sake of your future.
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