Topic: Who should quit, and why? - page 18. (Read 2656 times)

This has nothing good to bear when both parents involved in gambling. In this situation, I think this depends on how the two deals with gambling and their financial status. For poor and less fortunate couples, I think it is reasonable to quit as the family's financial needs might be compromised.

Propose a solution to this case, such as tossing a coin to choose a job. If they understand gambling, they should also accept that game and their life together according to their life rules.

But I haven't really encountered this situation in real life where a pair of teams can sustain this field. But there will also be many ways to share difficulties in family life, and both may also need to rebalance and pay attention to their existing lives together.

Gambling can appear in many stories that I find very interesting, but in the end, if it gets too unbalanced, it will destroy our lives.

wow this is getting more interesting I love this perspective of yours  but before I build on it I'll like to correct the perception of men now still having that mentality of women being house keepers and care givers of the children of the home only, in today's world the man can always come in, like in modern society it's like a 50-50 responsibility of the home-care between the man and woman. 

Now on the gambling side, I'll have agreed with you to an extent that the woman should quit for the man because both aren't working for the time being but if she's the one very good at it with a creative analytical knowledge on the activity why not she just continue and the husband who's less good quit for her, rather than she now assisting him to analyze games before he plays them. Isn't it as same thing as both of them gambling still?

Initially, women are created to be home builders, pillars of the family and the people meant to take care of the basic domestic work & children at home, and as such, it will be very bad for someone who is meant to be a builder, pillar and carer of the family to little or no chance for the family due to gambling. This scenario is far different from if had both parties been employed whereby the wife's salary is 3 times the salary of her husband's, the you asked who should resign, then everybody would have said let the husband resigned, since the wife earns more than 3 times his salary. But in this case where both are mere gamblers, it's nice if the wife gives up. (But if she is a very good sport betting analyst, then she could be analysing games for his husband).

Before I even say anything, this gambling thing in the family reminds me of someone, he loves his wife but she is a gambler who is addicted to gambling, and she became a huge burden for him because she almost make them go broke for live, I think it's bad if both husband and wife are into gambling.

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Who is going to protect one from getting addicted? Anyways, I hope they are just small time gambler who have things that they are doing in life? I don't like the sound of it but what can I do? My advice is they should not rely in gambling for any reason, if they plan for a better days they shouldn't try to get it from gambling, and they should both stick to a certain amount for gambling only.

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Responsibility is the first target for every responsible family man, they should expect less from gambling and think about their children and the family they have, happiness is the biggest gift of life, don't trade it with gambling addiction, to avoid the family going separate at the end of the day, they should be very careful with gambling.

I think this issue is quite challenging. The best approach is for the couple to sit down and talk, and both should agree to stop gambling. If one of them continues, it will be difficult for the other to accept quitting when they see the partner still engaged in gambling every day. The question is whether the gambling addiction has taken such a toll that the spouse is truly ready to give it up.

Another solution could be for both to allocate a small amount of time on weekends to gamble together as a recreational activity, satisfying both of their passions. This way, it won't affect family responsibilities or child care. I find it challenging to impose a unilateral decision for one of them to quit in this situation.

In my personal opinion, it's yourself or the man's side. The husband is the leader of the family, and he is obliged to set an example with good decisions. Husbands have a big responsibility in managing and guiding their wife's children in a better direction, such as managing finances and other important matters. However, it would be good if they both started to reduce the intensity of their gambling.

This may not be entirely true, if the couple is engaged in gambling, they may have experiences but we cannot say they are very experienced in gambling in a way that they can manage themselves and is able to make gambling as source of income.  The couple might be engaging in gambling not for a source of income but rather it is their vice for entertainment.



I agree, as long as the couple does not experience any negative thing from gambling and they are able to meet their need, there is no reason for one of them to quit.  And if ever gambling gives them negative effect, why not both of them quit gambling? I think it is the better solution than only one quitting gambling.  If one quit and the other stay in gambling I think it will make no difference because sooner or later the one who quit will think that it is unfair and eventually rejoin his partner in gambling engagement.

There's no gambler that'll proudly say that he's never had bad days in gambling whereby he ends up losing a lot of money after trying to recover his initial losses and that's why it's absolutely unwise for a couple to engage in gambling because they might end up losing all the money that was supposed to sustain the family in gambling. Again if a couple engage in gambling, it'll be very difficult for them to control their gambling activities in front of their kids and as we all know, gambling in front of kids is absolutely unwise as it'll increase the chances of making the kids gambling addicts in the future.

If two individuals of opposite gender decides to come together and become couples, there are some personal initial engagements they'll have to sacrifice to make the marriage work and if the both of them engages in gambling, then they'll have quit in other to raise a happy good home for themselves and more importantly for their kids.

If both of them have an understanding of the risk involved in gambling and having the understanding of how gambling can ruin their life and can manage all that risk,  then I don't think there be anything wrong and no one needs to quit form the other if their both can properly manage their gambling involvement and activities and not allow it to interfere with their marital responsibilities and demands,  it then ok for both to continue with their gambling activities.

But in as much as we encourage such,  if at any point the spouses discover the overbearing pressure of their gambling activities on them,  it then advises that both should resign from gambling at the same time and look out for some other recreational activities that can help them better. The

I know a case where a married couple bets on sports on boxing and football, but they only bet on their favorite team.For them, this is just another way of relaxation or even a hobbyThey are not gambling people and they have no problems with bets. With the situation as indicated I haven’t encountered it in the starting post yet, but one thing is for sure. If games take up most of your time and finances, you need to stop, as it will only get worse.

