A Nigerian Father Rejects Son's Gambling Win - page 2.

TheGreatPython

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Quote from: mvdheuvel1983 on June 27, 2023, 12:56:12 AM

Here we can see that there are different perspective people hold about gambling. We can also tell that a strict up bringing doesn't mean that the kids won't go up to their own vices. There are strong environmental and other cultural factors that affect the behavioral lifestlye and pattern of children.

My piece on this matter is that the boy won a lot of money and should not worry much about what his father's say. If the boy is wise he should prolly invest some of the money in his father's name. It could act as part of his father retirement fund that is if the father has one at all. I know the father won't reject it when the real need for the money arises to sort something out. Money is very power.

Whether his father will later accept the money earned through investments that were done using the gambling money or not will depend on why he rejected the money in the first place. If it was only for moral reasons and to teach his son that he shouldn't gamble and use the money from gambling as that will make him addicted to it, he might accept it later. But, if it had something to do with his religious beliefs, I don't think he would accept even the money earned through that sum.

People who have strong faiths and beliefs in their religion and take religious practices very seriously are very hard to be convinced to do something that their soul doesn't accept, they will outright reject things that doesn't match with their beliefs and is against their beliefs.

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Quote from: YOSHIE on June 27, 2023, 07:52:30 AM

My understanding is that the son should not have told him that the money was the result of gambling, there were many reasons for him to tell the money from other results, of course those who know the character and disposition of their own child's parents, surely he has reasons to refuse the money.

With a very big amount of money for their size and it can change their family's life for the better it will be difficult to hide the fact where the money came from, maybe he can use a fake story but of course it has to make sense because a fake story that is hard to make sense of will the harder it was for his father to accept the money, it could be that his father was a person of high moral standards who would not accept money not only from gambling but also money of unknown origin, so there is no need to force his father to accept the money
The father has the right to refuse the money but has no right to refuse his son using the money for his son's personal life, so the father must let his son use the money and it's up to him what it is used for, and the consequences will be borne by his son, especially since he can be said to be an adult.

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Quote from: Outhue on June 27, 2023, 02:22:23 AM

The son won a large amount of money and he decide to gave a part to the father, you know how fathers usually are, I mean the responsible ones, they will ask where the son get the money from.

I don't think the father took the money and donate to someone else, there is nothing in that story that sounds like this, I believe the father rejected the money and the son too, weird? Well it has happened around me too, someone living very close.

Before the son won this large amount, I believe the father must have been talking against gambling to the son, he must have severally warn him to stay away from gambling because his religion doesn't allow it, but the son thought that he could confuse his father with the money.

Well.. this adds more questions to the story. So the father asked the son to reject the prize? And seems like his son did what was told to him. So in the end who benefits from this? Only the online casino benefits out of all this, as they don't need to do the payout. I am not sure whether this is the right thing to do. The only individual who benefitted from this drama is the millionaire owner of the casino. The father could have just accepted the money and used it to give higher education to his son. Or better, he could have donated a part of it to his friends and relatives.

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Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

Even if his dad understands or not, he can at least make his life better with that money and we all know that is what a parent wants for their children, if he doesn't want him to become a gambling addict and stop gambling and that was his motive of rejecting the money, the son should show him that the money didn't ruin his life and he didn't gamble it away, he should start a business or something that would generate his revenue and then his father might be proud of him.

But, if it's a religious thing and the dad rejected the money because their religion forbids gambling, then I don't think that his dad will accept even the money he will earn through the business he started using the money he had won from gambling because religions won't allow that too.

YOSHIE

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Quote from: Mate2237 on May 23, 2023, 11:58:06 AM

How do you see the father? Was he right by rejecting the son gambling win?

In cases like this, we must first look at the religion the family adheres to and the family's position in society, that is one of the factors causing the son's father to refuse money from gambling proceeds, we often see that gambling often raises pros and cons in society, who knows more about the child's parents, whether they are one of the religious leaders in the area, of course he refuses to accept money from the proceeds of gambling.

My understanding is that the son should not have told him that the money was the result of gambling, there were many reasons for him to tell the money from other results, of course those who know the character and disposition of their own child's parents, surely he has reasons to refuse the money.

