Topic: Jokes? Gimme your best! - page 8. (Read 26713 times)
Dash
SCENE: My teenage daughter and me in the car.
F : Dad, do you know what the most commonly used letter in a girl’s name is?
Me: Hmm, is it a consonant or a vowel? (Silence.) Please tell me you know what consonants and vowels are.
F : You’re no fun, Dad. Forget it.
Me: What is a vowel?
F : OK, OK. A vowel is … ahh … eh … well, oh … uh …
Me: Close enough.
A:Hello bro, have a job?
B:There, his salary is great
A:What is his job?
B:Teach crocodiles to swim
A: LOL
B:There, his salary is great
A:What is his job?
B:Teach crocodiles to swim
A: LOL
nomad13666.
Heres one.
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
Like that, but the woman and the boy should be dead i think.
The apple, TV and Bomb falls on different locations as the plane moving
the guys dropped them one by one and not on same spot Maybe they turn after each drop and fly over and over again the same spot.
Anywere - this joke has so much logical fails that its even funny again...
Heres one.
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
Like that, but the woman and the boy should be dead i think.
The apple, TV and Bomb falls on different locations as the plane moving
the guys dropped them one by one and not on same spot
I've heard that jokes is seriousness.
Its mean without seriousness we dont understand the joke
Its mean without seriousness we dont understand the joke
Daughter: Mom, I’m pregnant!
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
hahahaha its funny, i am stomatche (too more laugh)
Q: What did the baby digital watch say to the mommy analog watch?
A: "Look Ma, no hands!"
A: "Look Ma, no hands!"
Daughter: Mom, I’m pregnant!
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
mmd
Daughter: Mom, I’m pregnant!
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
Heres one.
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
Like that, but the woman and the boy should be dead i think.
Tiffany Yep sent me a UDP joke, but I didn't get it.
I used to always recommend Intel CPUs but now AMD has Ryzen...
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, in practice there is...
Heres one.
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
3 men are on a plane. They decide to find out what objects fall the fastest.
The first man threw an apple. The second man threw a TV. The third man threw a bomb.
They land the plane to go see how their objects fair. They found a boy crying. They asked why he was crying.
"An apple fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and saw a woman crying. They asked why she was crying.
"A TV fell from the sky and hit me on the head!"
They continued walking and found a girl laughing so hard she could barely breathe. They asked her why she was laughing.
"My grandpa farted and my house blew up!"
Black Lives Matter have a valid point but they need to compromise.
I think 3/5ths is fair.
I think 3/5ths is fair.
A man walks into a library and asks the librarian if they have any books on paranoia.
The librarian says, "They're behind you!"
I like it a lot:
Someon stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay.
You have my Word
Someon stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay.
You have my Word
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