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Topic: Gambler avoiding friends after a big win. (Read 3111 times)

hero member
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September 22, 2024, 04:30:30 PM
Maybe he’s decided to avoid them because he associates them with gambling and knows if he meets them he might do something stupid and blow his winnings by gambling them away.

Maybe they always ask to borrow money from him and with a big win they will expect him to give them some. There could be lots of reasons why he is avoiding them, let’s not judge him without more context.

Not really, money is an amplifier of character it brings out the real side of you, he isn't keeping his distance because they might lead him to gambling again but the truth is that he's avoiding them because they are poor gamblers compared to him due to his change in status quo.. money causes a separation between people, someone who just recently made some millions wouldn't feel interested to hang out with his old friends that are struggling with little amounts of money, that's just how life is but like you said there could be lot's of reasons why he is avoiding them
sr. member
Activity: 1904
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September 22, 2024, 03:28:59 PM
The saying "Money reveal people" is quite common. I usually don't believe this phrase, and I used to imagine that friends would always have nice intentions towards one another, but I later realised that this is not true because life is full of diverse individuals, each with their own personalities and viewpoints.

It's best to never expect anything from anyone because everyone is out for themselves. This kind of behaviour is nothing new to me anymore, and whenever there are three friends, I usually anticipate one of them to have such an attitude. Why should you be surprised if it occurs amongst friends when it has even happened between blood brothers? When you put expectations on people all you will get from them disappointments so i have learned to live on my own and not expect much from people.
Presicely,and as a matter of fact,you just have to be available for yourself at all costs.A lot of people find it very difficult to adapt to good news and successful winnings, especially when it's between their circle.
Being defensive about your finances and overall wellbeing is a great form of self-care and you shouldn't be taught or told when to apply that procedure.
Stay in control of your money will keep you safe and minimize unwanted connections to yourself.
sr. member
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Yes, to me one thing I can contribute is money can only show you the real character of a human being. You may not really know your friend very well. Until money comes into his hand. That is when you would know who he is or who she is because Money will definitely Tell them on how to live their life and sometimes some people may be pretending that they like you, but whenever money comes into your hand, they will feel like you are ahead of them and they won’t let with you they will just start in you just like that
hero member
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Yes and I think if someone hides their winnings from other people then there won't be any problems, because the problem is usually like I said above, when someone tells other people that they have won but they don't want to share anything at all. to other people, especially some of my gambling friends, this can usually cause problems between friendships, and to be honest, for myself, I usually only tell about my winnings to one of my real friends who is really good to me, where I always share some of the winnings if I wins and vice versa he also does the same action when he wins, and this is a scenario that I think is useful where you help each other when you don't have money to gamble.

The point is that it's better not to tell them if you don't want to share any of the winnings you get even though basically for example they don't ask for a share, but sometimes I like to feel bad if I don't give them the opportunity to taste the money I won, and for me personally, I usually prefer to tell one of my real friends because he also often gives me a share if he manages to win.


You tell "one of the real", what about others who are real, lol. If you have real, it means you have fake too, why not cut off from the fake.
Sharing is subjective, and I don't see it as anything that should be an entitlement in favour of any party, sincerely if anyone keeps a worthy friend I don't see any possibility of this happening, it only sprouts when there is lack of trust.
If we avoid after a big win, remember the money will finish if misused and also before you won remember how you were rolling, don't allow money fool you.

Now I'm not saying that you "have" to share some of your winnings with others, I'm just suggesting something that can minimize the possibility of something that shouldn't happen like a problem happening because you don't want to share some of your winnings with other fellow gamblers, on the other hand I understand that the winnings are yours by right, but I think you'll understand what I mean if you're a gambler, but if you're not a gambler then I think it's unlikely that you'll understand what I'm talking about buddy Cheesy