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Quote from: Outhue on June 27, 2023, 02:22:23 AM

Quote from: Sithara007 on June 26, 2023, 10:46:03 PM

Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

A lot of things are not clear in this story. What happened to the money? Did the father took that money and then donated it to a church or a charity organization? In that case we can't say that he rejected the winnings. We can only say that he accepted the money and then donated it to someone else. Only in case the father returned all the money to the casino, we can say that he rejected the prize. And I don't think that it happened either. And the casino hasn't made any announcement on this matter and legal situation is also a bit fluid (all forms of gambling are illegal in Nigeria).

The son won a large amount of money and he decide to gave a part to the father, you know how fathers usually are, I mean the responsible ones, they will ask where the son get the money from.

I don't think the father took the money and donate to someone else, there is nothing in that story that sounds like this, I believe the father rejected the money and the son too, weird? Well it has happened around me too, someone living very close.

Before the son won this large amount, I believe the father must have been talking against gambling to the son, he must have severally warn him to stay away from gambling because his religion doesn't allow it, but the son thought that he could confuse his father with the money.

This pretty much sums up what happened. The father rejected his son the moment the latter offered a portion of his winnings because perhaps it is against their religion to bet or play gambling of any sort. For some religious groups, gambling is really prohibited because they see it as a dirty money that came from a place of greed and being irresponsible. Hence, accepting money from any form of gambling is a no-no to them.

Additionally, some parents are just too conservative and too traditional. Some also very much stand up for their principles and beliefs. If we are to assume that the father is like this, then this just explains why he won't let his pride down to accept the money made from gambling. Giving it to charity won't be an option too because that just means he accepted it in some way, but just proceed to give it to other to remove the guilt of spending fund that came from a "dirty" way. I don't know if it's a good thing that the father stood his ground or not. But I guess to each his own. As long as he is not going to violate his son's right to the money he earned, then it's all good.

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Quote from: Outhue on June 27, 2023, 02:22:23 AM

Quote from: Sithara007 on June 26, 2023, 10:46:03 PM

Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

A lot of things are not clear in this story. What happened to the money? Did the father took that money and then donated it to a church or a charity organization? In that case we can't say that he rejected the winnings. We can only say that he accepted the money and then donated it to someone else. Only in case the father returned all the money to the casino, we can say that he rejected the prize. And I don't think that it happened either. And the casino hasn't made any announcement on this matter and legal situation is also a bit fluid (all forms of gambling are illegal in Nigeria).

The son won a large amount of money and he decide to gave a part to the father, you know how fathers usually are, I mean the responsible ones, they will ask where the son get the money from.

I don't think the father took the money and donate to someone else, there is nothing in that story that sounds like this, I believe the father rejected the money and the son too, weird? Well it has happened around me too, someone living very close.

Before the son won this large amount, I believe the father must have been talking against gambling to the son, he must have severally warn him to stay away from gambling because his religion doesn't allow it, but the son thought that he could confuse his father with the money.

The endpoint of the wager winnings is the heart of this yarn. Dad gifting it to a good cause, thought-provoking, eh? But is it in line with the story's nuances? In such a pickle, the father's ethos is the linchpin. Your comment suggests his religious-based gambling abhorrence. Its hard picturing him pocketing such gains, even for donation. Lets not forget the legalities. Your post reminds us that gambling is a no-go in Nigeria. So, if dad chooses charity, is he playing legal Russian roulette?

Alisha-k

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Quote from: Cantsay on May 23, 2023, 02:48:45 PM

I

Quote from: DaNNy001 on May 23, 2023, 12:52:41 PM

Quote from: Cantsay on May 23, 2023, 12:30:21 PM

[snipped]

Well it might not be illegal from your own view and perspective but like zlantann said some religious actually see this act as an ill act and its probably not welcome by them and if the father is a Muslim then I think his reason for rejecting the money justifies his claim but thats if the son is in a stage where he can't decide for himself because possessing such money can even make the son disown the father if its calls for it because money always come with a spirit that changes or amplifies someone character.

I can agree to religion being the reason why the father is against the money and as for the age i doubt it has anything to do with that.

I did a little search on the news and found at that the son is 19 years old which in most case is old enough to make his decision, and I also fount out that the day is not as rich as others as suspected him to be, and according to the image below the family is currently behind two months house rent payment.

[ source ]

If I'm in such situations, I'd rather disown my dad nor return the money, with the aid of my siblings and mum, I could play that I've returned the money while I hid it somewhere and watch him do his things, soon the young child will be an adult and would need to start a life, then I'll build my world with my money and my dad will have no choice but to accept me and my new world.

