"Had I know"
Do you know that even some people knew the outcome of their actions, it will not still discourage or stop them from doing what they have planned to do. The outcomes me of decision making does.not scare some decision makers so they can be very reckless with decision making at times. There is no decision that doesn't have an outcome, and as a decision maker, always consider the outcome of your decisions before you make up your mind about them.
Topic: Our decision making is responsible for the outcomes in our ways - page 8. (Read 1700 times)
The biggest enemy is the ego within us, and this cannot be eliminated within us, but we can control it well. Where sometimes we do things beyond our capabilities and limits, just to satisfy momentary desires and just to show that we look capable. We go on holiday just to breathe fresh air and relieve fatigue and stress, as well as to brag to others that we are on holiday and shopping in a special place, but when we get home we are stressed again because we have run out of money, and what's worse is that we have to take out a loan to be able to continue living. This is what often happens to some people who are unable to manage their finances well.
Therefore, keep trying to find out how we can manage our finances well, because today we have to live and tomorrow we have to live, today we have needs and so will tomorrow, all of which we have to fulfill. Try to control your ego and desires well, don't want to appear capable of being accepted by the public. Because when we are able to manage our finances well, and reach the peak of having financial freedom. So without the need for us to show and brag about what we have to other people, people will know that we not only look capable, but are really capable.
Therefore, keep trying to find out how we can manage our finances well, because today we have to live and tomorrow we have to live, today we have needs and so will tomorrow, all of which we have to fulfill. Try to control your ego and desires well, don't want to appear capable of being accepted by the public. Because when we are able to manage our finances well, and reach the peak of having financial freedom. So without the need for us to show and brag about what we have to other people, people will know that we not only look capable, but are really capable.
You could never control how other people spending their money, because that's their money, but I agree that your friend is bad person, the best thing is just stay way from that kind of friends.
Bad person (taking bad as being evil/wicked)? Being extravagant does not mean being a bad person... The guy might be remorseful because he does not give value to his money but that does not make a person bad. So having no money and asking people for help makes the person bad now?
Quote
Maybe he keep doing those reckless spending because he think he got you and his other friends as safety net, by being away and refuse to loan him some money you could help him realize that what he had done is reckless and could give him inconvenience.
I do not think that he does that reckless spending because he has someone to support him, some people never think of their future and live by the moment. Probably that is the kind of person @OP's is talking about.
Quote
Some people make a good decision in some aspect and then make completely reckless decision in spending their money, probably because they come from poor parent that doesn't even have money to manage, thus they never learnt how to manage money. Then when they finally can get their own money they don't know how to use it wisely. But some of them would learn eventually.
And that does not make a person bad (evil)...
He live an extravagant live but he bothers his friend by borrowing his friend's money, he doesn't consider that his friend also need the money. If he want to live an extravagant live, then he should earn enough money so he doesn't give bad financial influence to his friend by asking to borrow money, I didn't mean he is like evil, he just a bad friend, that is just bad enough for me to stay way from that kind of friend. At least by staying away from him I wouldn't need to loan him some money, and by not loaning him some money he might be able to reconsider his spending because he can't no longer borrow money from me, he might find someone else, but then that's other people problem and decision.
I don't find his ignorance to be an excuse and I am thinking of disassociating from him before he gets me affected with his negative possesed energies.
A very good friend indeed..., isn't now the time to show your concern? Why avoid your friend now?
You could never control how other people spending their money, because that's their money, but I agree that your friend is bad person, the best thing is just stay way from that kind of friends.
Bad person (taking bad as being evil/wicked)? Being extravagant does not mean being a bad person... The guy might be remorseful because he does not give value to his money but that does not make a person bad. So having no money and asking people for help makes the person bad now?
Quote
Maybe he keep doing those reckless spending because he think he got you and his other friends as safety net, by being away and refuse to loan him some money you could help him realize that what he had done is reckless and could give him inconvenience.
I do not think that he does that reckless spending because he has someone to support him, some people never think of their future and live by the moment. Probably that is the kind of person @OP's is talking about.
Quote
Some people make a good decision in some aspect and then make completely reckless decision in spending their money, probably because they come from poor parent that doesn't even have money to manage, thus they never learnt how to manage money. Then when they finally can get their own money they don't know how to use it wisely. But some of them would learn eventually.
And that does not make a person bad (evil)...