On the other hand I'm just saying about something that happens in my gambling environment and is it wrong? I don't think so, because it's possible that other people also have the same gambling environment that when one person gets a win and he tells others but he doesn't want to share with others when the other person hopes to taste a small portion of his winnings to gamble or to enjoy then usually they will claim you that you are someone who is stingy and in my environment it is not uncommon for such people to be shunned by other fellow gamblers. And one of the reasons why I recommend hiding your winnings if you don't want to share them at all is to minimize the possibility of problems that shouldn't happen.
sr. member
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People easily turn selfish soon after they make a good sum of money. In a few people, this attitude doesn't get added because they could've experienced it earlier. Here, we can't blame the person who won big or the colleague who accompanied him. The person who won could've thought that these guys might request a share as they had been gambling together for years. Another thing is that the colleague might've felt bad for not winning and was jealous of his friend's big win. In simple terms, the real characters got exposed, and thats it.
There are indeed people whose like that on which on the moment that they would really be making huge money or winning then they would really be tending to go away or would be not be having that in connection into their friends or mingling with them just because they are afraid that they would really be asked out for some bonus money on which it is really just that too sad that there are people who are really that minding on this way without even tending to realize that there are friends which are real and doesnt really that tend to ask out if ever you do win up some big money.
People do really just love to generalize and having that kind of assumptions that they would really be asked out with some funds on which its a common reaction but as just said that not all
would really be something like this.

People who really going to ask for some takeaways from your earnings, though like what you mentioned there are cases that this kind of situation is being handle correctly, some gamblers who manage to win huge but still treated their friends the same way, but there are some who after winning the money is no longer showing themselves and start forgetting about those people who help and accompany them when they are still in the same state, people who been eaten by the pride because of huge amount of money that they've got from the casinos after luck permits them to win.

It is really just that a shame that there would be people or an individual who would really be treating up their friends to be on this way on which it isnt really just that right on having that kind of treatment into your friends and just like on what Oilacris said that not all people would really be something like this. It do really just turned out to become a culture that if there's someone who do win up significant amount of money
then they would really be tending to have that kind of asking for some small amounts or tips into those people who are close to them or simply with their friends and into those people who doesnt really like
to give out any amounts then they would really be that deciding that they would really be hiding themselves just because they dont really like for you to give some part of your winnings or simply you are just that too selfish with your wins. Well, its not bad to have that kind of approach because its your money but it is really just that a bit much on this case.
legendary
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People easily turn selfish soon after they make a good sum of money. In a few people, this attitude doesn't get added because they could've experienced it earlier. Here, we can't blame the person who won big or the colleague who accompanied him. The person who won could've thought that these guys might request a share as they had been gambling together for years. Another thing is that the colleague might've felt bad for not winning and was jealous of his friend's big win. In simple terms, the real characters got exposed, and thats it.
There are indeed people whose like that on which on the moment that they would really be making huge money or winning then they would really be tending to go away or would be not be having that in connection into their friends or mingling with them just because they are afraid that they would really be asked out for some bonus money on which it is really just that too sad that there are people who are really that minding on this way without even tending to realize that there are friends which are real and doesnt really that tend to ask out if ever you do win up some big money.
People do really just love to generalize and having that kind of assumptions that they would really be asked out with some funds on which its a common reaction but as just said that not all
would really be something like this.

People who really going to ask for some takeaways from your earnings, though like what you mentioned there are cases that this kind of situation is being handle correctly, some gamblers who manage to win huge but still treated their friends the same way, but there are some who after winning the money is no longer showing themselves and start forgetting about those people who help and accompany them when they are still in the same state, people who been eaten by the pride because of huge amount of money that they've got from the casinos after luck permits them to win.
member
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I think that avoiding friends when they get a big win is really a fact that often happens, and I think there are several factors that are the reason why they prefer to hide it rather than tell other people especially their friends, one of the reasons is obviously that they don't want to share part of their winnings with others even if the other person doesn't ask, but they always feel worried that other people who know about it will ask for a share especially if they are one of their friends, which means they are clearly someone who has a fairly stingy personality.

