Topic: Who should quit, and why? - page 17. (Read 2656 times)

Every parent will certainly set themselves as an example for their children, so it would be better for them to set a good example for their children about good things, if they as parents carry out bad habits it will certainly make their children imitate those things of course. We as parents will not want this, so it would be more important to eliminate these habits so that their children do not copy the bad habits of their parents.
Raising our own children will certainly make us know more about our development so it would be better to stop gambling and take care of the family we have because this is a responsibility for both husband and wife.

Correct. Reducing could just end up worse. Or, maybe switching to sports gambling will be an optional course. That way a gambler won't be continually betting unlike how it is with casino games.
I've seen a friend who got addicted to slots and while it is our rest to drink beers and talk about life, he is just in the corner not talking at all, just playing his game on his smartphone. It's sad to see people ending up like that and we tried to make him pause but it doesn't work.
What more if both parents are doing this? I think it will become a family that doesn't even talk about their lives anymore because they are too inclined with their gambling habits. They may not be gambling addicts but still, it could ruin a family because there's no more focus on how a family should be. Even the kids might get affected by this kind of environment. It is not healthy.

Yes, it's true that when it comes to the western world, the duty in the family is been shared 50/50 among both parties, but yet that still doesn't disprove the fact that out out every 100 families, we can not argue the fact that women does the major domestic jobs, and probably take care of the children at home, both in the Eastern, Southern and Northern regions, which is a more reason why women should give up gambling to men in this scenario of yours, because according to the creation story in the Bible, we are meant to understand that women are meant to support and not act as the sole bread winner of the family when the man is still vibrant and active.

(i.e women does the work of a supporter).


Yes, inasmuch as a woman trying to assist is still an involvement in gambling, but yet it still can't be compared with when she comes into gambling full time, as by assisting, she is likely to have more time to take care of the children and other domestic or work related stuff.

in this scenario it makes more sense than what the OP said, the husband and wife are gambling, but looking at the OP story, it seems like the husband and wife dont have children yet, so they spend their time as they please just gambling and this will have a bad impact in the long term and is completely me supports your argument about it being better to immediately become a parent for your children, which means it is better to stop gambling and start planning to build a harmonious household with small children in the house so that fun or happiness will come from your children, not from gambling anymore.

I realize that maybe the husband and wife who gamble spend a lot of money on gambling, they only keep themselves busy looking for fun so they just need something else that can give them other happiness to stop gambling activities and the presence of children in the family will be able to change everything but all that It depends on a husband mindset whether he has a goal of living with his partner happily together without gambling and if the husband realizes this he will start to stop gambling and force his wife to stop immediately and plan future goals to build a more dynamic household and thinking about her child's future.

whatever happens if a couple gambles, it seems like it will be very difficult if the wife has to start early because the husband is the head of the household so whatever happens it is the husband who must be able to set the best example for his family.

When it reaches the point where the husband and wife are actively gambling, it will have a huge negative effect on the family. Households no longer have balance, family finances begin to shrink and children begin to lack attention and affection from their parents. The gambling habit of a husband/wife is the beginning of the destruction of a family, their selfishness can cause their children to become depressed and their intelligence level begins to be hampered. They have to set restrictions on gambling simultaneously in order to maintain family finances and have more time with their children.

You are right that everything depends on the man as the husband who is also the head of the family and is clearly responsible for managing all forms of finances as well as providing education and direction to all family members consisting of wife and children.
But in this case, it is about husband and wife who both like to gamble, so the solution being fully placed on the husband alone will not be able to resolve it and will only cause disputes.
But your last sentence is indeed true and they both must be able to start reducing the intensity of their respective gambling slowly so that in the future there will be changes for the better and they can become family that is protected from all the bad effects of gambling.
Occasionally for fun it fine, but if both of them really gamble often then it could cause serious problems in the future.

Everything starts with joint action which will result in easier success in eliminating gambling activities for each of them.

Case-to-case basis. The answer depends on how responsible they are even while being both gamblers.

Case A: If they are gambling for long but outside gambling, they do their responsibilities properly, I don't see any reason why should they quit.

Case B: Let's say they are worse to the point that now reaching a financial crisis because of gambling, someone or somebody should step into these families and help them. The reason why they should be helped by others is, these gamblers won't stop doing gambling as they are now fall on the gambling trap.

They should run a monthly contest, whoever is less profitable must quit.
But seriously, are we talking about some gambling addiction here? If excessive gambling is disrupting their lives, both should quit obviously. It's unlikely any of them is making a profit, so it's just ruining a family for the chase of dopamine — a deplorable picture.

It's better for them, husband and wife because if they were parents, they would definitely be busier with their children. By stopping gambling, they will have more time to take care of their children, and that is not only a job for the wife but also a job for the husband. Even though her husband works, it is not a problem because the children are their children to whom their parents must give attention. By stopping gambling, this will give them the awareness that taking care of children is much more valuable than just gambling. It's not a matter of who should stop but rather responsibility, and that lies with the husband and wife and not just one of them.

I believe that there are different sets of gamblers inside the gambling world, if the both couples are not an addicted gamblers they and they gamble ones in a month or twice in a whole month that means they should continue like that.
But if the both of them are active gamblers that are well addicted to gamble that means the both of them should stop gambling if only they can not control their gambling habits or nature.
Although, the woman should not gamble as her husband is already a gambler, why I said this is because a day might come when the woman might use money for bills to gamble (and you know what will be the end of it), and still, gamblers easily get addicted to gamble mostly when he or she is also with another gambler, but a gambler might control the love of gamble that he or she have when he's with someone who is not or doesn't like gamblers

People that have a compulsion or have form a habit should probably take a step back. The saying "everything in moderation" should apply to all parts of your life, especially with the vices. It can become a very expensive habit very quickly and depending on your game it can be devastating. If you are playing a game which is weighted against you, like most casino games, then the longer you play the more detrimental it will be to your finances and you may end up chasing them in a downward spiral for a long time. Better to abstain from it entirely if you wish to quit, rather than trying to reduce.