I don't know man, the reason for why I don't have this kind of attitude towards money is from the fact that I'm not earning enough from all of my income streams, even though I do my best at getting them all, I only have a limited time and energy in a day so there's not a lot that I can do about it even if I've got the skills, it's still problematic for me.
Regards to your friend issue, let him be, a person that's not asking to be saved won't ask to be saved, you feel me? They will ask for your opinion about how they spend their money when they feel like it, mind your own business and you can't really force everyone to think like you anyway, even if they're your friends. Just think of this as a delayed gratification when the time comes that their actions haunt them, that "I told you so" from you and "I should've listened to you" from him would be really satisfying, that is if you're still friends in the future.
You're right you don't have to live a flamboyant life that you can only afford in the moment knowing quite well that you don't have enough to continue your grooves. That's ridiculous to even have such good times as a memory at when you can't afford them again. Regards to your friend issue, let him be, a person that's not asking to be saved won't ask to be saved, you feel me? They will ask for your opinion about how they spend their money when they feel like it, mind your own business and you can't really force everyone to think like you anyway, even if they're your friends. Just think of this as a delayed gratification when the time comes that their actions haunt them, that "I told you so" from you and "I should've listened to you" from him would be really satisfying, that is if you're still friends in the future.
And so also, everyone can not think the same even though you walks together. In life sometimes we are just temporarily merged in the positions are could be because we're not fit in or matched together. Only little humours that's keeping us and a little itch could cut every connections off.
I think the Op has tried as much as he could Pointing the lapses of his friend right before him while he was ignorant to his doings. But Op I don't think your pulling back from him would be the best of it, verbally or otherwise you can still assist him or he's willing to be a change man but it he can't then take your leave and don't walk all long with people that can't align with you when you're trying to make some senses otherwise you'd be infected with the negative energies just you said earlier and moreso, @pinggoki has also said that "had I know" would be ringing like the sound track to him at when there's no way out for his rescue anymore.
Don't stress yourself out at Op
"Had I know"
Do you know that even some people knew the outcome of their actions, it will not still discourage or stop them from doing what they have planned to do. The outcomes me of decision making does.not scare some decision makers so they can be very reckless with decision making at times. There is no decision that doesn't have an outcome, and as a decision maker, always consider the outcome of your decisions before you make up your mind about them. A friend of mine goes wild at me whenever I talk to him about his reckless spendings, he ask me what would be accounted of his money if not enjoyments?
And after squandering all that he has saved he goes about requesting to borrow money.
And after squandering all that he has saved he goes about requesting to borrow money.
You could never control how other people spending their money, because that's their money, but I agree that your friend is bad person, the best thing is just stay way from that kind of friends. Maybe he keep doing those reckless spending because he think he got you and his other friends as safety net, by being away and refuse to loan him some money you could help him realize that what he had done is reckless and could give him inconvenience.
Some people make a good decision in some aspect and then make completely reckless decision in spending their money, probably because they come from poor parent that doesn't even have money to manage, thus they never learnt how to manage money. Then when they finally can get their own money they don't know how to use it wisely. But some of them would learn eventually.
Our decision sometimes is wrong and sometimes right. Having poor financial management will simply lead to emptying our wallets and even committing debts. We are lucky if we don't have that kind of attitude toward our money but never we have to ask other people to live like us knowing that it is their life as well. Let us just think that if they are in this situation today, they soon realize about their mistakes in handling their money and change. Some people are just enjoying life even if they have a small income and we can't take and stop that. It is a matter of choice, the good thing for us who have good knowledge in managing our income/expenses, we never struggle hard during crisis.
In everyday living then every decisions that we do make could neither give out that positive or negative impact. No one really knows until it would happen.It is really just that in every decisions that we do take then we do always choose up on whats best for us, if it turns out to be negative then well just simply move on to the next.
There are particular moments or situations on which you would be needing to take up such decision if you do really want to have those changes or whatsoever.
You wont really be able to know the result or outcomes if you wont really be making out such decision.
Whatever the outcome it would be then it would really be reflecting out on what are the decisions that you had made. This is why in every decision
then it should really be something that needs up to be carefully be mind off.
