Topic: Support, do not criticize. - page 8. (Read 1163 times)

Someone who made a decision that they are going cold turkey method for stopping their gambling addiction then one important thing they need to do is cut down anyone who they are connected with their gambling activities no matter the person is someone very close to you. I bet the one who really cares about you will encourage you for making such efforts to stay away from something that makes you financially and mentally weak.

Indeed, stopping gambling addiction must be done, because it is for the good of yourself and your family, if they stop gambling based on the motive of improving their finances then that is good, because someone who is addicted to gambling will certainly have major problems with their finances, where they will only think about gambling. only when you have money. and if they are aware of this, they want to stop being addicted to improve their finances then they must be supported, we all know that quitting gambling addiction is not easy, therefore it is natural that there are gambling addicts who are in the process of stopping gambling but are in the middle of the process. they return to gambling again and might be said to have failed, but this can be prevented by having support from other people such as friends, relatives or family who remind them what the purpose of stopping gambling is for, and maybe in this way they can realign their goals. someone who is addicted to gambling. That's why it's important for an addict who wants to stop to be accompanied and guided, but I think if they have family or friends there will definitely be someone who wants to accompany the process of those who want to leave their gambling addiction. I believe that those who try to stop gambling without a clear goal or clear motive are likely to fail to stop gambling.

Most gamblers who want to stop their addiction fail when they are in the middle of the process and return to gambling which may even become even crazier with the gambling they do. Quitting an addiction is not an easy matter, even though there is support from other people, there are often problems that occur that trigger an addict to return to gambling, such as seeing their friends win at gambling. This can influence the thinking of those who are in the process of recovering from their addiction who may have the thought "my friend can win, but I can't win". To be able to stop being addicted to gambling, I think they have to be able to refrain from all things that trigger gambling, such as the environment where there are currently a lot of people gambling and I think this is an obstacle for those who want to stop their addiction. Supporting an addict who wants to recover from his addiction is a good thing. Don't mock him by breaking his spirit, that's not a good thing to do.

If those people are in my circle of friends or to those whom i've known then i would make out those kind of suggestions and advises but if its a complete stranger and i have seen him somewhere about those kind of actions then i wont really be that too confidently be able to make those kind of approach specially if its a stranger. I dont like on getting scolded or would really be told that mind your own business, its not your money
or something with those kind of words on which its not really that shocking on this way and this is why if ever i do see someone then better they should be responsible on the actions that they are taking.

Criticism would really be just that normal i should say yet human beings are naturally that on having that kind of behavior. Just let them be on which there are ones who are really that in concern
and there are ones who dont really care and this is something that would really be normal. Criticize or not it doesnt matter. The only ones who could solve out those addiction
problems are to those people who are on such condition. Self realization would be the key.

I don't get the logic behind your statement.
So if you criticize a gambling addict(who is trying to stop), he will feel guilty and he will start gambling again? This doesn't make any sense.
Who is going to criticize a gambling addict, that is actively fighting his addiction? I know that most gambling addicts try to keep their personal issues a secret. Maybe most of them are afraid that they will get embarrassed and ridiculed for revealing their inner struggle.
Everyone with a brain will always try to support a struggling gambling addict. Only the psychopaths/sociopaths would say "nah, you should keep gambling, because it feels good".

Support or tell them. Some people, family, or friends don't like telling the gambling addict that he is an addict. Why? They are scared he/she might get offended in the process. It's a fact, why will they be offended by it? If they get mad about us telling the truth to them then at least we will give him/her something to think of.
I mean, that will somehow give him a wound that maybe he will try to patch until it is healed. If not, then at least we tried.
In the end, they cannot blame us because we did tell him about what was going on although we didn't have a chance to help out because he kicked us out as soon as we told the truth to him.
Some people have this kind of problem too, they don't want others telling them the truth, they want to be supported/encouraged by their addiction or they want to keep people away from them so they will be left alone with their bad habit.
It's easy to say we should help them, but what if he doesn't want help? Should we force it? I think it could get worse if that happens.

