Suchmoon r u forgetting the '/s'
Cause I don't expect you to be a party to such hallucinations...
I carried a huge red "/s" in my signature for years. Didn't help - people still got pissed at me as if my sarcastic remarks were serious. True story.
But I must admit, I'm a sucker for batshit crazy conspiracy theories. If this thread can turn into a 500-page monster with memes and sextants - that'd be awesome.
Reptilian Theory and Practice 101, Chapter One
IDENTIFYING THE REPTILIAN PERSON (RP)
Always carry a assortment of perhaps a dozen lizards everywhere you are permitted to do so. Of course, that would not be allowed on airlines because they are controlled and piloted by the Reptilian People. Where possible, though, this selection of lizards can be used to advantage. When suspecting an apparent human is actually one of the RP, simply duct tape the closest resembling lizard to an exposed section of the Imposter's skin so that a comparative analysis may be made.
In the natural world, hawks, snakes and dogs eat lizards, so the RP fear these sorts of creatures. The RP may be able to remain undetected if presented with just one of these, but it would take a very unusual RP to not revert to his(her, faer, eir, piers, vis, xyr, ver, or hir) natural form momentarily when suddenly presented with all three hostiles.
This is the reason to always carry all three with you: a hawk, a snake and your favorite dog, all on leashes of course. Then when the predators are unleashed towards the suspected RP, carefully observe the skin in the vicinity of the duct taped test lizard for signs of the tell-tale transformation.
CAUTION: Beginners may find that during and after the invoking of the transformation, the suspected RP's skin may resemble a lizard other than the one initially selected and duct taped. When one is unsure, go ahead and duct tape all twelve lizards to the suspect prior to the conclusatory tests.
ULTRA CAUTION: Always presume the suspect is a RP, until you have evidence to the contrary. Even then, be suspicious. Creatures that can take over the world must be presumed to have some level of cleverness, at least more than our politicians do.