Topic: Losing at gambling - page 3. (Read 1195 times)

Addiction, whether to gambling, alcohol, or drugs, is a complex problem. It can damage not just the addict, but also everyone around them, including family, friends, and the community as a whole. In the example of the individual you cited, it's devastating to consider how his behavior affected his family.  Addiction is frequently a symptom of something deeper, such as loneliness, financial stress, or a loss of meaning in life.
 I believe there is significant value in managing addiction through a process known as "harm reduction."
 This strategy focuses on lowering the negative consequences of addictive behavior rather than forcing the person to stop. It is a more empathetic approach, but it can still result in beneficial outcomes. For example, if someone is addicted to gambling, you could work with them to lessen their financial losses rather than asking them to quit immediately.

Obviously the votes shows forgiveness because at once he/she won right?but doing another
wrong decision losing it all in one game but  at least  this will serve it a lesson for not to lose the
same way again and maybe will go home with tons of winning in the coming days.
Maybe because our relationship is not going any bad than what OP is asking, and i believe
this is very rare to happen not seeing any of my friend has this situation.

Always get to know your partner better before getting married, know what they are into and what they aren't into, if what they like doing doesn't sound well for you, do not be blinded by love, find someone else.

There is nothing anyone can use to confuse me that an addict can keep his or her home without one of them getting tired, have you ever leave with a addict in the same roof? It's very hard.

In the end, if they fail to change, everyone closer to them starts keeping their distance, and they will end up alone, can I judge that they are evil people for leaving the addicted person? No way, because I know how it feels to live with an addicted person, either drugs or gambling.

I personally haven't faced this kind of scenario but if ever I'd feel devastated and stressed. It's not just about losing the money, but also losing trust and stability within the relationship. And he/she is my partner, I will communicate with him and encourage him that it's time to stop gambling. I'll support him and seek help to professionals.

not just pretending or pretending, in my opinion we should act normally when the gambling we do ends in defeat, because in my opinion losing at gambling is something that is certain to happen, even if we think hard about it. It won't change the situation, in fact, in my opinion, if we question the losses that occur, it will likely trigger our own emotions and cause excessive gambling with thoughts such as wanting to recover losses, even though this is not recommended.
but if he gambles excessively to the point of spending his savings then I will scold him, because in my opinion it is a stupid act, why should he spend a lot of money on gambling, if that is not the right way to make money. To make money, of course we have to work because it is a necessity, rather than hoping for gambling where it is not clear that we will win. I agree with you, maybe I will also limit him from getting involved in excessive gambling again.

A wise attitude as the head of the household is that you are very wise in making decisions and you apply them in your household, that is, one day your wife loses at gambling and as if you didn't know it, act. relax and be normal, but behind your back your wife definitely already knows and is still watching, in other words you have aims and objectives so that there are no problems in your household, and after that if your wife is found out, she has spent a lot of money in her savings and you just give him a lesson or punishment. but don't divorce her, that's the right action, after all, whether it's your wife, good or bad, you have to accept it happily because you both have promises that must be kept.
But nowadays I don't think there are many people like you, in fact what I know is that if one of the partners makes a mistake in gambling by frequently losing, then the final path is divorce.

I was reading some articles, online, consigning gambling and people addicted to it. That is the reason why I have to come back to this topic to express myself and contribute gambling has been a very big problem to some families. This is because I read an article concerning a man that love drinking at the same time gambling Each time he comes home, he is drunk after spending much money gambling,All he does is to come and lie down and sleep without even thinking about the family if they are all right if they have eaten so therefore it is really a very big problem if you find out that your spouse is an addicted gambler well sometimes I will advise that the person should seek the presence of God to help him stop gambling addiction. A lot of marriages today has been on major problem because of this.

