Topic: Living ones life on assumption and promises - page 3. (Read 452 times)

The summary of what I think from the topic -
1. Do not trust anyone: People make promises to make you feel good and they my immediately regret it because they would have discovered that they can fulfill their promises but won't tell you. Instead they'll just ghost you.

2. Work hard and work smart for your money: Most times having your own momey and practicing financial prudence through hardwork and smart work  is far better than waiting on someone else because you will be their mercy.

3. Focus on what is in your control: Like your friend who went into gambling. Avoid it. You can't control that outcome. Instead focus on what you can control or is in your control not on luck or chance.

4. Have more than one option: If someone promises to give you money, never believe them. Look for other options so that if they fail you, you'd still be fine.

The only way to avoid assumptions and promises is not to rely on anyone or even risk our jobs as well as our assets because of false hopes. Verbal promises aren't always reliable and entrusting our fate to others could possibly result in a worse situation. People aren't always true to their words so it's better not to rely on their offers no matter how good they may sound.
Letting go of our jobs would be a wrong decision that we might commit because of others so we better be wise.

I agree with your opinion, it is true that we as humans must be able to walk on reality, not on false promises and uncertainty. Hoping for a promise, is indeed very confusing, sometimes the promise is actually fulfilled, but sometimes, the promise lies and is not kept. So all this stuff about promises is very confusing, makes the mind and heart to be confused. But what is certain, we as human beings with common sense, we should be able to choose more, between people who can be trusted and who cannot be trusted. Because if you keep repeating mistakes like you experienced, things like that will cause something negative and disappointing. And don't forget! we ourselves must always keep the promises we have made, so that we can be trusted by others, and are not called people who like to lie.

I agree with your opinion, it is true that we as humans must be able to walk on reality, not on false promises and uncertainty. Hoping for a promise, is indeed very confusing, sometimes the promise is actually fulfilled, but sometimes, the promise lies and is not kept. So all this stuff about promises is very confusing, makes the mind and heart to be confused. But what is certain, we as human beings with common sense, we should be able to choose more, between people who can be trusted and who cannot be trusted. Because if you keep repeating mistakes like you experienced, things like that will cause something negative and disappointing. And don't forget! we ourselves must always keep the promises we have made, so that we can be trusted by others, and are not called people who like to lie.

you should avoid such a method, if indeed the money is not in your hands because there is no certainty that you will get/manage the money.
I'd rather borrow if I really need money for something like that, rather than hear promises from people who aren't sure.

if you want a more secure path, don't rely on something that has not happened yet. it will give you so much trouble if you are relying on something that you must accomplish before that something happens. just like what the OP stated. lucky you if someone will bail you out of the terrible situation. one should always expect the worst case scenario so you are prepared for the battle you're about to face with.

Jean de La Fontaine has a fable called "The Bear and Two Comrades" the moral of which is that one cannot share the skin of an unkilled bear.
The whole story of the OP can be summed up under this moral, and surely people who can think sane need to understand that before you expect something, you need to do something that will lead to success. Relying on investments in Bitcoin, if you return to the idea of ​​a forum, and plan your ideas for the future, it will be wise only when the X-hour comes in profit. To do something earlier will sound exactly the same as the proverb about an unkilled bear.

The first example where your friend placed a bet is quite a common feeling for anyone who has been investing in companies a while or engaged in games like playing poker. There are situations that make it feel like you've already secured a win, but celebrating too early will lead to great heartbreak. There's an example in the gambling section of someone who placed a million dollar bet at 1.01 (odds the represent the player is extremely likely to win) and who ended up losing, so it could be a lot worse. The real moral is that even sure fire predictions can lead to major upsets, at least if you're doing something like buying shares in companies you have many opportunities to cash out on the way down, whereas gambling tends to be completely binary (you either win or lose immediately at the outcome).

Why should any individual be living on promises and assumptions when we know everyone can disappoint you at any point. Sometimes the disappointment can be intentional or due to situations not under their control. For example someone can promise you a job but later on, the job is no longer available because someone has given the job to another person and it might be his manager or a superior in the office that gave the job out.

We have to learn to only spend money we have at hand, it's okay to plan for money you're expecting but that should just be only plans and not spending it when it hasn't arrived. When you plan it helps you to spend wisely but never have an assurance on something that isn't in your possession yet

When humans like yourself make promises to you, just take it with a grain of salt, do not completely rely on it because it's possible that the promise won't be fulfilled, there are mamy people out there that are capable of doing what they promised on others but they somehow derive joy from seeing people begging for their mercy.  I have come to understand that you can lose yourself trying to make others do something for you, you gain more respect for yourself when you stop asking people for help and decide to fix all problems yourself, and believe in yourself.

Your advice to everyone is that nobody should assume or live on promises made to them because the person they are hoping for might end up disappointing them after they have assumed about the promises made to them.

