Fuck me. It's hard to imagine a worse call. Well, the market has spoken and the market always gets the last word.
You can help me eat a shoe.
May I suggest pressure-cooking it?
If I'm not mistaken, the first advertised use for pressure cookers was cooking down bones. Leather would be trivial
Pft. Who can afford to eat leather these days?
During the Klondike gold rush people could afford to eat their shoes as Charlie Chaplin did in his gold rush movie, but people are poorer these days. Besides that half the shoes in today's stores are either plastic or "leather coated plastic", which means they glued a millimeter thick layer of leather over the plastic. Plastic's not edible unless it's a MacDonalds.
