Topic: Choosing between your relationship and gambling. - page 2. (Read 329 times)

the final decision will be on his fiancee because for sure she already knows that being a gambler is hard to get away from. it would take time for her to see if he is indeed stopping his gambling activities. they both need to sit down in this situation as they are planning for their future life together. it will be the cause of their marital problems later on if they haven't come up with an agreement with this aspect.

Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge. And this experience scares her to death having anything to do with anyone she notice that engages in gambles activities especially for someone she's in a serious relationship with, that she can't deal with such reality.

^That is right, they need to talk about this.
If his cousin was a long-time gambler so it means he passed massive heavy experienced which he has control of his gambling.
But the wrong move is, why he did not let know his fiance about his gambling activity and tell her about that he has control over it and nothing to worry. Girls have always that kind of attitude, trying to control someone especially if they know the outcome, but if you are an experienced gambler, you can tell her that you are not addicted and tell her that gambling is one of your habits. If you can explain it very well, then, there is no problem.

^That is right, they need to talk about this.
If his cousin was a long-time gambler so it means he passed massive heavy experienced which he has control of his gambling.
But the wrong move is, why he did not let know his fiance about his gambling activity and tell her about that he has control over it and nothing to worry. Girls have always that kind of attitude, trying to control someone especially if they know the outcome, but if you are an experienced gambler, you can tell her that you are not addicted and tell her that gambling is one of your habits. If you can explain it very well, then, there is no problem.

The trauma from her past experience with his Brother is there, and she knows that risk of getting involve in gambling so probably she just wanna make sure to live happy and without having any stress from a gambling problem. Your cousin have to choose, if gambling is very important to him then better to tell this one to his fiancee and make her understand that he’s not addict in gambling and he’s still in control, if she accepts it better but if not your cousin have to decide.

I don't blame your cousin's fiancee,he should have let her know he is a gambler,instead of allowing her to see it herself. Some ladies have made up their minds not to marry some particular kind of men,maybe because of their past experience with someone that has such habit or they don't just want to get involved with such person. If your cousin's fiancee is one of those type of ladies sorry she might not understand him.

If your cousin talk to her and she doesn't seem to understand with him,he should choose her or gambling, that is his choice and he loves her,then he needs to quit gambling but if prefer his gambling habit than her,he can let her go.

There's currently a heated issue between an older cousin of mine and his fiancee, it's a gambling related issue that's now looking like a threat to their relationship. Here's what happened;

My cousin as I know has been an active gambler for as long as I could remember and he's one person that gamble responsibly as he takes it as something that's part of a side hustling and nothing more and he added that the winning streaks he has been getting has really been supportive to him financially too. I get to know this cause that's what he told me when I asked him why does he have to engage in online gambling when he has a good paying job. The disturbing issue here is that a day ago his fiancee whom both have been dating for about a year now, she for the first time had access into his mail and discovered lots of email messages both previous and current from the particular gambling sites he has a gambling account with and her awareness of this has made her to ask my cousin to either chose between quiting from engaging in any form of gambling or ending their relationship.
Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge. And this experience scares her to death having anything to do with anyone she notice that engages in gambles activities especially for someone she's in a serious relationship with, that she can't deal with such reality.

I'll really appreciate to have you share some advise on what decision to take if you were to find yourself in this my cousin shoe. For It's been a difficult moment for him this past two days as he has  been thinking of the financial support he at times get from the gambling wins and at same time his fiancee too.

The trauma from her past experience with his Brother is there, and she knows that risk of getting involve in gambling so probably she just wanna make sure to live happy and without having any stress from a gambling problem. Your cousin have to choose, if gambling is very important to him then better to tell this one to his fiancee and make her understand that he’s not addict in gambling and he’s still in control, if she accepts it better but if not your cousin have to decide.

Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge. And this experience scares her to death having anything to do with anyone she notice that engages in gambles activities especially for someone she's in a serious relationship with, that she can't deal with such reality.

Why does she care so much? A year sounds like a very quick engagement too but what does she want him to do with the money instead?

If he had no other use for the money, gambling with it might not be too bad a thing if he's got a good paying job anyway. Taking himself away from gambling too would be much healthier than having someone else make him do it.

It sounds like she's in it mostly for the money (that could just be how you've worded it but it does sounds like she's a problem).

Tell your cousin to stay away from that girl.  
They are not married yet but she acts like she lost everything. If she had not discovered those emails, she wouldn't be overreacting though.

However, she already wants your cousin to choose which. It gets worse if she could successfully makes your cousin choose her. This is capitalizing on your cousin's feeling over her. It's not gonna be surprising one day you might not be able to hang out with your cousin anymore because she says so.

The trauma from her past experience with his Brother is there, and she knows that risk of getting involve in gambling so probably she just wanna make sure to live happy and without having any stress from a gambling problem. Your cousin have to choose, if gambling is very important to him then better to tell this one to his fiancee and make her understand that he’s not addict in gambling and he’s still in control, if she accepts it better but if not your cousin have to decide.