Wouldn't it be better as a Country Music Song rather than a Book ?
"Can't pay the rent, don't got an honest job, kids ain't mine..."
You throw in a truck that won't start and that's a hit on ANY Country Music Station.
Dude, you forgot somethings:
WELL, I WAS DRUNK THE DAY MY MOM GOT OUT OF PRISON
AND I WENT TO PICK HER UP IN THE RAIN
BUT BEFORE I COULD GET TO THE STATION IN MY PICKUP TRUCK
SHE GOT RUNNED OVER BY A DAMNED OLD TRAIN
As for the first verse, it goes something this this:
WELL, IT WAS ALL THAT I COULD DO TO KEEP FROM CRYIN'
SOMETIMES IT SEEMED SO USELESS TO REMAIN
BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO CALL ME PIRATE, PIRATE
YOU NEVER EVEN KNEW MY REAL NAME