... Also factor in that I'm moving within a week.
Sure you are.
You seem to have a LARGE problem believing legitimate and plausible things. This isn't "I can turn your 0.5 BTC into 1.0 BTC. Trust me." This is me. Just me.
You didn't believe I was moving "within a week" - I should be out of here Tuesdayish.
You don't believe I have a military record - if you know anyone in the Army who has contacts with recruiters, look me up. I did a stretch in 06. No big deal, nothing fancy. Pull string go boom 13B at Ft. Sill. Nothing to brag about, just another thing to state.
So while I've been open and honest about these particulars about me, you seem more than happy to make random shit up. Prison records, sex offender, blah blah blah. You're a fucking child throwing stones because you can't touch me otherwise.
I've said it before and I'll say it again - I'm surprised no one has labeled me a "fat 12 year old" or threw down the "you live in your mom's basement" or something.
Here's the end of the story. You're sitting there, acting like a child, making up stories and throwing obscene accusations. I'm sitting here paid. Got that? Paid.
I'm going to be taint deep in a pretty hot chick in about five days (give or take), trying not to die from heat exhaustion due to the change in weather. You're still going to be living in fairy tale land involving super detectives, lawsuits that never occur, and other fantasies.
I'll be going back to my normal daily, which (although this isn't exactly bragging material) involves coding for 4-6 hours a day, watching movies, playing a plethora of video games, and generally enjoying my life. Hell, with the change in venue, I'll probably hit Das Bunker or something, tear up Universal, and hit the beach.
So you go ahead. Make your little shit comments about "prison records". Laugh at how I "lie" about everything. I hope that somewhere in your mind, that laughter gradually fades into the echos of nothing - no one is laughing. No one is joking. I'm having an almost cheesy ending, everyone else is gnashing teeth and fantasizing about justice.
Take that with you on your way to your normal day.