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Topic: Parents need to bring back the belt! (Read 6186 times)

newbie
Activity: 56
Merit: 0
January 07, 2013, 06:24:37 PM
I am foggyb.  I approve of this thread.

Cool.
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1005
January 07, 2013, 04:57:58 PM
I'll just have to disagree with you on that.
Infringements of other people's rights are not a matter of opinion. A rapist can't avoid being evil by just choosing to disagree with the immorality of his action.
Without discipline, children do not learn properly.
That's a story you are making up to justify your preconceptions. I know this because any time the question has been investigated scientifically "discipline" is shown to do the exact opposite of aid learning.
Most/all of the "scientific" studies are full of people who HAVE been abused as a child, thus negating the findings of physical discipline as a whole.  Find me a study of corporeal discipline that specifically discludes those who had abusive punishments, and maybe I will think differently.

I agree with the author of this article as far as what is appropriate and not appropriate with regards to physical discipline: http://voices.yahoo.com/physical-discipline-children-15327.html
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1013
January 07, 2013, 04:36:39 PM
#99
I'll just have to disagree with you on that.
Infringements of other people's rights are not a matter of opinion. A rapist can't avoid being evil by just choosing to disagree with the immorality of his action.
Without discipline, children do not learn properly.
That's a story you are making up to justify your preconceptions. I know this because any time the question has been investigated scientifically "discipline" is shown to do the exact opposite of aid learning. It's particularly sadistic to hit children under the guise of help them learn when hitting in fact decreases their ability to learn. All it does is set up a no win situation in which the consequences of the abuse inflicted on them are used to justify more abuse.
full member
Activity: 238
Merit: 100
January 07, 2013, 04:32:35 PM
#98
Baby cage fight club.
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1005
January 07, 2013, 04:25:23 PM
#97
There's a big difference between spanking to punish and hitting to the point of abuse.  HUGE.
No difference at all. What right do you have to punish a child at all, much less for failures on your own part?

If your child is too young to not to run out into the street then that child is too young to be let outside of arm's reach in an unenclosed outdoor area. If the parent allows the child to get into a dangerous situation like being able to run into the street then if anyone it's the parent who deserves punishment, not the child.

Any form of punishment for disobedience is automatically abusive, because no one has the right to demand obedience from another person. Parents only get away with it because they are physically more powerful than their children.
I'll just have to disagree with you on that.  Parents exist to raise their children, and that includes teaching them through discipline.  Without discipline, children do not learn properly.
newbie
Activity: 42
Merit: 0
January 07, 2013, 03:31:48 PM
#96
Some kids just aren't nice to begin with. Believe it or not serial killers, wife beaters, rapists, and muggers were once children too. I would argue they received less discipline than more, and clinical trials tend to support that given children without fathers (traditional administer of discipline) are more likely to end up in prison. Its not like he is BEATING the child or even spanking him for his own enjoyment, he has tried being "nice" and it is not working. IMO not disciplining the child is a form of neglect he and many others will pay for in the future so that everyone involved doesn't have to make hard choices.

Not sure I agree with the bit about neglect, but the rest is pretty much dead on.
newbie
Activity: 42
Merit: 0
January 07, 2013, 03:29:00 PM
#95
so, my son's uncle is 3.5 years old.
and every single time they play together, he hits my son on the head with a toy or something...
His parents give him time-outs or wtv. but it doesn't work, he literately will go hit my son again 1 min later
So he smacked my son today, and I smacked him.  Kiss
this caused a bit of a fuse.... ya sure its not my kid and i shouldn't be disciplining him.... wtv... i got mad he got smacked, big deal.
its been like a year we keep explaining to him that what he's doing is "not nice" I'm fed up.
if it was my kid always hitting a smaller kid, I'd smack him!

"Parents need to bring back the belt!"

your thoughts...  Cheesy

The parents obviously are not using disincentives or punishment effectively to change their child's behavior.  You shouldn't have disciplined their kid, but if they know there's an established behavior problem with their child, they should be escalating punishment until the child's behavior changes.  Take away toys, don't allow the child to play with friends, isolate the child for an extended period (have to be careful here or it could be viewed as "psychological abuse").
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1013
January 07, 2013, 03:23:35 PM
#94
There's a big difference between spanking to punish and hitting to the point of abuse.  HUGE.
No difference at all. What right do you have to punish a child at all, much less for failures on your own part?

