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Topic: Make me laugh for a bitcent - page 15. (Read 36201 times)

newbie
Activity: 9
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 07:56:20 PM
#60
So, the Israeli rowing team was having real problems.
In every competition, they'd come in last.
So one year they decided to send Irving to the U.S.
To spy on the Americans
And find out the key to success.

Irving went to America.
He went to Cambridge
And studied to U.S. rowing team
Very closely.

The next year
Irving returned to Israel
To give his report.

Well, said the captain,
What did you find out?

The boat is the same, said Irving.
The oars, exactly the same.
They got 13 guys,
Just like we do.

Except
12 of them row
and only one of them yells.
newbie
Activity: 9
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 07:49:59 PM
#59
Michelle Bachman
hero member
Activity: 602
Merit: 500
June 29, 2011, 07:30:59 PM
#58
Confirmed.  And appreciated Wink

There once was a guy named Dave

Who found a dead whore in a cave

She was ugly as shit, and missing one tit

But think of the money he'd save!
Bitcent sent.
newbie
Activity: 54
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 07:20:30 PM
#56
Oh, and provided you appreciate British humour, this is fantastic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAG39jKi0lI ("My blackberry is not working", approx 3mins long)
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1005
June 29, 2011, 06:19:16 PM
#55
Some of my favorites from today's catchup of the site...
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newbie
Activity: 54
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 06:04:42 PM
#54
Charley, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on time.

Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their "Older Person Friendly" policies.

One day the boss called him into the office for a talk.
"Charley, I have to tell you, I like your work ethic, you do a bang-up job, but your being late so often is quite bothersome."

"Yes, I know boss, and I am working on it."
"Well good, you are a team player. That's what I like to hear.
It's odd though your coming in late. I know you're retired from the Armed Forces. What did they say if you came in late there?"












(scroll down..... .............)













"They said, "Good morning, Admiral, can I get you coffee, sir?"
newbie
Activity: 4
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 02:47:15 PM
#53
https://i.imgur.com/CB07r.jpg
16yLQTF3vnv5HQfL1FCQooR4RzEKxjqKvH
full member
Activity: 161
Merit: 100
June 29, 2011, 02:05:13 PM
#52
Quote
Bitcent sent.
Here is bonus one..
hero member
Activity: 576
Merit: 514
newbie
Activity: 52
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 12:49:31 PM
#50
So this old couple get done smoking a joint and start watching some tele when the old guy gets the hankering for some ice cream. He gets up and starts walking off when his wife starts asking him what he is doing.
"I am getting ice cream to help parch my throat, would you like me to get you some dear?"
"Yes, but I want whip cream, a cherry, sprinkled nuts, and some chocolate syrup. I know you, you will forget, so you better write this down and take it with you."
Knowing his wife is ever nagging he rushes off to the kitchen with the complaints of how easy something like that can be to remember.
The husband is in the kitchen for close to 20 minutes. The wife starts to get irritated at the loud commotion of pots and pans coming from kitchen. Just when she is ready to pipe up and complain the husband returns, tray in hands.
He sets it down on her lap and says, "See woman, what did I tell you, I did not forget a thing!"
She looks down at her plate of eggs, bacon, and toast and looks up at her husband and responds, "I knew you should of written it down, you forgot my orange juice!"
newbie
Activity: 52
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 12:48:05 PM
#49
What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch?

You call him Names.
newbie
Activity: 14
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 12:01:09 PM
#48
Another of my favorites, the funniest blog ever Smiley

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/
newbie
Activity: 51
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 11:36:51 AM
#47
I have recently discovered this site: http://survivingtheworld.net/
Makes me laugh. Here are a couple good ones:
http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson990.html
http://survivingtheworld.net/Recitation98.html
full member
Activity: 167
Merit: 100
legendary
Activity: 882
Merit: 1001
June 29, 2011, 09:04:12 AM
#45
I chuckled at a couple of them.
newbie
Activity: 10
Merit: 0
June 29, 2011, 08:53:26 AM
#44
Did u finally laughed or not
full member
Activity: 140
Merit: 100
June 29, 2011, 08:48:06 AM
#43
I'm noticing a lack of observational comedy in this thread.
legendary
Activity: 882
Merit: 1001
June 29, 2011, 08:38:41 AM
#42

14fra8rHH3sa4VJg6gCUtea6PscwgejV2E
Bitcent sent.
legendary
Activity: 882
Merit: 1001
June 29, 2011, 08:37:59 AM
#41
Should I send to the address in your sig?
Sweet, that works with me Smiley


As a thanks, some bonus laughs.  Some classic adventures of Dog Fort





Bitcent sent.
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