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Topic: What is your state on mind if your son stole your money to gamble? - page 11. (Read 3238 times)

hero member
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It depends on his age and what type of a son he is, some child need scolding while some needs to be sat down and talk to, so it depends on which type of a father you are, as every parents have different ways of handling their children.

It depends on some other facts as well like where are you, how is your society, and many more. Gambling is a common thing in some societies where almost every adult gamble and they do not forbid their grown-up children to gamble. If you talk about my society, he did two offenses at the same time. Stealing is bad regardless of where are you from. But, some parents tolerate it when their kids gamble.

If you talk about my society, gambling, and stealing, both are forbidden and punishable offenses. Gambling is not allowed at all. Let's say I didn't tell my son anything about gambling, but if he gets caught gambling, he will be punished I won't be able to help him. so, it is my responsbility to guide him no matter how.
Totally depends on the parenting since not all would really be that open and not all would really be recommending their children on dealing up with gambling yet we do know that it wont really be able to give out that kind of advantage but rather it would really be that resulting into possible addiction. Just like on the example that once your child did really come into a point that they are already that stealing just to gamble, then this is a solid indication or sign that they are already that addicted to it. They would really be able to do those things which they havent done before. They wont really be able to realize those things when the damage has been done is already that severe.

As a parent then no one would really be happy if your children would really be ending up on stealing on you just because they do love or really that playing on gambling.Of course
you would really be having that kind of disciplinary action. This isnt something that good to be done and should really be stopped and controlled as much as possible.
This is where your parenting rights and authority would be shown.
hero member
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It depends on his age and what type of a son he is, some child need scolding while some needs to be sat down and talk to, so it depends on which type of a father you are, as every parents have different ways of handling their children.

It depends on some other facts as well like where are you, how is your society, and many more. Gambling is a common thing in some societies where almost every adult gamble and they do not forbid their grown-up children to gamble. If you talk about my society, he did two offenses at the same time. Stealing is bad regardless of where are you from. But, some parents tolerate it when their kids gamble.

If you talk about my society, gambling, and stealing, both are forbidden and punishable offenses. Gambling is not allowed at all. Let's say I didn't tell my son anything about gambling, but if he gets caught gambling, he will be punished I won't be able to help him. so, it is my responsbility to guide him no matter how.
full member
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It depends on the situation. If this scenario happened when he's still young and still a minor, I'll definitely blame myself for not being able to look after my child. Stealing is already bad, and to use it for gambling will make it worse. If my child learned or discovered gambling because of me, realization will hit me how bad I am as a parent. But if he's already an adult, I will only scold him for stealing because he already knows what is right or wrong, yet still do it for gambling.

But regardless of the situation, wrong is wrong so lecturing your child what he did wrong and making him understand why is it wrong and he shouldn't do it in the first place is what I'll be doing as a parent.
sr. member
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In the event that I am the mom, and this is the first time my son took money from me to use in gambling, I would control my emotions and not yell at him. I would not show him that I am furious, and I would simply tell him stealing is awful regardless of whether to use it in gambling or not.

Afterward, I will move toward his father and discuss what occurred in private. His father deserves to know the incident and will likewise clear it up for our child of his awful actions. Men are more engaged with gambling than women so his dad should be the one to make the final conversation and give advice.
sr. member
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It depends on his age and what type of a son he is, some child need scolding while some needs to be sat down and talk to, so it depends on which type of a father you are, as every parents have different ways of handling their children.

If he is up to the age it's better to have some discussion with him, maybe he will listen, if you discipline him in another manner he will probably start fearing you and start hiding things from you, better start with talking to him and make him realize the dangers that awaits every gamblers.

Educate them, teach them what you know about gambling and make sure they get used to risking very small amount of money, and the last part is to always keep an eye on such child, know the type of friends they keep, because it's possible that they get to start gambling through the friends they are keeping.
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Not just education alone, we need to sit them down once in a while and advise them of life's activity be it good or bad, we must let them know what it is. Because If such children finds out about gambling on their own when they haven't reached the required age for gambling, they'll definitely keep it away from you. And doing that is dangerous because it might lead to addiction at a tender age. So there are time were we must show fatherly love by bringing them closers to ourselves and make them trust us by giving them concrete advise in a soft tune and mood, for better understanding.
Yes, they need to be educated and advised about good and bad. Monitoring them must be carried out continuously because today's times are different from several years ago. At least we can explain to them why they shouldn't gamble and tell them the impact if they are already familiar with gambling. They can steal again to be able to have money to use for gambling and that is not good for their age because it can carry over into adulthood. They still have many useful activities and there is no need to approach gambling even after they grow up because we have shown the bad effects it can have on them. They also don't mind if they don't gamble because they can do other activities that can positively impact their lives.

