How do we raise our kids in this kinda society - page 4.

tvbcof

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Quote from: laredo7mm on May 06, 2022, 05:41:58 AM

Quote from: tvbcof on May 05, 2022, 11:25:35 PM

Quote from: laredo7mm on May 05, 2022, 10:20:59 AM

If your surrounding is this bad then create a friendly environment inside your house for your kids. It is better to have no friends than to have some bad ones. Teach them about respect and patience till they grow up. Parents could become the ultimate teacher of a child.
...

I don't agree with that. The best bet is to have 'friends' which are a cross-section of society in my opinion. I've certainly learned some of the most valuable lessons in life from my 'bad' friends, and as a consequence am able to cope in a diversity of societies and social structures. Cloistering, in my observation, leads to viewing society through rose-colored glasses and/or viewing 'bad people' in mostly invalid ways due to lack of background experiences which make it impossible to comprehend necessary nuances.

But you are risking your kid's future here. They are kids not grown men. Kids easily get influenced by people surrounding them or at least try to be like them. The lessons you are talking about will come in the way of their life but spending too much time with some bad character could change their character too. You can not be with your kid all the time till they become a grown man.

That's why I wouldn't consider public schools at this point. If my kids learn how to make a quick-n-dirty pot pipe out of a soda can like I did, that's no big deal to me. If they learn all about butt-sex, genital mutilation, and dangerous drugs such as hormone blockers from some creepy tranny satanist, it is a big deal.

laredo7mm

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Quote from: tvbcof on May 05, 2022, 11:25:35 PM

Quote from: laredo7mm on May 05, 2022, 10:20:59 AM

If your surrounding is this bad then create a friendly environment inside your house for your kids. It is better to have no friends than to have some bad ones. Teach them about respect and patience till they grow up. Parents could become the ultimate teacher of a child.
...

I don't agree with that. The best bet is to have 'friends' which are a cross-section of society in my opinion. I've certainly learned some of the most valuable lessons in life from my 'bad' friends, and as a consequence am able to cope in a diversity of societies and social structures. Cloistering, in my observation, leads to viewing society through rose-colored glasses and/or viewing 'bad people' in mostly invalid ways due to lack of background experiences which make it impossible to comprehend necessary nuances.

But you are risking your kid's future here. They are kids not grown men. Kids easily get influenced by people surrounding them or at least try to be like them. The lessons you are talking about will come in the way of their life but spending too much time with some bad character could change their character too. You can not be with your kid all the time till they become a grown man.

Zlantann

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In my country examination malpractice is now the order of the day. Students no longer study for exams because there are special malpractice sites that one can pay to access the examination questions and answers. Sometimes I wonder who would teach my own children. Our society now suffers from youth and even children abuse of hard drugs. While I was growing up, the most common drug was Indian hemp. Now children go to pharmacy or drug dispensaries to get different kind of medical drugs which they combine to get high. The most scary part of this is that the society is gradually accepting these vices a norms.

For me I would keep advising, correcting and guiding my children. And I must also be a good example. Children learn more from observation than instructions. Hence parents should ensure that they do what the preach. Act the way you want them to act.

tvbcof

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Quote from: laredo7mm on May 05, 2022, 10:20:59 AM

If your surrounding is this bad then create a friendly environment inside your house for your kids. It is better to have no friends than to have some bad ones. Teach them about respect and patience till they grow up. Parents could become the ultimate teacher of a child.
...

I don't agree with that. The best bet is to have 'friends' which are a cross-section of society in my opinion. I've certainly learned some of the most valuable lessons in life from my 'bad' friends, and as a consequence am able to cope in a diversity of societies and social structures. Cloistering, in my observation, leads to viewing society through rose-colored glasses and/or viewing 'bad people' in mostly invalid ways due to lack of background experiences which make it impossible to comprehend necessary nuances.

I do agree agree with trying to be 'the ultimate teacher', but also try to get right up to the line then _try_ to save their asses before they fall into the abyss.

The interesting thing to me is that some of the 'best people' I know had truly frightful formative years. Conversely, some of the biggest shit-heads had it all growing up. A lot in fact. Most people accept that there is a balance of 'nature vs. nurture'. I tend to think that 'nature' is more predominant that 'nurture' compared to a lot of others.

laredo7mm

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Quote from: Nickbryan10 on May 03, 2021, 06:00:36 AM

Society nowadays doesn't seem like anything we grew up in, it's so complex and diverse that I can't help but wonder if this is where my kids are going to grow up and how do I manage.
While growing up fraudulent activities, prostitution, and others were seen as heinous crimes whereas today it is seen as a norm. How do I send my children out to society even with a thorough upbringing and not be afraid not knowing what society will through at them? It frightens me. Can't help but wonder.

