Topic: He Used Our Wedding Savings to Play Bet - page 10. (Read 3855 times)

It's the first time I'm reading this thread and also the first time hearing this kind of story, and if that was really a true-life story, it is heartbreaking. For a man to take this kind of action with money that is meant for very important stuff like a wedding (his own wedding), that means he can even do worse in the marriage and may render the woman hopeless. Imagine a situation where the woman is working and earning a salary, but the husband is spending his own salary on gambling and also stealing his wife's money to spend it on gambling too (terrible, right?). It will be so heartbreaking for the woman after calculating how much she has contributed, her time, effort, and emotion—but if I were her, I would not get married to that man, and he would have to provide my money.

Risking your savings? Not smart. That exhilaration, that minuscule chance of winning. However, the odds are against you. A sucker's game. This marriage thing. If you're losing your savings at the slots, you're not ready for the pros. Marriage is about trust, partnership, and lifelong commitment. Its not about gambling your future. Get your priorities straight.

Gambling is a trap. A shiny, seductive trap. It interferes with your head, making you feel in control. But you're not. You pull the lever hoping to win, but usually get nothing. You gamble for fun, not your life savings. Treat it like a night out, not a business plan. Walk away if you cant control yourself. Strength, not weakness. Are you considering marriage? First, organise your finances. That builds great relationships.

I don't think using that savings for the wedding and celebration is a waste, because that phrase disappeared any ain't right mate . Because the savings would have served a greater purpose if it was use in the wedding, than wasting it in gambling. To me that's sign of irresponsible habits of gambling because you can't tell me that , that sake Money he something he could afford to lose , or a spare money he can just risk any how in gambling. I alot of people won't make such mistake no matter are tempting the odds claim to be , because is better to manage the money for the wedding than losing it just like that after years of struggling to gather or saving.

So to me the man was wrong big time, is like he is not Even ready to get married, because for him to think of risking their lives savings in gambling just with the aim of trying to double it is a big sign of him not being ready the first place. But in another scenario if by any chances they gambling endup going his way , am not sure the woman would have even think of complaining the first place she would have be happy with him for taken such risk. The thing is that we don't literally know the full details of the story, but still one should always approach or handle gambling wisely or responsibly.

Look on the situation on such angle: they both saved money for wedding. They have accumulated amount that person lost with 60:40 ratio. Which means he has gambled partly on his own money. Also pay attention on how that woman manipulate "our wedding" and "I have contributed bigger part". This isnt normal for relationship. If its their wedding, their family, then they have lost money, not he. In fact, as they get married, she should be knows her second half better, know what he is able to do, that he is a gambler. Long story short, if she cared so much about wedding budget, she should have managed funds herself, keep them on her bank account, put in safe box, whatever is needed to keep him away from them.

We can look on this situation from that man perspective. He could have blamed her for using all money on wedding dress (a dress that she will wear only once), cake and decorations or accessories (thing they will barely notice and remember during and after wedding)

Why feel sorry for this lady? Her fiancé took a risk and could win (after all, gamblers claim that gambling is a place to make money ) and increase their total savings. This accumulated money would be spent on the wedding: on entertainment, on food, on renting premises for celebrations, etc. In fact, those savings would have disappeared anyway, but in the case of gambling, there were chances to increase this (which probably wouldn't happen at a wedding). In gambling, failures happen and you need to be mentally prepared for this, but winnings are also possible.

If he realizes that he already gets a big loss, he must change for better and not have the same experience. That women did a right thing to cancel her marriage because she may gets another problem if she insist to continue her marriage. She can leave that man that have a serious addiction and search for other man who loves her seriously. When someone gets addicted to gambling, that person will difficult to control himself and can ruins his family.

It is hard to change his bad behavior if he is not serious to do that because when he doesn't do anything, he will difficult to cure his addicted to gambling and even he can becomes deeper in gambling. That woman doesn't have to accept the risks by continuing her marriage and that is a good decision for her to cancel her marriage. She will find another good man that will loves her and will not disappointer her.