Our decision sometimes is wrong and sometimes right. Having poor financial management will simply lead to emptying our wallets and even committing debts. We are lucky if we don't have that kind of attitude toward our money but never we have to ask other people to live like us knowing that it is their life as well. Let us just think that if they are in this situation today, they soon realize about their mistakes in handling their money and change. Some people are just enjoying life even if they have a small income and we can't take and stop that. It is a matter of choice, the good thing for us who have good knowledge in managing our income/expenses, we never struggle hard during crisis.
While others have learnt their lessions of not utilizing their incomes when they had a stable source for their income flows, some others are paying adamants and ignorant to learn from what has happened to others because they feels they are not of the same calling to be affected with what happened to others.
I agree on some points, sometimes we thought that our income are going to be steady and going to be stable. But this is not how it works, most of the time there will be unexpected events in your life. And when you thought that you will have that kind of job your dream one with big pays and other benefits, suddenly the company closes or at least the client didn't renew their contract. This happen to me not just once but twice. So I just learn how to save as much as I can, to have at least some money in the bank for 6 months as a buffer in cases of emergencies and if this thing happen specially if you have family to feed and give them shelter 24x7. Life is unfair if you think about it. There are people who are well off in life, buy you yourself will have to struggling, but that's it, you should give up and move on.
What I personally believe is that we should find the balance between enjoyment and practicality. Sometimes, I think it’s good to indulge yourself and let you enjoy your hard-earned money.
Of course it shouldn’t be to the point of irresponsibility and at the expense of others. You still need to have some sort of control when it comes to your finance. You don’t want to prioritize money over anything so it’s ok to let go sometimes.
Of course it shouldn’t be to the point of irresponsibility and at the expense of others. You still need to have some sort of control when it comes to your finance. You don’t want to prioritize money over anything so it’s ok to let go sometimes.
That's how money is, whatever income we currently earn, if we don't manage it well then the results of our hard work to get it have no meaning at all, except to satisfy a momentary desire, such as going on holiday. , shopping, or other waste.
And that doesn't mean I forbid you from going on holiday or shopping, because we also need to please ourselves, just to relieve stress and boredom. This can be done, but with a note, that we will go on holiday to the place we dream of or shop to buy the things we want, this is done after meeting certain needs, saving and investing. Only then can we be called wise in managing income and expenses. Don't let your needs not be met, we force ourselves to go on holiday or shop, because that will only cause quite complicated financial problems (a problem that we created ourselves).
And that doesn't mean I forbid you from going on holiday or shopping, because we also need to please ourselves, just to relieve stress and boredom. This can be done, but with a note, that we will go on holiday to the place we dream of or shop to buy the things we want, this is done after meeting certain needs, saving and investing. Only then can we be called wise in managing income and expenses. Don't let your needs not be met, we force ourselves to go on holiday or shop, because that will only cause quite complicated financial problems (a problem that we created ourselves).
As long as you are responsible with your actions, you don't need to worry. Definitely, having some relaxation is I also believe a must. Just to breath a lil bit of fresh air can possibly give us better perspectives in life. And who knows, once you got back from your holiday, you will be more productive than ever. Sometimes we need to pause our stressful lives to get new insights on what we are heading to.
That's how money is, whatever income we currently earn, if we don't manage it well then the results of our hard work to get it have no meaning at all, except to satisfy a momentary desire, such as going on holiday. , shopping, or other waste.
And that doesn't mean I forbid you from going on holiday or shopping, because we also need to please ourselves, just to relieve stress and boredom. This can be done, but with a note, that we will go on holiday to the place we dream of or shop to buy the things we want, this is done after meeting certain needs, saving and investing. Only then can we be called wise in managing income and expenses. Don't let your needs not be met, we force ourselves to go on holiday or shop, because that will only cause quite complicated financial problems (a problem that we created ourselves).
And that doesn't mean I forbid you from going on holiday or shopping, because we also need to please ourselves, just to relieve stress and boredom. This can be done, but with a note, that we will go on holiday to the place we dream of or shop to buy the things we want, this is done after meeting certain needs, saving and investing. Only then can we be called wise in managing income and expenses. Don't let your needs not be met, we force ourselves to go on holiday or shop, because that will only cause quite complicated financial problems (a problem that we created ourselves).
I think there are people like this who will always squandered all that they have before looking for ways to earn more money.
People like this don't understand the term 'save for a rainy day' because to them their enjoyment comes first.
The problem is there is no convincing such people, only life can teach them a lesson that's if they will ever learn.