If your surrounding is this bad then create a friendly environment inside your house for your kids. It is better to have no friends than to have some bad ones. Teach them about respect and patience till they grow up. Parents could become the ultimate teacher of a child.

Our society came down this far because of so-called human rights where you can do anything and no one could talk about it. human rights don't mean you could do prostitution openly or give hate speech.

Gyfts

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First of all, limit any social media activity. The depression and suicide rates of children growing up in developed worlds are partly blamed on social media. I'm sure there'll be psychology studies that demonstrate the long term negative effects of social media within the next decades as the current generation of children grow up with universal internet access, but take my word for it that there is no net benefit of children using social media unfettered. If you want children to be thick skinned, try not sending them to an indoctrination camp (aka most modern liberal arts institutions of higher learning).

darklus123

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It is indeed difficult, But there is still a way and it may need your sacrifice, especially with your career. I've noticed that children being raised in the countryside or a province area tend to be more polite and have better manners rather than those who lived in the city where they are easily exposed to bad experiences.

Also, constant guidance is needed. Even if they haven't experienced it you should explain it to them before they learn it from other people. Lastly, it is important to give them support but never limit them to exploring things. Them, knowing that they always have your back is a good thing.

Sacrod

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Before we consider how to raise our kids in this present society, what about we address the kinds of parent we presently have? You cannot give what you do not have, its not possible to train kids if you are not well equipped about the morals and ethics of life, you need to lead by example, let them see and learn positive things from you. What kids are exposed to in this 21st century makes it a bit difficult to have kids with morals. Parents needs to be well informed, you can't train them the way you were trained some decades back, one needs to be updated so that you can know how to catch up with the new trends.
Children are liable to making mistakes but correcting them at the early stage of their lives saves the parent or guardian a whole lot of stress. Kids have their choices to make and we can't coerce them in doing what we want, but we need to let them know what is right and wrong, and not just that, let them know the consequences of their action and leave them to make their decisions. Parenting is not a easy thing and it takes God's grace, prayers, discipline and lots more to successfully raise good kids in this present society.

verita1

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It is true that today's society is very different from what we expect for the future of our children.
I think that we should start from our home if we give the best family education where good principles, morals and love of neighbor I believe that we will give the foundations to our children.
The good example comes from home, then continues education to forge their futures in school and University.
At this stage it is the most worrying because they have to interact with other children and young people and that is where they change.
If children have a good example from their parents they will have a large percentage of being prepared to achieve a good future.

Masplanc

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I think best way to raise kid. It's to be real to them, tell them about life experience. Use life and experience of family members and friends to teach them. Teach them with example of things that is happening around our environment

Lordhermes

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The society has corrupted to the extent that raising up a kid in it becomes a big problem.We are now in a society where Kids are raped Everytime and every where.We are in a society where killing and murdering has become the order of the day.
We are in a society where children,adults are used for rituals.and with all these catch-22,we struggle to train our children in a good way,when the society is there to influence them negatively.
Keeping our children from peers that will influence them badly is ideal.

ifarted

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The society we lived in changes a lot since this is the new generation that we lived in. What you need to do is guide you're children. Instead of blindfolding their eyes to reality, let them live and experience reality. You cannot change the world but you can teach you're children good morals and values while experiencing reality.

As long as you're there for you're children everything will be alright. You can help them understand Why the world is like this. When the child made mistakes correct him/her so that they would learn and when they learn they grow up.

Maestro75

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Quote from: Nickbryan10 on May 03, 2021, 06:00:36 AM

Society nowadays doesn't seem like anything we grew up in, it's so complex and diverse that I can't help but wonder if this is where my kids are going to grow up and how do I manage.
While growing up fraudulent activities, prostitution, and others were seen as heinous crimes whereas today it is seen as a norm. How do I send my children out to society even with a thorough upbringing and not be afraid not knowing what society will through at them? It frightens me. Can't help but wonder.

When you grew up was around what year? Was it in 18th century? Because even in the 17th century and before it there were crimes too. Crimes and vices have been there since the creation of man. The way you are complaining of the increased rates of crime in the world today will be the same way those youngsters of today will complain of crimes years later when they would have become parents. Every generation has its own size of crimes and criminals.