If your child is too young to not to run out into the street then that child is too young to be let outside of arm's reach in an unenclosed outdoor area. If the parent allows the child to get into a dangerous situation like being able to run into the street then if anyone it's the parent who deserves punishment, not the child.

Any form of punishment for disobedience is automatically abusive, because no one has the right to demand obedience from another person. Parents only get away with it because they are physically more powerful than their children.
legendary
Activity: 1400
Merit: 1005
January 07, 2013, 03:11:15 PM
#93
Anyone who hits a child to teach them that hitting is wrong is just having their own childish temper tantrum and needs to sit back and think for a second. That's like saying to your wife that that she shouldn't spend money while you are making some online purchases, that it is bad to eat chocolate cake as you stuff your face with cake, or telling someone that it is bad to kill people as you kill him.

This logical break is just terrible. If you make a rule you need to follow it. Kids are mirrors and absorb the behaviors exhibited to them. Kids that hit other kids have been taught that that is how you deal with people that frustrate you or don't give you what you want by their parents. The thought that parents would abuse their kids in the way is sickening. Imagine someone ten times your size beating you while telling you that beating people is wrong. Like what the hell is wrong with people who can't analyze this for 2 seconds before they act on it.
I don't think I'd spank if my kid hit someone, but for other actions instead.  Like if they're repeatedly disobeying me (perhaps running out into the street and refusing to come back, endangering themselves in the process).  I'd warn them that they'd get a spanking, then follow through with it if they were still defiant.  Next time they run out into the street and I warn them they'd get a spanking if they didn't come back, they'll probably come back.  Most kids don't care that they "could get hit by a car" if they've never seen or heard of that actually happening.  They're either too young to understand risks like that, or old enough to understand, but think "it won't happen to me".  Spanking, on the other can, is very real to them at either age.

I think if my kid had a problem with hitting people, I wouldn't be spanking them to teach any lessons - it is obvious that that is the wrong form of punishment for them.

There's a big difference between spanking to punish and hitting to the point of abuse.  HUGE.
full member
Activity: 132
Merit: 100
January 07, 2013, 09:30:46 AM
#92
Anyone who hits a child to teach them that hitting is wrong is just having their own childish temper tantrum and needs to sit back and think for a second. That's like saying to your wife that that she shouldn't spend money while you are making some online purchases, that it is bad to eat chocolate cake as you stuff your face with cake, or telling someone that it is bad to kill people as you kill him.

This logical break is just terrible. If you make a rule you need to follow it. Kids are mirrors and absorb the behaviors exhibited to them. Kids that hit other kids have been taught that that is how you deal with people that frustrate you or don't give you what you want by their parents. The thought that parents would abuse their kids in the way is sickening. Imagine someone ten times your size beating you while telling you that beating people is wrong. Like what the hell is wrong with people who can't analyze this for 2 seconds before they act on it.
member
Activity: 112
Merit: 10
January 05, 2013, 06:52:36 PM
#91
Is he a nigger? Then this is normal behavior.

You frighten me because I think you’re serious.

I noticed it too, but chose to ignore it. These forums (and Bitcoin itself) could do without such people...
legendary
Activity: 2156
Merit: 1393
You lead and I'll watch you walk away.
January 05, 2013, 06:44:54 PM
#90

Is he a nigger? Then this is normal behavior. If not then it is Tom and Jerry cartoons that are teaching the kid the way of life. Better bring back the belt now or you will need a baseball bat when he is 14 years old or pump-action shotgun when he turns 21. Most of junkies were misbehaving since very young age.



You frighten me because I think you’re serious.
legendary
Activity: 947
Merit: 1042
Hamster ate my bitcoin
January 05, 2013, 05:49:50 PM
#89
I'm generally not ok with physically punishing children... But in this case you're dealing with a kid who is using violence against someone else, and I think the punishment fits the crime. He's gotta learn that if you go around hitting people you're gonna get hit back...

