1. Satoshi Nakamoto will be Time magazine's Man of the Year
2. Mad Money's Jim Kramer will recommend going long Bitcoin. Price will immediately plummet.
3. Thailand, which is the only country to so far to outright ban Bitcoin, will be purchased by an early adopter and renamed Alpacastan.
4. We will have so many new All Time High parties that we'll become alcoholics and check en masse into a rehab clinic in Malibu that accepts bitcoin
5. Lamborghini will have to retool for mass production.
6. Paul Krugman will find his true calling as a clown for kid's birthday parties
7. Sir Richard Branson will report seeing a choo choo train from his spaceship window.
8. Mining difficulty will increase by warp factor eleventeen.
9. Lazlo will attempt to return his pizza for a full refund.
and...
10. Gavin will give a presentation on cryptocurrencies to the Ku Klux Klan, the Church of Satan and NAMBLA.
This is fucking hilarious.
lmao