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Topic: Biting more than i can chew. How can i do better? (Read 744 times)

sr. member
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Consider what has happened in the past as the most valuable experience in your life. I think the majority of young people who have above average income will take the same attitude as you, they choose to enjoy it instead of saving to achieve financial freedom in the future. A lifestyle that is classified as extravagant or always wanting to have something that one likes or desires is caused by not having responsibilities in one's life such as paying for the children/wife's life and household needs.

Now that conditions are starting to change a little, just think of what you are experiencing now as an early warning to change your lifestyle for the better. Learn all the lessons from the events you have experienced, at certain times you need to experience events like this to find out who are the true friends who always support you in good times and bad and who only take advantage of your economic condition and then leave you when your condition is in a pinch.

Yes, as this will serve as a valuable lesson to anyone who thinks that there is nothing permanent in this world. Maybe you are earning a lot today, but someday, your current situation will be upside down. Know how to prioritize yourself and your future. Do an investment you can count on if there are any unexpected things to happen.

Nowadays, most of the young people have this kind of situation. Having fun and enjoying a lifestyle like it will be a permanent activity in their life. Thinking that the money they have spent will be earned again. And a situation where they don't even know how to say NO to someone who needs financial help.
sr. member
Activity: 1974
Merit: 453
When I was in bad conditions 5 years ago that time my so called relatives never said that we are also there family member they never gave us importance while in family functions. But when slowly we start becoming financially stable, we purchase our own house and my siblings get into job including me that time they start giving importance to us that's why I learn lesson that if you are poor then there will be no relations in material world with anyone else. So earn money, save it and invest it where you are able to get money from money and never keep hope with anyone except money. money only have power to gives you everything in life from respect in society to love. There will be uncountable so called true friends when your pocket  is full.
hero member
Activity: 2114
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Consider what has happened in the past as the most valuable experience in your life. I think the majority of young people who have above average income will take the same attitude as you, they choose to enjoy it instead of saving to achieve financial freedom in the future. A lifestyle that is classified as extravagant or always wanting to have something that one likes or desires is caused by not having responsibilities in one's life such as paying for the children/wife's life and household needs.

Now that conditions are starting to change a little, just think of what you are experiencing now as an early warning to change your lifestyle for the better. Learn all the lessons from the events you have experienced, at certain times you need to experience events like this to find out who are the true friends who always support you in good times and bad and who only take advantage of your economic condition and then leave you when your condition is in a pinch.
full member
Activity: 280
Merit: 110
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When we are young we often lack the foresight to be able to properly handle our finances. There's nothing that can be done to recover what you have lost due to irresponsibility but you can take the lessons learned to adequately manage your future income. It's happened to me before and for a long period I was unable to earn very much.

It can take a while to bounce back but what has worked for me was completely cutting off most expenses aside from the bare minimum needed to live. I like to keep detailed information of how much money I have saved up and if it starts to get too low then I will look for an area to cut spending from.

I think that if you have no responsibility of home then you have no concept of saving and making your financial system stable because you don't realize that how to earn money and how to spend it. BUT once you become a responsible person of a family then you will know about the Importance of saving as well as reduce spending on those materials which are not much important for life.

Regression occurs at any stage of life therefore we should teach our children earlier that they will have responsibility in future so if they learn well early they will do better otherwise they will have difficulties in carrying out a job as a responsible person. As you described about handling of family expenses same should be done by each individual because there is no possibility that a person will live always without any responsibility.
sr. member
Activity: 1638
Merit: 292
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I believe that you still have many good opportunities to develop yourself and achieve the goals you want. Perhaps your previous luck has run out, and your life has become unbalanced, causing you to pay the price for your current situation in your personal finances and social relationships. I always hope everyone will always be positive in life, and that the difficult things of the present should just be seen as a challenge to conquer. Moreover, in your case, you have certain skills that make it easy for you to start over from now on, it's just a matter of whether you accept to let go of everything that has passed and start a new journey. I myself am not very successful in life, but the value I seek is happiness, which I feel is created by myself and not dependent on anyone. Maybe our preconceived notions keep us stuck with material attachments when before you may have had plenty, but in reality, money should only be seen as a connecting tool.
sr. member
Activity: 1624
Merit: 336
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I am a young man who is not married. I have made some mistakes in how I use money and the resources I obtain. So, I have come to share this problem with everyone in the hope of finding help and changing the way I misuse money.

When we are young we often lack the foresight to be able to properly handle our finances. There's nothing that can be done to recover what you have lost due to irresponsibility but you can take the lessons learned to adequately manage your future income. It's happened to me before and for a long period I was unable to earn very much.