At first, this situation should be what both couples should have discussed before getting married. It is alright they both gambled responsibly and should also be ready to give it up when children starts coming.

I would prefer that the woman quits gambling because she spends much time with the kids and to cut down cost in gambling budget. The both of them can not do that at the same time even if they both depend on gambling wins to survive, it is risky because out of desperation, one of them or both of them can end up using funds meant for house up keep when it gets to that point. 

As a matter of fact, it is ideal that both couples quit when they start parenting. They both could draft out a quit plan for themselves which they could gradually hid to. Since they are two, the plan could be effective because they both would need each other as a reminder and that consciousness would be there that the are quitting gambling as a result of their family.

If that is the case, then both of them should quit.

Parents have the natural obligation of supporting their family financially. If they cannot fulfill this natural obligation to the point that it impairs their livelihood and financials, then both of them should not have married in the first place. They have now the responsibility of having all the necessary financials as security in the event of an emergency. If their gambling addiction/habits affect their relationship with their family, then this will pose a potential problem for them in the future.

In conclusion, both of them should avoid gambling for the betterment of their financials. But, if they can allocate a certain budget for this habit to the point that it is the money that they can lose and they have the extra money for emergency purposes, then they can continue such habit provided that it should not be destructive to the family's expenses.

The truth is that gambling is an activity that is not recommended, no matter if you come with the intention of seeking entertainment because something always cannot be fully predicted, I mean some people have become victims that involvement just for entertainment does not always rule out the possibility that you will also end up badly like people who are already addicted or you will end up in the same position as them. And if we have to choose between the husband or the wife who should quit first then your statement is quite reasonable, a wife has a fairly important role in terms of managing the budget for the cost of home needs that are provided by the husband from the results of the work that produces.

And obviously if a wife does not immediately stop then the possibility for things that are not wanted is very likely to happen, the fear is that she could use most of the budget provided by her husband to be allocated to gambling as you have said above and that is possible, and another thing is in terms of good communication that is really needed so that everything can run in balance, especially in the allocation of the budget between gambling and needs, do not be one-sided in the sense that they are more concerned with gambling, awareness must really be emphasized.

If they gamble in a proper way, I think they can both take some time to gamble by taking terms. One can gamble for X period of time and another can gamble for Y period of time. So no one is left behind and they can both enjoy gambling while also maintaining family matters or other kinds of stuff. But if they have come to a term where they think that continuing the gambling habit might hurt their relation and one of them decides to quit gambling for that sake, they should do it. But doing it forcefully will lead to many problems.

It has to be that person's own individual choice to quit gambling. Or they can both quit gambling in order to support each other.

If they are rich it's okay for them to gamble as long as they are on the point that they consider gambling as an entertainment only.

However, if they are both struggling financially and yet they are still gambling, most likely the family will be affected, and guess what, their kids will likely become gamblers when they grow up as that's what they see as they are growing up. What the parents are doing is a big influence of the children as they grow up.

I believe this kind of scenario is not new, I mean in less developed countries, we can see a lot of families like that, they gamble even if they have financial problems, and it's one of the reasons why poverty has increase. Even in our country, there's this government aid for the poor which they'll receive monthly, and instead of people are being help, it makes them more lazy as they are just relying on it and even use it in gambling.

If there's one who should quit then for me it's the wife since often she is the one managing the finances. Therefore if the wife is a gambler, she might get tempted to spend their household budget into gambling (but this still depends on the level of her gambling activity). On the other side, if both gamble just to have fun, I don't think one should quit to give way for the other. Communication and understanding each other are the key so that they still prioritize their family in general. And just gamble during free time using a money meant for their leisure.

You've got a very complicated scenario, to be honest as I seldom see husband and wife gambles. With this scenario, I think their children are not well taken care of as their time is focused on gambling.

If one should quit, it should be the wife so she could take care of their household, besides a woman who gambles a lot is not common and considered immoral in our country, don't know in your place but here in our place, a woman gambler is tag as irresponsible and not a wife material.

This is a problem that could really be just only be solved out by theirs on which if they are really that dealing with gambling and find out themselves that getting addicted already then they are really that putting their marriage on danger or simply they would really be messing up with their family relationship specially into their child. We do know that when it comes to gambling dealing then it would really be always pertaining
about money spending and with spending then we do know that it would really be ending up on making use of those funds which arent supposed to be used in gambling. You are really just that basically putting up
your own family in danger.The worst thing is that you both husband and wife do really make the same thing.

If it turns out that  you do both gamble but dont able to forget on the responsibilities that you do have in your family then it should be fine but it would be always best
that there should really be a quality time in between members because family wont really be something be called to be loving and caring if they are really that
doing something solo with their own or simply having no harmony.

It's important to consider the well-being of the entire family when it comes to gambling addiction. It's not fair for only one person to quit while the other continues to gamble. Both parties should leave gambling behind in order to maintain fairness and prevent any further harm to the family, especially the children. It's not an easy habit to break, and the temptation to gamble again can be high if one person continues to do so. It's best to work together to overcome the addiction and create a healthier, happier environment for everyone involved.