And the other reason might be that they really need the money for something, like buying something important for their life, or saving money or whatever, and actually I admit that the winnings are entirely your right and it's up to you to share some of it with others to party or to celebrate your winnings or not at all, all the choices are yours, But what I would suggest is that if you don't want to share any of your winnings with anyone then it's definitely better to keep it hidden and never tell anyone about it, because usually if you do tell and your friends want a share but you don't give it to them then it can cause problems in the relationship.
When ever someone people make a big win they start avoiding there friends and it is a common thing among gamblers greed giving out money is something is very difficult for them. They have this mentality that they took the risk them self and there is nothing to give out but that is a very bad mentality. And that is something that is common among guys. And I don't see anything wrong with given out money. The money might get finished and you will end up going back to your friends just give out an equal amount to them and put a smile on there face.

Buying something important with money from gambling. True doh but it is still not an excuse you can tell them and they will definitely understand. An not even share everything but given the little you can give is not baf at all.  I don't know for others but its a thing of joy to me to always give because when you die you are not going anywhere with anything. For does that have such mindset should reconsider. And have a change of mind.

Yes and I think if someone hides their winnings from other people then there won't be any problems, because the problem is usually like I said above, when someone tells other people that they have won but they don't want to share anything at all. to other people, especially some of my gambling friends, this can usually cause problems between friendships, and to be honest, for myself, I usually only tell about my winnings to one of my real friends who is really good to me, where I always share some of the winnings if I wins and vice versa he also does the same action when he wins, and this is a scenario that I think is useful where you help each other when you don't have money to gamble.

The point is that it's better not to tell them if you don't want to share any of the winnings you get even though basically for example they don't ask for a share, but sometimes I like to feel bad if I don't give them the opportunity to taste the money I won, and for me personally, I usually prefer to tell one of my real friends because he also often gives me a share if he manages to win.


You tell "one of the real", what about others who are real, lol. If you have real, it means you have fake too, why not cut off from the fake.
Sharing is subjective, and I don't see it as anything that should be an entitlement in favour of any party, sincerely if anyone keeps a worthy friend I don't see any possibility of this happening, it only sprouts when there is lack of trust.
If we avoid after a big win, remember the money will finish if misused and also before you won remember how you were rolling, don't allow money fool you.
hero member
Activity: 2996
Merit: 609
People easily turn selfish soon after they make a good sum of money. In a few people, this attitude doesn't get added because they could've experienced it earlier. Here, we can't blame the person who won big or the colleague who accompanied him. The person who won could've thought that these guys might request a share as they had been gambling together for years. Another thing is that the colleague might've felt bad for not winning and was jealous of his friend's big win. In simple terms, the real characters got exposed, and thats it.
There are indeed people whose like that on which on the moment that they would really be making huge money or winning then they would really be tending to go away or would be not be having that in connection into their friends or mingling with them just because they are afraid that they would really be asked out for some bonus money on which it is really just that too sad that there are people who are really that minding on this way without even tending to realize that there are friends which are real and doesnt really that tend to ask out if ever you do win up some big money.
People do really just love to generalize and having that kind of assumptions that they would really be asked out with some funds on which its a common reaction but as just said that not all
would really be something like this.
hero member
Activity: 1750
Merit: 567
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I think that avoiding friends when they get a big win is really a fact that often happens, and I think there are several factors that are the reason why they prefer to hide it rather than tell other people especially their friends, one of the reasons is obviously that they don't want to share part of their winnings with others even if the other person doesn't ask, but they always feel worried that other people who know about it will ask for a share especially if they are one of their friends, which means they are clearly someone who has a fairly stingy personality.

And the other reason might be that they really need the money for something, like buying something important for their life, or saving money or whatever, and actually I admit that the winnings are entirely your right and it's up to you to share some of it with others to party or to celebrate your winnings or not at all, all the choices are yours, But what I would suggest is that if you don't want to share any of your winnings with anyone then it's definitely better to keep it hidden and never tell anyone about it, because usually if you do tell and your friends want a share but you don't give it to them then it can cause problems in the relationship.
When ever someone people make a big win they start avoiding there friends and it is a common thing among gamblers greed giving out money is something is very difficult for them. They have this mentality that they took the risk them self and there is nothing to give out but that is a very bad mentality. And that is something that is common among guys. And I don't see anything wrong with given out money. The money might get finished and you will end up going back to your friends just give out an equal amount to them and put a smile on there face.

