The underlying psychological reason people are offended by Monero is because the community's idealism is "we are the underdogs fighting the establishment for the greater good" (with copious delusion, naivete, and repressed selfish motives).
That sums up Monero better than just about any other description I could come up with. So perhaps that explains a good measure of its success and popularity in this community.
Your suggestion is that Monero does not exemplify these things does not hold up against the significant popularity it has gained here.
So anything that smacks of centralization and establishment creates animosity unless it is Bitcoin because Bitcoin has already achieved that ideal (or so the community thinks, but I think we are fooled)
There is no centralization in Monero. It is probably the most decentralized coin project. How can you get any more decentralized than a bunch of people some of whom don't even know each other's names, collaborating on the Internet to work on some code (and a few other resources like a web site, IRC channel, etc.)? That's exactly what it is.
I stand by my belief that what gets a visibility in this environment attracts supporters and detractors, including some very loud and ugly ones. That has been true of
every single coin that has become at all popular (with a couple of exceptions I mentioned such as NMC, because no one seems to pay any attention to it at all), and I certainly wouldn't exclude Bitcoin as you did. Bitcoin gets
plenty of hate, perhaps the most of all (in line with its profile). I think you have missed some of the threads attacking the Bitcoin Foundation or various individual developers or other people involved with Bitcoin.
Have a listen to Andreas' segment about Monero on Let's Talk Bitcoin. He sums up the disgusting level of attacks that comes out of this community and culture
on everything and everyone quite well.
I'm sure you could find something and say "if you got rid of this or change that you would have fewer haters" but it is also likely the case that getting rid of this or changing that would disappoint, disillusion, and drive away some supporters. You simply can't please everyone.
Finally, some of the push back comes in response to statements from our supporters, not us, and to be fair I don't care for some of our supporters either. But we are inclusive, and don't chase anyone away. That includes some polarizing figures.