Topic: Choosing between your relationship and gambling. - page 3. (Read 329 times)

Women are always very scared of the future of a gambler because they think things can go wrong anytime and there lover can mistakenly and consciously gamble with there future. Everything about this is understanding and the two persons that is involved here should try and settle this matter because I know that, there is no way a gambler will leave gambling because of relationship. The gambling attempt can be reduced but I don't think the urge can be stopped by any means due to the long term issue the man had been playing bets.

I understand how the woman feels because she will about to enter the world of marriage and she surely thinks about their future. Having a gambler's lifetime partner can cause chaos in the future but if the gambler is responsible, she should just accept her future husband's habit. This usual problem could be fixed with the right approach. They can just talk about it before getting married without asking the husband to choose between his habit and their relationship.

A year will never be enough to get to know a person really well and I don't think their love for each other already has a strong foundation. Deciding to get married that early will surely have doubts along thr way as they discover each other's weaknesses.
As for me, it isn't a reason enough to leave a person because he is into gambling especially if you're committed to that person. You must not compare him to other gamblers as long as you don't know how he deals with gambling. Instead of dragging the person down, he should get to know him well first because there are still worse things that they could discover about each other along the way.

There's currently a heated issue between an older cousin of mine and his fiancee, it's a gambling related issue that's now looking like a threat to their relationship. Here's what happened;

My cousin as I know has been an active gambler for as long as I could remember and he's one person that gamble responsibly as he takes it as something that's part of a side hustling and nothing more and he added that the winning streaks he has been getting has really been supportive to him financially too. I get to know this cause that's what he told me when I asked him why does he have to engage in online gambling when he has a good paying job. The disturbing issue here is that a day ago his fiancee whom both have been dating for about a year now, she for the first time had access into his mail and discovered lots of email messages both previous and current from the particular gambling sites he has a gambling account with and her awareness of this has made her to ask my cousin to either chose between quiting from engaging in any form of gambling or ending their relationship.
Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge. And this experience scares her to death having anything to do with anyone she notice that engages in gambles activities especially for someone she's in a serious relationship with, that she can't deal with such reality.

I'll really appreciate to have you share some advise on what decision to take if you were to find yourself in this my cousin shoe. For It's been a difficult moment for him this past two days as he has  been thinking of the financial support he at times get from the gambling wins and at same time his fiancee too.

There's currently a heated issue between an older cousin of mine and his fiancee, it's a gambling related issue that's now looking like a threat to their relationship. Here's what happened;

My cousin as I know has been an active gambler for as long as I could remember and he's one person that gamble responsibly as he takes it as something that's part of a side hustling and nothing more

I get to know this cause that's what he told me when I asked him why does he have to engage in online gambling when he has a good paying job.

The disturbing issue here is that a day ago his fiancee whom both have been dating for about a year now, she for the first time had access into his mail and discovered lots of email messages both previous and current from the particular gambling sites he has a gambling account with and her awareness of this has made her to ask my cousin to either chose between quiting from engaging in any form of gambling or ending their relationship.

Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge.

women's dream is to change someone to be a better man. i suspect the gambling issue is not just what they have been arguing about.
if this is an ultimatum to your cousin then that's it. women wouldn't want your cousin to go deeper into gambling so she makes it a big deal.

it's all up to your cousin though. i suggest listing the advantage and disadvantages when your cousin is with this woman and then he can come up with his decision. if he loves the woman more than anything, he'd choose her.

but tell you, he will still gamble and will make it very private by doing it on the 2nd phone.

I understand the concerns that your cousin's fiancee has, to marry a gambler who is out of control is a big scare for her because she has closely experienced how uncomfortable it is to put up with someone who has gambling disorder. She is in need of reassurance that your cousin who she is about to get married to will not turn out the same way. Your cousin can do that easily by letting her understand that people are different and handle gambling differently. He should be sincere with her and not try to fool her into believing that he has stopped it when he hasn't, that will be bad.

If it gets to the point where he has to choose between gambling and his relationship, that decision is up to him to make, but personally I do not think people that do not want to stop gambling can be forced or cajoled into stoping gambling. People stop gambling when they personally make the decision to quit.

Her reasons is because she has this brother that's into gambling and his gambling habit has led to him selling off important properties of his and some that belongs to the whole family just to meet up with his uncontrollable gambling urge. And this experience scares her to death having anything to do with anyone she notice that engages in gambles activities especially for someone she's in a serious relationship with, that she can't deal with such reality.