It's not all gloomy though, as long as you have free will, you can still change (assuming of course that you don't fall prey to the proverbial ego along the way )
It's true that many of the internal and external policies being followed are based on power, on imposing "our" will on others, which as you say, divides as much (or even more) than it unites. But these aren't laws of nature, or the only way in which the world, and human society, knows how to work - again, this seems to me to be the path consciously chosen by those in power (in the several forms it manifests), which also happen to be those that typically profit the most from said policies. Of course, the population at large can be manipulated to support these efforts; but I don't believe it reflects most people's wants, or needs, or even a belief in force as being the only path available to enact change in the world. Now, that isn't to say society isn't to blame, to some extent, by accepting and going along with these policies, but that goes to my previous point: that is changing, and more quickly the more connected and aware we all are.
On a more general note, I found the following episode of Head to Head with Viviane Reding, the former vice president of the European Commission, to be quite interesting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=liLeHHFwDM8 ("Head to Head - Europe: Is the Union over?", 47m29s). It covers several issues, like the democratic deficit and austerity in Europe, though not to as great a depth as I would like. And, even if I disagree with a lot of what Viviane Reding said, I still admire her going through with it - especially knowing how hard hitting the questions in this program usually are.
Delegating responsibility (to the 'ones at the top') has always been the primary means of mitigating guilt. It does not come as a surprise that your argument strongly supports possibility number one. Unfortunately it is impossible for me to further elaborate on my comment without challenging your fundamental understanding of the world. Proceeding past this point on an intellectual level will only lead to a dead end, it is unavoidable. From here you have to come to your own conclusions. Good luck!