It can take a while to bounce back but what has worked for me was completely cutting off most expenses aside from the bare minimum needed to live. I like to keep detailed information of how much money I have saved up and if it starts to get too low then I will look for an area to cut spending from.
sr. member
Activity: 560
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Learning to cook for example is one of the easiest ways to save money.
I agree with you because I observed that the most thing we spend money on in our daily lives is food, food is the number one expensive item in our lives because we must feed ourselves, and most people who have not married consider cook as a waste of time but if you calculate the money they spend daily in buy food is very huge, but if they decided to use that money to cook it will last for two days. if there is no money we tend to manage ourselves but when money comes we spend it anyhow, if we can control our feeding that will have a positive impact on our savings.


There are friends who are allowed to be brought to the fence of the house. There are friends who are only allowed to enter the house. There are friends who can exchange things with each other.
Hopefully you understand what I mean.
Normally we do have friends but friends increase or decrease depending on the level of our income, as for me I always believe that true friends are those who are with you when you have nothing. in this life, we just have to be careful when choosing a friend matter our financial status, money is a guest that doesn't come alone but comes with so many things, like a change of character. when we are getting money will always look above us and that is the number one problem we face, we forget the friends we have from the past and make friends with rich people and forget about old friends.

But like I suggest to everyone else, it's time to start cutting down on expenses. Think about what is necessary for you, and the things that you only desire to have, postpone them until another date.
Some people think that using a scale of preference is made for poor people who have no money to cover their needs, but they got it wrong because if the rich decide not to use it they will end up losing their money, control of our spending is for both poor and rich people.
copper member
Activity: 2968
Merit: 574
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Sorry to hear about the tough times that you had. iT happens to everyone at least once in their lifetime. People do make mistakes when they forget about the "reality". But it's great that you're looking to change yourself and turn things around in your life. Its always a good thing to realize and accept your mistakes. You know about your financial situations much better than us. So it is you who should take those decisions but I can suggest you some "normal" stuffs. You should start budgetting. Set aside money for things you must need like rent, food, and savings. Anything left can be your 'fun money' that you can use to enjoy. Remember, savings first and then comes the fun money. Don't forget about the emergency funds too. They aren't the same as savings. About the impulse buying, always ask yourself if you really needed it and what you could do with that money instead of buying something that you wouldn't need.
full member
Activity: 308
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No one can tell when death and change will come. There is a proverb - don't be afraid of the clouds, remember that the sun is peeking out from behind the clouds.  Many world famous people have failed in their first attempt but the pain of failure does not deter anyone. Forget the past and focus on yourself first, don't care what others think about you. I've noticed that the forum has given a lot of great guidance. You can follow the instructions from there. Be diligent, develop the mindset to get up when you fall suddenly to keep the pace of life going. So prepare yourself humanly, set a goal in life and take slow and resolve to move forward. Success is staring at you.
    Financial struggles can affect ones state of mind and even cause them to make rash decisions on themselves. Everyone is trying their best to live through this storm of life, setbacks unendingly will arise in the process, they tend to make you feel disgusted and disappointed. Sometimes you may feel like you've exhausted all your options and steps to take but you just have to try harder. Be relentless, don't be ashamed of mistakes, mistakes would always be made but in the process of life, there's always room for corrections.
   Every new day, one wakes up to new challenges with a whole new different method to jumping through it. A timid and scared mind won't be able to face it, surviving is all about the depth of our toughness, its randomly said that there's no joy anywhere, everybody's eyes are red and anyone that loose guard or go off the track will have to face the consequences. Do well to have with you as many strategies to overcoming life as you can because they'll so much be handy in the shortest possible time.
member
Activity: 210
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The main reason I'm sharing this topic is to get your own opinions and advice so that I can do better. I believe it's because of poor financial management that I've fallen to this level. I've been doing things that I now realize were not the right things to do because I don't have any financial stability. Last week, I felt ashamed when people see how frustrated i am because I had bitten off more than I could chew. I'm open to opinions and helpful insights to start again, but this time in a more stable and responsible manner.
No one can tell when death and change will come. There is a proverb - don't be afraid of the clouds, remember that the sun is peeking out from behind the clouds.  Many world famous people have failed in their first attempt but the pain of failure does not deter anyone. Forget the past and focus on yourself first, don't care what others think about you. I've noticed that the forum has given a lot of great guidance. You can follow the instructions from there. Be diligent, develop the mindset to get up when you fall suddenly to keep the pace of life going. So prepare yourself humanly, set a goal in life and take slow and resolve to move forward. Success is staring at you.
full member
Activity: 350
Merit: 218
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OP, I understand from reading your story that you are currently in financial trouble. One's life does not always go well, sometimes one has to go through bad times. This is due to some wrong decisions, if you had saved some money for your future instead of spending a lot of money beforehand, you would not have been in such a financial crisis. Don't be disappointed, keep working patiently and soon everything will be back to normal. OP I noticed one more thing after reading your story, when you had money you had many friends by your side. But you are in danger and your friends are not there. However try to spend less than you earn. Don't spend all the money, keep saving some money for your future well-being. If you want you can invest some amount from your income in Bitcoin following DCA method, which will help you financially in future.
full member
Activity: 2002
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Anyways, it is beautiful that you want to improve your financial management and plan for a more stable and responsible future. One suggestion would be to consider developing a budget that aligns with your current income and expenses. To create a clear picture of your financial situation and allocate your resources more effectively, start by tracking your expenses and identifying areas where you can cut or make adjustments. Also, you should set some financial goals for yourself, it could be saving a certain percentage of your income each month, which can provide a sense of purpose and direction.
All of us must have management plans for our financial aspect and we must also have our way to gather for the future ,  like me ?