Perhaps, it was the responsibility of the (good) parents to correct mistakes committed by their kids and guide them to the right path. Tolerating their wrongdoings is just like allowing them to do it again (and again) until it reaches the point that they can no longer be changed. While at their early stage, they will know what is wrong and what is right. And the things it exchanges when they commit the wrong one.

Punishment is not a wrong way of disciplining our kids instead, I consider this an effective way to correct and educate someone IMO.
Yes, I agree that parents must punish their children who have made mistakes to show they are wrong and correct what is not right. That's so they can know what's good and bad so they don't repeat it. As parents, we also need to give them responsibility and teaching them about managing their finances is recommended so they can use the money we give them well. We also need to pay attention to them even though we are busy working so they can see that we care about them and don't want to make them feel alone.

By always supervising what they do and advising them, they can know what they can and cannot do, especially for their age. They can also learn a lot from their parents so that they have something that can keep them from making mistakes. And making mistakes is normal but they also have to know how to correct them.
hero member
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On the other hand, his son's behavior really shocked his heart because his son dared to steal money. Of course it would be a bad character to let him just like that, but who wouldn't be complacent if his son managed to return the money he stole as a result of a big win, anyone would forgive him. and generous, but I personally would discipline the child more in a gentle way so that he doesn't go too far
We do know that stealing is never been good no matter how small or big it would be but still its stealing on which it is really just that right that we should really be disciplining them while its still early
so that they wont really be having that kind of bad behavior or doings while they are still you or simply cut it off while you do have the right on parenting them because once your kids or children
do get involved into something or once they are that free then there's no way for us to monitor or to control them. This is why parenting would really be having that huge impact on how
they would really become if we do speak about being a person and into its behaviors. Regarding into the situation then i would definitely be scolding my son on this one
even if it turns out that he had been able to win up some money.
legendary
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If I am considering the parent at this situation then I have no concerns regarding my son involved in gambling as long as he is adult but I am not going to fund him for his entertainment, he needs to make money then only he knows the importance of money and how to spend then responsibly. I see this son could be a minor so giving a warning probably make things better, pushing them too hard and humiliating in front of others will make it worse.

True,  a better communication will help to guide the child, you always have that responsibility as a parent and with your good guidance they will be able to understand what might be the possible risk if they continue doing things like this to finance their gambling,  for now, they might be doing it inside your house but what if there's nothing that they can get the chance of doing it outside may take place and that's will make it worse.

Though you are right in terms of doing punishment,  humiliating them will not help them but it can develop more bad impressions to their young minds, instead of listening they might push for more leading you to a more complicated situation and putting you to more potential problems to arise.
sr. member
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On the other hand, his son's behavior really shocked his heart because his son dared to steal money. Of course it would be a bad character to let him just like that, but who wouldn't be complacent if his son managed to return the money he stole as a result of a big win, anyone would forgive him. and generous, but I personally would discipline the child more in a gentle way so that he doesn't go too far
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If I am considering the parent at this situation then I have no concerns regarding my son involved in gambling as long as he is adult but I am not going to fund him for his entertainment, he needs to make money then only he knows the importance of money and how to spend then responsibly. I see this son could be a minor so giving a warning probably make things better, pushing them too hard and humiliating in front of others will make it worse.
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The thing is the kid gives back the money he stole with an interest.  The thing here is returning the money.  As a parent, a simple theft can be forgiven, and forgiving does not condone the action but rather giving the kids another chance, plus the fact that the kid returned the money means he knows his mistakes and wants to correct them by returning the money.


If the kid won the money from the gambling site,he will return your money with the interest.But if he had loss the money in the gambling site,it will cause him to hide their loss to you.They also don’t let you know their stealing money,the parents should take responsibility and give their children some pocket money to avoid of such stealing in the gambling site.


So what do you want to do with the kid? jail them or beat them up because they stole a small amount of your money?  I think that is a harsh thing to do as a parent.  Reminding/scolding them that stealing is not a good act is enough.  Besides, if you beat up your kid as a parent, you will be charged with child abuse, and that makes the scenario worse.


Such violence should not be done against the small kid,instead you can teach them their mistake.Because the mistake was made by the less knowledge of it was a mistake at the younger age.The parents should take responsibility to teach him at the younger age to avoid of the repetition in the future.Because the kids will make this as habit,if you fail to point his mistake at the young age.
hero member
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Question: would she be so disheartened and mad as this if the son had won the bet on a multi million price?
Dear fellows, let's assume you are the mom, what would be your state of mind on this context?

