May be a good leader?
1. Hug and kiss your kids often
2. Spend as much time as you can with them
3. Don’t be afraid to admit you were wrong and apologize to your kids when you are. That shows them honesty and integrity.
4. Go on “dates” with them.
5. It is absolutely essential for dads to be in the lives of their kids, but especially from about age 8 on up. Boys learn how men should act, and girls learn how men should treat women by your example. Be a good example.
6. Make them do chores to earn allowances. No work, no pay. That’s how the real world works.
7. Read a LOT to them. Every night when they are young.
8. When you tell them “No”, mean it. Don’t be a parent who says “Stop, or I’ll say ‘stop’ again”. If you tell your kids “we’re leaving the park if you don’t stop fighting,” you have to leave the park if they keep fighting. Even if you don’t want to.
9. Put electronics away at meals. Eat dinner at the dinner table at least 3 times a week.
10. Dance with your toddlers. You will learn what true joy is doing that.
11. If you didn’t have a Dad in your life, join a men’s group at a church/synagogue/etc to learn from other men.
12. Read books on parenting. Some of it won’t work for your kids. Some of it will.
13. Read books on child development so that you know what a kid can do at each age.
14. Raise a child in faith for a moral background and to learn how to relate to others in a community. If you have no faith, find a Unitarian community. We learn how to be better people by supporting each other in bad times and good.
15. Pray (meditate, etc) often for your children and for wisdom for you.
16. Let kids get dirty.
17. Take lots of pictures. Kids grow up way too fast.
18. If you get so angry at your kids that you feel out of control (and trust me, you will), put the child and you both in time out (in separate rooms) until YOU cool off. Eat something if you’re hungry, too.
19. Toddlers WILL have tantrums. It will be worse if they are tired and/or hungry. Don’t try to do a lot when they’re tired and/or hungry. It’ll only make you frustrated.
20. Do chores around the house and make the kids help you. They will learn how to use drills, screwdrivers, build computers, wash clothes, and cook by doing it with you.
21. Each child is very different. What works for one won’t work for another and vice versa. That’s OK.
22. For newborns, buy a small bag of 3 different kinds of diapers. Find which one leaks the least and go with that brand. Don’t buy a lot of the newborn size. They’ll outgrow it in about 32 seconds.
23. The diaper brand that works best for one child may not work well for the next one.
24. If you make a promise to your kid, KEEP THAT PROMISE. They will learn to trust or not trust people based on that.
25. Make Christmas cookies and dye Easter eggs (or whatever your faith or family traditions are). There is much joy in seeing your child dump half a bottle of blue sugar on a cookie and then eat it.
26. Let kids fail. Don’t protect them from the consequences of their mistakes unless it would hurt them physically. The real world will hold them accountable. Your kids need to learn how to pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and fix their mistakes.
27. Love your kids.
28. Love your kids.
29. Love your kids.