Buying something important with money from gambling. True doh but it is still not an excuse you can tell them and they will definitely understand. An not even share everything but given the little you can give is not baf at all.  I don't know for others but its a thing of joy to me to always give because when you die you are not going anywhere with anything. For does that have such mindset should reconsider. And have a change of mind.

Yes and I think if someone hides their winnings from other people then there won't be any problems, because the problem is usually like I said above, when someone tells other people that they have won but they don't want to share anything at all. to other people, especially some of my gambling friends, this can usually cause problems between friendships, and to be honest, for myself, I usually only tell about my winnings to one of my real friends who is really good to me, where I always share some of the winnings if I wins and vice versa he also does the same action when he wins, and this is a scenario that I think is useful where you help each other when you don't have money to gamble.

The point is that it's better not to tell them if you don't want to share any of the winnings you get even though basically for example they don't ask for a share, but sometimes I like to feel bad if I don't give them the opportunity to taste the money I won, and for me personally, I usually prefer to tell one of my real friends because he also often gives me a share if he manages to win.
hero member
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Maybe he's trying to save up or whatever the reason behind we can't judge things out and same with your statement we need to look at it on all the different sides of a possibilities.
Yes, we have to look at it from another point of view and we can't just look at it from the bad side, there must be a certain reason that he did that because it was to avoid or prevent his friends from borrowing money from him or something else, it could be saving money like you say, therefore we cannot accuse someone of something bad without having to know why he did it because everyone has a view on this matter depending on how they see it from any side.

I will also definitely do the same thing because I am not a gambler who actively gambles with my friends, let alone gambling together, so when I win my friends don't know I won gambling, so I can enjoy the money with my own family sometimes. Sometimes if my friends know I won they will come borrow money to gamble, but if they borrow money for their living needs I will definitely give it voluntarily without having to use a loan status, to be honest for me it is better to give money to my friends than I have to lend it and have to make me collect the debt and sometimes that can break my friendship with my friend. That's why avoiding my friends is better when winning gambling.

Aside all you mention,is there is any other need to keep off from them, just because of a Million made. I thought you could have made mention of hate, jealous observed from them. I don't see any need for the distinction though we can't conclude.

We win we avoid them, when we were still in this stage of losses we never avoided them, and you boldly say you're a good friend, laughable. Win in gambling isn't satisfying or secure anything except you use it wisely, in a nutshell the money will finish.
I do not conclude so fast, so I do not blame people immediately for their actions. How can I do that when I never investigated the two sides, and in some cases, you would detect that those who are alleging are actually the bad ones? Well, In my understanding of this and the little experience had as well, some people might be so selfish and would not want anyone to take a bite out of their goodies. This could be the nature of the gambler who won, but at the same time, his friends and people around him should just respect him for his behaviour, they should go and make their own money, and pray for a better life instead of focusing or backbiting about someone's success.

Again, in many cases, the winner of the bet may be exonerated in this, at least by his conscience and Karma because of the nature of the friend he keeps and the people around him. This is why I said we should not just judge outright without investigating first as cases vary. Some people are so bad, that they may never be satisfied, they may be jealous/envious and some may even cause threats which could include assault and robbery. In this case, you should not expect less from the winner. We should always be wise, many will never be happy with our success whether we like it or not.
hero member
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People easily turn selfish soon after they make a good sum of money. In a few people, this attitude doesn't get added because they could've experienced it earlier. Here, we can't blame the person who won big or the colleague who accompanied him. The person who won could've thought that these guys might request a share as they had been gambling together for years. Another thing is that the colleague might've felt bad for not winning and was jealous of his friend's big win. In simple terms, the real characters got exposed, and thats it.
hero member
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I believe that a person would never avoid friends for no reason. If that person from first post made such a decision, then there must be a strong reason for that. We can only predict reasons. Maybe that person is greedy and dont want to share. Maybe this big win is his life changer and he has decided to quit gambling, so he avoid those friends, because they might drag him back into gambling. Maybe that person is no longer interested in gambling. He has caught his luck and dont want to test it anymore.
If everyone could think like you, of course there would be no dispute between those who win their bets and those who win their bets of course have the right to use it for what they really want and we have no right to forbid them or ask for a share of the winnings obtained, however I think it really depends on a person's personality and I often see those who win their bets celebrating with their friends.
When this thread was first created, what I said then was that, have they truly checked the history of those people to see if they are truly friends or if they are just gamblers who meet on a regular basis at the gambling shop? Because we gamble in the same place and talk once in a while, that does not really make us good friends; there are friendships that just end at work.
 