          - Gathering 100 dollar, I must only spend 50-60 dollars and the remaining will be for the future , either in banks or in crypto or even in Business.

          - Not giving my Family luxury things instead I am teaching them to learn how to value money , to only spend what has given to them.

          - Never take a Loan with Interest because this is a hard obligation that sometimes will bring us to making wrong management.


those are mine , and hope will help OP to have Idea what to do better.
full member
Activity: 742
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The main reason I'm sharing this topic is to get your own opinions and advice so that I can do better. I believe it's because of poor financial management that I've fallen to this level. I've been doing things that I now realize were not the right things to do because I don't have any financial stability. Last week, I felt ashamed when people see how frustrated i am because I had bitten off more than I could chew. I'm open to opinions and helpful insights to start again, but this time in a more stable and responsible manner.
You are going through a bad time and hopefully you will be able to bounce back with your work skills. But saving money is a difficult task that is not easy for everyone. Earning money is easier than saving money. You might not have had such a situation if you had regularly deposited the rest of your income except your expenses. We all know that if we spend more than we earn then the deficit that will be created will never be filled. At some stage we will find that we are in debt. We should save even a little of what we earn, and reduce our spending propensity, we should accumulate money. Because accidents can happen at any time. Also, you may not get money from the people you are helping in times of need. It is always best to rely on yourself and walk on your own strength.
hero member
Activity: 2968
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Yes, he can start from budgeting and see himself if he's going to improve with a week trial. There are a lot of free budgeting apps that he can find on playstore but of course download only the ones that has good reviews and gazillions of downloads and has a good star rating.
Do this consistently for a month and definitely he'd see the difference of a former him and into a new him that knows how to budget and check his finances once in a while. This is actually a good start.
Being aware is already an advantage and is a good thing to start with. Planning would be easier if one knows his boundaries and limitations rather than to just engage with things his financial capacity won’t be able to cover. It’ll depend on this factor. Next is knowing where to engage yourself with in order to increase your daily or monthly income.Start with the things you can offer to a company or other people to earn money from them. You’d only lose once you chose to give up and stop; remember that. Think of how you started and how you made it to your ‘peak’ and for sure you’d recover as well. Acceptance of what happened will also help than to be burried with regrets. Move forward people.
He's already aware on how to earn well and he's from there and that's why it won't be a mystery and problem for him anymore on where and how to start. The problem lies on him is how to manage his finances but it humbled him down when he's shooked because of his bad habits.

Most of the time, you don't need a budgeting app, however, if the OP thinks that it will assist him into this goal,
then by all means, he should try using one of this apps. There are so many free anyway these days.
But to start, he needs to itemize his basic expenses maybe for a day, then for a month (bills).
When he sees the list, that's when he can tell where he can cut off some of his expenses.
Then, if he wants to buy something, think twice at least. And ask himself why he is buying such item, it is want or a must?
It's a good start when he's completely zero knowledge about how to budget. I have seen people that uses some apps to help themselves deal with daily expenses and budgeting. Good for you if you don't need that but for some cases and people they have to use one to be guided.
sr. member
Activity: 266
Merit: 276
You've said that you've grown to believe that as long as you've means to make money, you don't have to worry about spending and given that it's instilled to you at such a young age I assume, you're going to have a hard time being able to change the way you see money and your spending because the habit and mindset is too innate that a change would be difficult, you can probably do it in two days and then you're going to relapse to your old habits,
Yes, I said that. And I came to understand that change is constant. As my belief towards money has entirely changed. I now understand that if a person's experience doesn't change someone's view or perspective on things, then the experiences of others will.

