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Topic: Man wakes up to girlfriend biting off his junk (Read 1404 times)

legendary
Activity: 2912
Merit: 1386
February 24, 2015, 01:36:59 PM
#23
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad

1.  Strike up conversation on Internet with hot Phillipine girl
2.  Go to visit.  Land in Manilla, take small plane to remote island.  Then take boat to island with girl.  Bring case of decent wine.
3.  Take ridiculous old THING that was once a truck down crazy roads to small village.  
4.  Feast eyes on hot girl and on nice Internet satellite comm system.
5.  Negotiate with village chief for girl.  Agree to three bottles of wine and a pig.
6.  Find a pig and buy it, complete transaction with village chief.
8.  Stop for lunch on way out at the regional Communist stronghold.  They have good lunch I heard.  Agree with them that they are hip.  Agree with them that the guerrillas are bad.  Tip well.
9.  Bring girl back to the US. 
10.  Start wishing you were back with her on that island.
11.  DO NOT attempt to do this multiple times while with first girl.
sr. member
Activity: 308
Merit: 250
( -_・)ノ-=≡[$(∞)$]
Dick eating sindrom, i repeat DICK EATING SINDROM!!

Almost as bad as the incorrect spelling syndrome.    Roll Eyes

Haha, I forgot how to spell syndrome correctly.
Sorry man, im not from an English speaking country.
hero member
Activity: 742
Merit: 526
What a fucking bitch, hope she gets a long prison sentence.
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad
Well propably only 0.001% of the girls are psycotic enough to do this. If you want to feel safe order a Russian/Thai bride and treat her decently Wink

Having a Russian for a bride would make me even MORE paranoid.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/russia/7866824/Russia-spy-Anna-Chapmans-husband-I-thought-I-knew-her.html

Fuck you I'm not marrying a sleeper agent! In more ways than one! lol Tongue

At least she didn't stab him in the back (or tried to bite his dick off). The lesson to take home from this story - never trust beautiful women, and beware of redheads!
legendary
Activity: 1540
Merit: 1000
What a fucking bitch, hope she gets a long prison sentence.
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad
Well propably only 0.001% of the girls are psycotic enough to do this. If you want to feel safe order a Russian/Thai bride and treat her decently Wink

Having a Russian for a bride would make me even MORE paranoid.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/russia/7866824/Russia-spy-Anna-Chapmans-husband-I-thought-I-knew-her.html

Fuck you I'm not marrying a sleeper agent! In more ways than one! lol Tongue
sr. member
Activity: 476
Merit: 500
I like boobies
Of course he woke up! Tongue
hero member
Activity: 490
Merit: 500
What a fucking bitch, hope she gets a long prison sentence.
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad
Well propably only 0.001% of the girls are psycotic enough to do this. If you want to feel safe order a Russian/Thai bride and treat her decently Wink
legendary
Activity: 3906
Merit: 1373
Dick eating sindrom, i repeat DICK EATING SINDROM!!

Almost as bad as the incorrect spelling syndrome.    Roll Eyes
sr. member
Activity: 308
Merit: 250
( -_・)ノ-=≡[$(∞)$]
Dick eating sindrom, i repeat DICK EATING SINDROM!!
Pif
member
Activity: 153
Merit: 18
Ouch...wtf... I feel the pain.
legendary
Activity: 1764
Merit: 1000
That lady must be hungry and mad and a little bit crazy  Smiley Why on earth would she  bite off her boyfriend's dick over an argument?
Be very careful next time on each girl your going to go home with Smiley
sr. member
Activity: 1176
Merit: 297
Bitcoin © Maximalist
damn does late nite cravings
legendary
Activity: 3906
Merit: 1373
She forgot to brush her teeth first. He's gonna get infection for sure now.   Grin
legendary
Activity: 1162
Merit: 1001
Wttttfff. No way else to take out your anger on your SO besides biting his dick off? God damn woman
sr. member
Activity: 560
Merit: 257
Can just see how this argument went

Your so needy I am going to sleep on the couch leave me alone.

Wakes up to needy bitch biting his dick off.
legendary
Activity: 1568
Merit: 1001
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad
Women are typically the last people you want to piss off cause there's nothing like the wrath of a woman scorned - so don't cross them is a good piece of advice. Retribution and vengeance happen when you're messing with the wrong one. Luckily, I've never had any of those types as I've always tended to be picky and I certainly am even more picky of the ones that I'd be willing to sleep with and always keep my business piece wrapped up cause I damn for sure don't want any kids or related baggage.
legendary
Activity: 1540
Merit: 1000
lol doesn't matter Tongue also, I'm an Anarchist ffs, of course I'm against people trying to declare certain freedom of expression is morally wrong, which is what homosexuality falls under.
legendary
Activity: 3906
Merit: 1373
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad

All this time I have been thinking you were a girl, or are you?   Cheesy

WTF?! I'm not a girl! LOL! Why else would I post in the hot asian girl thread?!

How would I know? Some girls do things like that at times. For example, the joint (though he probably is not a girl, either) is adamantly against anyone who even suggests that homosexuality is wrong.

Smiley

EDIT: Sorry about my mistake.
legendary
Activity: 1540
Merit: 1000
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad

All this time I have been thinking you were a girl, or are you?   Cheesy

WTF?! I'm not a girl! LOL! Why else would I post in the hot asian girl thread?!
legendary
Activity: 3906
Merit: 1373
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad

All this time I have been thinking you were a girl, or are you?   Cheesy
legendary
Activity: 1540
Merit: 1000
You do realise all these articles coming out of psychotic and violent girlfriends is making it much harder for me to go out and find a girl right guys? I'd much rather stay single with all these stories I keep hearing about lol, it's come to a point now where if I ever meet someone new I'm just thinking "Please don't be a psychopath, please don't be a psychopath" Sad
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