Maybe the lesson he will learn, is that violence is an acceptable method of influencing peoples behaviour.
member
Activity: 112
Merit: 10
January 05, 2013, 05:46:53 PM
#88
I was spanked sparingly when I was young [...] I probably got spanked twice in a year, on average.

Damn, I remember gettin 'em twice per day when I was a lad lol... and we didn't get "spanked", we got beatTongue
member
Activity: 112
Merit: 10
January 05, 2013, 05:41:21 PM
#87
well at first its "oh boys will be boys", "hes just jealous" , and his mother does tell him off, put him in a time out, then make my say sorry.
but this form of discipline has yet to have any affect...

No one is fine with the situation, its starting to worry everyone,  and no one is quite sure how to handle it...

I'm generally not ok with physically punishing children... But in this case you're dealing with a kid who is using violence against someone else, and I think the punishment fits the crime. He's gotta learn that if you go around hitting people you're gonna get hit back... I guarantee he will stop when he figures out that he will feel pain each time he inflicts pain on someone else. It's one of those things where a severe punishment is warranted... if this behavior is not stopped NOW, while he's still young, it's only going to get worse and worse. Eventually he will either seriously hurt someone or someone will kill him.

However, I'd advise against using the belt because the kid chewed with his mouth open or doesn't want to go to bed... The belt should be reserved for only the most serious/severe circumstances where the child has done something awful and knows better. Also, never do it if you're angry. If it's used over and over not only does it lose its effect but you will just make the child spiteful and rebellious (trust me, I know that from first-hand experience lol).
legendary
Activity: 1512
Merit: 1049
Death to enemies!
January 05, 2013, 05:38:44 PM
#86
Quote
so, my son's uncle is 3.5 years old.
and every single time they play together, he hits my son on the head with a toy or something...
Is he a nigger? Then this is normal behavior. If not then it is Tom and Jerry cartoons that are teaching the kid the way of life. Better bring back the belt now or you will need a baseball bat when he is 14 years old or pump-action shotgun when he turns 21. Most of junkies were misbehaving since very young age.
hero member
Activity: 532
Merit: 500
FIAT LIBERTAS RVAT CAELVM
January 05, 2013, 05:35:48 PM
#85
http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/the-end-of-spanking/2013/01/02/d328cf1e-3273-11e2-bb9b-288a310849ee_story.html?wprss&google_editors_picks=true

Quote
George Holden envisions a world without spanking. No more paddling in the principal’s office. No more swats on little rear ends, not even — and here is where Holden knows he is staring up at a towering cliff of parental rights resistance — not even in the privacy of the home. When it comes to disciplining a child, Holden’s view is absolute: No hitting.

Well, at least it looks like they're getting the tactics right... A law saying "no spanking" is about as hypocritical as it gets.
legendary
Activity: 1918
Merit: 1570
Bitcoin: An Idea Worth Spending
January 05, 2013, 05:29:02 PM
#84
http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/the-end-of-spanking/2013/01/02/d328cf1e-3273-11e2-bb9b-288a310849ee_story.html?wprss&google_editors_picks=true

Quote
George Holden envisions a world without spanking. No more paddling in the principal’s office. No more swats on little rear ends, not even — and here is where Holden knows he is staring up at a towering cliff of parental rights resistance — not even in the privacy of the home. When it comes to disciplining a child, Holden’s view is absolute: No hitting.
legendary
Activity: 1540
Merit: 1000
January 01, 2013, 02:04:10 AM
#83
Some kids simply need to get slapped a few times, for example if a kid hits another kid they should be hit aswell.
...because hypocrisy is such a great teaching method.

+1

The only thing that parental and teacher hypocrisy ever taught me was how they were wrong and I should rebel against it even more, thankfully I tended to only experience teacher hypocrisy, I was lucky Cheesy
full member
Activity: 238
Merit: 100
December 31, 2012, 09:42:05 PM
#82
After reading this thread, I really believe in sparing the rod, and outright spoiling the kid.
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