If some blocks are included in the main chain's block headers and some other represent "exclusively" sidechain's block headers that are not included in the main chain, then attacking the sidechain (by reversing sidechain "exclusive" blocks) is definitely easier to accomplish.
Why? You have one Bitcoin block with 7 BTC reward, and you have 700 sidechain blocks, 0.01 BTC each, and doing 51% attack to revert this 7 BTC should be as hard on that sidechain, as it is on Bitcoin. So, it is about tracking the difficulty, and about the same security for a given amount. You can measure that simply by relying on difficulty and amount: a combination of those two things should give you an answer about the security budget, and about the amount of work you need, if you want to reorg that.
On NameCoin, it is completely separated, where it should be joined: Merge-Mined chains should track the chain of the heaviest Proof of Work, and their block rewards should reflect that. So, NameCoin is an example of Merged Mining done wrong, because you can have a few percent of Bitcoin's hashrate, and they don't track all Bitcoin headers, but only those that are properly constructed, so you can attack them, even if you don't have enough power to attack Bitcoin. And that should be changed, to prevent that attack.
The same mistake was made by chains like BCH: if they have 1% of the BTC hashrate, then they should receive 1% of the coinbase amount, if that's what they need to maintain 10 minutes block time. Another mistake is that they splitted monetary base completely, instead of making transactions, that would be also valid on BTC, but would be just confirmed later, because of the block size limit.
"Wasted" hashes aren't passed to centralized pools for no reason.
I mean there is no reason to do that in a centralized way. There were some alternative ways, like P2Pool, and things should go further in that way, maybe also into LN rewards, sidechain rewards, and things like that.
But, how will Lightning or a sidechain contribute to it? You still pass your shares to a third party which pays you via Lightning; isn't this the general idea?
The difference is that it should be cryptographically secured. I thought about things like "pay to block hash address", when you could lock some coins on some address, and they could be taken, only by performing block validation. And I thought about compressing repeated parts, so something like that:
/---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------\
| normal address -> pay to block hash -> pay to merkle tree -> pay to merkle proof -> ... -> pay to transaction -> pay to output |
| (80-byte header) (64-byte merkle proof) (64-byte merkle proof) (transaction data) |
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------/
But that's too heavy, so it should be simplified to some proofs that are more compressed, and take less space on-chain. Also, because transactions in mempools are similar, it is possible to validate repeated parts once, and then only track changes in some deterministic way. The main problem is about data compression, because technically it is possible to perform such "delayed validation" (and burn coins if someone will pass a fake block header hash or something). So, I can see two options:
1) validating basic things, and assigning coins to miners (or burning if they lied and are unable to provide a proof)
2) validating everything, and assigning coins to miners (if there are enough resources to validate everything on time)
but since everything depends on the main chain, these are irrelevant to sustainability
If you count all traffic on the main chain, all traffic inside LN, all traffic inside sidechains, and all Bitcoin-related traffic in general, and it is still not enough, then there are two options:
1) we live in a strange world, where there are no transactions at all, in any other monetary systems, because 99% people died or something
2) there are transactions in other networks, so we should think, if Bitcoin still has all needed features, and why people don't want to use it