If she loses at gambling, maybe I will act normal as if nothing happened, because I expected it would happen. But when she loses and spends all our family savings, maybe I will be very angry with her, but not to the point where I will divorce her - because after all she is my wife and whatever happens I have to accept that fact, because I made a promise at the altar to love her as she is. But maybe I'll teach her a lesson by not giving her access to our savings anymore and making every effort possible so that she doesn't get involved in gambling again.

They both already had a taste of how losses feels like, why must one of the decide to risk it all on gambling? Thats irresponsible gambling and it won't get to this point in my life unless my spouse was into gambling and I never knew all along.

There will always be a problem if you gamble all the time, now let me just imagine that my woman is into gambling and I detect that she is gambling almost all the time, that's a problem on its own, we need to discuss about it before it get out of hand.

To say the truth, I can't live with someone who isnt in control of their gambling habit, thats if all of a sudden I get married to a gambler, because I wouldn't, I don't want to, its always a time-ticking for gamblers who turned gambling into a hubby, they can at any point in time turn addicted, I would rather not start what I can't finish.

Never happened to me, but the example does not seems as something that is very likely to happen, as if you were to open a joint bank account with your partner, you could specify that in order to make any withdrawal both spouses need to give their approval for this to happen.

So even if a spouse was to experiment a moment in which they lost control of themselves, they could only spend the money they have on hand and not touch the money on the joint bank account.

yeah mate its hard but I managed to give my self a chance in changing and this will never happen again , not in this lifetime .because love my family and I need them more than gambling.

Thank you so much , Yes addiction is just part of my past and will never be my future or present again.

Reading through the thread and the context of the OP, you'd see that the player was making good profits, before everything dwindle down the hill. What would be the reaction of the spouse? In that case where there are no funds to run the family, anymore. Taking loan for the survival of the family is the first move, then setting up other means of income. Both spouses, seem to be generating funds, because the gambler was able to gamble with the family funds. Hence, they only need to wait some time to get stable up using their earnings.

There would be no essence for divorce, provided the spouse love one another. There, you'd notice that love is more important than money. Not every family is held with the bond of money. Separating for the sake of money, only leaves the gambler broken, and could lead him to addiction. Being there for one another is quite important, especially in cases where the person has wronged us and shows some atonement for their mistakes. Going away, takes up much emotional stress from both parties, and can cause anxiety.

To be honest, I have experienced being at the lowest point in my life, including gambling. but in household cases that never happens. therefore, I am very grateful for the experiences I had in my youth. this makes me have more experience so that it doesn't happen again for the umpteenth time. for me, it is very important to review every incident that we go through. in particular, something related to the problem. In the case of gambling, the first rule, winning or losing is something that is important to know and be aware of. eell, related to your question and voting thread.

honestly, I won't answer and speculate. in fact, I don't want to fantasize like that. because, for me, this has a negative element. Moreover, I have never actually experienced this with my partner until this moment. But that doesn't mean we don't have problems. Problems are part of life, so they are normal and how we respond to them. well, so does gambling. it is not uncommon for divorce to occur due to gambling addiction. Usually in cases like this, the mistake is caused by the male partner. because gambling is synonymous with men, even though it shouldn't always be like that. well, for me the question is the opposite of what you said in this thread.

So the question is, how can we avoid what you said in this post. what's more, it's such a terrible thing to have nothing. what you mean is that you may no longer have property, work, etc. so, this should be a reminder for gamblers, not the other way around. hence, the importance of understanding, responsibility that gives birth to self-control. however, it's not easy as I said. because, it is important to train so that we get used to it and have discipline.

In my opinion, this is normal if it happens, because for those who cannot accept defeat, of course it will be difficult for them, where their feelings and thoughts will be affected by excessive gambling and ultimately become addicted. Of course, when you are addicted, it is likely that many problems will occur, including family quarrels, whether because of changes in the attitude of the person addicted or because finances are in disarray. What is clear is that family relationships can become messy with just one person who is addicted to gambling.

