Would you quit gambling for a friend? - page 8.

Accardo

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Quote from: acroman08 on February 11, 2024, 03:26:01 AM

Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

if it is just a casual friend that you hang out with from time to time with your other friends, I'd say just stop hanging out with that friend especially if their addiction is ruining the mood every time you hang out with your friends. if it is a very close friend of mine I'd confront them and give them a reality check, tell them that they need to get professional help and let them know the negative effect of their gambling addiction is causing to the people around them.

Addiction from group gambling, can be contagious from one friend to another. So, if a gambler continues playing the game with the addicted person, it could affect the next person. The need to caution the player to stop gambling is also important. Because as a friend, he's meant to be helped. However, he shouldn't be neglected. But moderated. Letting him stay on his own without an attention, will increase his compulsive gambling. And he can establish friendship with different gamblers who are not yet aware of his addiction. A friend should check those possibilities before avoiding another addicted gambler. If the still responsible gambler is capable of mingling with his addicted friend without engaging into gambling with him, which is almost impossible, he should be there for him. Especially when the person doesn't have close family that'll take care of him.

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

So I heard a story of some acquaintances that in their friend group, some person really got addicted recently.
At first it was just fun and game, they would sit together and play some slots together in a big screen with some 10€ or so for as much as this would last them with small stake spins. And this is something they would do on big occasions. Only when together as a group and only for big days like birthday parties etc.

But the thing is, unbeknownst to them, one person in their friend group was really compulsive. So in the course of a few months, he became really addicted. He would spend much of his own money from his salary on slots and sports betting, eventually losing most of it regularly every month. Then on nearly every get together he would ask his friends to chip in so they can play slots this time in his account. Every time asking for more significant amounts too.

This guy hasn't caused any trouble to his friends but it's a worrying situation to see him waste most of his salary every month... So now the other guys were contemplating to quit their poker playing hobby because it was really affecting their friend negatively. And they had a somewhat regular get-together to play poker with very small stakes just for the fun of it. It's a petty that they might have to abandon their poker games but to them it's either that or abandoning their friend and worsening his compulsion.

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

To me I don't think that quitting will help such friend, the best option is to confront this friend though at this point you should be expecting two things since addiction is now involved, is either he refuse to listen to your advice or he listen, another fact to consider is that he may listen but do otherwise later in different location, addiction is something else, I think people should know their addiction level before going into something not only gambling, both alcohol, this things has changed the phase of many people mindset, just imaging he plays with almost everything he got as a salary which might be affecting his immediate family that's if he has, this gambling of a thing is something most of us should be very careful about because addict isn't a joker.

Assface16678

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I don't think that stopping gambling would help the friend; maybe avoiding your friend from seeing you gamble or not inviting your friend who is already addicted to gambling is more effective. Am I willing to quit my own gambling habit? No, instead I will confront my friend about what he is doing wrong and do my best to stop him, to lecture and guide him so that it will wake him up in his bad situation, but if this is not enough, then at least I did my best. It's not my obligation to stop him from gambling; maybe just my conscience. But still, the ones who are responsible for their habits are themselves. If your friend is in a bad state, you could do anything you can to help him, but if that is not enough, let him face his own consequences. Let them feel and learn for themselves what they are doing wrong.

the rise

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it depends on the situation how important the friend is to us, if it's just an ordinary friendship, I don't think there's a need to stop because of force of circumstances, but it's different if our friend is a friend we love and we care about him, it's better to stop because it's for the good, after all this is not about gambling for fun because your friends also become addicts out of habit

Mauser

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

If I see a friend struggling with his emotions during a gambling session I would definitely approach him and talk to him. Good friends should have nothing between them and it's all about helping someone in need. Everybody can feel bad after a big loss and struggle to control himself during a night. Especially when alcohol is involved then things might get worse. The question is if this is just something that happens rarely or something that happenes on a regular basis. In case my friend is losing control and the gambling is affecting his life then I would definitely talk to him and try to make him understand that the current path he is on is not working. The second step would likely be to try and exclude him from the gambling nights. This doesn't mean that things should happen behind is back, but rather make him understand that he needs to take a break from gambling. The most important thing should be for my friend to realise that he is in trouble and that he needs help. It doesn't help much if all the friends try to help him, but he doesn't realise himself what is wrong and will just continue in his old ways. As a good friend I would definitely listen to my friends when they approach me and say that I am gambling too much.