People or human beings do really get mistake or able to do such thing but doesnt mean that we would really be making out such ultimatum in relation on what that girl should be making or decisions to be made in between them. There are ones who do really that make out such changes and there are ones who would really be sticking into their bad habit on the moment that they've been forgiven.
Everything would really be just that depending whether they would really be still working out with their relationship or not.It is really just that hard on girls part to move on and make out decisions
because we do know that seeing someone whose really that irresponsible on spending up their wedding money then it would be a solid sign that he doesnt care for you because if
that man is really that minding about on that special day then he wont really be making out decision on spending it on gambling no matter what but well it do ends up on that different direction.

I also have the same empathy with the woman and I am coming to this thread to make comments because really what the man did was not very wrong. And the money was not just small amount but the whole 1.5 millions, that is crazy men. Ok let us assume that the lady might forgive him after much pleading from sympathizers and concerned friends, but where will the man get back that amount to replan everything again.

And as for me if they finally get married, the man will still do that thing again because it is in the blood. Because how can reasonable person would used such amount in gambling? It is not normal and the money was not just for house use but for marriage in that matter.

This post is an example of what an irresponsible person is like. We all have a plan with our saved money, since the money has been saved by both of us, so before doing anything with this money, we should have discussed it together. He should not have been so irresponsible if he had saved the money alone, not just the two of them. The mentioned amount of money was not saved in a moment. The couple needed a lot of time to save this money but the person did not take much time to lose this money. You said here the girl should leave the boy but if the girl leaves the boy then she will not get back her lost money. It would be good for them if they both can compromise again and take things normally and start life afresh.

We all know that someone will definitely experience changes for the better when they experience something that they think has caused them a big loss, but there is no guarantee that they will change for the better in the future. In my opinion, it is not wrong to cancel the marriage, including with women who might ask for their money back, because this is a mistake made by one party alone. and this happens because there is a serious addiction that cannot be removed easily, lack of tolerance for the perpetrator is normal, he just needs to change for the better so that he doesn't disappoint other people again in the future.

Even though the perpetrator may promise to change his bad behavior, trust is lost, it will be difficult to recover it, and perhaps the trauma that is felt is normal if the perpetrator cannot be accepted anymore. Moreover, of course there are thoughts that might think that the perpetrator could still disappoint him another day. unless this woman is ready to accept her own risk if she accepts the man again who has disappointed her greatly.

It is true that there is nothing wrong with using savings for things that are really needed, but using savings for gambling is not a good action. What you say is correct, things like this must be paid attention to because in my opinion this case does not only happen once, there are many other gamblers who are not even married but they are addicted to gambling to the point where they can use their savings to gamble and they are even in debt because they are addicted to gambling. The bad impacts that occur are caused by our own actions, because gambling itself does not force players to spend all their money gambling.
maybe a woman's sense of trust will decrease when that happens and will try to accept the man back, also no one knows whether this man will change his bad habits or not if he can still be accepted by the woman, building a household is not an easy matter So if the man can't change his bad habits and will disappoint his partner again, I think the woman will be very hurt. Therefore, we have to be smart in choosing a partner, because being married forever is no joke.

If that is a wrong person which she will marry and finally, they are cancel the wedding, that will be a good decision because she will not suffer in the rest of her life because she will not be with a gambler who thinks that he can makes money from gambling. She can find another person who will be good than previous person. She can learn from her mistake and be careful when she wants to having a relationship with another man.

She doesn't have to saving her money with a wrong person and she can start from beginning while she can prepare her own future with a right person. Maybe her story was disgraceful thing but she was lucky knowing what her fiancee do before she married him. At least, she can forget that man and not thinks too much about him and she can focus with her life.

You say you feel pity for her, but i'm happy for her.   $3000  of her own money is a small price to pay compared to a lifelong commitment to a pos. And tbh i don't think that amount of money could be that much for her, if they were willing to spend it on a single day of pageantry, what i mean is i don't think she's going to be homeless because of it. She was treated horrible, but it did work out for the best. Unless she's the type to continue her relationship with him without learning her lesson.

Yeah, it's indeed a very hurtful and heartbreaking, very true about the issue being one that one can hardly recover from both mentally, financially, and emotionally.
I often come back to this story and after reading, I try to imagine myself in the woman's position, and what I usually do feel is regrets, alot of it.