I will not praise him for what he did but I will not scold him either since the outcome will benefits our life. This is the type of mistakes that you will let go easily since the benefits overcome the intensity of the son sin.

There’s nothing to do on what he is done but you have a choice to waste your time on being angry to a positive outcome or just be happy for the success of your son by doing some risk on his side and manage to win significant amount. We are all risking in our life even when getting job since we pay for requirements before we can start working. I will consider this mistake as an investment rather than stolen funds since the outcome is good.
legendary
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My friends aunty called him on the call while we were conversing today, and  she was complaining about how her son has withdrawn #20,000 approximately $15 from her account through mobile transfer to play bet and he lost it all.
She complained bitterly and pitifully because she struggled to safe such amount of money.
Any loss is upsetting. No wonder auntie is worried about this money.

Now, the mum is calling on everyone she could to intervene, discipline the child and force him to provide the money in any means he can without the concern of how he could refund the money.
That's right, let him work off the money! Let him learn to appreciate and treasure money! Smiley

Question: would she be so disheartened and mad as this if the son had won the bet on a multi million price?
But this is a very interesting question. I am sure that she would have laid claim to a multimillion-money sum, since the bet was made on her money. That is, in case of failure, all risks and losses fall on her son, and in case of success, she takes all the profit.

Dear fellows, let's assume you are the mom, what would be your state of mind on this context?
What type of mom? Smiley Gambling Mom or Anti-Gambling Mom? Each case will have a different answer.
hero member
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They are just children, or minors, and they aren't matured enough. If they make mistakes like stealing, then maybe we should also reflect a bit if we do our job as parents to guide them, because children will not steal if they know in the first place that stealing is bad and they'll be punish. It's very challenging nowadays since children can get information online, can talk to people they don't know online, and sometimes we can't see everything they are doing.

Come to Asian countries and our parents will teach you how to handle your kids. Sometimes these gentle things destroy kids' lives. Asian parents used to beat their children for such mistakes. I don't think it's too bad to guide your kids in a hard way. Especially when it comes to stealing and gambling (two offenses at the same time).

Look, if your kid has stolen money to buy chocolate or a toy, then it's okay to guide him gently by saying it's a bad thing to do. But when your children steal money to gamble, that means he has grown enough to understand gambling and they deserve to be punished in hard way.
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First of all, stealing is stealing and there is no justification to what the boy did but in the case of assuming that he miraculously won millions of dollars, we all would agree that the mum would definitely be happy but the probability of the boy winning that money is small so stealing that money is definitely going to get him punished and that's my own opinion as I don't know what others will do.

Just a case study, imagine if the boy was not caught I believe he would have stolen another one again or if the money he stole he took from someone else other than his mum then the punishment will be more so there is no justification to the fact that he actually stole the money.
I'd he had not won the game he played with the stolen money, I'm very sure he by now wouldn't be celebrating or telling the story of how he won a bet rather it would be that he's an irresponsible gambler, an addict and several other names would have been used on him by now but then he's been appraised because he was lucky to have won.

Please to others who will be seeing this and this it's just fine to steal and gamble and when you win you can replace, such idea is very wrong and shouldn't be encouraged at all, I don't support or encourage such at all, it's never a good way to gamble, that's pure desperation and it will do more harm than good to whosoever is been affected, so it's much better to use your own guns or if you don't have stay away from gambling then and face something else because gambling with such money can get you into problem.
Had luck not been on his side, he would have been labeled irresponsible and addicted. Isnt it strange that outcomes determine morality?

I agree about gambling with stolen money. Glorifying such behaviors can dangerously warp perceptions, especially for the impressionable. Not simply legality, but ethics and principle. Gambling should be fun, not a frantic getaway or a way to right wrongs.

I confess, gaming is irresistible when done responsibly and for fun. Luck and strategy are tested in this adrenaline rush. But, and this is a huge but, it should be pursued independently within fun and financial safety. You should enjoy the game, not be desperate.
hero member
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Not just education alone, we need to sit them down once in a while and advise them of life's activity be it good or bad, we must let them know what it is. Because If such children finds out about gambling on their own when they haven't reached the required age for gambling, they'll definitely keep it away from you. And doing that is dangerous because it might lead to addiction at a tender age. So there are time were we must show fatherly love by bringing them closers to ourselves and make them trust us by giving them concrete advise in a soft tune and mood, for better understanding.
What you said is correct, it is very important for us to be able to advise our children if they dare to take money without telling them first and they use the money they take for gambling, of course this is not very good and we must advise them well and don't let them not listen and they end up repeating the mistake again, I am sure that if we can give good advice the child will be able to understand it and will not repeat the mistake they have made.
They are just children, or minors, and they aren't matured enough. If they make mistakes like stealing, then maybe we should also reflect a bit if we do our job as parents to guide them, because children will not steal if they know in the first place that stealing is bad and they'll be punish. It's very challenging nowadays since children can get information online, can talk to people they don't know online, and sometimes we can't see everything they are doing.

