Seriously, they got me confused there!
Read this book
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Art_of_Loving“Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an ordination of character which determines the relatedness of the person to the whole world as a whole, not toward one object of love”“If a person loves only one other person and is indifferent to all others, his love is
not love but a symbiotic attachment, or an enlarged egotism.”
“Love is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision.”
“Love isn't something natural. Rather it requires discipline, concentration, patience, faith, and the overcoming of narcissism. It isn't a feeling, it is a practice.”
“Paradoxically, the ability to be alone is the condition for the ability to love.” [compassion for oneself is the prerequisite of compassion for another]
“Infantile love follows the principle: "I love because I am loved."
Mature love follows the principle: "I am loved because I love."
immature love says: "I love you because I need you."
Mature love says: "I need you because I love you.”
― Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
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The human world breaks down into opposing forces: knowledge and ignorance, compassion and apathy, kindness and cruelty, wisdom and folly, reason and superstition, pleasure and suffering.
The suffering of one is the suffering of all. The pleasure of one is the pleasure of all. Such is the reality a loving mind dictates.