You can only keep advising him as a friend but the rest is up to him to figure out.
People like this don't understand the term 'save for a rainy day' because to them their enjoyment comes first.
The problem is there is no convincing such people, only life can teach them a lesson that's if they will ever learn.
You can only keep advising him as a friend but the rest is up to him to figure out.
Some people have the mentality that they will always have money, so they don't care about saving for the future. They fail to understand that a time will come when they might not have the strength or opportunity to earn money. Each time I see elderly people engage in manual jobs, I am reminded that a time will come when I need to rest instead of engaging in a full-time job. And the means of retiring at the right time is to save and invest for the future.
You can only advise a grown-up man and cannot force him to make a decision. Life is a choice and an adult has the right to choose what he wants. Your friend should bear the repercussions of his action alone but you can help him if you also join him in lavishing his money. I don't lend money to such people because they might not be able to pay back since they don't have an adequate financial plan that guides their spending.
It has become a common thing these days. A lot of people who earn good money don't save when they can and they regret this when they fall flat on the face of earth. When they are earning more than enough, they overspend their money, live luxurious lives, buy cars, and materialistic things, and try to enjoy their life as much as they can, however, they don't think about the future and it takes a blink of an eye for time to change.
Just like your friend, anyone in such a situation where they are still doing very well, earning a lot of money and have a lot of credit left won't understand if you try to school them until the time when they have everything spent and have nothing left. That is when they realize their mistakes but to no avail.
Just like your friend, anyone in such a situation where they are still doing very well, earning a lot of money and have a lot of credit left won't understand if you try to school them until the time when they have everything spent and have nothing left. That is when they realize their mistakes but to no avail.
As the others have already stated, it's not really your business to change their lifestyle and that disassociation is going to be a bad thing for you especially as a friend. Let me put in some sense on those two matters that I've agreed upon:
1. Minding your own business would definitely take you far in life, you meddle too much and you'd end up having to deal with trouble and at the same time you also end having no time to deal with your own problems because you're too much involved with the life of your friend, if they want to be miserable then let them be, that's how they want to live. Think of it this way, if you're in his situation, what're you going to do? And are you going to want your friend to be pestering you about all this stuff?
I know that we all want to save someone from their misery but there's just not that many people that want the saving and to me this all sounds like trying to be self-righteous, that you're the one that's more moral and a very nice exemplary.
2. I can't recommend disassociation to some degree because there's the factor of how long you've been friends with that person, it's definitely a problem if you're childhood friends or that you've been friends for a long time, this isn't the kind of thing that should crack a friendship, the reason is too petty in my opinion and the only time that I believe that a disassociation or friendship termination is valid when that friend's been asking money for them to gamble or that you feel like if you stick to this kind of person, that you're not going to go anywhere in your life.
1. Minding your own business would definitely take you far in life, you meddle too much and you'd end up having to deal with trouble and at the same time you also end having no time to deal with your own problems because you're too much involved with the life of your friend, if they want to be miserable then let them be, that's how they want to live. Think of it this way, if you're in his situation, what're you going to do? And are you going to want your friend to be pestering you about all this stuff?
I know that we all want to save someone from their misery but there's just not that many people that want the saving and to me this all sounds like trying to be self-righteous, that you're the one that's more moral and a very nice exemplary.
2. I can't recommend disassociation to some degree because there's the factor of how long you've been friends with that person, it's definitely a problem if you're childhood friends or that you've been friends for a long time, this isn't the kind of thing that should crack a friendship, the reason is too petty in my opinion and the only time that I believe that a disassociation or friendship termination is valid when that friend's been asking money for them to gamble or that you feel like if you stick to this kind of person, that you're not going to go anywhere in your life.
While others have learnt their lessions of not utilizing their incomes when they had a stable source for their income flows, some others are paying adamants and ignorant to learn from what has happened to others because they feels they are not of the same calling to be affected with what happened to others.
In life some persons just do what pleases them and doesn't tolerate with any piece of advice from anyone at the times they feels to had acquired the heavens on earth. And yet they are not Concious that as the more they grows their incomes for multiplications is also how it could depreciate to a zero value if not utilize productively for continues growth.
A friend of mine goes wild at me whenever I talk to him about his reckless spendings, he ask me what would be accounted of his money if not enjoyments?
