If I were religious, I would pray for you... Fuck, but I am NOT. 
Have you considered Pastafarianism, The Church of the Subgenius or Discordianism?
You should. Especially Discordianism. The way you disagree with lots of people and your enthusiasm for it would make you a wonderful pope!
See, even chartbuddy has been proclaimed a Discordian pope already!
That discordianism did seem to be a pretty interesting religion... and I am having some internal discordance at the moment regarding whether I should disagree with any of your points.
Don't worry, Discordians are forbidden to agree with each other.
Of course, you are free to disagree with that rule.
Some relevant quotes:
Quote from: Principia Discordia
If you want in on the Discordian Society
then declare yourself what you wish
do what you like
and tell us about it
or if you prefer
don't.
There are no rules anywhere.
The Goddess Prevails.
then declare yourself what you wish
do what you like
and tell us about it
or if you prefer
don't.
There are no rules anywhere.
The Goddess Prevails.
Quote from: Principia Discordia
KNOW YE THIS O MAN OF FAITH!
I - There is no Goddess but Goddess and She is Your Goddess. There is no Erisian Movement but The Erisian Movement and it is The Erisian Movement. And every Golden Apple Corps is the beloved home of a Golden Worm.
II - A Discordian Shall Always use the Official Discordian Document Numbering System.
III - A Discordian is Required during his early Illumination to Go Off Alone & Partake Joyously of a Hot Dog on a Friday; this Devotive Ceremony to Remonstrate against the popular Paganisms of the Day: of Catholic Christendom (no meat on Friday), of Judaism (no meat of Pork), of Hindic Peoples (no meat of Beef), of Buddhists (no meat of animal), and of Discordians (no Hot Dog Buns).
IV - A Discordian shall Partake of No Hot Dog Buns, for Such was the Solace of Our Goddess when She was Confronted with The Original Snub.
V - A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing what he reads.
IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT. HAIL DISCORDIA! PROSECUTORS WILL BE TRANSGRESSICUTED.
I - There is no Goddess but Goddess and She is Your Goddess. There is no Erisian Movement but The Erisian Movement and it is The Erisian Movement. And every Golden Apple Corps is the beloved home of a Golden Worm.
II - A Discordian Shall Always use the Official Discordian Document Numbering System.
III - A Discordian is Required during his early Illumination to Go Off Alone & Partake Joyously of a Hot Dog on a Friday; this Devotive Ceremony to Remonstrate against the popular Paganisms of the Day: of Catholic Christendom (no meat on Friday), of Judaism (no meat of Pork), of Hindic Peoples (no meat of Beef), of Buddhists (no meat of animal), and of Discordians (no Hot Dog Buns).
IV - A Discordian shall Partake of No Hot Dog Buns, for Such was the Solace of Our Goddess when She was Confronted with The Original Snub.
V - A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing what he reads.
IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT. HAIL DISCORDIA! PROSECUTORS WILL BE TRANSGRESSICUTED.
Hope that doesn't make matters any clearer.
There may be some value in such discordian considerations, and I may share some of the ideology - however, you may gather from my prior commentaries on government and/or politics, that even though I have a tendency to be contrarian, I may be willing to accept and follow more community rules than a "true" (if there is such a thing) follower of Discordianism.