I suggest that you talk this out with a financial expert that can help you in your spending and a psychologist to help you or guide you into rewiring how you think when it comes to money and removing the old habits and mindset that you want to change or remove. Self-help books can be helpful too.
You have made a valid point. Yesterday, I was with a friend, and we had a lot of discussion during which I shared some personal things with him. He related very well, and he gave me some advice on how he was able to break free from his own financial difficulties. It was helpful, but I will consider seeking advice from a financial advisor. Not because I want to change my perspective on money because i have already doen that, but because I want to learn how to make good financial plans and make effective use of money in business and in other aspects of life.
sr. member
Activity: 1624
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That's why we literally need to think of our future since everything is not permanent like for your source of income. It's good that you are managing your finances now cause your learned from your mistake, your own experience would help you to grow and be matured enough to handle things like financially by limiting yourself from your own desire and focus on investing for your future. Just take your time, some people took so long to recover from their losses as they trying to recover and finding a good start. There's actually nothing wrong with fulfilling your wants and desires which motivates us in life, just limit your money and always have emergency fund as well investment money, you can do DCA method cause you won't need to start with super huge capital.
hero member
Activity: 1540
Merit: 744
First of all, I hope things get better for you soon. To start addressing what you can improve, the most important aspects are self-control and money management. From what you've mentioned, I'm getting the vibe that you're a person who wants to spend money; the more you have, the more you spend, which is the wrong mentality to have for a variety of reasons. Some of which are limited or no savings for emergencies, no investment capabilities, and no real net worth. Thus, you need to improve your self-control and avoid spending every penny you receive. Put some aside for the future.
Anyways, it is beautiful that you want to improve your financial management and plan for a more stable and responsible future. One suggestion would be to consider developing a budget that aligns with your current income and expenses. To create a clear picture of your financial situation and allocate your resources more effectively, start by tracking your expenses and identifying areas where you can cut or make adjustments. Also, you should set some financial goals for yourself, it could be saving a certain percentage of your income each month, which can provide a sense of purpose and direction.
This is some solid advice; however, I'll tell you to start simple: no budgeting whatsoever; cut unnecessary expenses; do you need luxurious clothes? Probably not. Going to clubs and wasting all your money there? I don't think so. Think deeply about what you truly desire. From how I see things, based on what you described, you're someone who wants to feel desired, appear to have a social life, and so on. However, I'm sensing that there's a deeper reason for your behavior. Try to limit these habits, and if I were you, I'd be more cautious around my friends, as they can be taking advantage of your generosity, something that is unfortunately quite common.
full member
Activity: 1008
Merit: 141
Let's say you are going through a fairly tough test, but remember that there is no test that humans cannot overcome.  Let the past pass, you have to be a new person in your life, don't let the mistakes you made when you still had a lot of money, you repeat again in the future, our time is really limited, be the best version of yourself.

If we have money people will say "that's my brother" and vice versa...that's normal and don't think too much about it. Do it with pleasure and there will be a reward in return for you later without you expecting it. This is the same as the current money market conditions which allow investors to make bets based on the results and past correction moments tend to find support at the resistance line.

Just enjoy it, my friend..
right, there are no friendships that last forever, people come and go, they only stay when they have interests, love your parents, never think about things in different ways.
legendary
Activity: 3164
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Everything is a learning and sure you'll be able to make a comeback. Earlier you hadn't practiced money management, this time make it a practice yourself. You can experience the difference and the same will give better understanding on what is essential and where you need to limit your spending. Based on the opening statement it is clear that OP had spent big money unwantedly. Now onwards he should focus on savings, and it'll be easy for him. Because, even in the past he had spent much for his friends and now he doesn't have much of friends. Automatically he can concentrate well on savings. It isn't too late realising the surrounding, but it is an opportunity to correct yourself.
full member
Activity: 364
Merit: 220
Eloncoin.org - Mars, here we come!
The OP's experience is not uncommon with youthful exuberance, where you spend all the money that you have because you feel that the money source will replenish itself tomorrow. Not knowing that the only thing constant is change, and that source can cease. I'm glad that you are able to see the recklessness in that kind of habit and you're ready to make amends and to start on a new level. You'd be surprised that some homeless people and bergers were once financially stable, but due to wrong choices and lack of financial education, has kept them in their destitute conditions.

My advice is that it's very important to have financial education, to guide your expenditures, because without it, you might fall back on reckless spendings. I'll summarize the basic principles of financial education that works for me, maybe you can learn something from it.

1, make a list and prioritize the things that you need not things that you want  for the week or month, this will help you to be focused on spending on things that are important to you.
2, have a budget for this needs and try not to exceed the budget.
3, discipline, this is the core of it, if you don't discipline your self to follow number one and two, then you might find yourself coming back to financial recklessness.

It's ok to add enjoying yourself in the priority list, but it shouldn't be further down the list, also remember to have the discipline not to exceed the percentage of money that you have budgeted for the enjoyment.

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