It's gambling after all, there's no logic to it.
the heart started beat faster and make a bigger amount to deposit to recover the last amount that lost. always happened to me , sometimes it is annoying but sometimes when you can not stop playing there is benefit you can covered the losing amount.
It is unlikely that you are going to win whenever you use huge bankroll for deposit. The risk will only be much higher than what it used to be when your bankroll is much bigger as well besides that it is really silly to try to get back what you have lost, it is gambling and losing in gamble is a normal thing