Natsuu

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Quote from: Slow death on July 23, 2021, 03:13:22 PM

the situation gets worse because in schools and even our neighbors educate their children in a different way and when the child leaves home where they have a more rigid education and finds a friend who has a more moderate education, this child who has a more rigid education starts to look for the father as if the father were an evil person who is repressing him and starts to imitate his friends who have a moderate education and in many cases he imitates the lack of education of neighbors and friends

And that's where you as a parent come in!

You just not specifically teach your children's to follow your teachings as world progress and individuals progress different from one another. You must teach them that everyone is different from one another, and being different is not something you must be afraid of. You must be the one to teach how the world works and what they need to be prepared in the world we are already living in.

Yes influences are everywhere, in school, outside the house, EVERYWHERE, but you must teach the basics of basics and let them see the things that needed experience to be known. And then you clarify what makes it weird or abnormal afterwards.

Slow death

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the situation gets worse because in schools and even our neighbors educate their children in a different way and when the child leaves home where they have a more rigid education and finds a friend who has a more moderate education, this child who has a more rigid education starts to look for the father as if the father were an evil person who is repressing him and starts to imitate his friends who have a moderate education and in many cases he imitates the lack of education of neighbors and friends

sapnu

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Quote from: Nickbryan10 on May 03, 2021, 06:00:36 AM

Society nowadays doesn't seem like anything we grew up in, it's so complex and diverse that I can't help but wonder if this is where my kids are going to grow up and how do I manage.
While growing up fraudulent activities, prostitution, and others were seen as heinous crimes whereas today it is seen as a norm. How do I send my children out to society even with a thorough upbringing and not be afraid not knowing what society will through at them? It frightens me. Can't help but wonder.

The world has changed a lot and it is mostly detrimental for the next generation. If we're going to look back at our childhood, we can see how different the world is right now. Maybe we can blame it to the innovations made by technology as well as the way of thinking of the older ones and even the ways of the government at the present. Most children nowadays thirst to be heard and also aggressive to exercise their rights. The society is too judgemental and at the same time longs to normalize a lot of unusual stuffs which keeps on shaping the world into an uglier mold, at some point we find the new generation hopeless due to all of the happenings in the world.

tvbcof

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Quote from: Mauser on July 22, 2021, 05:30:04 AM

Quote from: Xinarae* on July 22, 2021, 12:20:15 AM

Early childhood is the time when child care and growth needs to be taken care of the most. Children need to be taught discipline aesthetics tidying up not wasting what to do and what not to do everything he sees hears and understands is reflected in the next life selfishness or generosity these bad experiences have a strong effect on the growth of the brain at this time neglect or abuse complicates the child's intellectual behavior and emotions to gain knowledge and try to overcome bad experiences.

Discipline is a very important virtue that we all should try to teach our kids when they are young. Many employers are looking for hard working employees, so if we can prepare our kids when they are young it will benefit in the long run. Same goes for school, with discipline they can study better and get a better degree. Another important factor is independence in my opinion. We should try and make out kids think on their own.

Kids who were sexually molested by their parents have a tenancy to grow up to do the same.

Kids who saw their father beat their mother and their siblings have a tenancy to grow up to do the same.

Kids who saw their parents be dutiful servants and good workers for the power structure have a tenancy to grow up to do the same. <--- **you are here**

Mauser

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Quote from: Xinarae* on July 22, 2021, 12:20:15 AM

Early childhood is the time when child care and growth needs to be taken care of the most. Children need to be taught discipline aesthetics tidying up not wasting what to do and what not to do everything he sees hears and understands is reflected in the next life selfishness or generosity these bad experiences have a strong effect on the growth of the brain at this time neglect or abuse complicates the child's intellectual behavior and emotions to gain knowledge and try to overcome bad experiences.

Discipline is a very important virtue that we all should try to teach our kids when they are young. Many employers are looking for hard working employees, so if we can prepare our kids when they are young it will benefit in the long run. Same goes for school, with discipline they can study better and get a better degree. Another important factor is independence in my opinion. We should try and make out kids think on their own.

Xinarae*

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Early childhood is the time when child care and growth needs to be taken care of the most. Children need to be taught discipline aesthetics tidying up not wasting what to do and what not to do everything he sees hears and understands is reflected in the next life selfishness or generosity these bad experiences have a strong effect on the growth of the brain at this time neglect or abuse complicates the child's intellectual behavior and emotions to gain knowledge and try to overcome bad experiences.

songchunlai

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Let him make a plan, then keep it. A big target, then he will find the way.

Topic: How do we raise our kids in this kinda society - page 4. (Read 1096 times)