I am myself in such situation yet very few people know I am gambling so I try to encourage myself even though I in some instances go back to gambling.A good way that is working for me is to play little money and spend more time by doing so in choosing the currency that has value like IDR.To me this is working,as I get bored after spending time playing and am not spending more than 20-30 dollars,an amount which is ridiculous nowadays.So yes encourage and support is the way to go.

Thanks for this generous support , it seems that you are either experiencing addiction or someone
near you does because you have something coming inside you from those words you deliver here, but I support
all you said here because it is not an easy battle in which majority of fighter have lose the battle , because its
hard to deny the fact that addicted gamblers will do everything just to have a bet and try their best to win like
what my cousin do before he ended up in rehabilitation.

the reality is that most persons that are suffering from addiction don't always see the need to speak out and in most instances they will keep struggling in Thier addictive lifestyle until it directly and evidently tell on them.

It's practically difficult to understand what an addict is going through and sometimes you might find yourself being a bit judgmental about his behaviour but addiction is real and  if you are in a possible to bring a fellow out do it with all you've got because anybody can get addicted and it takes others to basically bring an addict out of his plight.

Exactly, I experienced same wave as yours, I came to my senses and retracted my steps, was not an easy experience to look very stupid to yourself after realizing your mistakes, the criticism most times comes from within and you've to deal with it yourself. Unless you've built an encouragement mindset and remain very optimistic of yourself no matter what happens.

there's a kind of criticism called constructive criticism

What is constructive criticism?
Constructive criticism is a feedback method that offers specific, actionable recommendations for change and improvement. Good constructive feedback facilitates positive outcomes and creates a positive working environment. It also provides a safe space where a person feels secure enough to ask questions, seek help, and share ideas.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.betterup.com/blog/how-to-give-and-receive-constructive-criticism-at-work%3fhs_amp=true

You can see from the above that criticism isn't totally bad and its necessary for effective change. I  understand you're referring to destructive criticism which is more of destroying the person verbally. You're right in that aspect, but I just want to help you get specific.

Yes, you should never "punish" people with criticism for trying to improve themselves, but should also not be to soft on them.

A lot of these people need some tough love, to get them to deal with their situation.

They must admit that they have a problem and then they must reach out for help, those people that say that they are not addicted, will avoid the issue and continue as normal.

Do not step on people when they are down, rather reach out and help them to get back on their feet again.

A few months ago I experienced a loss of control over my gambling. It seemed like I became a gambling addict at that time but I soon realized it and I admit that it is difficult to stop and take back control of ourselves. So I really agree with you, we have to support if there are people who want to stop gambling because it's not an easy thing.

Before it's too late, it's a good idea to control ourselves or better stop because there are very scary risks if we continue to be addicted gambling. But sometimes there are friends who like to be naughty. When we wanted to stop, they even gave us a small tip on our account so we wanted to try again, which was very annoying. I have not decided to stop gambling but I have limited my allocation for gambling, hopefully I can maintain this limit so that my financial condition does not deteriorate again like before.

Then the most people that could provide that support is the gambler's family, because imagine if the family itself will not support their family member because of that gambling addiction, then it will be devastating for that gambler. With the support and love of the family, the gambler will feel that he is not alone, and with the help of diverting his attention, it will help him in the sense that he can slowly forget about gambling. The recovery or change should be done slowly because suddenly stopping the gambler's addiction will only increase his urge to gamble. Let's remember that not all people or gamblers suffering from addiction don't receive the support they need from their own families, so they will seek out others's support, or worse, they will only divert their attention to gambling. So people shouldn't ignore those gambling addicts if they show a sign of wanting to change.

Supporting someone who wants to stop their gambling addiction can encourage them to continue doing it. Instead of mocking them, it's better to support what they do. It is a good decision if they really want to stop their gambling addiction.