This is a kind of guy that feels relaxed when he has an attractive amount of money in his bank account and then feels he is only supposed to go after making more money only when he is running out from the one already accumulated and spent.
How on earth would someone give chasing after income holidays even when you do not have more than enough and not up to the age of retirement yet?
And after squandering all that he has saved he goes about requesting to borrow money.
I have talked to this guy on several occasions but he feels I am a pest disturbing his dear life.
As at this moment, the country is encountering very high rate of inflation which stuffs doesn't go fair as before leading him sold his car and being struggling to pay his bills while living in the city and at now, he does not have a place of residence of his own so he jumps from one place to the other passing his night's.
He is now the pest perching on any available places conditionally while inconveniencing others.
He now lives a low key with the best he can afford.
"Had I know" is now a national anthem to him.
I don't find his ignorance to be an excuse and I am thinking of disassociating from him before he gets me affected with his negative possesed energies.
In life some persons just do what pleases them and doesn't tolerate with any piece of advice from anyone at the times they feels to had acquired the heavens on earth. And yet they are not Concious that as the more they grows their incomes for multiplications is also how it could depreciate to a zero value if not utilize productively for continues growth.
A friend of mine goes wild at me whenever I talk to him about his reckless spendings, he ask me what would be accounted of his money if not enjoyments?
This is a kind of guy that feels relaxed when he has an attractive amount of money in his bank account and then feels he is only supposed to go after making more money only when he is running out from the one already accumulated and spent.
How on earth would someone give chasing after income holidays even when you do not have more than enough and not up to the age of retirement yet?
And after squandering all that he has saved he goes about requesting to borrow money.
I have talked to this guy on several occasions but he feels I am a pest disturbing his dear life.
As at this moment, the country is encountering very high rate of inflation which stuffs doesn't go fair as before leading him sold his car and being struggling to pay his bills while living in the city and at now, he does not have a place of residence of his own so he jumps from one place to the other passing his night's.
He is now the pest perching on any available places conditionally while inconveniencing others.
He now lives a low key with the best he can afford.
"Had I know" is now a national anthem to him.
I don't find his ignorance to be an excuse and I am thinking of disassociating from him before he gets me affected with his negative possesed energies.
I kind of believe in the title you made, because whatever the result of our lives today is, it is the result of the decision we made before. The lifting of life from the poverty that we started all of that started with the plans that we chose to make decisions.
And that way can be good and bad, depending on what we choose in exchange for the dreams we want to get in life. Although it is not easy to achieve, it takes real hard work, and that is the truth.
I think there are people like this who will always squandered all that they have before looking for ways to earn more money.
People like this don't understand the term 'save for a rainy day' because to them their enjoyment comes first.
The problem is there is no convincing such people, only life can teach them a lesson that's if they will ever learn.
You can only keep advising him as a friend but the rest is up to him to figure out.
People like this don't understand the term 'save for a rainy day' because to them their enjoyment comes first.
The problem is there is no convincing such people, only life can teach them a lesson that's if they will ever learn.
You can only keep advising him as a friend but the rest is up to him to figure out.
I don't find his ignorance to be an excuse and I am thinking of disassociating from him before he gets me affected with his negative possesed energies.
What happened to your friend is typical of every individual who has this mentality of ' you only live once. Spend while you're alive' which is not a bad thing, don't get me wrong but some people don't really understand this phrase and thinks every thing goes.
While others have learnt their lessions of not utilizing their incomes when they had a stable source for their income flows, some others are paying adamants and ignorant to learn from what has happened to others because they feels they are not of the same calling to be affected with what happened to others.
In essence, regret will come after we lose and that is normal for anyone, but we need to learn how other people's experiences should be the best lesson for us. In living our lives we need to have a plan because developing sources of income must be done consistently and precisely. The mistakes we have made must be important lessons for us to change so that in the future we do not repeat the same mistakes.In life some persons just do what pleases them and doesn't tolerate with any piece of advice from anyone at the times they feels to had acquired the heavens on earth. And yet they are not Concious that as the more they grows their incomes for multiplications is also how it could depreciate to a zero value if not utilize productively for continues growth.
Advice is important for consideration when we are in unfavorable conditions and if people advise us then it means they care about us. The greater the responsibility, the greater the expenses we will need, so we need to prepare as early as possible and if we fail to understand the meaning of the preparation strategy, we will be faced with complicated financial problems. Jump to: