Does it looks responsible as woman telling husband you gamble? - page 12.

bettercrypto

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
Not chasing profit after lost
Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
Not gambling with all my income or salaries
Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

I don't see anything wrong with what you are planning to do to tell your husband. It's better that you say it, especially if you know your husband well enough that he will understand you. Your honesty can even make your wife wonder.

So, I also support the strategies you use in playing gambling and as far as I can see, you are a responsible gambler and you know how to apply self-control and self-discipline as a gambler. So, go ahead with what you are planning.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

<>
Does this worth telling him

yes, because being dishonest to your partner is a sin. That's called betrayal in a marriage.
If you have been gambling responsibly, I think there's you should not fear telling him the truth, besides, you are as one when you got married, so for sure he'll understand, if he would say no, then you abide since he is still the man, the head of the family.

Quote

or not please i need you collective ideas.

Why are you gambling in the first place?

If you just want to have fun, or doing it since it's part of your job^{(i see you are promoting a gambling site)}, I'm sure it's not hard for him to understand. Don't be afraid, being honest is being responsible.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

I am not sure how it would differ from you being a woman or a man, at least not where i live. If you are married, and not telling everything how you spend your money, i guess it goes both ways and your husband doesn't need to tell how he spends his money either. And it's totally ok if you want that kind of relationship and you want to keep your secrets. But if you have a strict budget and money is for both of you, and you want to plan it together, you might want to come clean. And then there's the question of why are you keeping those secrets? Don't you think that your husband would accept (or allow) gambling? Or are there some other reasons for it?

That being said, you seem to have a good grasp on how to avoid getting addicted and you are allowed to keep secrets. But if i can suggest that you might want to spend only your own money.

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Sharing the gambling habit is good, because we don't know how we'll be when we're gambling regularly. Someday we might be good and sometimes we'll be in loss and the same could be affecting our lives. By the time there needs to be someone to accept our mistake and redirect towards the right path. Not everyone does it, and when a Women says husband to gamble he should understand what support she had given him and according to that he needs to be responsible and have his limits. Maybe this can help with some sort of healthy gambling habit.

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Quote from: the rise on January 13, 2024, 05:32:01 PM

If you think it will increase your income and try playing gambling to gain experience and stick to your promises, you don't need to tell him because most likely your husband's answer will not support you and will even disappoint you, but if you are aware and you have gone too far Please tell your husband immediately so that you don't fall into deep gambling

Only applicable if you really have that set limitation that you can follow, but most of the time, gambler start getting addicted either they expereinced the decent win or they are losing huge amount of money, both sides have their respective emotions that can lead anyone to engage that much to gambling.

It's better to inform your husband to make sure that there's someone who can look on you, it will help not to lead yourself into addiction, knowing that your husband is monitoring you helps to control and follow that said limitation that you setup.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

snip
The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

If you think that your husband needs to know about your gambling activities, then immediately tell him and talk heart to heart that you are a responsible gambler, However, if your husband is someone who cannot control his anger for certain things, then it is better to keep those secrets forever. Not all couples are able to accept the fact that their partner is a gambler, you alone know what your partner's nature and character are, that can be a consideration whether you want to keep it to yourself or tell him.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
Not chasing profit after lost
Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
Not gambling with all my income or salaries
Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

Honestly sad that you didn't tell him about this. Put yourself in his shoes and you'd probably be mad at him for not telling you that he's gambling, while I do commend you for being very smart with gambling so there's that. Anywho, it would be a transgression honestly if you don't teach him the ropes of gambling. Cause one way or another a curious man will find a way to know what they want to know, it's better that it come from someone who's responsibly gambling than perhaps a friend that is belligerently wasting his money. Teach him how to play the games you love playing and it could even become a thing that you both do every now and again, which could further your relationship and bond.

Let him know from here on out of all things that you do especially if it involves money. You guys are married and if you have shared accounts this will be a massive bummer and breach of trust in my opinion, if it wasn't, it's still good enough to tell him about it you know.

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Quote from: the rise on January 13, 2024, 05:32:01 PM

If you think it will increase your income and try playing gambling to gain experience and stick to your promises, you don't need to tell him because most likely your husband's answer will not support you and will even disappoint you, but if you are aware and you have gone too far Please tell your husband immediately so that you don't fall into deep gambling

I have the feelings that the husband is reading this thread also unless if he is not a member of this forum, but then we have to face the truth as a community that practices just and right, and for that not telling the husband is a big mess waiting to happen, and if the husband later discovered that the wife is gambling secretly, it may not go down well with him also, and of that be the case, then we need to advice with rhe right set of advice and in my own opinion, is very inappropriate for spause to keep things away from each other, most especially things that involve high risk such as gambling.

If you say the woman should keep this away from the husband, it will eventually results into issues along the way most especially, if and when there are cases as regards to addictions and problematic gambling issues that requires the help of a third-party such as the husband.

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If you think it will increase your income and try playing gambling to gain experience and stick to your promises, you don't need to tell him because most likely your husband's answer will not support you and will even disappoint you, but if you are aware and you have gone too far Please tell your husband immediately so that you don't fall into deep gambling

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Quote from: Natsuu on January 13, 2024, 11:05:29 AM

Absolutely! Just let your husband know about your interest in gambling and assure him that you're being responsible about it, doing it for fun and not risking too much. Keeping open communication helps in any relationship!

But however I think there is still another much better choice they can take which is to not be involved in gambling at all, because they are married and of course not being involved in gambling will allow them to fully utilize the money they have for something they need in the family, meaning no unnecessary expenses. But on the other hand it is just a suggestion which in common sense is a much better option, and yes I respect every choice and decision they will/have taken by staying involved in gambling.

The point is to keep control and boundaries and along with being a responsible gambler, you really have to be strict in applying some of these precautions because as we know that in gambling there are so many things that look tempting that can certainly tempt you, On the other hand, it is not uncommon to find some gamblers out there who end up losing their control and boundaries due to being too careless until they finally get carried away and end up addicted, so the point is that changes in mindset and perspective are very likely to occur when you are involved in gambling, so my advice is that you really need to be firm in applying self-control and the boundaries you made before.

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Quote from: Johnyz on January 13, 2024, 04:39:11 PM

Quote from: angrybirdy on January 13, 2024, 04:26:52 PM

Quote from: Natsuu on January 13, 2024, 11:05:29 AM

Absolutely! Just let your husband know about your interest in gambling and assure him that you're being responsible about it, doing it for fun and not risking too much. Keeping open communication helps in any relationship!

it's easy to tell the truth particularly to our spouses, especially if you know there is nothing wrong with your actions and as you've said, you are a responsible in your actions and decisions, you can explain it to him properly so that you understand each other. let's always remember that having a good communication and comprehension is the key for a healthy relationship.

It’s always good to be honest with your partner, you just have to do it properly so your husband wont misinterpret your gambling activities. Its better to tell him now because for sure he will still find out, its just a matter of time. Always be responsible, gambling can ruin your family and I’d hope that your husband will understand your sincere explanation and won’t force you to stop gambling because it can be very addicting.

You must consider your decision before you gamble, so the interest in starting gambling will not be realized if you decide not to gamble because you are worried that your husband will not accept this fact even though you can gamble with responsibility and strict rules that limit you from gambling, I think different in this case because I would not approve of my wife gambling, she is the financial treasurer in the family and the wife's duty in the household is to be responsible for her family, I cannot imagine what would happen if my wife gambled and was addicted to gambling, she is sure will lose family savings and financial management will collapse due to gambling.

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Quote from: angrybirdy on January 13, 2024, 04:26:52 PM

Quote from: Natsuu on January 13, 2024, 11:05:29 AM

Absolutely! Just let your husband know about your interest in gambling and assure him that you're being responsible about it, doing it for fun and not risking too much. Keeping open communication helps in any relationship!

it's easy to tell the truth particularly to our spouses, especially if you know there is nothing wrong with your actions and as you've said, you are a responsible in your actions and decisions, you can explain it to him properly so that you understand each other. let's always remember that having a good communication and comprehension is the key for a healthy relationship.

It’s always good to be honest with your partner, you just have to do it properly so your husband wont misinterpret your gambling activities. Its better to tell him now because for sure he will still find out, its just a matter of time. Always be responsible, gambling can ruin your family and I’d hope that your husband will understand your sincere explanation and won’t force you to stop gambling because it can be very addicting.

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Quote from: Natsuu on January 13, 2024, 11:05:29 AM

Absolutely! Just let your husband know about your interest in gambling and assure him that you're being responsible about it, doing it for fun and not risking too much. Keeping open communication helps in any relationship!

it's easy to tell the truth particularly to our spouses, especially if you know there is nothing wrong with your actions and as you've said, you are a responsible in your actions and decisions, you can explain it to him properly so that you will understand each other. always remember that having a good communication and comprehension is the key for a healthy relationship.

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Quote from: madnessteat on January 13, 2024, 09:13:16 AM

Quote from: maydna on January 12, 2024, 09:30:07 AM

~snip~

In my opinion, she's not doing anything to make her husband leave her. What does it matter what she spends her free money on - going to cafes with her friends, going to the movies or gambling. She's having fun without inconveniencing her husband. At least I think so. But in fact a lot depends on how her husband treats gambling. It's quite possible that he doesn't tolerate it. Let's hope their marriage doesn't fracture after her confession.

Yes, perhaps that's okay from the point of view of those of us who don't know what type of husband he is because, after all, there are types of husbands who don't like dishonesty between husband and wife. Indeed, there is no problem if the wife goes to spend her money with her friends or with her husband, but this is gambling, and in some places, it is considered inappropriate to do so even though there are husbands who can accept their wife's gambling. But most husbands probably don't like it if their wives gamble because it's usually their husbands who gamble Grin

Yes, we can only wish their marriage well, especially after she admitted to her husband that she gambled. I think it would be better if she could be honest with her husband about his gambling activities so that later, there would be no misunderstandings between them.

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Absolutely! Just let your husband know about your interest in gambling and assure him that you're being responsible about it, doing it for fun and not risking too much. Keeping open communication helps in any relationship!

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Quote from: maydna on January 12, 2024, 09:30:07 AM

Quote from: madnessteat on January 12, 2024, 08:14:34 AM

Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

~snip~

I am not quite sure why you are hiding this information from your husband if you are a responsible gambler. I think that your husband should know that you like to gamble. A strong relationship can exist for a long time only on the full trust of spouses. Imagine how his trust in you will decrease if he accidentally finds out about it. There is nothing worse when you find out that your spouse is doing something secretly from you. Think about it and make the right decision.

Perhaps she doesn't feel comfortable telling her husband that she's a responsible gambler. But her husband should know about her gambling activities so that there are no secrets between them. We don't know what will happen if her husband doesn't find out about her gambling activities. Perhaps his trust will immediately decrease, and what's worse is that her husband could leave her because he has been dishonest. By telling her secrets about her gambling activities, at least it can let her husband know and perhaps she can stop gambling with her husband's help. Hopefully, she can make the right decision by telling her husband about his gambling activities.

In my opinion, she's not doing anything to make her husband leave her. What does it matter what she spends her free money on - going to cafes with her friends, going to the movies or gambling. She's having fun without inconveniencing her husband. At least I think so. But in fact a lot depends on how her husband treats gambling. It's quite possible that he doesn't tolerate it. Let's hope their marriage doesn't fracture after her confession.

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Quote from: stomachgrowls on January 10, 2024, 02:24:46 PM

Quote from: MAAManda on January 10, 2024, 02:07:57 PM

You have to tell your husband about your current situation, apart from being open about your situation, you will also have more control from the external side.

Don't know whether you will become a problem gambler or not in the future, but you will feel guilty someday (if you become a problem gambler), so, try to talk to him and ask him to understand you. I know this isn't easy because I also experienced the same thing some time ago.