Maybe it will be hard for them but with support from us and others, they won't feel it. They can go through every process they have to do until they can recover. Continuing to support them and reminding them that they can stop gambling will make them not give up before they succeed in stopping gambling.

With support from the people around them, those who are addicted to gambling will see that they can still have a normal life. They will continue to heal even though it is not easy. They have received enough criticism, which might finally bring them to their senses. By continuing to support them, they can cure their gambling addiction.

Criticizing somebody about gambling when dey want to stop, depend on the type of person who you wish to advice about calling it a quit. There are aggressive or addicted gambles and also people whom are not agresive. Those whom are aggressive are the ones that wouldn't want you to explain anything to them, they see anything you tell them as insult and may never listen to you no matter how polite you may say it to them. This kind of people if you tell them politely and yet they became adamant and stagnant in gambling all you need is to handle it in a harsh or disgraceful way. because most people don't like it when you are cool on them. But the less aggressive ones don't have much problem. All what they need is a little advice to make them reduce the habit because they have not yet rooted to the gambling system so such people don't need too much explanation to retrace back their step. So in advising a gambler you must know the type of gambler and how addicted he may be.

I don't know what someone is thinking when they criticize a gambling addict who wants to change his addiction. Why do they criticize someone who wants to change? Isn't that a good thing when they want to change. What a gambling addict needs is moral support, so that they can be strong in changing their addiction. Because it is not an easy thing to stop a gambling addiction, it takes a strong determination to be able to fight their urge to gamble and criticism might be able to destroy it all.

We have to normalize this one, and if you have nothing good to say to anyone, better not to say it because everyone if fighting their own battle. That addicted gambler is trying his/her best to recover, it will not be easy of course and might need your help to understand and to give support, don't criticize it instead give your full support and encourage that addicted gambler to do its best to fully recover, this will take time.

Actually, trying to advise a friend who is addicted to gambling is the right thing, but sometimes many people are not good at conveying their advice with criticism which will most likely make the heart and mind of the addicted gambler unable to understand and accept it well.
If we want to stop a friend who is addicted to gambling, it's a good idea to understand the inner character of the addict so that we can use safe methods to avoid misunderstandings.

The problem with gambling addiction is the society sees the addicted people as some criminals that could be put in line with some spanking or a grounding. While in reality most of them are battling themselves everyday to bring back their life on track. Not letting someone gamble for a month or two won't make the habit go away.
In order to solve the gambling addiction, we need to find the mental state of the individual and treat them accordingly.
There could be different reasons why people find comfort being indulged in gambling. They might be lonely and find the sense of existence through gambling.
Gambling could be a result or a distraction from severe depression. Sometimes physical conditions like hormonal imbalance too might lead to an addiction. That's why it's better to help and seek help socially and medically.

That's right, criticizing is also important but it depends on the criticism and if the criticism is just to remind you that something is wrong or inappropriate or could be detrimental to yourself, in my opinion that's okay and just a reminder. And being firm is also okay because stopping addiction is not as easy as we imagine and we need to do it firmly but with motivation.
Support must be provided, people who are addicted must have people closest to them such as family, friends and others who will provide support. However, it cannot be denied that they will definitely criticize him, but it is not criticism that intimidates him, it only makes him realize that it is wrong.

I agree with what you have said but we can't control what people would tell as they are not expert in this kind of things, they will only tell what's on their heart and mind. Some of them might think mocking them would only pursue them to not play anymore after they were criticized and some of them would take it personally and would be more addictive to it. Either way, it's still better if you would go to an expert for help as they would give you different kind of rehabilitation to keep you away from gambling and to discover other things that you can do aside from gambling.

Now, it's important to us that if we are not sure what we are doing or if we would be able to help the person by giving comments, it's better to keep our comments in ourself as we don't know the effects of it to other people. (it might work for you but not for others)