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Quote from: Sithara007 on June 26, 2023, 10:46:03 PM

Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

A lot of things are not clear in this story. What happened to the money? Did the father took that money and then donated it to a church or a charity organization? In that case we can't say that he rejected the winnings. We can only say that he accepted the money and then donated it to someone else. Only in case the father returned all the money to the casino, we can say that he rejected the prize. And I don't think that it happened either. And the casino hasn't made any announcement on this matter and legal situation is also a bit fluid (all forms of gambling are illegal in Nigeria).

The son won a large amount of money and he decide to gave a part to the father, you know how fathers usually are, I mean the responsible ones, they will ask where the son get the money from.

I don't think the father took the money and donate to someone else, there is nothing in that story that sounds like this, I believe the father rejected the money and the son too, weird? Well it has happened around me too, someone living very close.

Before the son won this large amount, I believe the father must have been talking against gambling to the son, he must have severally warn him to stay away from gambling because his religion doesn't allow it, but the son thought that he could confuse his father with the money.

mvdheuvel1983

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Here we can see that there are different perspective people hold about gambling. We can also tell that a strict up bringing doesn't mean that the kids won't go up to their own vices. There are strong environmental and other cultural factors that affect the behavioral lifestlye and pattern of children.

My piece on this matter is that the boy won a lot of money and should not worry much about what his father's say. If the boy is wise he should prolly invest some of the money in his father's name. It could act as part of his father retirement fund that is if the father has one at all. I know the father won't reject it when the real need for the money arises to sort something out. Money is very power.

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Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

A lot of things are not clear in this story. What happened to the money? Did the father took that money and then donated it to a church or a charity organization? In that case we can't say that he rejected the winnings. We can only say that he accepted the money and then donated it to someone else. Only in case the father returned all the money to the casino, we can say that he rejected the prize. And I don't think that it happened either. And the casino hasn't made any announcement on this matter and legal situation is also a bit fluid (all forms of gambling are illegal in Nigeria).

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Quote from: Hispo on June 25, 2023, 11:17:56 AM

Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

That is the issue, depending on the personality and the reasons why his dad rejected the money it could be translated to a probably irreversible damage in their family relationship and that is something which goes beyond whatever the son decided to do with the money.

Family is important after all, and the fact he offered some of the money to his father, means they have a very close relationship, it would be a very bad thing if that came to an end for money. Hopefully, this dad is one of those who understands with time and can be flexible enough.

As the son shared his gambling earnings with his father, three elements stood out. The son's choice to gamble, and then share the spoils, manifests his individual freedom, imbued with ethical layers. It mirrors his values concerning wealth's use and spread.

The father's denial, perhaps grounded in anti-gambling beliefs, enriches the situation. It exposes his moral standpoint, his 'right' and 'wrong' understanding. However, this rebuff risks tension, particularly if seen as rejecting the son's decisions.

Hispo

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Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

That is the issue, depending on the personality and the reasons why his dad rejected the money it could be translated to a probably irreversible damage in their family relationship and that is something which goes beyond whatever the son decided to do with the money.

Family is important after all, and the fact he offered some of the money to his father, means they have a very close relationship, it would be a very bad thing if that came to an end for money. Hopefully, this dad is one of those who understands with time and can be flexible enough.

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Quote from: molsewid on June 24, 2023, 02:22:35 PM

Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

I agree that is what his father wants then let it be, he already done with his part and there's nothing wrong with it he just want to help his family. Most of the time people stereotypes all gamblers, they were saying that it is bad and it is a sin, wherein it could be also use in a good way. Stigma is still in our era, but let them at least we know we as gamblers are not all addict just having fun.

but here we have to understand that a father wants the best for his child and the behavior of a father to his child is a valuable lesson for his child in the long term. even though a child wants to help his family there are still many ways to be able to help in other ways not from gambling.

IMO (a bit off topic) for me something that I got today, this is something that was destined for me to even earn a large amount of money from gambling and never consider if this money is a sin.

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Quote from: Sterbens on June 23, 2023, 11:34:35 PM

Quote from: tusandii on June 23, 2023, 09:22:50 PM

The strange part is that a father refuses his child's gambling winning money when they actually also need the money but there is no clear certainty why a father refuses money that they can use for survival and change their economy.

