HOLY SHIT BALLS..............GAW IS A CULT!!!!!!
I am a church-goer too. In case you never heard it (I am sure many have, apologies to those who already know this story) my minister used to tell a story about a deeply faithful man living in a low-lying region prone to flooding. The National Weather Service issued a hurricane evacuation warning, telling all of the residents in that area to get out immediately. The man told his friends: "I trust in God to protect me, I will not leave my home."
As the storm came closer and a direct hit on the city was a virtual certainty, the Sheriff came by his house and knocked on his door. The man answered the door, and the Sheriff begged the man to leave, offering to take his possessions in the Sheriff's vehicle and to help him move out anything of sentimental value. But the man said: "I trust in God to protect me, I will not leave my home."
When the storm surge hit, flood forced the man to move into the second story of his home. The entire first floor became flooded, but the man was unperturbed. He simply moved to the second floor of his home and gave thanks go Jesus for his sturdy two-story home and his safety.
Later that day, rescuers came by in motorboats and tried to save the man. He refused to leave his home, saying: "My faith in God is complete. God will make me safe. Move along, I am staying put in my house with God at my side."
As the storm surge continued and winds increased, boats could no longer navigate the rising water and the man was forced to move onto his roof. He held on to the chimney to keep from being blown into the water. A Coast Guard helicopter appeared, and a daring rescue was attempted. The rescuer lowered himself in 50 mph winds to the man's roof and reached his hand out to the man. But the man again refused, saying: "God has provided a roof and a chimney to keep me safe. I will trust in God to protect me." And the helicopter was forced to leave without the man.
Later that day, the man was swept away by the 120 mph winds and drowned.
At the Gates of Heaven, the man appeared before God and asked politely: "God, I do not understand. I kept my faith in you completely. I believed in you. Why didn't you save me?"
"Silly man, " God replied, "I sent you warnings from the National Weather service, a Sheriff in a truck, a rescuer in a boat, and the Coast Guard in a helicopter, all to save your butt yet here you are anyway."
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So in that spirit, I give thanks to God for sending all of the fools to HT to buy my hashlets and get me out of that storm.
Peace,
8cyl