And it's very disappointing that some gamblers lack self control, and their actions end up giving gambling in general a very bad name, many people in our contemporary society today consider gambling a very bad and ill-moral thing for one to engage in, simply becuase of stories like this, and this is something we all must always learn from, to make ourselves better gamblers.

That what we call "martyr", Lol, after what your man has done to you, you try to be careful with him and stay thru thick in thin. But in this example, maybe the mindset of the woman is that his man might change for the better. But they even married and yet the man has the audacity to trick her and used their wedding saving.

In any case, we can really judge the woman here. But as fellow gamblers, what the man did was out of line and we can't tolerate that kind of things as it's very hurtful and for sure it's hard to recover mentally and financially.

Lol...I am with you on this. You see, a lot of people do not know how this law and justice work, but you can't blame them, it is what they were born into, so they think it is normal. Just like in my country, anything goes, you will see police involving themselves in ridiculous things out of their duty even as many are using them to oppress their fellow citizens just for a little tip or because they have a relationship/affiliation with the police one way to another. It got worse to the point that military guys would be seen anyhow on the stress harassing the citizens and people are using them for civil disputes, which could be in some insignificant cases that even the lowest ranked vigilante shouldn't have gotten himself involved.

So in countries where this is happening, you can't expect short of what the guy said, people can do and undo, and in the case of the main OP, it all depends on the fiancee on how to take the matter up in such countries. But she should know that the marriage is over if she follows that path as well. A husband or wife can also use the police in this case, everything goes, and even a brother can use it against his father or anyone. You can imagine how it is. Regardless, the right approach is to use a lawyer, but you also have to know that this is only happening in sane countries and every country in the world can't be sane.

Exactly, but unfortunately, there are still many cases when the girl is still faithful even though the guy has done something wrong before thewedding. It is unimaginable how it will be when they continue until marriage but indeed, at least if they are able to be self-aware maybe their lives will be fine. But,  if they are unable to be self-aware, then ofcourse their lives will be destroyed but what is unfortunate is that they say their lives are destroyed because of gambling. After all,  it is basically the person themselves who does not have good self-control so that the wedding money is still used for gambling, it is clearly their own fault.

On the other hand, I think it is quite believable that the man loves his partner so that he and his partner can plan to hold a wedding party at the time they have agreed, and regarding this terrible incident, in my opinion, the scenario is that it seems like he experienced a lot of defeats at that time when carrying out His gambling session in which he lost big made him really emotional so that his level of consciousness was reduced which ultimately made him decide to gamble the amount of money that should have been used for marriage expenses with his partner.

And I think that is a very possible scenario for an addicted gambler to experience, because they have a very aggressive approach to their gambling activities which may be caused by a wrong understanding of what gambling actually is like, and also when they lose they will usually be very emotions that make them lose control, meaning that I will not say that he does not love his partner, but because the man has entered the addiction phase then of course various aggressive actions and decisions are very likely to be carried out, and I am sure he takes these decisions when his consciousness is decreasing.

Guy if two people have no money to marry at once then the reasonable and responsible man and woman planned and agreed to save little by little and in the process if they like to buy things that are most important in the marriage then from there they can buy things so that they won't stress themselves in the marriage month or week. And a good woman must support her fiance. So what the girl did was not a bad thing and what the man dis was very bad and he doesn't need second chance because if he used the preplanned marriage funds to play gamble then he will definitely use feeding money in the house to play gamble.

To achieve a better is not from gambling but from investment. Gambling is just a passive income and not a regular income avenue. I don't like supporting nonsense. And if the girl forgive him and they finally come together again to plan the. They have to start from the beginning again and if they rise small funds he will still use it to play gamble and tell the girl that he wanted to make better life for both of them. That is nonsense.

           -   It's not clear if the woman has divorced the guy. But always, in such situations or conditions, the woman probably won't stay with the guy to marry, unless the guy shows sincerity in asking for a call and finds a way to make their marriage work again.

Because it is really stupid to use the funds reserved for the wedding day of the woman who will be with you for the rest of your life. It seems as if the guy just made a decision like that; he is immediately irresponsible. But what I'm wondering is that the girl didn't even oppose the guy's decision.