Topic: My next door neighbor continually masturbates every 2-3 hours in my garden... (Read 4864 times)

Place proximity shrapnel mines while you're at it.

And he's doing my roses in. I have nothing against jacking off and am in fact pro-masturbation, but his fucking cum reeks and often makes me feel sick. It's complete milky schwag and he continually coughs his guts up pretty much every-time he jerks off from 6 in the morning to midnight. He coughs so violently that I've heard him puke several times. My windows are always shut yet his coughing still gets in along with his smelly vile cum. What do I do? If I ask him to stop doing it, I doubt he will. Do I threaten him with the police if he refuses? I don't want to do that, but this shit is making me feel physically sick, especially when he barfs. He lives with his grandmother who has hated me since I was a child. She even attacked me on one occasion for no reason what-so-ever. I don't mind her grandson masturbating as long as I can't smell it or hear him coughing or ruin my roses. He also has a 1-2-year-old goat and often leaves it in the house whilst he goes outside to whack the monkey. I can hear the goat crying and screaming whilst he's outside. He's a stupid skinny degenerate thieving Jeremy Kyle reject chav. I also believe I could kick the living shit out of him if it came to it, but I'm a pink-tutu-wearing pacifist and will only fight if I'm attacked and there's no other options.

And who the fuck actually gets addicted to masturbation? I mean seriously.

Wut do? Please advise.

Haha, very funny. Always appreciate parody  .

Oh, and it's masturbation   .

And he's doing my roses in. I have nothing against jacking off and am in fact pro-masterbation, but his fucking cum reeks and often makes me feel sick. It's complete milky schwag and he continually coughs his guts up pretty much every-time he jerks off from 6 in the morning to midnight. He coughs so violently that I've heard him puke several times. My windows are always shut yet his coughing still gets in along with his smelly vile cum. What do I do? If I ask him to stop doing it, I doubt he will. Do I threaten him with the police if he refuses? I don't want to do that, but this shit is making me feel physically sick, especially when he barfs. He lives with his grandmother who has hated me since I was a child. She even attacked me on one occasion for no reason what-so-ever. I don't mind her grandson masterbating as long as I can't smell it or hear him coughing or ruin my roses. He also has a 1-2-year-old goat and often leaves it in the house whilst he goes outside to whack the monkey. I can hear the goat crying and screaming whilst he's outside. He's a stupid skinny degenerate thieving Jeremy Kyle reject chav. I also believe I could kick the living shit out of him if it came to it, but I'm a pink-tutu-wearing pacifist and will only fight if I'm attacked and there's no other options.

And who the fuck actually gets addicted to masterbation? I mean seriously.

Wut do? Please advise.