The guy who won the game might have checked the risk involved if he continued to mingle among those people and chose the best part that will benefit him more, which is to let go and look for something else to focus his energy. He might have seen them as distractions, which could also be true. Probably the best advice they could offer him is for him to gamble more with the money.
STT
legendary
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If you have a big win then pay off your house mortgage and just in a smaller way you will be richer every month over years.   You wont have this pressure to decide who is the Judas in a group of 12, who wants this terrible decision in their life when they should be happy.  Nobody wants that, just do the most sensible thing and you will be living rent free with a house free and clear you cannot then lose you are a free man compared to most wage slaves.  

It sounds boring but its far more exciting to me minus any worry of being seen as a cash cow to pay out every time there is the drinks to pay for.   Just a bit richer every week every month means you can get a nice sports car with the excess cash financed and it will still be sensible more or less.  People who are poor dont have the experience with money, its the first mistake we'd all make due to inexperience best avoided imo.

 Its a very common story, the OP story the man won cash and lost friends and his net gain is negative now he is alone with nobody close to share it with Iam sad for him.
hero member
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At one of the local gambling shop I visited during the weekend I happened to listen to a conversation between two bald looking gamblers at the shop talking about one of their gambling colleague who had won a big amount of money amounting to a million in the local currency and due to that win this colleague of theirs' has been avoiding them since e won that money. From their conversation it was obvious that they were a circle of close three friends that gamble together.

Everything will become open with money in the end because money can open all the traits that are owned including the good and bad traits of a person will also be seen with money.

Cases like this are not new because in the end, things like this always happen when someone gets a big win even maybe I can also do something like this if I have a big win and I don't think this can be blamed even though this is a bad act but in the end this is an act of caution that someone has to be defensive about what they have.
We've even read about someone who won a fantastic amount in the lottery and when he received the prize he deliberately covered his face with a mask so that no one would recognize him and he would feel safe.
So seeing this would actually be very reasonable in my opinion because it is a defensive step even though the friendship will become tenuous but in the end someone who wins big must know and does not want to make his profits divided by the closest person so that can be a strong reason.

sr. member
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God is All
~snip~

Big money very often has a negative effect on people. They become arrogant and stop communicating with those who seemed to be friends with them before they had money. In my opinion, this is not surprising.

On the other hand, if the common interests of these people were only in gambling, then this lucky person simply decided to stop communicating in order to leave gambling as a winner and break all ties that can be associated with gambling. It seems to me that this is very likely to be true.
It's easy to say this but I would like to let you know that sometimes such winning of money comes with huge pressures from the peers and friend of that person and if you start with yielding to the request then it becomes a burden that you yourself cant meet up with so the best option is to actually ignore or snub some unnecessary fake friend because they are still going to be the ones laughing at you after everything has been exhausted.
legendary
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I think that avoiding friends when they get a big win is really a fact that often happens, and I think there are several factors that are the reason why they prefer to hide it rather than tell other people especially their friends, one of the reasons is obviously that they don't want to share part of their winnings with others even if the other person doesn't ask, but they always feel worried that other people who know about it will ask for a share especially if they are one of their friends, which means they are clearly someone who has a fairly stingy personality.