In my opinion, this is a good choice from his father, he does not want to receive winning money from his son's gambling results. After knowing this, I had the assumption that the actions taken by his father indirectly only wanted to let his son know that gambling was not good and would have a very bad impact on his personality and future. Even though on the other hand the family's financial situation is not good, in the sense that it needs money, and the father prefers not to use the money because he wants the best for his child. I think this is the reason for the actions taken by his father.

I also know that the intention of the father is very good for the future of his son so that he does not repeat gambling activities but actually with that money they can build a business or business so they can have a steady income and also a job.
That way the child can later have a business personality and forget about gambling.
Sometimes using forbidden things for the good and progress of life is the right thing.

But back again that everyone's thinking must be different even though their goals are the same.

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Quote from: adzino on June 24, 2023, 11:44:48 AM

Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

I agree that is what his father wants then let it be, he already done with his part and there's nothing wrong with it he just want to help his family. Most of the time people stereotypes all gamblers, they were saying that it is bad and it is a sin, wherein it could be also use in a good way. Stigma is still in our era, but let them at least we know we as gamblers are not all addict just having fun.

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Well, its the son's money and he can do anything he like with it. He offered it to his dad, and his dad rejected it. That's it. There is nothing more he can do about it. Maybe his dad is extremely religious or perhaps, gambling is seen very negatively where he lives, hence his dad doesn't want to be seen as a "bad" person or something. The kid can do good with the money. Perhaps start something for his own, spread and donate every now and then. But he shouldn't regret anything. As long as he isn't gambling and affecting his life or anyone, it should be fine. His dad will probably eventually understand.

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Quote from: Sterbens on June 23, 2023, 11:34:35 PM

Quote from: tusandii on June 23, 2023, 09:22:50 PM

The strange part is that a father refuses his child's gambling winning money when they actually also need the money but there is no clear certainty why a father refuses money that they can use for survival and change their economy.

In my opinion, this is a good choice from his father, he does not want to receive winning money from his son's gambling results. After knowing this, I had the assumption that the actions taken by his father indirectly only wanted to let his son know that gambling was not good and would have a very bad impact on his personality and future. Even though on the other hand the family's financial situation is not good, in the sense that it needs money, and the father prefers not to use the money because he wants the best for his child. I think this is the reason for the actions taken by his father.

There must have been some reason for his father not wanting to accept the money, even though his family needed the money to survive. And it seems his father adhered to his religion so much that when he found out the money came from gambling, he didn't want to accept it. His son should be able to understand his father's wishes and not give it to his father. Maybe his son could give his money to someone else and give up the big money for someone else. This was a dilemma for his son because he had won a lot of money but was rejected by his father. It was a plausible excuse that his father did.

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Quote from: Sithara007 on June 22, 2023, 01:33:19 AM

Quote from: elevates on June 19, 2023, 06:50:06 PM

Yes, that can be a possibility, the father's main concern would have been his son getting back again into gambling with the same money that he had won. His refusal in not with the money but how his son got the money. He is now certain that after this win his son might get more deep with this habit. We all know it is a hard habit to stop. After this big win the boy will again try his luck. In most cases they end up with nothing they won.

Well... in that case, it is not a valid argument. The father can take 90% of the money and keep it in a 10-year fixed deposit in any of the local banks. He can give the remaining 10% to his son, to do whatever he likes. But the concern is not without a reason. I personally know a few people who went bankrupt in a few months after winning the lottery jackpots. And then we have the example of Jack Whittaker, the American lottery winner who ended up with his family broken and living in penury a few years after winning the Powerball jackpot of $314.9 million.

Parents will always be right in this kind of situations because they best understand well how thier children can best behaved or perform in some apsect in life, sone parents don't even give a take on gambling and can't allow their children engage in such when they believe there are many other vocational learning skills they can learn and know while they are still expected to focus on their schools than running after gambling.

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Quote from: tusandii on June 23, 2023, 09:22:50 PM

The strange part is that a father refuses his child's gambling winning money when they actually also need the money but there is no clear certainty why a father refuses money that they can use for survival and change their economy.

In my opinion, this is a good choice from his father, he does not want to receive winning money from his son's gambling results. After knowing this, I had the assumption that the actions taken by his father indirectly only wanted to let his son know that gambling was not good and would have a very bad impact on his personality and future. Even though on the other hand the family's financial situation is not good, in the sense that it needs money, and the father prefers not to use the money because he wants the best for his child. I think this is the reason for the actions taken by his father.

Topic: A Nigerian Father Rejects Son's Gambling Win - page 2. (Read 1777 times)