Marvelman

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Interesting story, but not very relatable. That's a rough spot for the friends. I get why some folks wouldn't relate - not all of us have watched a buddy wrestle with addiction. Sure, sitting him down and pushing rehab is one idea. But not every person would feel right stepping up like that.

michellee

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If a friend is addicted to gambling, other friends should try to get him out of gambling. He probably won't realize that he is already addicted to gambling. The task of his friends is to help him stop his gambling activities before it is too late. After all, he is his friend and must be helped immediately before his addiction gets worse.

And it was a good plan to leave gambling just to help his friend who was already suffering from addiction. If they still decide to gamble, we are the ones who have to withdraw from the friendship. We do that so that we don't experience problems in gambling. Moreover, we realize that we do not have good self-control when gambling.

We can also contact his family and tell them that he has become addicted to gambling. We should tell the truth to his family so that they can immediately help him to cure his gambling addiction.

Outhue

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That type of friends are rare, even close friends don't care about a friend addiction, they are not fully aware of themselves and if one become a addicted gambler the rest will probably end up the same way.

The friends should avoid gambling for a while, and the addicted one will slowly give up and follow his friends footstep, some people are like this, they easily copy their friends and few times they overdo it.

Influence is a scary thing in some area, this day where you can like someone for who they are and decide to follow them, for the love you have for them you are ready to change because of them, there are so many humans that are build this way, but I am not one of them, I always believe that I am different and I am not ready to change because I like someone, I respect who they are and I respect myself too.

The friends did the right thing, I could quit gambling if I am one of the friends, since it all began from the group, so they are in power to put an end to their friends addiction.

Yogee

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What's the point of changing your lifestyle now? I think it's already too late if he's gone that far. You can stop showing the friend your gambling activities but it doesn't matter anymore since he could still go to the casino or log in to his online account. There are many places where he could be exposed too like socials media ads and gambling clips.

acroman08

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

if it is just a casual friend that you hang out with from time to time with your other friends, I'd say just stop hanging out with that friend especially if their addiction is ruining the mood every time you hang out with your friends. if it is a very close friend of mine I'd confront them and give them a reality check, tell them that they need to get professional help and let them know the negative effect of their gambling addiction is causing to the people around them.

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

This guy hasn't caused any trouble to his friends but it's a worrying situation to see him waste most of his salary every month... So now the other guys were contemplating to quit their poker playing hobby because it was really affecting their friend negatively. And they had a somewhat regular get-together to play poker with very small stakes just for the fun of it. It's a petty that they might have to abandon their poker games but to them it's either that or abandoning their friend and worsening his compulsion.

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

One of the option is not to include him on your poker playing sessions when you have one, or you will all agreed to tell him straight that he is doing it all wrong, don't just leave the group you all have to do something for a friend if you are all friend to the guy you will be concern on his status its not good that you are all good and one of your friend is addicted to gambling and worse if your other friends become addicted to gambling too your addicted friend could influence your other friend, so its not good if one in your circle has serious addiction to gambling.

You should all do something about it if you want to retain harmonious relationship with friends or you will have to leave each other. Remember birds of the same feather flocks together you should have all one goal and this is just to enjoy poker and not to get involved in gambling and become addicted to it.

Apocollapse

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Never limit yourself because of friends, it's either you need to gamble with other friends except him, looking for new friends or gamble alone. Why you need to sacrifice yourself because of friends, when your friends didn't do same thing for you, you will regret why you need to prioritize him over yourself when he's prioritizing him or his new friends over you.

So I won't quit gambling for a friend.

Gozie51

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

This guy hasn't caused any trouble to his friends but it's a worrying situation to see him waste most of his salary every month... So now the other guys were contemplating to quit their poker playing hobby because it was really affecting their friend negatively. And they had a somewhat regular get-together to play poker with very small stakes just for the fun of it. It's a petty that they might have to abandon their poker games but to them it's either that or abandoning their friend and worsening his compulsion.

Don't we think the friends were also contemplating that they may also be affected negatively like their friends for a game that started for them as fun but has metamorphose into something that the friend can no longer stop himself from doing and betting hugely which is now affecting him.

So I feel some of the friends are not sure of not being addict themselves if they continued playing afterall the friend started by playing for fun, otherwise I don't see a reason they are quitting because of just the friend. If they are confident not to also be affected, they wouldn't have stopped. For example, people don't stop drinking because a friend has stopped it or that a friend vomits anytime he was drunk. Except when you decide by your own conviction.

rodskee

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I am not a regular gambler instead I only gamble for fun and yeah some chance to win so there is no way
that I needed to quit gambling because of anyone as i am a controlled human that will never fall from any bad gambling effect.