If both husband and wife gamble in the same family, it means that they are very experienced in gambling and for them gambling is an alternative source of income. If those family members feel that gambling will not have any bad effect on their child then why would they give up gambling. Or if they think that gambling may have bad effects on their children during childhood, they do not need to give up gambling because they will not discuss gambling in front of children and they will be careful not to influence gambling on their children. If the parents are careful and manage their activities well then I don't think it will have any effect on the child of that family. Hopefully the gambling will not have a bad effect on the child when he learns to understand

In such a situation, I think different and fair solutions can be applied rather than focusing on the solution of a single person quitting gambling. For example;

Both husband and wife can simultaneously stop gambling. In this way, equality will be achieved between both individuals and the budget used by both individuals for gambling will be included in the family budget and will contribute to the family budget.

As a second suggestion, I can recommend that both individuals take turns for gambling. Both the husband and the wife can continue to gamble regularly within a certain period of time with taking turns. In this way, it will be ensured that each individual gambles less and an equality will be created as in my previous suggestion.

The third and final suggestion I can make is to divide the budget that this couple can afford for gambling into two and resolve it so that both the husband and the wife gamble. For example, let's say this couple has a budget of 1,000 units available for gambling each month. This budget can be divided between 500-500 between two people, instead of being consumed by a single individual so that both individuals can gamble.

I think that by using such solution methods as I have mentioned, it can be ensured that both individuals gamble equally and fairly and that both individuals can reach a solution without giving up gambling.

It gets easier to quit when you not really been enmeshed into gambling that deep and your addiction level is at the surface level otherwise quiting gambling or any other kind of addictive practices it doesn't just happen overnight, it takes a rigorous and conscious gradually processes to eventually leave totally.

On the other hand, when it involves a husband and wife in the gambling of a thing the situation is very technical to handle even as it's not bad that both spouse gamble, no matter how the struggle to maintain responsible gambling practices there will still be key areas of the family life their gambling life will affect the family negatively which won't happen to be so if it's just one of them that's into gamble. That's why I feel one should quit but who will it be is just the hard nut to crack here.

It seems that cases like this are quite rare but there must be some out there. You are the head of the family and that means you have the power for every decision you want to make especially in your family relationship, a good decision but not that easy, your wife can reject the decision of you telling her to stop right? it is possible, especially if your wife is already involved with a high level of gambling or almost touching addiction. And the other thing is that it could be that your wife turns all the decisions over to you, or I mean she also wants you to quit the gambling activity, limiting is good but I think it's better if you can agree to quit together, but on the other hand it all depends on you and your wife especially in terms of approach in solving the problem.

I don't think there is a better choice between who should quit in a case like this than both quitting at the same time. The husband acts as a breadwinner and with his gambling habit it could be that the family experiences a decline in the economy or means a lack of money to meet needs, and if the husband stops and his wife does not then another possibility is that the money given by the husband for the needs of the kitchen and his children could be diverted to gambling by his wife.

This is a tie, I mean both of them are in this mess together as a couple and whatever they are doing about it, they must do it together, else the marriage is even at risk. Peradventure one of them quits the gambling for the other, the quitting partner might start seeing the other person a wasteful, unserious and irresponsible partner considering the level of addiction they might have reached earlier. They need each other's support in sanitizing their home and remember that these kids copy everything they see their parents doing very fast. From my own point of view, they cannot support themselves properly if only one party quits and the other continues. The best way is for the couple to quit out rightly in the interest of the family while they support each other positively in the journey of their rehabilitation. it is not an easy decision, but in my opinion, its probably the best decision for the sanity of the family.

You sounds like gambling is bad for someone who's already married especially if they already have a child. If you worried your child might become a gambler before he reach 18 years old, you must avoid to gamble in front your kids.

What about this one: Do you completely stop having sex with your wife after your is kids born? I believe the answer is no, but you did it when your kids is sleeping/away and you avoid to discuss about sex in front your kids.

Previously, I had never encountered a husband and wife who actively gambled. If this incident happened to my family or relatives, I would ask the wife to stop gambling. The reason is of course to have more time to take care of the house and children. Husbands must also be able to limit gambling activities by leaving time to earn a living to meet family needs. Being active in gambling places is fine, but there are other responsibilities that need to be taken into account, if husband and wife always spend time gambling, then who will take care of their children.

That's a tricky situation. There can be justification that both of them are responsible gamblers and parents and they are not neglecting their duties to their kids. But at the same time, if you're going to realize that they're in a bad situation if it's going to affect their parenthood and the kids will see that they're gamblers, I think that's the time that they need to adjust. But are they going to continue while the kids won't ask questions related to gambling because they can see that their parents are gambling? I don't know, I am not yet in that situation so for me only time can tell how they're going to adjust to the situation.

Being a parent with a lot of obligations needs to weigh a lot of things and people might say that they're not earning with gambling. Let's get real guys there are people who truly see gambling as a source of income and they are united on it because they both know the ins and outs of it. They won't get married not knowing that they're gambling or probably they even met because of a casino or both of them is their hobby. Proper communication should be done on this part, maybe a give and take for both of them. Today, the guy can gamble and tomorrow it's the wife. Something like that and I believe that things like this can be sort with any possible good solution.

I think this has never been discussed in this forum, if I were a husband who had a wife who gambled maybe I would stop gambling for the sake of the child because I know that my wife will definitely follow me in the end, after all why have the same habit when Gambling is actually not the only way to find entertainment, women can get lots of entertainment, for example going to the salon or shopping instead of gambling.

Personally, I probably wouldn't be looking for a wife who is a gambler because that wouldn't be good for me and my child. The point is, if my wife and I still want to gamble, make sure we don't pay attention to our children at all and never show them gambling. and bad habits towards children, but if that can't be done, it's best to start from yourself. the fact is that my wife is not a gambler but she is good at managing all my gambling budgets.