Indeed, there have been many cases of divorce because finances have become a mess and that is because one of them is addicted to gambling. What we have to pay attention to is that we have to be able to accept the reality of losses that will definitely occur in gambling. Don't mind the defeat that occurs, because it is a reality that will definitely happen and therefore should be accepted well.

Actions scream, words whisper. Giving allowance for change is important, but when is enough? Choices, not mistakes, are involved in the umpteenth promise. Your partner's repeated offences that drain the family finances are decisions, conscious or not

A firm warning or traumatising action may seem excessive, but sometimes the wake-up call must be loud enough to be heard above repeated failures. Threats are a gamble that generally leads to mistrust and dread, not solutions

Consider accountability instead. Concrete steps. Show me their plan if they're serious about change. What will they do? So how will they prove it? This goes beyond trust to constructing a foundation where promises are backed by deeds. Because we're human, flawed, and changeable if we work hard

In my opinion only a small percentage of gamblers are able to control everything properly and in accordance with the suggested directions, while most others are controlled by gambling and not those who control gambling or in the sense that they gamble on the wrong path, and for the problem of impact, yes it is clear that the impact of mistakes in treating gambling can destroy all aspects of life, losing balance in terms of finance is the main target as a result of wrong gambling and after that problems can spread to many other things, and one of them causes problems in family relationships.

On the other hand, I am not sure that a spouse can accept gracefully about the problems experienced in the family due to activities or habits carried out by their partner that have an impact on family finances, after all, money is the most important thing in life, especially when you are married where there are so many needs that continue to grow and cannot be tolerated. If for example you have a partner who is involved in gambling no matter if they are a fairly responsible gambler then my advice is to try to get your partner to stop from this activity in any way that you think is effective enough, not least because the impact of gambling can get worse over time when your interest is getting higher.

In this case, the head should be hot, but those who can control themselves in this situation can only become a professional gambler. But in my country many gamblers lose all their funds in gambling bets and quarrels and fights among family members often occur. Especially in today's society, because of this gambling, along with violence against women, terrible curses like dowry are always seen. Defeated by the tide, many husbands divorce their wives and commit women abuses and heinous crimes which are not desirable at all.

Yes, that's right, there is still a second room to discuss and find a solution together to overcome this problem. If your partner really feels guilty and apologizes along with promising to change for the better, then clearly there's no harm in giving him a chance. or a second room to try to improve, but I think if for example this is the umpteenth promise, or what it means is that they have said that they want to change for a long time but always make the same mistakes that make your family lose money for free as a result of their partner's actions you then clearly I think this is another thing that must be taken seriously.

I understand that saying is always easier than doing, but if for example the situation is that your partner always makes the same mistake several times then perhaps in my opinion you need to give a firm warning or even do something that could really traumatize your partner, such as threatening him. or whatever.

If after all our money was gone and my spouse admitted the mistake and promised to change for good, then we could talk things properly. Since it's my spouse after all, there's always room for a second chance. I might feel angry at some point but if I feel that the promise is genuine, I need to put trust.

I will now see if a real change is happening as we move on to that bad moment. I hope so that everything will went well.

It's true what you said, after all, if they have experienced the name of addiction, they will most likely only focus on the things that make them addicted. Even if it harms themselves or harms others they tend not to care about it. But it is very bad if we already have a legal partner and we are addicted, of course it will greatly affect finances and may spread to the relationship that is established, where with finances that become unstable, the needs that should be prioritized are always lacking and eventually lead to quarrels, many divorce cases are also caused by unstable finances. Even unstable finances are sometimes not due to gambling alone but because of other things such as not having a job that produces.

In addition, they should not expect more from gambling, because the defeat in gambling is certain. Most of those who gamble are not prepared for the risk of losing their money, so it triggers them to become addicted to gambling which has a bad impact on many things including their own family relationships. I can't imagine what you're saying with everyone in the family being gamblers, maybe they'll put their own selfishness first, maybe they won't care about each other.