Yes, it is one of the pros on which if ever you do find yourself that get addicted then there's your husband would really be able to save you up if you are really that not really tending to stop but it would really be that impossible that your husband wont really be stopping you on the time that he would really be able to know that you are dealing up with gambling not unless if that husband or both of you does have that same interest
on which stopping cant really be possible. I do agree on some points on here that you would really be ending up yourself on being that too secretive into your relationship if you do keep on hiding something from your husband. Dont wait out that things turns out to be worst before you would really be confessing something.

Its true that huge problems would really be coming out if you've been caught on doing something that the other one isnt really that knowledgeable about. There are ones who are really that
that might be that tolerating their wifes activity but it is really that impossible that someone wont be skeptical into this kind of activity on which we do know
that it could bring out some devastation into your finances.

Big problems start from small problems, covering up habits is a small thing, but it will become a big problem someday because gambling in particular (in the case of problem gamblers) will have a negative impact on other aspects. That's why I advise OP to be open with her husband about her current situation, even though there will be cons, OP will find more pros.

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Quote from: irhact on January 12, 2024, 10:11:51 AM

Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

Don't hide things from your hundred or loves ones, something as serious as gambling need to be told to your husband so he doesn't get angry when he finds out that you have been gambling with money that could have used for other things in the house. Regardless of it being your money that you're using to gamble and not the family money, you still have to tell him so it doesn't spoil your marriage. Gambling has spoiled alot of families, If you love him tell him on time.

If he finds out he'll think you're hiding other things from him and he'll never see you the same again to trust you so don't hide anything from your husband. If you're scared that he'll ask you to stop gambling, take your history of gambling to him so he can see that you're not just losing money but making some profits while you enjoy yourself and also make him to know that gambling won't interfere between your duties as a wife.

In relationships that have progressed to marriage, honesty is also a fundamental part and it builds sustainability, but it is not necessary to reveal all secrets to our partner because the first stage of marriage is just cultivating and observing as well as planting the gardens of the soul, if we trust enough, the door of the soul will automatically open. Living together is always very easy to know each other's secret actions and I think the husband here already knows the problem but as long as it's not at a level worth considering, respecting and waiting for the other person to open up is also a good point.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
Not chasing profit after lost
Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
Not gambling with all my income or salaries
Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

I think it better you tell than letting him know your gambling activities by himself of course as a responsible wife after informing him you should let him know that you had a total control of your gambling activities and assure him that your gambling activities wouldn't affect the family financially for instance your husband might suspect that part of the money meant for buying of stuffs is being diverted to gambling and be transparent from every deals involving both of you moreso you shouldn't let your kids knew that you are involved in gambling activities lastly you should try as much as possible to control your emotion in case of losses by avoiding transfer of aggression to your husband or kid/s.

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Quote from: SmartGold01 on January 10, 2024, 03:41:14 AM

Quite sometimes now i have been active in the gambling section and have pick interest to start gambling i have gone through lots of material in both the forum, i have seen that I can control my emotion as well as controlling my finance this includes;

Not involving myself in a revenge gambling
Not chasing profit after lost
Not involving oneself into compulsive gambling
Not solely replying on every game to be 100 percent correct
Not hoping that gamble is guaranteed
Not gambling with all my income or salaries
Among all, gambling for fun and not to enrich oneself

The point is my husband doesn't know that i have been secretly gambling and involving myself with gambling discussions and the rest, So, this morning when i woke something in me keeps telling me i should let him know to understand my involvement to practice gambling.

Does this worth telling him or not please i need you collective ideas.

I have an alternative solution for you. As you already know the Don'ts of gambling you can start practicing it and control your gambling habits.
Once you have done that and are fully in control of your gambling habits then casually gamble in front of your husband.
He will ask you about it and then you can say him you were gambling casually and then you will know how to proceed based on the reaction of your husband.
If he says to stop then you will find it easier to stop since you are in control of your habits.

Topic: Does it looks responsible as woman telling husband you gamble? - page 12. (Read 2300 times)