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As I grow older, I get to find out that not all promises made to people are meant to be fulfilled. Some people make promises just to make you feel good without the motive of fulfilling them. So because of that, I tried to tell people around me to learn first how they can live without the assumption of someone's promises beforehand.

Situations like this can teach you a valuable lesson not to rely on someone's promise especially when you are both drunk the night you got the offer.  

An example about a friend who spends for an early celebration is very upsetting when he found out he actually didn't win, yet he already spend money for the celebration. I would probably share an amount just to cheer up that friend.

Yes, every week, maybe even every day, we are shown discussions that go round and round with different cases, but still the general orientation is the same, I am very tired of people like this.

OP who lives on assumptions and promises? even my stomach won't be full if you just brag about giving me food.
If you put money in that you don't necessarily get it is a stupid decision if you put it in a financial management and business budget plan, and even if you have experienced this incident many times before.

I feel stupid when I read your story.

That's true in business relationships because we can't tolerate anything to do with money owed even if it's family. Business will fall apart if it is mixed with family relationships. I have experienced this problem because I thought helping the family was an obligation so that in the end their debts piled up and could no longer be paid.

Whereas we have to increase capital to cover their debts and in the end the business we run will be destroyed without anything left. The business concept sometimes has to be cruel, where the portion of assistance to family, relatives and friends must be separated, unless our business strength has reached the stage of success and has many branches.

Money debts are mandatory in nature and there is no reason not to pay them off, even if it is to family, relatives or friends. This area will usually be gray when it comes to family and most people will end up badly in family relationships. It is better when you decide to give money, it is a gift, not a debt, so that there are no reciprocal obligations from the giver or recipient and the amount can also be adjusted according to our abilities.

when it comes to money we should be able to think more realistically and maybe there are some people you mentioned who easily believe what other people say, but people who use their logic will not easily believe what other people say,specially about money.

Finally you fixed your post OP! Well done. First I saw your post I ain't gonna read all that good thing you fixed it.

When it comes to money, promises and assumptions shouldn't be tolerated as they can assure you that they could pay you in right given day. Even if the one is asking is part of your family like your sibling. We always have instinct that he/she might not pay you after lending them money. If you have that mindset when it comes to lending money then don't do it, since it's your instinct that dictate that they might not pay you. Plus remember their situation like if they could actually pay you like his payroll is coming up. Then it could count as a proof for them to pay you. If you're are introvert and awkward in socializing it would be possible for you to not ask them for their debt from you which is not be tolerated for me. You borrowed money of course you'll return it.

I think need to improve on his writing formats, is very bulk reading his words. There is no space before paragraph and it affects my eyes while reading.

Please op edit your post and make some corrections to enable the reader to read fine, than just putting all words together without any line space or paragraph. However @stompix you made a very good point because scanning through the forum there were several post that says about same topic, maybe is the right time they starts using the search option for their topics to know if actually same topics have been raised.

You got the tabs mixed up, you wanted to go on lifecoachingtalk.org!

Seriously, these topics are really getting annoying, yeah we know this already, there are a ton of topics on the same subject, don't live your life in debt, don't live it on promises, don't risk money you don't have, don't be greedy, for god's sake, this is not some therapy forum!
Common, enough is enough at this point!

Living on assumption and promises is more like spending money you haven't received. People can make promises but how sure are you that the promise will be fulfilled.

I will give you #5000 on Monday, how sure are you that the money will come in on Monday? Promises and assumption has caused alot of people there job, imagine leaving your recent job because a friend promise to get you a better job. This may even cause someone his/her life if one base most of his/her lifestyle on promises and assumption.

I could remember when one of my friend put himself into serious debt believing he has already won a huge money from gambling. This was some year ago, match between Besiktas and Benfica. It was the last game of my friend's ticket. After 3 goal ahead by Benfica in the first half, he believed the game was over and Befica has won. He called us to celebrate. We started drinking and eating at a bar to celebrate this. After the end of the game, we were shocked as the game ended up in draw with 3- 3. This landed my friend into serious debt that took him some weeks to pay.

Similar stuff happened to me when I spend my finance school fee believing my salary will be paid in two days time but was shocked after the salary was prosponed due to some reasons. The school fee was needed urgently and this put me into serious issues but thanks to my friends who bailed me out. This same issue has happened to us once or twice in our journey of life.

Economically, this can affect our business. I have #300,000 to start a business. My Uncle promise to give me #200,000 to add to the business. Therefore,I made a plan of #500,000 for the biz. It was an agro business (livestock farming- piggery) so I start the business with my own capital. I acquire a portion of land and make some structures with all the #300,000 I have believing I will stock the farm with livestock with the money my Uncle promise me. This was a serious shock when my Uncle come up with stories and couldn't fulfill his promise. This render my plans useless. Remember I could have start the business with the #300,000 I have alone although in a smaller form. I have to get loan to balance up with this. If not for the loan my plans would have been highly be affected.

It's better for one to learn how to  plan on money at hand and not on promises and assumption.