And the other reason might be that they really need the money for something, like buying something important for their life, or saving money or whatever, and actually I admit that the winnings are entirely your right and it's up to you to share some of it with others to party or to celebrate your winnings or not at all, all the choices are yours, But what I would suggest is that if you don't want to share any of your winnings with anyone then it's definitely better to keep it hidden and never tell anyone about it, because usually if you do tell and your friends want a share but you don't give it to them then it can cause problems in the relationship.
In every 12 there is always a Judas, it means if I have 10 friend's then I won a bet of $1000, I might decide to tell my friends because it's a big money a d even if we celebrate the winning I will still have up to 900k, but if I win something like $100 I will still tell my friend and they will be happy for me. It's only a greedy gambler that will win and not tell his friends because he thinks his friends will be expecting something from him...
However, there are some friends that don't need your money, they just want your sincerity, if you give them. They will take but they won't ask you.
There are really those individuals who doesnt really like on sharing up their winnings considering that you arent obliged to on giving out those kind of free or bonus or whatsoever called with those amounts.
They would rather prefer on going alone and would be leaving out their friends just for them not to get some portion of those winnings on which we know that not all friends would really be something like this
and doesnt care about whether they've been given something an amount or not. It is really just that there are people who are really just that too advanced on minding things.
It would really be just that depending on a certain individual on which there are those people who are loving money that much and there are ones who dont really care and still cherish their friends
over money on which this is something supposed to be on this way.
sr. member
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I think that avoiding friends when they get a big win is really a fact that often happens, and I think there are several factors that are the reason why they prefer to hide it rather than tell other people especially their friends, one of the reasons is obviously that they don't want to share part of their winnings with others even if the other person doesn't ask, but they always feel worried that other people who know about it will ask for a share especially if they are one of their friends, which means they are clearly someone who has a fairly stingy personality.

And the other reason might be that they really need the money for something, like buying something important for their life, or saving money or whatever, and actually I admit that the winnings are entirely your right and it's up to you to share some of it with others to party or to celebrate your winnings or not at all, all the choices are yours, But what I would suggest is that if you don't want to share any of your winnings with anyone then it's definitely better to keep it hidden and never tell anyone about it, because usually if you do tell and your friends want a share but you don't give it to them then it can cause problems in the relationship.
In every 12 there is always a Judas, it means if I have 10 friend's then I won a bet of $1000, I might decide to tell my friends because it's a big money a d even if we celebrate the winning I will still have up to 900k, but if I win something like $100 I will still tell my friend and they will be happy for me. It's only a greedy gambler that will win and not tell his friends because he thinks his friends will be expecting something from him...
However, there are some friends that don't need your money, they just want your sincerity, if you give them. They will take but they won't ask you.
member
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~snip~

Big money very often has a negative effect on people. They become arrogant and stop communicating with those who seemed to be friends with them before they had money. In my opinion, this is not surprising.

On the other hand, if the common interests of these people were only in gambling, then this lucky person simply decided to stop communicating in order to leave gambling as a winner and break all ties that can be associated with gambling. It seems to me that this is very likely to be true.
Completely agreed with this point because in last few years I have many peoples which suddenly disappear from the social media with mostly are having big wins and then never came back which was wired in early times but now after having understanding of this mentality and their mind-set its looking common.
There is no doubt about this as well with mostly peoples are having money they become arrogant and also stopped communicating even we have many which stop sitting on places where they spend long time like friends room or community rooms where we have good and bad things, but they avoid these all because now their life having change, and they never want to meet their old pals.
hero member
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It is quite unfortunate that some people can be like that, the worst part is that you can't really know the true face of a person in that time.
Money is very known to change a lot of people, only few people can still be grateful to their background even if they get richer, sadly a lot tend to change after getting lucky and earning more money than their circle, they start distancing themselves from their old friends in a fear of them taking advantage of his fortune or giving him the evil eye.

Gambling is such a crazy unpredictable world, one day you're betting somewhere with friends, the next day you're richer than them. People shouldn't be ungrateful and forget about their lives and where they came from after smelling some money.
legendary
Activity: 2310
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~snip~

Big money very often has a negative effect on people. They become arrogant and stop communicating with those who seemed to be friends with them before they had money. In my opinion, this is not surprising.

On the other hand, if the common interests of these people were only in gambling, then this lucky person simply decided to stop communicating in order to leave gambling as a winner and break all ties that can be associated with gambling. It seems to me that this is very likely to be true.
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