OK, I'll bite.
For the first, I am very friendly, although I can be blunt at times, but then there's usually a reason for it. Mood levels may change during the day, and even during a week, or shock, during a certain month. But most of the time I am very friendly, interested, helpful and communicative, and I find that many people on this forum is just as helpful as myself.
As for the widespread public opinion, I think the widespread public doesn't even know about bitcoin yet. There's been some negative press, but thou shall not believe everything that the press says! I know a lot of bitcoiners, and I don't know a single pedophile! Neither do I know a single criminal, unless you judge me to be a criminal when I in my early days of being a poor student sometimes gambled that I didn't have to pay on the subway.
As for the DOJ and what they do, they don't have a worldwide power. Bitcoin, last time I checked, wasn't dependant on the US, although there's some significant amount of bitcoin businesses in the US.
Since bitcoin is a decentralized project, it's a community project, and as such it's not an enterprise, of this follows since it's not an enterprise that it's not an illegal enterprise. In fact, when we speak of illegality, I don't know of any jurisdiction where bitcoin is illegal.
When it comes to fucking, I must admit I've done this a few times in my life. Since I am not gay, I've preferred girls when it came to such activities. Sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's good to fuck, depending on who you do it with. Since I'm not flexible enough to do it with myself, I can at this point not comply with your demand. I am sorry, but it is not possible.
As for being a board idiot, I may at times carry a beard, if that makes me a board, I'm a little bit unsure of, but usually I'm not bored, I guess that makes me still not a board, or rather a board idiot. Since idiots usually have low IQ, I have a problem with that as well.
You are sure you do not want to try again ?