The approach here should be gentle, we sohuld discipline them by educating them, and tell them that gambling is onyl for 18+ years old.
hero member
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I'm not a parent yet, but if I ever have a child, I won't let him not learn while growing up, I can't just let him forgive immediately if he does something wrong especially that stealing thing because maybe until he grows up, he'll carry that kind of attitude with him because he thought that is correct. While they are young, they need to be scolded, reprimanded and taught the right things. We can't spoil a child if they done wrong. They need to learn in the most right way.
As parents, we must be able to provide a good education for them, especially in the future; everything will change and will not be the same as what we experienced when we were little. We need to learn ways to adapt to their development so that children can accept it because today's children are smarter than children a few years ago. We can scold and reprimand our children if they make mistakes because we don't want our children to grow up on the wrong path. Children need to know and be able to differentiate between right and wrong so they don't fall into the wrong path.
Perhaps, it was the responsibility of the (good) parents to correct mistakes committed by their kids and guide them to the right path. Tolerating their wrongdoings is just like allowing them to do it again (and again) until it reaches the point that they can no longer be changed. While at their early stage, they will know what is wrong and what is right. And the things it exchanges when they commit the wrong one.

Punishment is not a wrong way of disciplining our kids instead, I consider this an effective way to correct and educate someone IMO.
sr. member
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As parents, we must be able to provide a good education for them, especially in the future; everything will change and will not be the same as what we experienced when we were little. We need to learn ways to adapt to their development so that children can accept it because today's children are smarter than children a few years ago. We can scold and reprimand our children if they make mistakes because we don't want our children to grow up on the wrong path. Children need to know and be able to differentiate between right and wrong so they don't fall into the wrong path.

Not just education alone, we need to sit them down once in a while and advise them of life's activity be it good or bad, we must let them know what it is. Because If such children finds out about gambling on their own when they haven't reached the required age for gambling, they'll definitely keep it away from you. And doing that is dangerous because it might lead to addiction at a tender age. So there are time were we must show fatherly love by bringing them closers to ourselves and make them trust us by giving them concrete advise in a soft tune and mood, for better understanding.
hero member
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I'm not a parent yet, but if I ever have a child, I won't let him not learn while growing up, I can't just let him forgive immediately if he does something wrong especially that stealing thing because maybe until he grows up, he'll carry that kind of attitude with him because he thought that is correct. While they are young, they need to be scolded, reprimanded and taught the right things. We can't spoil a child if they done wrong. They need to learn in the most right way.
As parents, we must be able to provide a good education for them, especially in the future; everything will change and will not be the same as what we experienced when we were little. We need to learn ways to adapt to their development so that children can accept it because today's children are smarter than children a few years ago. We can scold and reprimand our children if they make mistakes because we don't want our children to grow up on the wrong path. Children need to know and be able to differentiate between right and wrong so they don't fall into the wrong path.
legendary
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It is a human nature to let go of a simple error if the result outweighs the error a million times.  Obviously, the reason why the mother gets angry is because the son stole the money and lost it to gambling.  In your given question, since the kid can give back the stolen money with interest,  I am sure even stranger will forgive the kid and will receive the money with a smile.  Probably that stranger can even hug the kid that gives back the money with huge interest.  What more if you are the mother, for sure the kid will probably give you the whole winning amount.  So is there a reason to get angry in such a situation that you asked?
It depends on the parent's perspective. Perhaps you believe that stealing money is a forgivable offense, or you are the type of parent who is quick to forgive their child for such a mistake.

The thing is the kid gives back the money he stole with an interest.  The thing here is returning the money.  As a parent, a simple theft can be forgiven, and forgiving does not condone the action but rather giving the kids another chance, plus the fact that the kid returned the money means he knows his mistakes and wants to correct them by returning the money.

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However, it is not good to easily forgive a child for stealing money at a young age because it may lead them to believe that it is acceptable to do it again in the future, as they can easily avoid facing the consequences.

So what do you want to do with the kid? jail them or beat them up because they stole a small amount of your money?  I think that is a harsh thing to do as a parent.  Reminding/scolding them that stealing is not a good act is enough.  Besides, if you beat up your kid as a parent, you will be charged with child abuse, and that makes the scenario worse.

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