Samlucky O

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At first gambling is alway a fun but frequent playing of it will Leed to becoming an addict and you will never know when you are becoming an addict. Sometimes if people tells you that you are an addict, you become naive or angry, not knowing that of a truth you have become one.
What they should do is to call him to Oder, by telling him directly that he has started playing gamble out of point. You know, some people don't know when they are doing wrong untill they are told. And neglecting the fact of telling them is putting them to more risk than ever. Though people might feel that telling them might cause a conflict or misunderstanding, but it should be better telling them than leaving quietly. because if the worst case scenario occurs today, his friends will be asked that what did they do as a friend to rescue their friend from gambling addict? Because as far as I know, friends has a big role to play within the cycle of friends. Except there is no love amongst them. Because the secret of every long lasting friendship is love and caring for each other.

So my point is that when a friend is going astray in gambling, please Call him to oder than letting go off him to his new Faith of becoming a gambling addict.

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I don't think that it's going to happen to me, I have a standard when it comes to how close the people in my life is and when it comes to friends, it's going to be difficult for me to acknowledge them as an inspiration to quit gambling or do something for their sake, sure there's loyalty but there's really no way to test it and it will probably be handy only when there's a benefit from both of you so I don't think that loyalty to your friend would make you do something lifechanging, to be honest I believe that it should be more on the "you should be the one that yearns for a change and not other people" because I believe that when it comes to quitting on something that's bad for you, I believe that it's not a good idea to be influenced by others to change when you're resisting on the inside, the help would become useless at the end of the day.

Don Pedro Dinero

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Well, in my case, assuming the story is true, I might consider it, but the problem I see is that if the friend has already developed compulsive gambling behaviour, the fact that we friends stop playing the poker game is not going to cure him of his problem. He will first have to make a conscious decision and then seek help from a professional to help him out of the hole. If he were already in the process, I would see more sense in helping someone who is in the process of recovery.

Hirose UK

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It depends on them themselves in responding to the gambling activities they carry out, if they don't do it wrongly then failure will not occur and of course they will be able to minimize the incidence of gambling addiction.
But on the other hand, we as friends can still help by providing some suggestions or more appropriate directions for them to remain in safe condition and this will enable them to avoid some bad things that could happen at any time, as friends we can helping is priority.

But if I in condition like that, the steps taken are to hide all gambling activities from all friends and gamble only when I at home or in quiet place, this will not affect anyone regarding the gambling we do.
What more, we gamble in online gambling so it will be easier if we want to be able to gamble anonymously without anyone knowing.

ethereumhunter

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A friend should always be a reminder to other friends. If a friend ends up becoming addicted to gambling, he should be able to remind him to stop his gambling activities at all costs immediately. And together with other friends, we must stop regular meetings just for gambling and replace them with other more useful things, such as exercising. It will shape his mind and can divert his mind from gambling. If they can do it for a few months and never gamble again, they can stay away from gambling, and hopefully, that can be a solution for them.

But if they don't want to stop gambling, I will immediately decide to leave them rather than experience even more serious problems. I don't want to become addicted to gambling, especially if I can't control myself and end up ruining my life. I would rather lose my friends than be destroyed by them, even though I have warned them to stop their gambling activities.

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Quote from: alani123 on February 10, 2024, 07:34:51 PM

Would you do the same for a friend? Me personally I think I would have just confronted such a friend and told them to seek help instead of me altering my lifestyle for his benefit. If they didn't seek help to the point that it was affecting me I would've just stopped hanging out with them silently I think. A friend would've had to be a real good one to make an exception at least.

We all started this together for us to make our get-together more fun and enjoyable, and if it happens that what we take for fun is now affecting one of ours behind our back, the best kind of support we can render to him is to leave the game entirely and encourage him that we can do without the game and he should also do the same.

To go straight to your question: Yes, I can stop my poker game playing, and we can go to other activities that can contribute to our get-together fun.

We are talking about addiction here, and if stopping the game can contribute to him getting himself out of the addiction, why not pick the opportunity? We are all friends after all, and when he is affected, we will also get affected directly or indirectly, especially when this whole addiction gets to the point where he can't keep up with his own personal bills.

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