Q2)when i generate a new address/privatekey on bitaddress.org, how do i know that it is not an already a used address ?
The chances of generating an already used address are incredibly small. There are 115,792,089,237,316,195,423,570,985,008,687,907,852,837,564,279,074,904,382,605,163,141,518,161,494,336 possible private keys combinations. The number of available addresses is lower, but you can clearly see that you have nothing to worry about.
Q3)if i use electrum to send some (fractions of) bitcoins to another address, how do i know that my privatekey will not be stolen and used by somebody else ? (i suppose that i have to trust the developers of electrum and the open source aspect ?)
Electrum is open-source and it has been reviewed by lots of people so far. You should be worried more about securing your setup so that your funds won't get stolen by some kind of malware.
Q4)so a safe approach would be to have several addresses with small amounts rather than only one address with a big amount ? what do you think ? (in case a privatekey is stolen)
As long as you keep those private keys separately then it is safe (don't forget to encrypt them too). However, it would make spending coins from those addresses difficult if you are going to do that.