Indeed, it raises the question of what the "lesson in trust" was supposed to be. Was it supposed to be that the community shouldn't doubt people or that they shouldn't blindly trust high profile members?
I think I can help clarify this just a bit. At the time the bet was made, the forum was full of people left and right arguing about things they didn't know the real answer to (a troll's paradise), one side claiming that payback would be impossible and another side claiming that Pirate was a saint. The original lesson was intended for people who threw trust at pirate and other "funds" so easily, hence the comical nature of a bet that size without escrow. In my mind at the time, I was hurting no one except for people who needed to be reminded to stop trusting people so easily. That logic was obviously flawed and I was soon to realize that when it cost people money in the process.
The major mistake I made was not sticking with the prank. I fell to temptation and flip-flopped on my original reasoning. I started to believe it would be possible for pirate to pay back (perhaps) and I got out of control. Once I realized that there was no turning back, that's when everyone noticed a bizarre change in my attitude. I'm not proud of it, I've had to do some serious thinking about my life, my personality, my attitude and what I'm even doing here, but I came to the conclusion that I was overworked, in a position of trust disproportionate to my level of maturity and responsibilities, and I quickly screwed it up. The whole "not keeping my word" part was because I honestly had no idea how to go about it. No one is sitting on that amount of money and I didn't stick to one side, as I said, I flip flipped in my own mind and I believe that that is the most serious part of my mistake. As others have mentioned, if I would have kept just being a dick it might have been openly accepted as a prank, but I didn't have the sense to do that and as people have noted, I was tempted to try and make that situation into something that would also help my then poor financial situation. It was stupid of me, it was dishonest, it was something I'm not proud of, and it's a situation I won't let myself get into again.
I was raised a Christian and still have many of those same values in my life. I believe in sharing, I believe in forgiveness and I believe in making right on things you have done wrong. In my heart I knew I had to make things right once I learned of the magnitude of my mistake, but I was embarrassed and scared and didn't know how to clean up the large mess I made, as it was then something I could no longer control. This doesn't mean I'm a scammer, that I spend my nights and days looking for ways to cheat people for easy money, or that I am unfit for society. I work hard and always have, and I my anxiousness to be a part of something and lead (overzealousness?) is also misinterpreted as a sign of a scammer by some. It most certainly does mean that I did not put enough thought into my actions, that I was tempted with greed, and that I failed that temptation along with failing to understand the consequences of my actions beforehand. Looking back it seems so simple what I did and how it was so wrong. I just wish I would have had the sense to have steered clear when everyone was warning me at the time. I feel so stupid.
In short, the "lesson" was originally that people shouldn't trust others when they make outrageous claims and put nothing behind it. I let it go to far and changed the nature of the bet by flip-flopping and that is where I ruined myself. I understand that, I'm sorry for that, and now I am trying to make amends for that.
